I licked his shaft, delighting in the sweet precome that dribbled from the head. No doubt about it, Aiden was sweeter than any candy. I teased him, swirling my tongue around the head, then moved to his balls and took them in my mouth. He reached out and ran his fingers through my hair, whispering my name.
When he gripped my hair, I thought now might be the time. I slid a hand under the sheets where I’d stashed the lube and pulled it out. As I continued to lick, I flicked open the lid and put a few drops on his crease, mesmerized as it trickled along the crack. I put a finger along the seam and spread it, making sure to rub some around his hole.
“Aiden?”
He grunted. “Shut up and keep going.”
I chuckled. The first time I breached him, he hissed and tensed. I stayed where I was, pushing in only a centimeter or two, giving him time to adjust. When his breathing evened out, I pushed in a little more, and he moaned.
“So good.”
His words spurred me on. One finger became two, then three. He was writhing, pushing down on my digits. Finally I thought he might be ready, but then I remembered….
“Fuck.”
“Yes! Do that.” His head popped up. “Wait, what?”
“I don’t have condoms.”
“Oh.” That nibbled lip again. “Do we need them?”
That was a good question. I’d only ever been with Brian, and it was a year and two tests before we ditched them for us. I had always been faithful to him and hadn’t had any sex since he died.
“I’ve only ever been with one man.”
He gave me that beautiful smile of his. “And I’ve never been with anyone. I don’t think we’re going to find two people who need condoms less right now.”
“You have to be sure. I don’t want you to regret this choice.”
Aiden reached out and stroked my cheek. “Remember when I said I trust you? Brian gave you the chance to go out and be with other guys, and you turned him down. You’re not made that way. Who could I trust more?”
Once again, he honored me with his belief in me.
“All right.” I kissed the head of his dick. “I have to tell you, the first time might be uncomfortable.”
“It’ll be fine, Tom. I know you won’t hurt me unnecessarily.” He wiggled his hips. “Now get on with it.” He waggled his brows, and I chuckled. Aiden was a light in my life that I never expected to find. Why couldn’t I tell him how I felt?
The lube was cool as I applied it to my shaft. The smooth, silky feel of it had me throbbing. I wanted inside Aiden in the worst way.
“I think we should do this on our sides. I don’t want to strain your legs, and I won’t hurt you. Will that be okay?”
He nodded, his eyes wide.
“What’s wrong?”
A quick shake of his head. “It’s just…. You’re thinking ahead, worrying that you might hurt my legs. That’s…. You’re a beautiful person, Tom.”
One insane thought passed through my head—I wondered if he’d ever call me Tommy. I missed hearing that name. It was like a special treat. Maybe one day.
I helped him onto his side, being careful not to move his legs around too much. We’d need to talk to his doctor to find out what he could handle so that neither of us injured him. Once he was comfortable, I ran my hand down his flank, wanting to calm him. I stroked my shaft with the other hand, making sure the lube covered everywhere. I lay down behind him, pulling him a little closer to me. My cock was positioned at his opening, and it was taking a lot of willpower not to rush this.
I leaned in and kissed Aiden on the neck. I thought he said something. “What was that?”
He shook his head. “I didn’t say anything.”
Why I didn’t believe that, I don’t know. Maybe because his voice was so soft? I slid up the bed and nuzzled his neck.
“Aiden, what did you say?”
“I swear, I didn’t say anything. I just… I can’t believe I’m here, with you, doing this. It’s like a dream, you know?”
“For me too.” And it was.
“Now get a move on before we have to start over. Not that I mind you rimming me, you understand.”
I laughed. In the weirdest of moments, he was making me feel good simply by being himself.
“Here’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to put the head of my cock against your hole, and you’re going to take it at your own pace. Don’t rush this! It will feel tight, a little uncomfortable, but if you try to go too fast, it’s going to hurt like hell.”
He nodded, and I went back to where I’d been a moment ago.
“Whenever you’re ready.”
“Okay.” He blew out a breath. “Tom?”
“Yeah?”
“Thank you for…. You know. Caring.”
I didn’t care for him—I loved him. Every goddamn inch of him was beautiful, and I wanted so bad for it to be mine.
Before I could answer, he pushed back slightly and stopped. He sucked in a breath and tried again. This time the head of my cock breached his hole, and he groaned.
“You okay?”
“Fuck, I didn’t realize you were so big.”
“Only a little more than average, baby.” I continued stroking his hip. “We can stop if you need to.”
His response was to push back more. The heat was incredible. His channel was silky-smooth and squeezed my cock.
“Nngh.” He threw his head back. “Tom.”
“What do you need?”
“Just you.” His voice dropped to a whisper. “Don’t hurt me, okay?”
And I knew from his tone that he didn’t mean during sex. He wanted me to be gentle with his heart.
“Not ever.” I kissed his neck again, loving how he tilted his head to give me access. “For as long as you want me, I’m yours.”
That should have been the moment I told him I loved him, and I still couldn’t get the goddamn words out.
When he finally had taken all of me inside him, he moaned. “Fuck, that’s amazing. I’m so full, and you’re so big, and…. God, I’m not a virgin anymore.”
“Nope. You’ve finally been with a man.”
“The only one I want.” He turned his head and peered at me. “Please? Go on. Show me what sex is supposed to be like.”
After a few test thrusts to make sure I wasn’t about to hurt him—and when he didn’t say anything—I pushed in deep.
“Aw, damn. More!”
Demanding little shit. I drew out and pushed in again, this time a little harder.
“Tom, fuck me! I don’t want you to be gentle. I want to know what it’s like.”
Okay, if that was what he wanted.
I pulled out until just the head stayed in, then slammed in hard. His entire body quivered, but he didn’t ask me to stop. I took that as a sign to keep going. In a few moments, I was hammering his hole, our bodies slapping against each other. It was only another minute before he was pushing down again, taking more of me inside him.
It had been too long for me. Between my thrusts, Aiden slamming against my body, and the way his ass was squeezing my shaft, I knew I wasn’t going to be able to hold back. I reached around and grabbed his cock, matching my thrusts with strokes. He mewled and keened and finally exploded all over the bed and my hand. His ass clenched even tighter, and I couldn’t hold it anymore.
“Coming!”
A few more thrusts and I was spurting inside him. I pulled him closer, sucking on his neck. God, I’d missed this closeness, this feeling of completeness. Aiden was it for me.
He shuddered a few times, then went still.
“Oh my God, that was…. Damn.”
I barked a laugh that threatened to turn into a sob. It was perfect. He was perfect.
And he was mine.
Chapter Fifteen
I WASN’T sure when or how it happened, but over the next month, more and more of Aiden’s stuff found its way into the house. Clothes filled two of the drawers in the bureau, his music emanated from the stereo system, a few Blu-ra
ys were tucked under the widescreen television, and a pink toothbrush with a glittery purple handle had made a home among my things in the bathroom. I thought about the times I’d picked him up and he’d come out with a full weekend bag that was empty when he left. It was gradual, and he’d been sly about it, but there wasn’t a doubt in my mind that he was making himself at home.
And it was good. Snuggling up to him at night, safe and secure. Waking up in the morning and doing things couples did together, like standing at the sink to brush our teeth or going to the kitchen and Aiden making coffee while I did breakfast. All of it was fresh and new, exciting and scary.
I still hadn’t worked up the courage to say the words. I had no idea why. Every time it was on the tip of my tongue, I ended up changing the subject to something else. Still, seeing him curled up on the couch, watching something on television? Having him singing in the shower? All of it was a level of domesticity I knew I wanted more of.
We were nesting, of this I was sure. Building something together. He continued to remind me he hadn’t finished my glass yet, and I insisted I had the artist, and that was so much better. He would laugh, but then say he needed to work for a few hours at least. It went slowly, mostly because he’d finish up his other orders, then start in on mine. Once I knew he had taken care of his other customers, I’d find a way to distract him, and my project would be forgotten for another day.
I knew he’d get it done eventually, and I looked forward to seeing it, but to me, spending time with Aiden was more precious than anything he could create, so if the project took a month or a year, it was fine, because I wasn’t going anywhere without Aiden.
ONE MORNING, while we were sitting down to omelets and hash browns, I looked up and found Aiden, his gaze locked on his iPad, and a thought slammed into me with such ferocity, I couldn’t stop it.
This wasn’t Aiden’s home. It was Brian’s. Sure, there were a few of Aiden’s belongings, but none of his personality. Everything else in the house, from the stainless-steel appliances to the water feature in the living room, to the complementary colors? All that had been Brian. It bothered me more than I expected. I wanted Aiden to be comfortable here, but how could he be if the only things that belonged to him had no real permanence?
“Aiden?”
He peered up at me. “Hm?”
“What do you think about going shopping today?”
His lip jutted out slightly. “Why?”
“Well, if you’re going to keep bringing more of your stuff in, we’re going to need to pick up some things to make you comfortable here.”
His eyes went wide. “I wasn’t trying to—”
“Why? Don’t you want to live with me?”
He shook his head, then stared at me. “You want me to…. With you?”
“Yeah, I do. I think having you here is amazing. You bring a smile to my face every time I see you. It would be a joy to have you living here.”
He gave me a lopsided grin. “Are you serious?”
“I am.” I got up, went around the table, and stood behind him, then reached out and massaged his shoulders. “I want you to live with me, if you want to.”
He didn’t answer. Instead he reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. Before I could ask what he was doing, he had tapped a button and held the phone up to his ear.
“He asked me, Livvy!”
Her squeal was loud enough for me to hear.
I squeezed his shoulders. “You little shit. You’ve been planning this.”
He shrugged. “I hoped, that’s all.” He went back to his call. “What? Oh, sure.” He pulled the phone away and held it out to me. “Livvy wants to talk to you.” He rolled his eyes. “Alone.”
“That’s fine. I’ll take the call into the living room while you finish your breakfast.” I bent down and kissed him, loving how he went limp as I did. When I stood up, he chased the kiss, frowning when I took a step back. “Later, I promise.” I pointed to his plate. “Now eat.”
I strode into the living room and sat down on the couch, then brought the phone to my ear. “Good morning, Olivia.”
“You really asked him?”
“I did. Are you okay with that?”
She blew a raspberry into the phone. “If you had any idea how much I had to listen to how perfect you are, how wonderful it is to be with you, how much you care for him. I swear to you, it’s enough to make me nauseous with jealousy.” A pause. “Thank you for making him so happy.”
Me making him happy? “You have no idea what it’s been like having Aiden in my life. He’s bubbly, sweet, and a total joy to be around.”
“Wait. Are you talking about my brother?” She laughed. “You’ve been good for him. He’s stopped talking about how his legs define him as a person. Now when he’s uncertain, he looks to you for hope and inspiration.”
Pride surged through me, infusing me with peace and serenity. That’s what I wanted to be for Aiden. A source of strength, a wall to stand between him and anyone who would hurt him. I wanted to be his lover. The one who he trusted to care for him, heart, body, and soul.
“Thank you.”
“Okay, so you know, you’re going to have to talk with him about his insurance. Once he’s living with you, mine won’t cover him as a dependent. In fact, a lot of things will change.”
“That’s fine. I’ll talk with my accountant and lawyer to ensure everything is settled.”
“So you’re really going to go through with it, huh?” She chuckled. “You’re a good man, Tom.”
“Yes, I’m really going through with it. Things are a lot better when Aiden is here.”
Then why can’t you say the words?
“If it works for you, I’ll bring the car by and we can pick up his stuff.”
That brought a peal of laughter from her. “Dude, have you looked at your house? Everything Aiden owns, with the exception of his glass stuff, is already there. He’s been moved in for weeks and was just waiting for you to notice.”
Sneaky little shit. That was all the more reason for me to love him. He challenged me in ways no one had. Made me look at the world and see something beautiful, simply because he was in it.
Then why can’t you say the words?
I gritted my teeth. That voice of reason really needed some work.
WITH GALEN’S and Robert’s help, we were able to get the rest of Aiden’s stuff packed up in one afternoon. Despite Olivia’s assurance that everything was already at the house, there were several boxes of things that hadn’t yet made it to our place.
I held up some books from the six boxes that had been artfully packed. “How come you didn’t bring these?”
His cheeks flushed. “I wasn’t sure you were ready to know about my secret obsession.”
When I turned them over and saw the covers, I grinned. “Hm. Cate Ashwood, K.C. Wells, Amy Lane, Mary Calmes, Hannah Walker, Eden Winters, Stephani Hecht, Ally Blue, Sean Kerr….”
“I don’t have to bring them if you’d rather not have them in the house.”
I chuckled. “Why wouldn’t you? They’ll fit right in with my L.M. Somerton, Hurri Cosmo, SJD Peterson, Shannon West, Freddy MacKay, Angel Martinez, S.J. Himes, E.M. Denning, K-lee Klein, and—”
“You read romance novels?”
“Love them!” I went to where he was sitting on the bed, packing away a few knickknacks. “Haven’t you looked at the bookshelves in the house? There’s a whole one dedicated to the genre. What’s your favorite?”
His eyes were wide. “I loved K.C. Wells’s BFF. I had so many feelings for it. But I think my favorite genre is shifters. Have you ever read Silvia Violet?”
“Oh hell yes! I love her stuff. Wes and Tristan?” I fanned myself, which made Aiden giggle. It was such a pure, sweet sound that my heart swelled to hear it. I sat beside him, happy to talk about something we were both passionate about. “Oh! Have you read Amy Lane’s Fish series?”
He shook his head. “No, should I?”
“God y
es! It’s intense.”
“Will I cry?”
I rolled my eyes. “It’s Amy Lane. Of course you will.”
He sighed. “I can’t believe you read them.”
“You don’t know the size of my collection. All my favorites are there, ready to be read and loved. I can’t wait to introduce you to Danny and Lance from SJD’s Plan B, and Olly and Joe from L.M. Somerton. Oh, and….” I scrubbed a hand through my hair. “Shit, there’s just so many I want you to meet. The paperbacks are there for the reading. Plus you can see the author’s signatures, which makes the collection even more awesome.”
I wasn’t kidding. I had signed copies of my all my favorites. Brian used to laugh, saying someone who looked like me shouldn’t be reading things like that. He teased me mercilessly about them, until he sat down to read them himself. Then he changed his tune.
“Maybe one day you can go to a convention with me. There are so many authors who would love to sign your books. I got Mary Calmes to sign a stack of them for me. You should have seen her face when I dropped them on the table.”
“What did she say?”
“She smiled at me and told me I’d just made her day. Then she sat there with me, talked about my favorite characters, and told me things she’d been working on. I was nervous as hell about approaching her, you know. I kept thinking authors are like actors or rock stars. They weren’t really interested in their fans. She and everyone else I talked to? To the person, they were sweet and kind and more than happy to talk to you.”
The sound of Galen clearing his throat startled us.
“Sorry, we were…. Um….”
Aiden chuckled. “Talking about a newfound common interest.”
Galen shook his head but smiled. “The car’s loaded. We’re ready to go.”
I got up and held a hand out to Aiden. “Are you set?”
His lip wobbled a bit as his gaze roamed the room. “This was my first real home. When I lived with our parents, I always thought I was biding time until I could get out of there. Then he went off on his tirade about gays, and I couldn’t stay there anymore. The problem was, I didn’t know where to go. I came to see Livvy, hoping she might have a suggestion. When I broke down and told her I was gay and what Dad had said, she wrapped me in an embrace and said that it was okay, that she loved me and that I could stay with her.”
Stained Hearts Page 15