“I wouldn’t mind. I’m used to it. They might think I’m dead if I don’t show up three times a day like clockwork.”
Jessie laughed softly. “Well, I hope you like my cooking enough that will no longer be necessary.”
“Me too.” He couldn’t imagine her cooking could be half as good as the diner’s. Beautiful women couldn’t cook, could they? No matter. He’d eat burnt food for every meal if it would make her happy.
Chapter Two
Dear Journal. I have arrived in Nowhere, Texas, and it is as the name sounds. In the middle of nowhere. I’m surprised a train comes here. I’m now a married woman, though that sounds so strange to me. My new husband goes by the name Bob, and he seems like a nice man. He doesn’t act particularly thrilled that I came here to be his bride, but that is exactly what I expected. Why would things change now? I’m still the same Jessamine I was back in New York. I haven’t suddenly become a wanted person just because I traveled halfway across the country.
He took me out for supper this evening, but starting tomorrow, I will be cooking meals for him. He just doesn’t know it yet. He thought we would continue eating at the diner in town for every meal, instead of his new wife cooking for him. I’m not sure why he thought that, but he seems to be a bit odd. Nice but odd.
I hope to be able to start a school by November first, as that’s the true reason I came here. I hope this marriage goes as it should. We will see how Bob feels about consummating the marriage. He has put my trunk in his bedroom so he obviously wants me to share a room with him and not take the spare room. Hopefully he will give me time to get to know him before we take that step.
When she had finished writing in her journal, Jessie quickly wrote a letter to Wiggie. She needed the older woman to know that everything was fine. She didn’t want anything to make the head of the orphanage feel worse. No one was quite sure what was wrong with her—and many had suspicions she was making the whole thing up—but if it was heart related, then Wiggie couldn’t handle any more stress.
After she’d finished her letter, she put it aside to mail the following day. Then she got up and found Bob in the parlor, reading a newspaper. “I’m going to take a bath. I’m not sure what time you usually go to bed.”
Bob blushed. “Not for another few hours. I’m not a farmer, so I don’t keep farmer’s hours. I have to be at work by nine.”
“Sounds good.” She found her nightgown and carried it into the bathroom with her. It felt odd to know she would be wearing a nightgown in front of her new husband, but what could she do? Stranger or not, he was her husband, and she needed to show him the respect he deserved.
She took a long bath, washing her hair and spending the time brushing it out before she ever left the bathroom. It felt good to be clean again after so many long days on a train.
After her bath, Jessie went into the bedroom and pulled out one of the books she’d brought with her, lying on the bed to read it. She knew most people preferred to sit up and read, but if she was able she always preferred to lie on her stomach. It made things so much more comfortable.
She was still reading when Bob came into the bedroom. “Are you ready to sleep?” he asked.
She put a bookmark into her book. “Yes, I’m ready.”
He turned down the lamp and undressed in the dark, slipping into the bed beside her.
“Is it all right if I sleep on this side?” she asked softly.
“It’s fine.”
She waited for him to reach out for her, but he didn’t. Instead they lay side by side on the bed, both of them on their backs and not touching. “What is a normal day like for you?” she asked.
“I get up around seven and stop by the diner for breakfast. Then I go to the shop and open by nine. I work until about noon and return to the diner for lunch. Then I work until five and head to the diner for supper.”
She frowned. “You know I’m planning on cooking meals for you, right? You could maybe keep doing lunch at the diner, but I’m happy to cook every other meal. And I’ll even cook lunch until I start teaching.”
“You can talk to the pastor about that on Sunday. He’s more in touch with when everyone wants to start school.” Bob suddenly realized how much easier it was to talk to her there in the dark. “Did you always live at the orphanage?”
“No. My parents died when I was thirteen. I spent a year being pushed from family member to family member, and I finally ended up there at fourteen. It was a good place, but most of the girls had been there from infancy. I never quite fit in.”
“I’m sorry to hear that. I’m glad you’re here now.”
“I am too,” she said softly. “I’m looking forward to meeting my students and starting up my school.”
“What did you teach back in New York? Am I right that you said you were a teacher?”
“Yes, I taught literature. I’m afraid I’m a bit of a bookworm. I’m not fond of math or science, but if you give me a book, I’ll devour it. I enjoy teaching writing as well.”
“What about history?” he asked. He had always enjoyed history.
“I find history much easier than the sciences of course, but I still prefer made-up stories to non-fiction. It just makes me happy to lose myself in a world of someone else’s imaginings.”
“Well, I’m sure the children in town will happily read anything you put in front of them.”
“Has there ever been a school in town?” Jessie couldn’t believe how easy it was to lie abed and talk to this man. All day she had tried to converse with him, and suddenly he was talking to her. She wasn’t sure why it was different, but she was pleased that it was.
“No. I was raised here in Nowhere, but there weren’t ever enough children for a school. My mother taught me at home.”
“That’s nice. My mother taught me at home before she died.” Jessie rarely talked about her parents, but for some reason she felt comfortable talking to him about them.
“How did they die?” Bob felt badly for her. His parents were still alive, residing outside town on the farm he’d been raised on. They’d have been there for his wedding that day, but he hadn’t wanted them to know he had sent for a mail-order bride.
“In a fire. I lost two brothers and a sister in the same fire. I don’t know how I survived.”
“I’m glad you did.” He reached out and squeezed her hand, feeling suddenly bold. He wondered how she’d react if he kissed her.
She felt a warmth rush through her at his touch. She was surprised that he was so kind to her. “Sometimes I am.” She had never voiced her feelings about that aloud before, but she’d wanted to for years. She wasn’t happy being the only survivor of her family.
It hurt his heart to hear her say that, but he thought he could understand it. He turned his head to look at her in the darkness. “Jessamine—I hope I’m not being too bold. May I kiss you?”
Jessie felt her heart skip a beat. “Of course you may. I’m your wife.”
“No, I don’t want you to agree just because we’re married. I want to know if I may kiss you because you don’t mind if I kiss you.”
She swallowed hard, considering his words. “I don’t mind.”
He rolled to his side and she did the same, facing him. He reached out and stroked her cheek with the back of his index finger. “You’re so beautiful. I find it hard to believe you’ve never married.”
“I didn’t leave the school where I lived and worked very much, so there wasn’t a lot of opportunity to meet men.”
“I’m glad of that. You never would have waited for me otherwise.” He cupped her face in both hands and leaned toward her, his lips brushing hers softly. Never in his life had he kissed a woman, and it felt strange to do so now.
Jessie expected a longer kiss than he gave her, enjoying the feel of his lips on hers. When he pulled away, she sighed. “You don’t like kissing me?” she asked.
“That’s not it at all. I want us to be able to get to know one another. Slowly. When we finally consumma
te our marriage, it will be because we both feel comfortable with it.”
She felt relief wash through her. “You truly don’t mind waiting?”
He shook his head. “Not at all. I believe it would be strange for us to try to pretend feelings are there when we just met today.”
She nodded, feeling better about the situation entirely. “Thank you.”
He smiled, brushing his lips across her forehead. “You’re welcome.” He rolled onto his back and let his eyes drift close, feeling confident for their future.
As she heard his breathing become even, signaling that he was asleep, she wondered if she was happy or a bit disappointed. Did he not want to make love to her because he didn’t like her? Or because he really did want to wait to get to know her better.
Either way, they were married, and they would spend the rest of their lives together. She would get used to the idea. Eventually.
* * *
As soon as it was light out, Jessie slipped from under the covers and found clothes, going into the bathroom to dress. She wanted to have breakfast ready before her new husband woke and felt the need to go to the diner. She could cook, and there was no reason for her to pretend she couldn’t.
She went into the kitchen and looked around for food, but found… well, nothing. There was nothing for her to make breakfast with. No eggs, no milk, and not even any bread. She wondered what he ate when he was hungry and the diner wasn’t open. Did he just drop in all the time?
She found a piece of paper and a pencil and sat down at the table with a frown. She was going to have to shop before she could cook anything. Who didn’t even keep bread and milk around? Her new husband, that’s who!
Jessie had just finished making her list when Bob walked into the kitchen, hiding a yawn behind his hand. “Are you ready to go to the diner for breakfast?” he asked.
She nodded. “I would like to shop so I can start cooking for you today, if you don’t mind.”
He shrugged. “I suppose that’s all right, though I’m fine with eating at the diner.”
“I would prefer to cook for you.”
“All right. I’ll show you where the mercantile is, and you can shop there while I go to work. They’ll deliver for you.”
“Sounds good.” She had wondered how she’d be able to get the food home, but knowing the mercantile would deliver made things easier. “Do you have an account there?”
He nodded. “Yes, I’ll introduce you to the shopkeeper, and you can buy whatever you want.”
“That sounds good.” She stood up, being sure to put her paper with her list on it into her reticule. She hated to shop from a list, but there was so much they needed that she didn’t really have a choice at the moment. As they walked toward the diner, she said, “tell me about the town.”
He shrugged. “Not sure there’s a lot to tell. We have about a thousand people in town and many others in the surrounding countryside. One fun thing to note is there’s an old man who lives in the woods just outside town. He has a long scruffy beard. People tend to be afraid of him, but he’s harmless. He could sure use my services though.”
She smiled at that. “He sounds like a character. I will try to avoid the woods.”
“You don’t need to. He really won’t hurt you.”
“Just sounds like someone I don’t particularly want to run into.” She preceded him into the diner and sat down at a table. “Are you going to be upset if we don’t continue to eat here for every meal?”
“I don’t think so. It’s just all I’ve ever done.” He looked over at the blackboard where the specials of the day were written. “Oh, today is ham and cheese omelet day. One of my favorites.”
“I have a feeling you say that about whatever they have for a special every day.” She’d never in her life met a man who wanted to eat out so much. What was wrong with him?
“I do. Most days anyway.” He looked over at the waitress who came to their table. “Well hello, Jane. I’ll have the breakfast special and coffee.”
Jane nodded, not bothering to write anything down. “And you?” She looked at Jessie as if she was surprised the woman was there. “Who are you, anyway?”
“I’m Jessie. Bob’s wife.” Jessie felt it was strange to have to introduce herself, but Bob didn’t seem to be willing to do it for her. “And I’ll have the special as well. And coffee.”
After Jane had walked away, Bob looked at Jessie. “I didn’t know you preferred Jessie. Is that what most people call you?”
She shrugged. “It’s what my parents called me. And all my friends when I was little. I haven’t had anyone call me that in years, but that’s how I think of myself.”
“Then I’ll call you Jessie, if that’s agreeable?”
“I’d like that a lot.” All of a sudden, she felt a great deal closer to him, knowing he’d use her nickname.
He reached out and took her hand, squeezing it in his. “We’ll have to go out and spend Monday with my parents.”
She frowned at him. “Why Monday? That seems like an odd day to go out into the country. Don’t you work on Mondays?”
He shook his head. “I don’t. And my parents live halfway between here and Bagley, Texas, so they attend a country church. I attend church here in town.”
“Sounds like Monday makes sense then.” Jessie squirmed a little. “I’m nervous about meeting your parents.”
“Why? They’re going to love you.” Bob couldn’t imagine anyone meeting Jessamine and not loving her immediately.
“I hope so. A lot of people wouldn’t want an orphan to marry their son though.”
“My mother doesn’t care who I marry as long as I give her grandchildren.”
Jessie smiled. “I’m not sure I’m quite ready for children yet, but she doesn’t have to know that, does she?”
He frowned. “You don’t want children?”
“I don’t want a new baby tomorrow. I want to get my school established first.”
“Have you always wanted to be a teacher?” he asked.
“Not at all. I’ve always wanted to be a great writer. But that’s not in the cards for me. Not today anyway.”
“I wouldn’t mind if you wanted to write one book or six.” He shrugged. “I hope you know we don’t need you to work. I can support us.”
“I do know that, but I made a promise to start a school, so I will start a school.” She shrugged. “I don’t go back on my word. Especially not to the woman who took me in when no one else wanted me.”
“How could others not want you?” he asked, having a hard time believing every family she knew hadn’t wanted to take her in.
“They didn’t want another mouth to feed. My grandmother wanted me, but she died a month after I moved in with her. After that, there was nowhere for me to be.”
“Well, you’re wanted here. I hope you know that. The whole town will be welcoming you with open arms because they’ll be thrilled to have a schoolteacher.”
“I’m thrilled to be that schoolteacher,” she said softly. And she was. She wanted to write books, but that’s what summers were for.
“I’ll introduce you to as many parents as possible tomorrow,” he said.
“Tomorrow?”
“Yes, tomorrow’s Sunday. Church.”
She frowned. “I’ve lost track of my days after so much time on that train.” She sighed. “I’m glad I had books to read or I’d have lost my mind.”
“Had you been on a train before this trip?”
She shook her head. “No, I’d never been out of New York before this trip.”
“Never? I guess I’ve never been out of Texas, so I shouldn’t be too terribly surprised.”
Their food arrived then, and Jessie picked up her fork. The eggs looked good. After taking a bite, she smiled. She could do much better than these. And their toast was slightly overdone in her opinion. She couldn’t wait to cook for her new husband. If he thought this was good, he would be thrilled by her cooking.
“Are you
going to come home for lunch today?” she asked softly. She wanted to start cooking for him, but it would take her a while to get bread made as well as the other basics taken care of. The man didn’t even have one spice in his kitchen.
He shook his head. “Why don’t we come here for lunch, but we can plan on eating supper at our place. Does that work for you?”
She nodded, a grin on her face. “I’d love that. I can’t wait to start cooking for you.” As a girl, she’d always helped her mother in the kitchen, and then Wiggie had insisted all the girls help with the cooking at the orphanage. She was ready to be a wife, even if he wasn’t ready for her to be one.
Chapter Three
Dear Journal, Today is my first full day of marriage, and it’s started out strangely. I went into the kitchen to cook breakfast but there was no food in the house. There wasn’t even a drop of milk or a spice. I made a trip to the mercantile and bought as much food as I could, and now Bob is taking me out for lunch, and he took me out for breakfast. I’ll be cooking supper tonight. I never dreamed I’d be married for more than twenty-four hours before I cooked a meal for my husband.
Bob did not expect me to consummate the marriage last night, which made me feel both sad and relieved all at once. I was relieved because I don’t yet have the feelings for him that I want before I make love with my husband, but I was sad that he didn’t seem to want me. Maybe he will send me back to New York. I don’t know. I still don’t feel like anyone wants me around. I hope I can get over those feelings someday. I don’t know if they’re just me, or if I’m reading people correctly.
The few people I’ve met in town so far have been welcoming, but I’m nervous about meeting Bob’s parents. They are farmers who live outside of town, and he plans to take me to meet them on Monday. Is anyone not nervous about meeting their in-laws?
Jessie spent the morning putting up the food she’d purchased, and starting a loaf of bread. The dough was rising by the time Bob arrived to walk her to the diner for lunch. She planned to make a nice pot roast with potatoes and carrots for supper. She had always planned to have a kitchen garden, but there was no place here for her to do so. She would have to continue purchasing her vegetables.
Jessamine’s Journal: The Alphabet Mail-Order Brides Page 2