Jill could feel the tension in Law’s muscles and the anger in his voice.
“There’s more, isn’t there?”
Law took a moment, then his electric blue eyes were staring down at her. He nodded.
“I was the last one to talk to him.” His whispered words were anguished. “Jill, I’ve researched it. He did all the classic shit. He was mirroring what he needed. He kept picking at me, wanting to know if I was okay. Wanting to know if there was anything wrong, if there was anything I needed to talk about.”
His eyes shimmered with tears. She cupped his face.
“And?”
“I actually laughed and flipped him shit. I said I was fine and told him to get a life.” He choked out those last words. “I told him to get a fucking life, can you believe it?”
Jill thought her heart would break. She pressed a kiss to the corner of his mouth. To his cheek. On his brow. Then she pulled back and looked at him.
“Love, you didn’t know what you didn’t know. Would you want Xavier hurting this badly for something he didn’t understand?” She gripped his big shoulders, her fingers digging in. “Would Xavier want you in this much pain? Would he want you holding onto this much guilt?”
“I don’t care what he would have wanted.” Law’s voice shook. A tear broke loose. “I want him here so I can kick his ass.”
Law took a deep breath, and gave a semblance of a smile. “That’s so not true. I just want him here and happy. Or I want him somewhere, happy and at peace. Jill, there was nobody better, and he deserved to have the best life had to offer.”
Law’s shoulders sagged and his head dropped. Jill had a tough time hearing his words. “He deserved to have a better brother.”
She pushed his chin up. “Have you ever thought that maybe his last thoughts were with you? Maybe instead of a cry for help, his conversation with you was exactly what it was, a big brother who was checking up on his little brother. An act of love and caring. He loved you, Law. You know this, don’t you?”
His jaw clenched and he nodded.
“Ash said Xave never knew how to bend, so the winds just kept coming at him until that day he shattered. Ash didn’t think he ever saw it coming, it just got to be too much for him one day.”
“What do you think?” Jill asked.
“I think Xavier was fighting and was in a lot of pain, but at his core, he was a protector. If he had an idea that he was coming to a point that he would kill himself and leave all of us this hurt and devastated he would have done anything to get himself help. He would have wanted to save us from this hurt. But his demons blindsided him.”
She waited for him to hear what he just said. It took him long moments.
His head slowly shook back and forth. He looked like he was coming out of a daze.
“Let me tell you something,” Jill started. “When Lorraine got cancer, she spent months trying to figure out what she’d done, what lifestyle change she could have made that would have prevented it. She beat herself up for months, blaming herself for having cancer. I talked till I was blue in the face telling her she wasn’t at fault. Finally, a really wise nurse told her to stop it. She explained to Lorraine that the reason she was trying to take the blame for it, was so she could somehow explain it to herself and take control of the disease, and ultimately stop it. The nurse gave her the harsh truth that Lorraine couldn’t give herself.”
She could see that Law was listening.
“That’s what you’re doing, Love. You’re thinking that if you’re to blame, you could have stopped this. I think your brother Ash is right about Xavier. He snapped.”
“What about the warning signs he exhibited?”
Jill sighed. “It’s possible you’re right. It’s also possible he was just checking up on you. You’ll never know for sure. Is beating yourself up accomplishing anything? Is it what Xavier would have wanted?”
He blew out a long breath and shook his head. At long last, she saw a dimple appear. “He definitely wouldn’t want me to be all mopey with you smiling at me.”
“Oh really?”
“Really. I think you’re right, Xave would be pissed as hell to see me wallowing. I remember him saying that the only thing worse than second-guessing yourself was third-guessing yourself. He’d sure as hell be disgusted with me letting this situation slip through my fingers.”
“What situation would that be?”
“You sitting on my lap,” he grinned.
“I’m intrigued. How would Xavier handle a situation like this?”
A dimple appeared.
Jill sent up a prayer of thanks to Xavier Thorne.
Chapter 9
He looked down at the woman in his arms, amazed. She was a gift. He didn’t know where she came from or who she came from, but he sure as hell wasn’t going to be stupid enough to let her go.
“You want to know how Xave would handle a situation like this?” Law repeated her question. Something settled inside him. He knew exactly what Xavier would be doing, and it sure as hell wouldn’t be talking about his brother.
Law gave a low chuckle and brushed back her silky hair as he looked into deep brown eyes that seemed to have all the answers to questions he never knew he needed to ask. He took a deep breath, savoring the tantalizing smell of spice and flowers that was Jill’s scent. He feasted his eyes on her breasts that swelled up over the modest cut of her dress. His finger traced along the lace that trimmed the bodice and watched her shiver. She pressed up higher, inviting him closer, but he was enjoying this moment. She deserved—and he damn sure wanted—a long, slow slide into seduction. He intended to savor every moment with this beautiful woman.
She surprised him when she reached down and caught his right hand in hers and twined their fingers together, the caress an erotic foreshadowing of the moment when their bodies would join. Jill brought his big hand up to her mouth, then licked the tip of each finger before sucking his thumb between her lips.
Jesus!
Law lost himself in the beauty and sensuality of her caress before he gathered himself and brushed her bottom lip down, opening her up for the kiss he so desperately needed. It was such a rush when Jill mewled with want as his mouth pressed heated, wanton kisses against her needy flesh. She let go of his hand and gripped his short hair, digging her fingernails into his scalp, applying just the right amount of pain to fuel his passion. Law cupped the back of her head and tilted her face so that he could deepen the kiss. He needed more, and more, and more.
When Jill bit at his bottom lip he was ready to roar his possession. His. She was his. Never had anybody gotten him like this woman. Jill had become as necessary as his next breath. Somehow, he’d found a woman who had peeled back his protective layers and nestled into his soul.
Law stood up with her in his arms and she broke the kiss.
“You’re not supposed to be able to lift me up like that. I’m too heavy.”
“You haven’t seen anything yet.” He gave a ragged laugh as he headed down the hall toward his open bedroom door. Law put his knee on the bed and ripped back his duvet so that he could gently lower her onto his white sheets.
Her dark hair spilled across the pristine cotton and he shuddered. “Lady, you look good in my bed.”
He loved the small pink buttons that ran down the front of her dress—it meant he could slowly unwrap and savor his present. Law dipped his finger into her bodice as he set about the task at hand.
“There’s a zipper at the side,” Jill said as she shimmied to reach it.
Law pushed her hand aside. “Nu-uh, we’re doing things my way.”
“What?”
“We’re doing things at my pace. I want to unwrap my gift slowly.”
A slow, shy smile of pleasure spread across her face. She liked that idea. Good. He wanted nothing more than to make all of her dreams come true.
Law released the first two buttons and caught a glimpse of the lacy white bra underneath. His breath hitched. He had to touch. He had to tas
te. He traced his fingers along the material, watching her shiver. Then he heard her gasp as his tongue followed the trail his fingers blazed.
Another button slipped free, then another, and another. Soon, he was kissing her bellybutton as she arched up on her heels. Law changed positions until he knelt between her legs and could hold her waist up high as he licked down toward the top of her white silk panties.
“So good,” she moaned.
Law unbuttoned the rest of her dress and spread it open, feasting his eyes on her olive skin decorated with white satin and lace.
“Ah, Jill, you’re gorgeous,” he breathed.
“I want to be, for you.”
“Then you’ve succeeded. You’re everything I’ve never known I’ve wanted, with your beautiful body and your generous heart. You are by far the most beautiful woman I have ever met.”
Jill felt like she was on a carnival ride. The kind she’d always wanted to go on but had always been too afraid to try. Just the look in Law’s eyes tempted her beyond imagination, and his kisses were the stuff of her most decadent dreams. How could she be here in this moment with the other piece of her heart? How was that possible?
Her lips trembled, and it was like he understood. He took a moment, his blue eyes electric. He didn’t kiss her lips. Instead, he stroked his cheek against hers and then kissed her forehead.
“Are you with me, Baby?”
“Always.” She almost blurted out ‘forever’. But that couldn’t really be true, could it?
“Good. I have never felt like this before. I need this. I need you. So much.”
Jill’s eyes stung.
He does?
“I do too, Law. I can’t wait any longer.”
His hands slid around her back and deftly unhooked her bra, then slowly guided the frothy lace off her body. His eyes heated as his fingers traced the curve of her breasts. Jill held her breath and waited to see what he would do next. She didn’t have to wait long. Hands that had starred in more than a few of her fantasies caressed her needy flesh.
“Jill, you feel like silk.” His thumbs languidly circled her nipples and she bit back a cry of need.
“No, Baby don’t hold back, I want to hear everything. See everything. There’s nothing about our time together that I want to miss.”
His words felt profound. She understood exactly what he was feeling. They both had been through the fire, and they knew. They knew that every one of life’s moments was precious, and when you had time with someone you loved, you cherished it.
Loved?
Yes, loved. She loved this man. It so wasn’t a crush.
She reached up and rubbed her knuckles against the scruff on his jaw.
“I’m with you Law, right here. I’m not leaving.”
His breath rushed out in relief. “Neither am I.” She cupped the side of his cheek and he closed his eyes, nestling into her caress.
“Law?” she whispered softly.
“Yeah?” His hands were molding her breasts, and Jill was having trouble taking in air. Everything felt so good, but she needed more. She needed to be filled with him.
“Please. I need you naked.”
He met her words with a husky chuckle.
“All right.” But he bent his head and twirled his tongue around her nipple before sucking the tip inside his mouth. She whined her pleasure. Sparks drifted in front of her eyelids. When he stopped, she opened her eyes and she saw both of his dimples.
“Stop stalling.” Her reprimand was nothing more than a breathy whisper. Law chuckled again as he got up beside the bed and shrugged out of his clothes. He whisked his jeans and his boxers off at the same time and she winced. She really needed to stop biting her lip; this time, she almost drew blood. But good lord, he was built.
He tucked his index fingers into the top of her satin panties and slowly stripped them down her legs until she was completely naked to his gaze.
“Beautiful.” His word a benediction.
She held out her arms. “No, you are. Please, come to me.”
His smile was strained. “I’m here for you.” He laid down next to her on the bed and gathered her into his arms.
As soon as he was close, she thrust her fingers through the silky hair on his chest and peppered kisses along his neck, ever upward until finally, Law’s lips crashed down on hers with a groan of satisfaction.
Every touch, every caress, and every kiss felt brand new with Law. His brand of passion was setting her on fire. He moved slowly and his chest hair teased the tips of her breasts. She ground herself harder against his body as heat flooded her core.
“So good.” His voice was a deep rumble as he rolled them over and he looked down at her, his lips a scant inch from hers.
“Law,” she pleaded.
He took her mouth in a desperate kiss, one hand roaming downwards until he discovered her slick folds and found her clit. He circled the swollen bud and Jill had no words, only inarticulate gasps of pleasure.
When Law slid two fingers inside of her, while circling and pressing her eager clit, nirvana rained down on Jill. She didn’t know where she was; what house, what city. Was she on planet Earth? Did it matter?
He’d found a home in his woman’s arms. He thanked all the powers in the world that had brought her into his life as he reached for the nightstand and found the protection that they needed for the moment. But one day…?
Jill spread her legs and guided him to the greatest pleasure of his life.
She reached up for him. Law took her hand and placed a kiss on the center of her palm. Ever so slowly, he tugged her arm so that it rested above her head, then he did the same with the other, so that her wrists crossed. Her eyes gleamed in the low light coming through the windows, her pulse fluttering at her throat.
Watching her fall apart was the most erotic thing he’d ever seen in his life. If she touched him, it would be game over, and he wanted to make their joining last.
“Are you trying to tell me something?” she asked breathlessly.
“Tell. Request. Beg. Anything I need to do so that you stay as you are. Can you do that for me, Jill?”
Her eyes widened, her thighs quivered, and she nodded.
Thank fuck!
Law intended to take great advantage, and it would start with another kiss. She had the poutiest, prettiest lips in the world. He swept down and plundered them. Her moans mixed with his groans. When he felt her arms begin to move, he reached up and held her wrists in a gentle, inexorable grip. He feathered kisses down her jaw, ever downward until he was tormenting one taut pink nipple.
When she shrieked her pleasure, his cock got so hard he thought he might burst through the condom.
He licked and savored her other breast as his hand slid slowly downwards until he found her wet, tender folds. He parted the lips of her sex and circled the hard nub of her clit. He knew he was torturing her by the sounds she made. When she was gasping and begging and on the precipice of ecstasy, Law gritted his teeth as he finally started the slow thrust into her tight channel.
An earthquake could shake the house apart and he wouldn’t notice—nothing but Jill and this moment existed. He looked down and Jill’s eyes were shining up at him, so much emotion and passion. She tugged and he let go of her wrists. Her fingers stroked down his jaw.
“Lawson,” she whispered. “You create beauty.”
Law shook his head. “It’s you,” he rasped.
Jill lifted herself up, taking him deeper. He was undone. Her eyes, her moans, her need, it all took him beyond anything he’d ever felt before. Law thrust again and again, into Jill’s tight needy body. She clenched around him, her fingernails scraped for purchase against his back.
“More. I won’t break,” she gasped.
“But I might,” he groaned as he met her each upward thrust with a powerful plunge that had her crying out his name.
He watched every expression that crossed her face, gloried in the joy and pleasure he saw shining up at him. Then she cle
nched and trembled and he forgot everything but her name.
The only thing left in his mind was the stunning image of Jill’s smile as they flew together into the stars.
Chapter 10
“Do you ever plan to answer that?” Jill asked at one point.
“No. Not when it’s my brother.” Law had to keep his phone on and accessible because he never knew when he would be called to base, but Ash? He could wait. For God’s sake, he’d already texted him a back-off message. The bastard should know enough to fucking back off!
This time, Law threw his phone onto his wadded-up pair of jeans beside the bed. Hopefully, Jill wouldn’t hear it vibrate when it went off again—that way, he could keep her totally focused on the important things.
“Are you sure? Maybe Asher needs you.”
“He has Eden.” Law laughed. “Let him concentrate on her, while I concentrate on you.” Law’s hands skimmed over Jill’s silken flesh and soon all thoughts of his phone were forgotten.
A long and wonderful time later, Jill rested across his chest while Law contemplated life.
His house alarm shrieked one sharp blast. Law jumped out of bed and swiped his Glock from the nightstand drawer.
He stood between the door and Jill.
“Law, answer the fucking phone.” It was Ash’s voice coming through the speaker on his security system out in the living room.
“What the fuck? Goddammit, what the hell are you doing violating my privacy like this, you asshole?” Law yelled.
“He sounds grumpy. That’s what happens when you interrupt a delicate mission.”
And that was definitely Cullen Lyon’s voice. Just what he needed, one of Asher’s teammates who was a smartass.
“Jill, stay right here, Honey. I have to deal with some immature asshats.” Law swiped his phone and jeans off the floor and stalked into the living room. He’d pulled on his pants by the time he stomped over to the alarm system.
“Don’t turn us off before you tell us the name of the woman,” Cullen whined. “She sounds—”
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