by Eve Langlais
As she breathed and dropped into a Zen moment, all the distractions around her disappeared. Literally, all noise stopped. She’d not realized how many were in the background until they went silent.
I’m not alone.
“Dominick? Are you out there?” she whispered. No way would he have heard her. No way was it him. The distance from the house to the site was too far. He couldn’t have walked here this fast. Unless he ran on four fleet feet.
Crack. Her mouth went dry. She wasn’t alone.
She couldn’t help but open her eyes and watch. Stare while holding her breath as a massive black cat stalked from the tree line, head low. It slunk, gazing at her with eyes she recognized. Too human in the face of an animal.
“Dom?” She hated the tremor in the single syllable.
It crept closer, and her heart raced even as she forgot to breathe.
Oh my God. I’m going to die. Eaten by her kitty-transformer boyfriend.
Instead of pouncing and eating her face, the panther got close enough to lie down and place his head in her lap.
It seemed only natural to drag her fingers through his fur, each stroke easing the tension in her. Releasing muscles gone rigid. Until her heart rate and breathing returned to normal, only to suddenly tense when the big kitty purred.
Panthers couldn’t purr. Then again, humans couldn’t change into animals, either.
Her phone buzzed, but she couldn’t check the message. She was too afraid to move.
She worried that someone in Dom’s family would startle him. But they remained alone.
And she saw—felt…experienced—when fur turned to flesh. Panther into man.
The thing that finally sent her sanity over the edge.
18
Dominick felt good. Head in the lap of his girlfriend. He could smell her. If he turned his face, he could taste her.
Yet, instead of sighing in pleasure when he tried, she squeaked and dumped him out of her lap.
He rolled to his back and blinked. “What the fuck?”
“You tell me. What the fuck is going on? Why didn’t you tell me you could turn into a panther?”
“What?” The contentment and languorous feeling left quickly as he confronted Anika’s frightened mien. “I don’t understand. How did I get here? What happened?”
She bit her lower lip. “What’s the last thing you remember?”
“The pet store. And some twerp telling me I should leave.” Then…nothing. Oh, fuck. He’d blacked out. Given his naked gangly bits plus Anika’s fright, he’d done something bad.
“You don’t remember telling me to stop the car? Getting out and stripping?” She swallowed and looked down before softly adding, “I saw you turn into a big black cat.”
“That’s impossible.” He rubbed his face.
“I saw it!” she hotly exclaimed.
“It can’t be.”
“Then explain it.”
“I had a blackout and scared you, obviously. But no matter how weird I was acting, I assure you, I am a hundred percent man.” So long as he ignored his dreams.
“No. You weren’t.” Flatly said, and it chilled him. Because he did remember some stuff that made no sense on the surface. Unless she spoke the truth.
He glanced down. “No fur now at any rate.”
“It’s the catnip. It does something to you. Makes you into a beast.”
The words chilled him because it reminded him of what the police had said happened to Thomas. A wild animal attack on a night where he could remember nothing after chugging the catnip juice.
It couldn’t be true.
“I think I need a drink.” He got to his feet and felt the autumn air on his bare cheeks and, worse, sucking the heat from his shrinking ball sac. A good thing she’d met his cock on a good day, because right now, he wouldn’t impress anyone.
She kept a socially distanced space between them as she accompanied him. “I should text your brother to let him know we’re on our way.”
“I’d rather not tell him about my incident.”
“Too late.”
He paused mid-step. “Stefan knows?”
“I assume so by now. Would Raymond have told him?”
He groaned. “Ray, too?”
It was worse than that. Mom and Tyson waited on the front porch.
The moment Dominick’s mom saw him, her eyes widened, and she whipped off her apron and had Tyson run it over.
Because wearing her Hug-the-Cook apron was so much better.
As Dominick neared, he noticed his mom biting her lip. Worried. So very worried.
“Are you okay?” she asked.
He tried to make light of the situation. “Apparently, little brother here isn’t the only one who thinks he’s a cat when a certain herb is around.”
“Thinks?” Stefan drawled, grinding out his cigarette and approaching. “When is this family going to have a sit-down chat about the fact we’re not quite human?”
“Don’t be ridiculous….” Dominick trailed off as he saw his mother’s face.
The terror and resignation.
“Oh, fuck. Mom. Do you know something?”
She glanced at Anika and kept her lips pressed.
“This is my cue to go.” Anika headed for her car, even as he blurted out, “No.”
He followed her, but she whirled and shook her head. “I can’t stay. This is all…” She stopped talking and eyed her feet before she sighed. “I like you, Dom. A lot. But this is too much for me. Too strange. I don’t know what to think or feel. I need time to process this.”
“And you think I don’t?”
“I’m sure you’re even more messed up than I am right now. Which is why I should go. Talk with your mom and family. Figure out what’s going on.”
“What about us?” Because, right now, that concerned him more.
She pressed her lips into a thin line. “We’ll talk later.”
“Promise?” A part of him didn’t want to let her leave. Wanted to throw her over his shoulder and drag her into the house. But at the same time, he could understand her confusion.
Hell, he was reeling and struggling with what she’d told him. Anika wouldn’t lie, and yet, how could he be a shapeshifter? A panther? A killer. Thomas had survived, but he could have just as easily taken the man’s life. Perhaps it was best she left before he hurt her, too.
He dragged her close for a kiss. She clung to him, her mouth hot against his. At least she didn’t recoil from his touch. It gave him hope, even as his heart sank as he watched her taillights going up the road.
Only then did he pivot and glare at his mom. “Do you have something you want to tell me?”
She looked small in that moment as she said, “I was hoping I’d never have to tell any of you.”
“Tell us what?”
“My brother made you in a lab.”
19
Mom
Nana Hubbard had truly hoped this day would never come. It wasn’t because she wanted to lie to her children. More like it remained the best way to protect them.
“What do you mean your brother made us in a lab?” Dominick yelled.
“I… Uh…” For once, she was without words.
Stefan, though, had a few. “Give her a break.”
“No!”
“Calm down,” his brother cajoled.
“Fuck being calm. I’m a fucking freak.” Her oldest struggled with his emotions. With reason.
“Mom’s not the enemy.” Stefan did his best to protect her even as she deserved Dominick’s anger.
“She lied,” growled her hurting boy.
“Yeah, and she’s gonna explain herself. Right mom?”
“I’ll tell you everything,” she agreed even as she’d prayed this day would never come.
“I gotta fetch Raymond. He’s in town pounding pavement, looking for your dumb ass. Pretty sure he’ll want to hear this.”
“My dumb ass?” Dominick growled. “How was I supposed to know I’d t
urn into a fucking beast if I ate catnip?”
“That’s my fault. Guess I should have warned you,” Stefan declared as he held out his hand to Mom. “Can I borrow the van? Because I doubt Ray’s gonna want to ride bitch with me.”
Nana tossed him her keys, which jangled as Stefan caught them.
“I don’t want to wait,” Dominick grumbled.
“Too fucking bad,” Stefan snapped. “You will wait. Have a can of tuna. Shit it delicious, trust me, I know.”
“Not hungry,” was the sullen reply.
“Then play with some string. Fuck, lick your balls or hunt some mice. I don’t fucking care what you do, but make sure it involves showering and some clothes. No one wants to see your junk.”
“Asshole.” Huffed as he headed upstairs.
Stefan pressed his lips together but didn’t say a word as he left.
With feet gone wooden, Nana headed to the kitchen, the one place she felt comfortable. She made a big pot of coffee with a little something-something in it. She needed the extra help.
Sitting down, she was soon joined by a rarely silent Tyson. He’d had a stressful day of doctor’s tests as she’d come to grips with what his episode with the catnip meant.
What am I going to do, Johan?
Her brother was dead and couldn’t help her. She was alone for the first time in a long while, even as many of her children surrounded her. Curious expressions adorned some of their faces—Pammy and Tyson. Anger on others—Maeve and Dominick. Pity on Stefan’s.
What did he know? How long had he known it?
Daphne had been allowed to go to a playdate after school. She was too young to understand. Heck, even Tyson might find it hard to handle. However, after what’d happened to him, she had no choice.
Time for the truth to come out.
Maeve broke the silence. “What the fuck is going on?”
“Language,” Nana said, more out of practice than care.
“Fuck language, Mom.” Dominick bristled. “What the fuck is going on? What’s wrong with me and Tyson? What do you mean, your brother made us?”
“Slow down a second and let me catch up,” Pammy interrupted, unimpressed she’d been asked to leave work early for a family meeting. It was only the fact that none had ever been called before that convinced her to make the trip to Richmond from Gloucester. “You’re telling me that Dommy and Ty got high on catnip and turned into cats?”
“I can show you what we have so far as proof, if it helps.”
Ray played the video footage from the drone, showing Tyson’s transformation—not the most convincing evidence. They all became true believers upon seeing the panther emerge from the woods and lay in Anika’s lap. And then he was a man.
“Well, fuck me to hell and back,” Pammy huffed.
“Language!” Tyson squeaked.
It almost made Nana smile, but fear kept her serious. Especially because, once the videos were done, they wanted answers.
“What the fuck is going on, Mom?” Dommy asked, gentler than before.
“So it was catnip for you, too?” Nana asked, wanting to be sure. “Odd, because you were highly allergic to it when you were young.”
“Did I turn into a kitty cat then, too?” he snapped.
“No. The fact you couldn’t is the reason you were deemed unsuitable,” she supplied softly.
That snapped his mouth shut.
“You knew he could turn into a panther.”
“Actually, what I knew was that he couldn’t. Which is how he—and all of you—ended up in my care.” He’d been her first orphan.
“You knew we were different.”
“That’s just it. I got you only because you weren’t. You were created to be something more than human. And when it failed… It got complicated.” She rubbed her forehead.
“I don’t care how fucking messy it is. We have a right to know.” The children let Dominick, the oldest, make the demand.
“Even if knowing could be dangerous?”
“I’d say not knowing has proven more hazardous,” Stefan offered. He dangled an unlit cigarette from his lips.
“Have you morphed, too?” Nana asked.
“Don’t change the subject.”
“You don’t understand. If you’re changing, then you’re in danger. If anyone realizes what you are, where you came from…” Her throat tightened as she said, “I don’t know if I can keep you safe.”
“Fuck me. We’re hiding from the government!” Raymond exclaimed. “No wonder I couldn’t find a goddamned trace of us in any system.”
“You were looking?” Nana shouldn’t have been so shocked. Raymond always had an insatiable curiosity.
“I was adopted. No offense, Mom, I love you, but I wanted to know where I came from. When I couldn’t find anything, I looked into the whole family. We don’t exist. And you never had a brother.”
She bit her lip. “I did, but he was wiped out by the company he worked for.”
She’d not noticed Stefan slipping away. He was leaning on the doorjamb one minute, gone the next. But she noticed his return because a few heads turned at his approach. Tyson, Dominick, Raymond. Maeve grimaced and said, “Ew. What is that awful smell?”
“Catnip,” Nana announced. “And keep it away from your sister. From the sounds of it, she might still be allergic.”
“That smells so good.” Tyson lunged for the plant, but before he could snare it, Dominick grabbed the pot.
He hugged it. “Mine.”
Tyson hissed.
Eyes wide, Maeve watched them both and exclaimed, “What has gotten into you both?”
It seemed obvious to Nana, but today’s youth didn’t have the same critical-thinking skills as in her day. “The catnip is making them high.”
“What?” Maeve blinked. “But they’re not cats.”
“You saw the video,” Nana pointed out.
“Which I still think has to be a trick. I swear, if I’m being pranked, I will lose my shit.”
“It’s not a joke, Maeve.” Nana only wished it were because she feared what the truth would do to her family.
Dominick held the grass out of reach of his brother. Barely. Tyson was only a few inches shorter.
Stefan had a reach better than both of them. He snared the pot, opened the back door, and tossed it.
The tension in the room eased. Tyson flushed and sat down.
Dominick did, too.
“So, let’s hear the story of our creation and why it involves catnip for some of us.” Stefan remained casual, yet Nana knew her boy. Knew he understood more of what was going on than the rest did.
“Are you affected by catnip, or is it something else?”
Stefan offered a tight smile. “I’ve learned to control it. By myself I might add, since I assumed for a long time that I was the only freak in the family.”
“You, too?” Dominick sputtered.
Tyson, on the other hand, relaxed. “Thank fuck it’s not just me.”
“Language!” This time, it was Maeve barking it. “What are you all talking about? I don’t understand.”
“Does anyone need cookies? I could whip some up. They’ll be ready in twelve minutes.” She needed to do something with her hands.
“No.” Synchronized and firm. Nana slumped.
To her surprise, Stefan was the one to come by her side and put an arm around her. “No matter what you did, one thing is clear. You loved us. And we love you. That won’t change.”
“Unless you made us freaks,” Dominick clarified.
“You’re not freaks,” she hotly rebutted.
“Notice she didn’t deny having a hand in our making?” Tyson was the one to sound bitter.
“I didn’t, but I knew the person who did, and I did nothing to stop it. Couldn’t. Because if I had, we’d all be dead.”
Maeve stood. “I’m making cookies.”
“I’ll—”
Her daughter glared her down. “You will sit and speak loudly as you start
explaining.”
The secret she’d held for so long was about to come out.
She took a deep breath and began her tale. “Thirty years ago, I was visiting my brother, Johan. He worked for some super-secret research lab. So secret I wasn’t allowed to know its name or location. Not that I cared. I was just in Edmonton to visit him and go sightseeing. I’d just gotten divorced, you see.” She’d felt adrift. In her late thirties, childless, and starting over.
“Blah. Blah. Get to the point.” Maeve snapped, hands deep in dough.
“I’m trying. It began over lunch.” In an Italian restaurant, because Johan knew how she loved her pasta.
They’d barely sat down, and she saw him fidgeting. Obviously upset.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
“You said the same thing when Mary-Anne died.” Johan’s wife, who’d gotten ovarian cancer. He’d dealt with it on his own. Took stoicism to the extreme. He appeared to be doing the same now. “I can tell something is bugging you. Is it your love life? Are you dying? Need money?”
He shook his head and finally said on a huge sigh, “Believe it or not, I am struggling with morality. I’ve done lots of bad things in my life. Things I would take back if I could, but none like the choice I’m being given now. I have to do something wrong. Bad. Evil.” His chin dropped until it almost hit the table.
“No, you don’t. You just said you had a choice.”
“It’s not that easy.” He sounded so morose.
“Is this about your job?”
It took him a moment before he nodded.
“What’s your boss want you to do that’s so bad?”
He didn’t spill at first. He pressed his lips together and shook his head. “It’s too dangerous.”
“Johan.” She murmured his name. “You can tell me.”
“I can’t. I’ve signed a non-disclosure agreement.”
Nana snorted. “You know I won’t tell anyone else, and it’s obviously bothering you.”