“Leave me alone.”
“Don’t you know you both have to be eighteen in California to do what you did?”
Stump turned away, tightened a screw in a chair.
“If I turn you in, you’ll have to register as a sex offender for the rest of your life. If I’m going to keep it quiet you owe me, big-time.”
Stump slammed his screwdriver into his back pocket, faced Dixon. “What a crock of bullshit. I have friends who hook up all the time and they don’t go to jail. I’ve looked up the law too. Even if they do get caught, it’s no big deal as long as they’re similar ages.”
“Bottom line is, I don’t want you around this place anymore. If you don’t quit, I’m going to run you out of here one way or the other.”
Stump shook his head. “Ain’t happening, Dude. Besides, you’re the one who has to worry, not me.”
“What’s that supposed to mean, rich boy?”
“I know you let the air out of my bike tires just to screw me over.”
Dixon scoffed. “Bicycles are for you children.”
“You were pissed off because I got the line-painting job and you wanted to give the work to somebody else so you could skim off some money for yourself. Then, when you knew I had an important meeting you saw your chance to mess with me.”
“You’re out of your mind, rich boy.”
Stump hated the rich boy comment. “You’re the one who could go to jail. I almost died by the river. That’s endangering a minor. I looked that up too.”
Dixon hooted. “You’re full of shit.”
“Oh, yeah? Am I full of shit when I say that I know you’re really Maria’s father?”
Dixon stopped dead in his tracks. His eyeballs bulged as seconds lapsed. Then, “Like I said, you don’t know shit.”
“That ain’t all I know. I found your notebook.”
Dixon stepped to within inches of Stump’s face. “I thought so, you little thief. I’m gonna have my cop buddies haul you off.”
Stump scoffed, “You ain’t gonna do that because I’ve already figured out your code: letters are numbers and numbers are letters—it was easy.”
Dixon’s jaw muscles pulsed like waves and his face went red. “You’re fucking with the wrong guy, rich boy.”
“So are you. I’ve known you’ve been swindling tenants and Mr. Kraft since the first day I met you. The notebook just proved it. So I’ve made extra copies and if you cause me any trouble, I can fry your ass. Who do you think the cops will want more, a kid who has a girlfriend or a jiggle-jawed thief who’s stolen enough money from innocent people to buy himself a pimp-mobile?”
Dixon looked toward Maria’s building and then back. “Have you told Maria?”
Stump crinkled his nose. “That would disappoint her. We both know that she thinks her daddy is a Mexican hero, and for some reason you want her to keep thinking that.”
Dixon nodded. “Looks like we have an impasse.”
“Yes we do. Furthermore, you never said anything to Mr. Kraft about me and her because she’s the only person you care about and you didn’t want to embarrass her. But now you and I both know if the truth comes out, her world gets turned upside down, and neither of us wants that, so I propose we make a deal.”
Dixon reared back his head and scanned Stump up and down. “A deal? I’m listening.”
“You leave us alone. If she wants to be with me, that’ll be her choice. If she doesn’t want to be with me, I’ll leave her alone, but either way, she decides for herself.”
“What’s in it for me?”
“I’ll back off, forget about my notes, and won’t tell her who her real daddy is. Oh, yeah. I won’t say anything about that college fund you set up for her either. That way the cops won’t confiscate the account or throw your ass in jail.”
Dixon’s jaw wiggled. “Oh, you know about that too?”
“I told you I translated the whole notebook, Dude. Like I said, neither of us wants to hurt her. So that’s my offer. We can destroy each other or we can tolerate each other for her sake. I won’t rat you out if you leave us alone. But the important thing is she makes her own choices.”
Dixon stared into Stump’s face.
“There’s one more thing,” Stump added. “No more gifts. It makes her think you’re a nice guy and we both know better.”
Dixon chortled and then agreed just as Stump’s phone rang. “I gotta go now.” He took the call. “Hey Myles. What’s up?” Stump asked as Dixon walked off.
“Bad news,” Myles said. “My mom has gotten worse. If you’re still okay with her living with us, I’m going to fly out to Oklahoma on Saturday, rent a moving van and bring her things back here.”
“Of course. We’ve already agreed.”
“Okay then. There’s a morning flight. I’ll take the bus into LAX. That way I don’t have to deal with my truck when I get back. You’ll have to get by on your own for a few days.”
A few days on his own? That opened up some extremely promising opportunities. “Sounds like a good plan to me,” Stump said, hoping he didn’t sound too excited.
Chapter Fifty-Nine
When Delores last spoke with Dixon he said he had a secret contact at the County Clerk’s office that could streamline some of the paper work. If that proved true this buddy could be pulling similar scams with other landlord-types and her case could broaden into an uncontrollable monster and require the assistance of the L.A. department. Some of those guys would try to shove her aside and break up the ring of bad guys without her. Then she’d be stuck in an ugly turf war that she couldn’t possibly win.
In the meantime she needed to round up some money so she could pay Lorraine’s rent on the first and hold Dixon off long enough to wrap up her investigation. Unfortunately, the only people she knew well enough to approach for a loan of that size were her mama and Tio.
On her way to El Centro, she wondered about the sanity of that frazzled woman in her rear-view mirror who was so pissed off at a current perv that she was willing to overlook the actions of a former perv, provided the former perv would give her the money she needed to incarcerate the current perv. The pretzel-logic made her bowels nervous.
As miles passed, Delores wondered how to beg for money from somebody she hated in the first place. Unsure of exactly what she wanted to say she grew more and more frustrated until she finally reached their block and desperately needed their bathroom. She checked the clock on her dash. She’d gotten there so quickly she must have been speeding the whole time. She rushed up their sidewalk.
“Hello, Delores,” Tio said upon opening the door. “You’re early.”
“The traffic was lighter than usual,” she fibbed as she stepped over the threshold. “I need to use your bathroom.”
Just then Mama came down the hall. “Hello, Delores,” she said in a cold tone before they hugged in what felt more like a rushed obligation than affection. “Let’s go into the kitchen.”
“I need to use your restroom first.”
“Go ahead, but I didn’t have time to straighten it up.”
Delores finished her business, then returned to the kitchen where Mama was wiping down the counters and Tio was seated at the table with his back to the window. If only she could say how difficult her life had become because of him. But she couldn’t afford to piss them off. That kindness-over-correctness tactic that Dr. Moreno liked seemed wiser. “Can I help you clean up, Mama?”
“Why don’t you just tell us why you wanted to see us? This is unusual.”
Delores had hoped to ease into the conversation more gradually. She glanced at Tio and had second thoughts about borrowing money from the man. He’d hold it over her forever—even after she paid him back. However, these were the only people who could help her burn Dixon. She changed her mind—and then changed it back again.
Suddenly, Mama slapped a dishrag on the counter. “Dammit, Delores. I know you forgot my birthday. Are you here to apologize?”
Good God. What brought that on? A
pparently Tio wasn’t any good at keeping secrets. “I admit I forgot your birthday, Mama, and I’m ashamed of that, but it has nothing to do with why I’m here. Can’t I just come because I love you?”
Mama shook her head. “Hogwash. I bet you want something. You never come unless you want something.”
Delores’s stomach tightened. She’d be damned before she’d let Tio and Mama ignore who was really the problem in the family. “Do you know why I don’t come around, Mama? Do you know why? It’s because I don’t want to hurt you. That’s why.”
Her mother looked at Tio and back to Delores. “You’re not going to bring up those fairytales again, are you?”
“They’re not fairytales, mama. They’re real. I remember when Simone told you about Tio touching us, but you didn’t believe us.”
Tio scooted his chair back and shook his head. “It wasn’t like that, Delores.”
“Oh bullshit, Tio. You know damn well what you did. Do you know how helpless we felt?”
Mama put a hand on her hip. “I saw him around you girls, and he never did anything like that.”
“It was late at night, Mama, when you were sleeping. He made us be quiet. How do you suppose we felt when you didn’t believe us? I’ve lost my sister because of you two.”
Her mama scowled. “How dare you blame us! Simone had a boyfriend and ran away with him. That wasn’t our fault.”
“I need you, Mama. Don’t you know that? I might be married some day, and have babies. But I can’t bring them around this monster.”
Tio jumped to his feet and pointed to the door. “That’s enough, Delores. I want you out of our home.”
“Screw you, Tio,” she said with no hint of Dr. Moreno’s kindness in her tone or mood. “I’m not done yet.” She looked at her mama again and flipped a thumb Tio’s way. “I know about men like this. They don’t care who they hurt. I can’t even tell you what I have to do to block out the pain he’s caused. That’s why I don’t call you or come by very much. It hurts me too much when I think of all he’s done to all of us, including you.”
Her mama threw the dishrag in the sink. “We go to church every week. That proves he’s a good man. Jesus forgives everybody. You’d be a better person if you did that too.”
The veins in Delores’s neck pulsated. “Forgive him? I can’t believe you’re even saying that. We’re talking about big-time crimes here. You’re both lucky I don’t have him arrested for what he did. I’ll never forgive him.”
Tio pointed to the door. “I said get out.”
With tears forming in her eyes, Delores rose and turned toward him, “You’re just a goddamn animal, Tio. You ruined our family. Your entire relationship with Mama is a lie. Someday she’s going to figure that out and you’re going to rot in hell for what you did.”
Delores ran to her car and slammed the door. Seconds later she realized she’d rushed out too quickly, but she wasn’t about to ask them to use their bathroom again. They’d hold that against her too.
Chapter Sixty
Delores blew right past Dr. Jeanine Moreno and flopped into her usual seat. “I got thrown out by a perv. I’m a cop. I should have been the one throwing him out.”
“Thrown out of what?” Jeanine said, as she settled into the remaining chair.
Delores launched into the details of her visit with her mother and Tio. Ultimately, she said, “By the time I got out of there, I was so angry I never got around to asking them for the loan.”
“Did you try to choose kindness over being correct?”
Delores scoffed. “I tried to, but it didn’t work. I swear, I could screw up a one-piece puzzle.”
“Alright then. If you didn’t choose kindness, what did you choose and what were the results?”
Oh, crap. Jeanine had a way of getting right to Delores’s secrets. “I’m ashamed to say it, Jeanine.”
“Well, we can talk about the weather if you think that will help you solve your problems.” She smiled, kindly. “Do you know why there aren’t many clouds in the desert?”
Delores sighed. “All I got out of it was a bad bout of diarrhea. Tio was damn lucky I didn’t shoot him for that too. After I got home I took a shower, washed out my clothes and then went to a bar.”
“A bar? To get drunk?”
Delores shook her head and brushed some stray strands of hair to the side. “I hate being out of control, Jeanine. I thought I could get my mind off what happened if I could pick somebody up.”
“Fascinating. Did it work?”
“Hell, no. I’m too ugly.”
“Oh, baloney. You’re an attractive woman. You should be able to cull a horny dude out of a bar any time you want.”
Delores looked directly at Jeanine. “To tell the truth, I had a couple chances but I was so bitchy I hated myself. Apparently nobody else liked me either.”
“Have you ever done that before? Felt out of control and then tried to pick somebody up, I mean?”
A vision of cowboy Clint flashed through Delores’s mind. She covered her face with her hands and bobbed her head up and down.
“Can you tell me about one of these situations?”
Delores sat back and dug her fingers into the arms of the chair. “A couple weeks ago, at the beach, I was angry with myself for being such a coward and pushing Gordon away.”
“Gordon? The English gentleman we talked about last time?”
“I didn’t tell you everything, Jeanine. After I ran away from Gordon, I needed a power trip of some kind to prove I wasn’t a coward. To tell you the truth, it felt like revenge.”
“Revenge? Revenge against Gordon?”
“Not against Gordon. I was angry with myself for getting scared in the first place.”
“So to convince yourself that you weren’t really a coward you did something that you thought was brave and reckless?”
“I know it sounds stupid, but I can handle the risk of recklessness way easier than the risk of romance.”
“Alright then. Tell me what happened.”
“I got all whorish and went to a cowboy bar and met a big guy. We went to dinner and then to his hotel."
“How’d that make you feel?”
“Powerful. When he found out I’m a cop he started asking me all these questions about whether I’d ever done it in a jail cell or with my uniform on, things like that. To tell you the truth it was kinda exciting to know I aroused him. That meant I was the one with all the power as opposed to when I was with Gordon and I couldn’t know if he’d use me and then dump me.”
“I see—”
“But when we got back to his room, he wanted to tie me to his bed and I realized I’d gone too far. I told him I changed my mind and made him take me back to the bar.”
Jeanine unfolded her legs. “So you didn’t actually have sex with him?”
“No. I felt guilty for leading him on.”
“But you’ve done this other times and actually went all the way?”
“A few times.”
“Alright, let’s go back to what caused all this and see if I can summarize it. If I remember correctly, when Gordon said he wanted to get to know you better, you recalled the helpless feeling you had when you were a little girl and Tio fondled you and your sister; since you couldn’t know if Gordon was using you in the same way, you felt out of control, so you panicked and ran away. But later, you knew that cops shouldn’t be cowardly. So you had to prove to yourself that you’re not afraid of the unknown, so you went to a bar. But then, when you found somebody you could manipulate, he got a little too creepy so you changed your mind. Do I have it right?”
Delores shook her head. “I told you I’m a nut case.”
“I wouldn’t say that. I once had a patient who dealt with similar problems by burning herself with cigarettes. She had dozens of wounds and said the physical pain was easier to deal with than the psychological pain.”
“Poor thing.”
“Life isn’t always easy, Delores. Now, I’d like to fast-forw
ard to the mini-war you had with Tio. After the blowup with him and your mother, you went to a bar again. Was that revenge too?”
Delores nodded. “I was angry with myself for losing my cool and never getting around to why I went there in the first place.”
“Okay. So you lost control again and wanted to distract yourself from your anger by going to a bar, but when it came right down to it, you got ugly, as you called it. Why didn’t you play nice, pick up some good-looking man-prize and go have a wild time?”
“I dunno, Jeanine. I’m so damn confused.”
“The common theme throughout all of this is control. When you become angry or meet somebody you’d like to trust, you feel out of control and to escape that feeling you find somebody else and let him think he is picking you up, but it is actually the other way around. You become the manipulator as opposed to the manipulatee. You are the one who has the power. Does that sound like anybody else you know?”
Delores glared at her shrink. “Oh my God, Jeanine. I’m doing the exact same things to men as Dixon and Tio do to women. I’m no better than they are.”
Jeanine nodded slowly. “At least you’re not stealing anybody’s dignity.”
“Yeah, that’s true. I just want revenge.”
“Or control. But, there’s something else you should know. All this bizarre activity is not really retaking control at all.”
“It’s not? What is it then?”
“It’s just another version of the same thing. You’re still allowing the guys you don’t like to control you.”
“How can that be? They’re not even there.”
“Oh, yes, they are. They’re deep inside your head. Anytime you react to something somebody else says or does, whether it’s run away or seduce a cowboy or anything else, you are allowing others to manipulate you, even if they’re not in the room.”
“Oh, my God, Jeanine. You’re right.”
“When it comes to relationships, there are very few guarantees. You might indeed discover that the Gordons in your life only want a physical fling. You might even get dumped by a few guys. Love isn’t always emotionally tidy. But what’s the alternative? Denying yourself real love? Running away from nice guys? Going to sleazy bars? How has that worked out?”
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