Soulless: A High School Bully Romance (The Privileged of Pembroke High Book 2)

by Ivy Fox

  And without missing a beat, he leans in and places a tender kiss on my cheek, and to my utter frustration, I shut my eyes and let him. Maybe because I know he needs it, or because I need him to kiss me just as much. Even if it’s just a harmless peck on the cheek.

  He then leans into my ear and whispers words that send a flutter to my stomach, making my palms sweaty and my chest tighten.

  “To me, you will always be my Snow.”

  With that sentence still ringing in my ears, and the feel of his lips still pressed on my cheek, he leaves me standing there, wide-eyed and floored. Not wanting anyone to witness my hot mess, I slam my door shut and lean against it until my heart steadies itself.

  Rome was right—Ash and I aren’t done; which means Ollie and I aren’t, either.

  I hit the back of my head on the door three times, one for each boy who makes me insane with their vile actions, as much as with their sweet ones.

  Wanting to take my mind off the mess that is my life, I rush to the bathroom for the cold shower that I need to get my mind thinking clearly. After a few minutes of chilled water running down my skin, I concede to the warmth my aching joints beg me to give them.

  While my head has been tormented and abused, my body hasn’t had a better go at it, either. I haven’t eaten right in months, and aside from the workout Rome gave me this past week, I haven’t done much to keep my health in check.

  I need to get back to my former self before the Grayson brothers ever entered my life. That girl was responsible and knew what her priorities were—get good grades to get into a prestigious music school, and keep a healthy lifestyle. I haven’t thought about either since I came to New York.

  All I seem to think about is playful, hazel eyes and tortured, amber ones.

  They’ve ruined me.

  I turn off the shower and curse at myself when I realize, in my haste, I didn’t even bring my tank and boy shorts into the bathroom. I grab a towel, wrap it around me, and step into my room to get my pj’s.

  Of course the minute I’m inside my room, another Grayson heartbreaker is sitting on the edge of my bed, his elbows on his thighs, his fingers latched together.

  “I thought you said you wouldn’t come back,” I snap, crossing my arms over my chest.

  Rome lifts his head, looking like death walked over him, and my heart thaws for him.

  “Funny thing. I can’t seem to stay away,” he hushes, standing up and walking toward me.

  “How come?” I ask, backing away from his advance until my body meets the cool wall, telling me I can’t run any further.

  “You know why,” he confesses, stroking my cheek with his thumb, making me lean into his soft touch.

  Yeah, I think I know exactly why he couldn’t stay away. It’s for the same reason I never wanted him to leave in the first place.

  He places his forearms to the sides of my head, his cheek rubbing itself against mine.

  “I missed you,” he lulls, his chest heaving already, just by smelling my hair. “I couldn’t even make it twenty-four hours without you. How pathetic is that?”

  “So pathetic.” I whimper when he presses his hard body to mine, trailing sweet kisses over my bare shoulder, all the way up to my earlobe, taking a big bite of it. My eyes roll to the back of my head, and my arms wrap themselves around his neck like they’ve done a million times before.

  “Did you miss me?” he asks in earnest, but I’m still too mad at him to tell him the truth.

  “No,” I bite back, and I feel his wolfish grin on my feverish skin.

  “You sure about that?” he teases, pulling at the end of my towel until it falls at our feet. His kiss still lingers at my jaw, as his hands roam freely over my naked body. My impulse is to find his lips and kiss him hard and passionately, but I still want him to suffer, even if my resolve is weakened with every touch.

  “You’re an asshole,” I moan out when my full breast meets his grasp. “Why would I miss an asshole?” I rasp, tugging at his short hairs to keep his lips on me.

  “If I’m such an asshole, why is this pussy dripping for me already?” he taunts knowingly.

  “It’s not.”

  “Oh, little liar, we both know it is,” he states surely, running his hand down my stomach, past my belly button, until he cups my aching core. “See?” he smirks, inserting two fingers inside me, making me bite into his shoulder, so I don’t cry out. “Already wet and eager for me. Always so greedy for me.”

  “You’re delusional.” I pant, and I hear his pleased chuckle.

  “Let’s see if I am, shall we?” he says before turning me around in one fell swoop, my face now pressed to the cold wall, and my ass, his for the taking.

  I watch him crouch down to his haunches, and before I am able to determine his intentions, I feel his hot tongue lick my wet entrance, wreaking havoc on my senses.

  “Liar. Always such a pretty, little liar. Your pussy is soaked for me, Snow, and I intend to lap all of its sweetness.”

  “Less talking, more action, Grayson,” I tease, unable to keep up with the charade.

  Another rich laugh hits my ears, but mine dies down when he begins to penetrate my slit with his tongue. He eats me out from the back, and in this position, it’s almost as if he’s reaching places I didn’t even know existed. I begin to rock my hips to find the rhythm that will have me seeing stars. His hands grab at my hips, so I can fuck his face unabashedly. When I’m close to cumming, he gets up onto his feet, and a frustrated growl leaves my lips.

  “Always so fucking impatient,” he scolds as he grabs a fistful of my hair.

  I hear the faint sound of a zipper being pulled down, and before I know it, his full girth inserts itself in my wet core, making me yell with how good he feels inside.

  “Shh, little liar,” Rome reprimands as he continues with his blessed torture on my pussy. “We don’t want company. Maybe if you play your cards right, you’ll get fucked by all three of us. But right now, I’m the one taking charge,” he grunts, fucking me mercilessly.

  His fingers are still holding my hair back, my own fist in my mouth so I don’t break out in a wild cry, while he unceremoniously pushes himself in and out of me in brutish force. All of my body sings in happiness as I meet his angry tempo, knowing that Rome always fucks me rough before making sweet love to me.

  He releases my hair, cupping my tender breasts in both his hands, playing with my sensitive nipples as he plows himself in me.

  “God, I could fuck you forever,” he moans, and the way he’s getting lost in my body tells me he just might.

  “Tell me, little liar. Tell me you want me as much as I want you? Tell me I’m not alone in this,” he pleas, the trace of vulnerability returning to his words.

  My arms crane back, holding his head in the crook of my neck so I can whisper in his ear the words he yearns to hear.

  “You’re not alone, Rome. I feel it too,” I confess on a pained cry. He bites my shoulder, leaving teeth marks that I’ll have to disguise tomorrow. “I missed you.”

  And this sets him off, his own pained wail passing through his lips.

  “I’ve waited for you. I didn’t know it, but I think I’ve waited for you all my life,” he continues, maddened by lust and crazed by love.

  “Rome.”

  “Fuck. I’m falling for you, Snow. I’ve been falling forever. Please catch me,” he begs, and a lonesome, joyous tear makes its way into the corner of my eye.

  “Always, and I’ll never let you go.”

  And with that confession still in the air, we both greet our nirvana, our names on each other’s lips, knowing there’s no turning back now.

  Not for us.

  Chapter 16

  Holland

  “We need to talk,” Ollie exclaims, holding me by the elbow and halting my exit from the dining room.

  Rome lowers his eyes to the floor and passes us by without saying a word, his lips thinning. I don’t like it. I don’
t like keeping us a secret, but when Rome said last night that he was going to tell his brothers about us, I hated that idea even more. I’d rather they hear it from me. I just haven’t found the nerve to tell them yet. I mean, they only returned home yesterday from their Thanksgiving break, and between Elle and Rome, I haven’t exactly had many opportunities to speak with Ash or Ollie.

  That’s a lie.

  I could have come clean over breakfast this morning. I could have pulled each of them aside and tell them I’ve fallen in love with Rome. And if they don’t like it, then it’s their problem—not ours.

  Instead, I kept shoving Henrietta’s fluffy pancakes in my mouth, hoping no one sitting at the table saw the little tender looks Rome threw my way. Not that Elle was very discreet about it, always remarking how her big brother can’t stop smiling. Thankfully, he just shrugged off all her taunts and blamed my mother’s absence from the table as the reason for his good mood.

  I can’t say it’s a lie either. Having Vivienne out of this house has been a blessing. I just don’t want Rome to think she’s completely out of our hair. I know my mother. Right now she’s stewing and thinking up a storm of vile ideas on how to get back at Rome for throwing her out. She’s not to be trifled with, and Rome’s arrogance, thinking he bested her, won’t do us any good. As I said, I know my mother. She’ll be coming for us. I just hope I see the warning signs before she hits us with whatever malefic plan she comes up with.

  “Snow?” Ollie insists, bringing my attention back to him.

  “This isn’t a good time, Oliver. I don’t want to be late for school on my first day back.”

  “School can wait. This can’t,” he counters, steadfast in his resolve to talk to me.

  I breathe in, nervous as to what he has to say. Maybe Rome and I were less discreet than I thought.

  “I don’t think that’s a good idea.” I bite my inner cheek, schooling my features, so he doesn’t see my rising panic.

  “No, Snow. You’re going to listen to what I have to say. There was a time you needed to clear things up with me, and I didn’t let you. Because of that one mistake, we drifted apart. Don’t let your pride do that to us again,” he pleas, and the urgency in his voice wins me over.

  “Okay, Ollie,” I concede, walking back to the empty table and taking a seat.

  Instead of Ollie taking the seat next to me, he grabs my hands and falls down to his haunches, tilting his head back to look me in the eye. His light caress on my hands leaves me even more flustered, but I don’t push him away. I just remain anxiously waiting for him to spill the thoughts that are running through his mind.

  “I know things have been awkward with us. I know that right now, I’m not your favorite person. And I get it. You’re right to have pushed me away. But I think you might have done it for the wrong reasons and I want to clear any misconceptions you might have.”

  His long eyelashes beat a mile a minute under his framed glasses, his nerves pronounced so clearly on his face.

  “What misconceptions am I under, Ollie?” I ask him softly, probing him to continue.

  “I think the night we slept together, I gave you the wrong idea,” he huffs out, ripping the band-aid off my unhealed cut.

  “And what idea is that?”

  “I think you believe that I regretted it.”

  “And didn’t you? It sure looked that way.” I can’t help but bite back. The bitterness I still hold for his rejection is outweighing any leniency I’m willing to give him right now.

  “Never. Not for one minute would I ever regret being with you nor loving you in that way. But I did feel shame,” he confesses, embarrassed, killing me all over again.

  “Shame,” I croak the word out as if it’s the ugliest word that has ever crossed my lips.

  His eyes continue to look up at me in earnest, suffering right along with me.

  “I was asleep, Snow. One minute I’m making love to you in my dreams and the next I wake up inside you. I freaked out. I honestly thought I took advantage of you. I sought your body out in my sleep and thought I took something from you that you weren’t ready to give. At that moment, I didn’t see the love we shared. All I saw was the monster sleeping dormant inside me. Just like him. Just like my father, Snow.”

  I swallow dryly, seeing the sincerity behind his every word. He’s nothing like that disgusting man who tried to corrupt my soul. This is Ollie, for crying out loud. He embodies all that is good and pure in the world. How could he ever compare himself with such a villain?

  “You didn’t take anything that I wasn’t willing to give you, Ollie,” I explain sincerely. “Is that why you told Ash it shouldn’t have happened? Because you thought, somehow, you took advantage of me?”

  He nods, looking even more forlorn than he was a minute ago.

  “I shouldn’t have said it like that. I should have explained it to you; how I have dreamt about making love to you since I was just sixteen years old. But I do wish our first time had happened under different circumstances. Me being lucid, for one.” He adds the last part, half-humorously, half-seriously.

  “Well, then I guess I was the one who took advantage of you, and not the other way around.”

  I begin to replay that night in my mind, recalling how he was asleep when I got into the bed. But since he called out to me, saying how much he needed me, I just assumed he had woken up. I guess I’m the one who abused his trust—his love—not the other way around like I thought.

  “No, Snow. You could never use someone like that. I’m yours. I’ve always been yours. So if you wanted to love me in that way, then I should have thrown a fucking parade, not make you feel like it was the worst thing that ever happened to me.”

  His eyes begin to sparkle with sadness for what we could have been, if only we weren’t so wrapped up in our own tragedies to see things for what they were. Unfortunately, the lump in my throat won’t let me say anything else, so he takes my silence as dejection, and slumps his shoulders.

  “I was a coward, you know? I would sneak into your room every night, telling myself you needed me there to protect you, to anchor you, but I was fooling myself. You never needed my shelter. I was the one who needed you to keep me from losing my shit. You have always been my north star, my beacon of light, and I lied to myself, thinking I could be that for you, too.”

  You were, Ollie. You were.

  “You’re so strong, Holland. Survived through so much, yet in my selfishness, I made you feel like you were weak, because I was the one falling apart. I’ll never be able to tell you how ashamed I am because of it. But I won’t be a coward any longer. I can’t. It’s what made me lose you in the first place.”

  I swallow dryly as he bows his head, kissing each one of my fingers. When he finishes, he tilts his head to me once more, love beaming, clear as day, through the hazel rivers of his eyes.

  “I thought if we somehow remained friends, I could still keep you in my life. So not only was I a coward, I was a fool, too.”

  “Ollie,” I manage to choke out.

  “Wait. Let me say this. I can’t be just your friend, because I’m in love with you. I’ve always been in love with you. And if friendship is all you’ll allow me to have, then I’ll accept it. But I’m going to fight for us. I’m going to make you remember how good we were together. And though I’m beyond redemption, I’ll hold on to the hope that, someday, you can love me again. I’ll keep that hope alive until my last breath, Snow.”

  The burning tears behind my eyes, prevent me from seeing him clearly, blurring his sorrow along with his resolve. But when he rises and presses his lips to mine for one precious moment, I could go blind from his tenderness alone and still see the truth in this one kiss.

  He then stands up to his full length, while I’m still too tongue-tied to say a word.

  “And even though you believe there is no Snow anymore, you’re wrong. Snow will always exist in my heart. I’ll just have to remind you that you are still that
girl.”

  And with his last vow, mimicking that of his twin’s from last night, he leaves me sitting there—torn and shattered with his beautiful words.

  When Elle arrives to leave for school, I’m still living in a fog of confusion and uncertainty. I’m split in three ways and not one bit closer in finding a resolution to my dilemma.

  I’m so lost in my head that, by the time the iron gates of Pembroke High’s crop up on me out of nowhere, I can’t even recall if we came by subway or by town car. I’m so out of it that returning to a school where malicious kids await me isn’t even a blip on my radar.

  Trevor Manning and Addison Hurst still give me the stink-eye at every chance they get, but today their cruel leers don’t even touch me. My morning classes pass by swiftly, and I honestly can’t remember one thing that was discussed in any of them. My mind is still too consumed by all that has transpired in the last twenty-four hours to care.

  Rome coming to his senses and acknowledging that even if he wants me to sort out my feelings in regards to the twins, being apart is just not an option.

  Ash telling me he has been in counseling for the past month, doing everything he can to be a better version of himself—just to prove his worth to me—still has my heart bleeding.

  Add Ollie’s confession of how he felt the night we slept with each other, along with his ambition for us to be together, and I’m a total wreck.

  I know what I feel for Rome. There is no doubt in my mind. The twins, however, are a whole other ball game.

  Can I ever trust them again with my frail heart? What if something else happens that they can’t deal with? Will they fall into the same pattern and push me away? Hurt me with their indifference or callous bullying? And the bigger question is; can I love all three brothers the same, or is it a pipe dream that holds no water to it?

  Can I love Ash, Ollie, and Rome and actually find peace and be happy?

  To all my other questions, my doubt is too profound to come up with a sure answer, but to the last one, my heart has already made up its mind.