by E L Thorne
I took everything that kiss had to offer me, relishing her surrender, reveling in her strength, loving her submission, completely encompassed by her need to live—as if she’d never lived. My eyes were open, studying the passion that washed over her features.
A roar deep in my brain reminded me that imagining it would be nothing like feeling it and that I should be feeling it. I didn’t want to scare this woman with my intensity. She’d been through so much in her life; that was clear in her soul, and it shone in her eyes when she forgot to guard against it.
The bear in me pulled at me to give us both what we wanted so much. What we needed. Craved. Yearned for.
Chapter Nineteen
Astra
My hissed “yes” came from deep within. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to give him the “yes” so much as that I couldn’t imagine ever not being connected to him.
How that had happened was beyond me. I wanted answers, but was afraid that I couldn’t even ask anyone. How could I explain this to Doc? He was like my father. He’d seen me as a little girl. He’d never accept this rash, rapidly reacting woman who was falling for Kane with the speed of a force of nature.
I wasn’t ready for Kane to take me into his arms, to pull me close to his hard body. “What’s happening to me?”
“Your soul is reacting to mine.” Kane’s lips moved against my neck.
He picked me up and carried me to the sturdy, thick-legged table, where he shoved everything aside and set me down. “If all you want from me is tonight, then that’s all I’ll give you. But I want more.” His words were almost a snarl. “Much, much more.” He lowered his head and groaned into our melded lips.
“Kane.” His name slid off my lips with ease, with the same sense of belonging that my own name did.
His teeth nipped at my jaw line. “I don’t want to rush you.” His lips landed on mine in a kiss that had an edge to it, as if he wanted to know I was for real. That I didn’t intend to back down, or vanish.
Chapter Twenty
Kane
A couple hours later, I wrapped my arms around her, holding her while. Staring into the fire, I marveled at the way her body had responded to me, the way her curves fit in my arms.
Silent tears were drifting down her cheeks. Her eyes were open, the red and orange flames enhancing their crystal green depths, giving her an otherworldly look.
“Why are you crying?” I ran my thumb pad over one tear, trailing it down her face, rubbing it away, wishing I could rub away whatever was causing her pain in the same way.
Astra shook her head.
“You don’t want to tell me?” I wouldn’t lie. A part of me was crushed that she didn’t want to share. At the same time, how could I blame her? We barely knew each other.
“No. I’ll tell you. I’m just not sure. Not really. Not exactly.”
Women. I’d never understand them. And I suspected that Astra would be harder to understand than most.
She sucked in a deep, ragged breath, then released it. “Is this why you wanted me to come in?”
This and so much more. For forever, a part of me wanted to tell her. That would freak her out, though. How could I explain the feelings I’d developed for her? They were too sudden, though I felt like she was the missing piece of a puzzle that I’d spent eternity looking for.
“Is that what you think? That I brought you in here to get some?”
She gasped at the severity of my tone.
I hadn’t meant to come across that harsh, but dammit, couldn’t she see this was so much more than that? I’d vowed to myself I would not rush her.
“I’m sorry.” I picked her up, carried her to the sofa, laid her on it, then covered her with the blanket.
“I’m not that kind of girl, to do what we did with complete strangers...” she began.
Was she worried I’d judge her? Was that what this was about?
“I know.” I was thankful the sofa was extra-large and long. I planted my body alongside hers, but above the blanket, to keep temptation at bay.
“Why did you really want me to come inside?” She bit down on her perfect, generous lower lip, as if the answer worried her.
Outside the wind was raging, while the inside of the cabin remained a warm refuge in more ways than one.
My bear growled, deep within my mind, urgently issuing a warning.
Of what?
“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.” I put a hand in her hair, twirled it around my fingertip. “How did you realize I was a shifter?”
Tear-filled eyes rose to mine. “I saw it, felt it. It’s hard to describe.”
“What do you mean?”
“You had the same thing that Grant and Doc have. That energy thing that I feel, that glow that comes from you.”
With a finger on her chin, I tipped her head back. “That’s not what people do. Normal people.”
Anger flashed in her eyes. “What the hell does that mean? Are you saying I’m not normal?”
“No. I’m saying that you’re—”
A deep rumbling shook the cabin, a deafening, cracking sound, almost like lighting. Then a rollercoaster feeling surged through my body.
My bear roared its warning again.
Astra’s eyes widened, her mouth forming a perfect O.
Outside, a loud crashing sound came from the driveway, or the mountainside, or both.
“Damn,” I uttered.
“Avalanche,” she whispered.
Chapter Twenty-One
Astra
“I’ll be back. Let me go check.” In a swift motion, Kane rose from the sofa and slipped out the door before I could tell him to get a coat.
I rose, wrapped the blanket around me and went to the shuttered window facing the driveway. Opening the shutter, I watched him shift into a massive, beautiful grizzly, loping toward the road.
I shook my head in disbelief. I’d slept with a shifter.
I, who hated shifters, had slept with a shifter. And what’s more, there was something about him that had drawn me to him. An undeniable force, as if we’d known each other a long time, had drawn me to him.
It’s not just sex, I told myself. There’s no way. I’ve had casual sex before, and this isn’t it. This was so much more than sex.
What had he been about to tell me?
I watched the snow whirling, worried about him as the minutes passed. Then I heard another loud crash. The cabin floor trembled beneath my bare feet. Still no sign of Kane.
That did it. I was going to find him. I ran to my clothing, throwing the blanket aside. I shoved my feet into my pants, and threw my coat on over my bra without bothering with my top. I pulled one boot on and was just starting on the second when the door flew open.
Red-cheeked and breathing deeply, Kane had a very worried look on his face.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Kane
Astra’s face was pale. “What is it?”
I drew a deep breath. “Your Jeep. It’s not exactly where we left it.” I noticed she’d gotten dressed.
“It’s gone? Where?”
“About thirty feet down the mountainside, on the curve, on the road.”
She breathed a sigh of relief.
I hated that I had to break the rest of the news to her.
“It’s upside-down.”
“Oh, no.” She closed the shutter.
“You’re dressed. Where were you going?”
She blushed, as if she were embarrassed by the reminder of what we’d done. “To look for you.”
I bit back a smile of amusement at the thought of her trying to help a grizzly. That she’d believed I would need her help.
“What’s so funny?”
Clearly, I’d failed at hiding my amusement. “Nothing. I think it’s cute.” I pulled her close. “You don’t need to worry. We’ll get someone up here to help with the Jeep. You won’t have to be trapped here for days on end.”
I thought I saw a shard of disappointment in her eyes. I
hoped that’s what it was.
“Maybe you’ll be stuck with me for a couple of days, though. That’s not so bad, is it?” I pulled her close to snuggle, fully intent on carrying her back to the bed.
Her jaw was set, a steely glint in her eyes.
Uh oh.
This wasn’t a woman who wanted to be cuddled.
“What were you saying? Before you left?”
“About you being—are you sure you want to hear it from me? You should hear this sort of thing from Doc, or Mae, or maybe even Grant. They do know that you can discern shifters, right?”
She shook her head tentatively. “Not exactly.” Her voice was low, like she was ashamed that she’d never told anyone.
I rubbed my jaw. Shit. This wasn’t for me to reveal. Doc should have discussed it with her. But how could he have, if she’d never told him?
“So, no one else knows? That you can see—feel—shifters?”
Another ashamed head shake from Astra.
“Look. That’s an inherited trait. Mother to daughter. I don’t know if it skips a generation. What about your mother?”
“I was young when she died. I don’t think she ever told me about it.”
Her phone buzzed.
I picked it up, looked at the screen and handed it to her. “It’s Mae. Probably worried. You should tell her you’re okay. And tell her I’ll take care of you.”
Astra pressed on the screen. “Mae?”
Astra’s voice sounded brave, but I could see the naked vulnerability on her face and wondered if Mae would be fooled.
“I’m fine. I’m with Kane. The Jeep isn’t quite okay, though. Maybe when the storm stops and the roads are good to go, Grant and Doc could come up? We may need some help with the Jeep, or at the very least, a ride back.”
I didn’t have the heart to tell her that if she was leaving, I wasn’t going with her. I couldn’t afford to bring danger to her. It already bothered me that she was here with me, now that I thought about it.
Foolhardy of me to bring her here. Selfish. I shouldn’t have brought her with me. If the rovers show up...
I quit beating myself up over it. Of course the rovers wouldn’t show. I’d done a good job of concealing my trail.
“Bye.” Astra pressed to end the call, then shook her head. “I need to talk to Doc. He’ll have the answers.” She looked at her phone. “I can’t call him now. My battery is low, and I don’t have my charger. And even if I did... There’s no freaking electricity here.” Her brows dipped in a frown.
“There’s no rush to get answers. We can chill here for a while.” I took her hand, indicated the bed with my head.
“The bed? Really?” She tilted her head.
“No. The sofa is fine, if you prefer. Don’t feel like standing for the rest of the day. So it’s the bed, the sofa or the kitchen chairs. It’s a one-room cabin. There are no other options.”
She studied me as if she was trying to gauge my intent, then nodded and pulled me toward the sofa.
I shrugged and scooped the blanket off the floor. She sat in the middle of the sofa, and I took one side, leaning back against the padded arm. At least Grant’s cabin had a nice, plush couch, even if he didn’t have electricity. I wrapped her in the blanket.
“Why do you hate shifters so much? Particularly when you’re related to one, and clearly have connections that are otherworldly and allow you to feel our presence.”
She leaned in, her back against my chest.
I adjusted, moving a bit, because the contact between us brought a certain part of me to attention, and I didn’t need her to accuse me of just wanting her. Though, God knew, I did want her. In the worst of ways.
She was quiet for so long that I leaned forward to see if her eyes were open, to ascertain if she was still awake.
She shifted her head so she could look up at me from over her shoulder. “They killed my mother. That’s reason enou—” She paused mid-word. Gasped. “They killed Anya.”
“Who’s that?”
She shook her head slowly, rubbing it back and forth across my chest. Her hair flowed over my forearm, tantalizing me with its scent. A scent of vanilla and lavender. I inhaled deeply, allowing that and her essence to sit in my lungs.
“My best friend.” She sat up abruptly, facing me, delectable in her bra and jeans, her hair wild around her face. “I forgot all about her. God, how did I do that? All these years, I’ve never had a thought about her.”
“What happened to her?” I pulled Astra back down against my body.
“When my mother was being attacked, Anya jumped to defend her, shifting into a tiger. Ohmigosh, my best friend was a tiger shifter?” A half-sob erupted from her throat. “Oh, no. Why have I not remembered this until now? I’m horrible. I haven’t even thought about her.”
“You probably blocked all of it.” I murmured soothing sounds to calm her, wrapping my arms around her.
Astra shook her head, as though she was refusing to accept my answer. “Anya fought with this huge bear. Then she fell. And Doc and Grant came. They killed the shifter that attacked my mom.” Astra’s voice was anguished, and tears welled in her eyes. Clearly, she was fighting them back.
“My mother was lying there, bleeding. What happened to the other shifter? Didn’t I see two? Why can’t I remember?” Astra rubbed her forehead, as if she could bring the memories closer to the forefront.
“I’d say you’ve remembered a whole hell of a lot. I don’t think you need to be so hard on yourself. Trauma makes people forget things. It’s a coping mechanism.” I pulled her closer, into an embrace.
Astra lay still, unmoving. Her pulse slowed, and sleep took over. She slumbered deeply, and the only thing that moved was her chest as she breathed.
The fire began to wane. I needed to stoke it, add some wood, but I didn’t want to wake her. Shifting into bear form, I kept her snuggled against my warm fur.
My bear nuzzled his muzzle against her neck and shoulder, taking in her scent.
We remained that way until the fire was almost completely embers and ash.
In her sleep, Astra screamed, the sound reverberating against the cabin walls, bouncing off of them, an offense to my sensitive bear hearing.
I shifted quickly before she could find me as a bear, and held her close.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Astra
My eyes flew open.
I was a young child again, hearing snarls and screams. For a second, I didn’t know where I was.
Then I saw Kane’s face, his jet-black eyes full of concern and care.
I’d switched position in my sleep, moving, turning, so that now I was huddled against his chest. I buried my face into his neck, inhaling him, breathing his comfort and security in deep.
“I had the dream. This is the first time I’ve ever been able to remember it when I woke up.” I shook my head to clear away the cobwebs. “Well, partially remember it, anyway.” I shivered.
“The fire went out. I didn’t want to wake you by working on it.” Kane planted a kiss on my temple, his lips lingering until they finally pulled away, leaving a coldness behind, where my flesh missed his already. “Are you okay?”
I nodded. “That’s the first time... I need to... I’m so confused.”
“Relax. You’ll talk to Doc when the weather breaks and we can get you back home.”
It hit me. He was planning to go. And what hit me even harder was that I didn’t want him to go. Ever. Where the hell did that come from?
“Tell me about you.” I let my lips touch the forearm that was holding me, hoping that he didn’t notice that I’d been so bold, though a part of me wanted to be so much bolder than that.
“Not much to tell. Lived in Texas for a long time. Looking to live somewhere else. I’ve never really put roots down.” His ruggedly handsome face took on a scowl, his eyebrows dropping into a frown.
“What was that about? That frown.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Kane
“Nothing. Just not much to share.” I forced a smile to my face.
I’d so much rather talk about her; she was the interesting one. And she was a supernatural being of some kind. What though? A seer, maybe? Surely Doc knew. Grant had to have known, too. Why wouldn’t they tell her? I wondered if her mother had been one. If she had been, then they’d have known.
“Okay, if you won’t talk about that, then tell me why you’re on the run.”
I ticked off a finger. “I’m being hunted.” I ticked a second finger. “I’m outnumbered.” A third finger. “And I’m not interested in finding out how many shifters I can take out before they kill me.” I hoped I wouldn’t have to find out.
“Why are you being hunted?”
“I ran across a couple of shifters accosting another one. A smaller shifter. I haven’t confirmed it because I’m not likely to have a friendly conversation with them—but I think they were trying to kidnap her.”
“Why would they kidnap her?”
“All sorts of reasons. Selling her, keeping her as a pet, using her for ransom, a territory dispute... Who the hell knows? All I knew was that it wasn’t a fair fight. So I evened the odds up a bit. Except one of them ended up dead. The other ran off. And now, here I am, on the run, with a bounty on my head.”
“So I could make some money if I told anyone your whereabouts?” She cut a sideways glance my way, a smile on her face.
I was happy to see her smiling. The way that dream—nightmare—had affected her had bothered me. I was worried that the dream would ruin our evening.