by James Hunt
“You aren't going to take all of those are you?” She asked with such an innocent voice. She had no idea what these funny little pills would do to these funny little men and to her funny little world. It's a little... funny. How could she possibly know? She was nothing more than a silly little pothead girl. An innocent in the world of mind altering substances. She had seen more of the drug world than her boyfriend had though. He looked a little scared, but soon bottled the emotion right along with every other real feeling that crept into his damaged psyche.
“Of course not!” A smile stretching from my left ear to my right, “that would just be unbalanced.” She looked away feeling dumb for having asked such a ridiculous question. “I'm going to eat half, and your BOY TOY here is going to eat the other half,” I stated very calmly, but with an annoying emphasis on 'boy toy.' The horror returned and she looked to Zach for reassurance that this was not about to happen. No response from the freak.
We quickly gobbled up the pills, washing them down with generic raspberry soda, also compliments of our local WallyWhirled, and we descended to the basement. I sat and played on the drums for a bit while the couple stood in amazement at my impressive collection of musical instruments and devices. I owned a drum set, three electric guitars, a half stack amp, a PA system, three microphones, a keyboard, a delay effects pedal, a synth wah pedal, a Jekyll & Hyde Ultimate Overdrive and Distortion pedal, an octave pedal, an Ibanez bass guitar, and many other sound altering contraptions. They didn't stay impressed long though, as they soon found other things in the basement to focus on. Zach's girlfriend, whose name I couldn't remember, sat on my futon trying to avoid crushing the many musical gadgets on it. That's a cum stain you're sitting on, you silly little girl. I turned on some Red Hot Chili Peppers – they are a good band to play when in the company of people whose musical preferences you are unaware of, because no one objects to the Peppers. Zach was, rudely, going through one of the boxes under my speaker cabinet. He dragged the box out into the middle of the vast, unfinished basement. The sound the box made against uncarpeted cement floor disturbed me from my drum playing. I looked over at him to find him rifling through my father's shit. I was suddenly curious as to what he might find in there–This really has no relevance to the story, does it? No, but it is in my memories so it must be noted. He pulled out a bag which looked as though it contained bottles of some sort of supplement. He eyed it carefully.
“Shark supplement!” He said. “This is shark, man!” I shuffled over to see just what in the hell he was talking about. What would my dad be doing with bits of shark in capsules? The stench of fish was almost unbearable as I approached the distracted child sitting on the cement floor of my very open basement holding a bottle of shark supplements.
Fast Forward.
I'm playing my drums again. I look over at Zach.
“Ugh, man, I'm getting that stupid feeling in my brain from the shit kickin' in,” I said, “You know what I'm talking about?” He looked at me and looked away. What the fuck? Is he not even going to acknowledge the fact that I asked him a perfectly reasonable question? Something’s not right here. There is something that isn't as it seems. I asked him again about past experiences with robo. He repeated what he had said earlier. His story was vague and lacking certain details that should be present in all robo-stories. Or maybe I was just being too analytical, as per usual. No answers here.
Fast Forward.
“OH MY GOD!” said the spaced-out Zach, as the drug took hold of him. He was sold. He loved the shit. He was OUT OF IT! Saying the most rediculous things I had ever heard. Rediculous? I would like to know when he was diculous for him to have repeated it here to become REdiculous. Wait, nevermind.
It seemed he had become a completely different person. Come to think of it, I was thinking like something else as well. Is it possible that you and your trip self are two separate entities within the same body? Look into this later.
Fast Forward.
We are in the girlfriend's car. Where were we going? Fuck my memories of this time. For the next two or three weeks we consumed Dex almost every other day. Bits and pieces are the only things that can be recovered from my damaged mind. We are most likely going to Jordan's house. The Girlfriend's best friend.
“Look how numb you are!” I scream before I reach over and slap Zach straight in the face, making a loud sound, shaking my core. He flipped out when he realized he couldn't feel anything and began hitting himself quite hard. His girlfriend watched in disbelief mixed with slight amusement.
“Check it out!” he yelled as he whacked her across the cheek while she was trying to drive. I lunged into the front seat and constrained the dumb fucker.
“OUCH, WHAT THE FUCK!” she yelped.
“NO!!! YOU CAN'T HIT PEOPLE WHO AREN'T TRIPPING, YOU DUMB ASS!” I barked. I was trying to stifle my laughter, at least until I found whether or not she was okay or not. She was. I laughed.
Fast Forward.
We are in the woods somewhere. All four of us. Jordan has huge tits. Pot on the mind and in the lungs. COLORS!
Rewind.
I close my eyes and I can see a ball on the end of a stick that comes up from the bottom of my vision. The ball is red and it is swaying from side to side along with the movements of the car and the inertia throwing me around. It feels like an orgasm, but in my head. I can't help but moan and laugh in a childlike manner. Everyone is entertained.
Fast Forward.
“Nice to MEAT youuuuu,” I say.
“Nice shirt,” Jordan says laughing. What kind of a greeting is this? Is she mocking me?
“What would you know about...” I heard myself saying, “something something something”
Fast Forward.
“MUSHROOMS!” she says, “MUSHROOMS”
“I CAN GET THOSE” ..I.. says.... “FOUR U”
“yes... something natural... sounds... bet... her... than whatever you're on...”
“what are you talking about now
>>>>>fast>>>>>forward>>>>>>further than before....
OH MY FUCKING GOD! MY ENTIRE VISION IS CHANGING COLORS.
BLUE.
PURPLE.
GREEN.
PINK.
EVERYTHING!
REWIND<<<<
I am watching some horrible movie. In this movie, I think I see myself following Zach down some stairs in the backyard of some girl – something to do with tits.
THE STAIRCASE:
He heads down the stairs and I hesitate at the top of the first step and stretch my foot out testing the strength of the bricks that make up this stair case that goes down forever into a very thick woods where I can also see a large tree that has fallen over (((((fast forward----I SLIP AND FALL ON MY ASS ON THIS FUCKING TREE!!!))))
I am still watching for some reason as I see myself follow my strange friend down this crazy set of stairs. We reach the bottom and I am on the edge of my seat to see what happens next in this strange film. Strange. SSSSSTRRRRAAAAAAAnnnnGE.
I see him sitting on the edge of a platform at the bottom of the stairs that over looks the great expanse of some TIT forest. THE GREAT TIT FOREST. He swings his arms and body back and forth like a puppet malfunctioning on a tangled string operated by a retarded puppet master.
I see myself standing there with my cell phone in my hand. WHO ARE YOU TEXTING the swaying beast asks of me. MY GIRLFRIEND, I say in a similar tone. WHY he asks. CUZ SHE'S MY GIRLFRIEND... OH....
Then it’s back up the stairs. I watch and laugh as I watch and laugh as I watch and laugh at my character, in the movie I am watching, trips over the top stair.
THIS MOVIE WILL NOT END as I am followed back into the basement of the house by way of the basement door that leads out to this insane little stair case and TIT FOREST. I turn to my left and have a lovely sit on a lovely seat. SCRUBS is on the television.
I LOVE THIS SHOW I scream to the room//at the two girls who are apparently watching the same mov
ie I am. I hope they are enjoying it more than I am, Cuz I don't get the point of it. Look harder. Hm... there's not much more to go on.
WANNA GO ON AN ADVENTURE? Zach asks me with his burning crazy eyes. YES I sigh. I follow the lumbering beast out the basement door that leads to the...... TIT FOREST. We, in the audience, aren't satisfied, we want more.
He heads down the stairs and I hesitate at the top of the first step and stretch my foot out testing the strength of the BRICKS that make up this staiR case that goes down FOREVER into a very thick woods where I can also see a large tree that has fallen over [[[[have I slipped yet?.....no..... not yet.....]]]
I am continuing to watch for some reason as I see myself follow my weird friend down this crazy set of stairs....THIS IS A FUCKING RE-RUN YOU ASS HOLE!!!!!!!! We reach the bottom and I am on the edge of my mind to see what happens next in this weird film. Weird. WwwwwwwwwwEEEEEIiiirRDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD.
I see him sitting on the edge of the platform at the bottom of a staircase that over looks the great expanse of BIG TIT forest. THE MASSIVE TIT FOREST. He swings his body and arms forth and back like a malfunctioning puppet on the tangled strings controlled by the midget puppet master.
I see myself standing there with my cellular device in my RIGHT hand. WHO ARE YOU TEXTING the swaying beast asks of me. MY FRIEND DEVON. I say in a tone similar to his. WHY he asks. CUZ SHE'S MY FRIEND... OH....
Then it’s back up the stairs. I watch and laugh in horror as I watch and laugh in glee as I watch and laugh in shock at my character in the movie that I am watching-- trips over the top stair. AGAIN??? how is this possible? ..........oh my god....... its another loop..........
THIS MOVIE WILL NOT STOP as I am followed back into the basement of the house by way of the basement door that leads out to this alien little stair case and TIT FOREST. I turn to my right (actually the left) and have a lovely seat on a lovely sit. SCRUBS is on the television.
I LOVE THIS SHOW I scream to the girls//at the two rooms who are apparently watching the same movie I am. Hope they are enjoying it MUCH more than I am. Cuz I don't get the point of it. Look harder. Hm... there's not much more to go on. REWIND THE TAPE AND WATCH IT AGAIN YOU DAFT PUNK!
WANNA GO ON AN ADVENTURE? Zach asks me with his burning crazy eyes. YES, I sigh. I follow the lumbering beast out the back, basement door that leads to the...... TIT FOREST. We in the audience aren't satisfied, we want more.
He heads down the stairs again and I once again hesitate at the top of the first step and stretch my foot out testing again the strength of the blocks that make up this stair case that goes down forever and again into a very thick woods where I can again see a large tree that has fallen over (((((maybe tomorrow you will fall on your ass....))))
I am still watching for some reason as I see myself follow my insane friend down this crazy set of stairs. We reach the bottom and I am on the edge of my seat to see what happens next in this insane film. Insane. IN-SSSSSSa@a@a@a@nNnNnnnn€.
I see him sitting on the edge of a platform at the bottom of the stairs that overlooks the great expanse of a forest with large tits. THE FOREST OF LARGE TITS. He swings his arms and body back and forth like a fully functioning puppet on puppet master a operated tangled string by a retarded.
I don't see myself standing there with my cell phone in my hand...oh wait yes I do. WHO ARE YOU TEXTING the swaying robot asks of me. MY GIRLFRIEND, I say in a completely different tone. WHY, he asks. CUZ SHE'S A BITCH... OH....
Then it’s back up the stairs. I watch and he/i trips over the top stair.
THIS MOVIE WILL NOT END as I am followed back into the basement of the house by way of the basement door that leads out to this irresponsible little staircase and TIT FOREST. I turn to my left and have a lovely shit on a lovely shit. SCRUBS is on the tele.
I LOVE THIS SHOW the room//the two girls. Hope they are enjoying it at least as much as I am. Cuz I don't care what the point of it IS. DO IT AGAIN!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
WANNA GO ON AN ADVENTURE? Zach asks me [in the movie, of course] with his burning and crazy eyes. YES, I sigh with relief. I thought he would never ask. I follow the lumbering beast out the back, basement door that leads to the...... TIT FOREST. We in the audience aren't satisfied, we must have more.
down the stairs/testing the strength/large tree that has fallen over.
I/reach the bottom /what happens next in this %^&^$ film. &^%^%$^%. ^$^$^&*&^*%^%&%$%$%^&^%&^$^%^.
edge of a platform/TIT forest. THE GREAT TIT FOREST. swings his arms and body back and forth/retarded puppet master.
rotary phone/WHO ARE YOU TEXTING/MY GIRLFRIEND/WHY/CUZ SHE'S MY GIRLFRIEND/OH....
back up the stairs/trips over the top stair.
lovely sit on a lovely seat. SCRUBS is on the tele.
I LOVE THIS SHOW/room//two girls/enjoying it more than I am/more to go on?
WANNA GO ON AN ADVENTURE? /YES I sigh/TIT FOREST. We in the audience aren't satisfied, we NEED more.
stairs/strength/tree
&^%^%$^%. ^^^^^&*&^*%^%&%%%%%^&^%&^%^%^.
retardedpuppetmaster.
WHOTEXTING/GIRLFRIEND./WHY/MYGIRLFRIEND/OH....
upstairs/trip
lovelySCRUBS is on.
LOVE THIS SHOW/room//girls/I am/to go on?
ADVENTURE?/YES/TIT FOREST. The audience is blank.
_I
will
never
get
out
of
this
loop.
the audience....myself...
I
know
that
this
will
never
end.
me...
@
$
*
&
^
%
€
?
nine
GODDAMN
TIMES
fastforward>>>>>>>
look james, I’m a pop-up tent
[he says. he is crouching on the ground
then jumps to an open armed,
spread legged,
standing position]
fast forward.
Two weeks have passed.
I have nothing to show for it.
I am bored of these dumb games.
Counting steps between slapping
the walls till they flash green.
We need something else.
SOMEONE else.
Please.
james ---- the victim ----
what did I do wrong?
I was stuck on my bed which I moved into my living room.
I couldn't stop watching Six Feet Under.
I would go to work, come home, jerk off, and eat junk food.
I was losing it.
I was lost.
Kristal was working at CiCi's Pizza Buffet.
Kristal was talking to another guy.
I was sure of it.
She wouldn't let me see her phone.
And when she finally did, she had cleared the call history
and all her texts.
She was cheating on me.
With that Gary fuck, probably.
She took him home from work,
because he got a DUI or something.
I broke up with her, because she refused to answer my calls.
She was on the phone with Gary.
I was the bad boyfriend in that conversation.
I was no longer the one she would always love – no matter what.
I was no longer the one she would marry and have kids with.
She was no longer the one I would die for.
But some part of me did die.
I'll get it back.
That feeling.
That girl.
My girl.
I knew Gary from school.
He hung out with the druggies.
I would become a druggy.
I would infiltrate their world.
And keep close to this Gary character.
I would win back my Kristal.
I fucked up.
Chapter 10
What's Left to Say?
The Chapter of
Kristal & [Gary]
“The edges are visible as time is distorted.
This is the end as far as I can tell.
Doing what is best for the colors.
Hitler killed as did sirhan sirhan,
so much violence is wrong for a society to exist.
Paranoia ruins the whole experience
as the mind warps back and forth
and back and forth.
What they don’t know is that I know them
and they know you
everyone seems fine to me from rooftops.
I'm taken back to the edges.