by Martha Carr
All Dwarf’ed Up
Dwarf Bounty Hunter™ Book Three
Martha Carr
Michael Anderle
This book is a work of fiction. All of the characters, organizations, and events portrayed in this novel are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Sometimes both.
Copyright © LMBPN Publishing
Cover Art by Jake @ J Caleb Design
http://jcalebdesign.com / [email protected]
Cover copyright © LMBPN Publishing
A Michael Anderle Production
LMBPN Publishing supports the right to free expression and the value of copyright. The purpose of copyright is to encourage writers and artists to produce the creative works that enrich our culture.
The distribution of this book without permission is a theft of the author’s intellectual property. If you would like permission to use material from the book (other than for review purposes), please contact [email protected]. Thank you for your support of the author’s rights.
LMBPN Publishing
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Las Vegas, NV 89109
First Version, December 2020
ebook ISBN: 978-1-64971-344-5
Paperback ISBN: 978-1-64971-345-2
The Oriceran Universe (and what happens within / characters / situations / worlds) are Copyright (c) 2017-2020 by Martha Carr and LMBPN Publishing.
Contents
The All Dwarf’ed Up Team
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Free Books
Author Notes - Martha Carr
Author Notes - Michael Anderle
Connect with The Authors
Also by Martha Carr
Other LMBPN Publishing Books
The All Dwarf’ed Up Team
Thanks to our JIT Team:
Dave Hicks
Allen Collins
Diane L. Smith
Jackey Hankard-Brodie
Thomas Ogden
Deb Mader
Dorothy Lloyd
Peter Manis
Kelly O’Donnell
J.R. Caplan
Paul Westman
If I’ve missed anyone, please let me know!
Editor
SkyHunter Editing Team
Chapter One
“Before this ceremony draws to a close, please join me once more to thank our generous benefactors. Ms. Leira Berens, Mr. James Brownstone, and Mr. Johnny Walker.”
The field outside the main building filled with applause. Most of the enthusiasm came from the adults who stood around the perimeter of the neat rows of chairs on the grass. The kids—ranging in age from eleven to seventeen—clapped politely enough, but none of them looked particularly enthusiastic. That might have been because of the heat, however.
Johnny stood beside the podium with his arms folded and studied the witch behind the microphone. Generous benefactors, huh? I wonder if anyone told her who this land belongs to. And the buildings. And the supplies.
On the other side of Mr. Brownstone, Leira leaned forward to look past the hulking wall of muscle and met Johnny’s gaze. “It has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?”
He snorted and muttered through the dying applause, “Just ’cause she said your name first.”
The witch at the podium—Glasket, he thought her name was—continued her drawn-out conclusion to the opening ceremony.
Brownstone’s short laugh came out more like a grunt. “Are you worried about your reputation, Walker?”
The dwarf craned his neck to look at the other Level-Six bounty hunter and wrinkled his nose. “How many times have I gotta tell you how to say my name?”
“More than once, it would seem.”
Leira darted them both a crooked smile and shook her head.
The man nodded and scanned the rows of students seated on the chairs on the lawn. “I think we did okay.”
“The best part is that we get to leave after this and let the drill sergeants do their jobs,” he responded brusquely.
“They’re teachers, Johnny,” Leira said.
The dwarf circled his finger in the air and glanced around the grounds. “Does this look like a regular school to you?”
“You said Quantico for magical kids.” Brownstone shrugged. “I’d say that fits the bill.”
“Trainers, then.” He leaned sideways to look around the huge man beside him and jerked his chin at Leira. “Does that tickle your fancy the right way, darlin’?”
She raised her eyebrows in warning. “What was that?”
Johnny raised both hands. “Sorry. Force of habit, Ms. Berens.”
The woman looked away from him to study the compound and its buildings that, while sparsely decorated, fitted their purpose perfectly. “Trainers works for me.”
“Right.” Johnny sniffed and scratched the side of his face under his wiry red beard. “Then we let the trainers do the trainin’ And I can get back to my cabin.”
“To do what?” Brownstone asked and glanced at the dwarf from the corner of his eye.
“To do…” He scoffed. “You been down here a month and you’re tellin’ me you ain’t—”
“And with that,” Ms. Glasket pronounced and clapped briskly, “you’re all expected to meet in your assigned dorms in an hour for a more thorough orientation. Until then, help yourselves to refreshments. You’ll find those in the tent beside the martial arts building. They include everything you’ll come to know and enjoy about Southern cooking, I’ve been told.” The witch grinned and spread her arms effusively. “Welcome to the Academy of Necessary Magic.”
The full headcount of a hundred and seven students bounded from their chairs immediately. The trainers stayed to applaud Ms. Glasket’s speech. Low conversation filled the lawn as the kids hurried toward the refreshments tent, which had been fitted with mist fans to help stave off the sweltering July heat.
Johnny thumped the back of his hand against Brownstone’s arm beneath the leather duster. “And that’s our cue. Nice knowin’ ya both.”
The giant man snorted and glanced at his arm before looked up slowly to watch the dwarf walk away.
“I don’t know about you,” Leira said and gave him a cursory study, “but I need something cold. Aren’t you hot in that?”
“Nope.”
“Huh.” She left it at that and strode across the lawn toward the refreshments tent. Brownstone remained where he was, content to simply enjoy their joint accomplishment for a few moments.
“Johnny! Hey.” Doc Leahy walked briskly across the field toward the dwarf.
The bounty hunter turned and widened his eyes when he saw the usually reserved doc in a pair of Bermuda shorts, a Hawaiian t-shirt, and Berkinstock sandals approaching. The man’s unruly gray mop of hair had been tied in a ponytail. Johnny’s nose twitched as he scratched his face again and let the man catch up. “I didn’t recognize ya, Doc.”
&
nbsp; “Oh.” The man glanced at his outfit with a self-conscious smile. “Well…it’s not my usual style, I’ll admit. But when in Rome—”
“This ain’t Rome. It’s the Everglades.”
The man held a laugh back. “Yes, I’m fully aware of that, Johnny.”
“Do you see anyone else ʼround here dressed like that?”
“No, but—”
“You look like a tourist.” He folded his arms and snorted a laugh.
“Because I am.” The doc swatted at a swarm of gnats buzzing past and chuckled. “I gave myself two days off and made the trip from LA to see for myself what the three of you managed to pull together. And yes, now that I’ve seen it, I’m heading to Miami for the night to be a tourist.”
“Yeah, you’ll fit in fine on the other side of the state. Does everything meet your expectations?”
“The academy? Very much so.” The man turned to look over his shoulder at the now empty chairs and podium and the crowd of students and trainers who descended on the tent. “I suppose congratulations on your newest endeavor are in order, especially with such a fast turnaround. All this in a month.”
“When you have the money and know the right folks, it’s simple.”
“Indeed. I wanted to thank you personally too, Johnny. For offering your land and funding the project.”
The dwarf nodded toward Brownstone, who still stood motionlessly beside the podium with his arms folded. “I didn’t do it all on my lonesome, that’s for damn sure.”
“No, I know. Leira and Mr. Brownstone bring their unique outlook to every…project.”
“Huh. You don’t say.”
Doc smiled. “So what’s next for you?”
“Me? I’m goin’ home, Doc. Enjoy your trip.” He nodded at the wizard and turned toward the dirt road leading away from the compound. The academy, now. It’s one of the weirder things I own but it’s for a good cause. These kids will learn everything they need to know about breakin’ the rules and gettin’ paid for it.
That thought made him chuckle before he stuck two fingers in his mouth for a loud, piercing whistle. “Rex! Luther! Time to get on, boys.”
Splashing and panting rose from the thick, draped foliage hanging over the swamp beside the dirt road. His two black-and-tan coonhounds bounded through the reeds, dripping muddy water and covered in soggy leaves and pieces of grass. They raced toward him and skidded to a stop when he snapped his fingers.
“What’s wrong, Johnny?” Luther’s tail wagged furiously and flung water everywhere.
“Yeah, if we’re goin’ home, let’s go home.” Rex’s head nodded up and down as he turned toward the field and sniffed. “But we shouldn’t. I smell catfish.”
“Oooh! Johnny, please—”
“We ain’t stayin’, boys. The work’s done so we’re goin’ home.”
“Then why are we—” Luther shook himself vigorously from head to toe and flung mud, water, and reeds all over the road and his brother.
Rex couldn’t help but do the same, then both hounds flicked their tails and panted as they stared at their master.
“That.” Johnny pointed at them. “That’s why we stopped in the middle of the road.”
“We can’t help it, Johnny,” Rex said and twisted his neck to nip at something in the fur along his back. “It’s like all you two-legs with yawning. You see another hound do it, you simply—”
“Can’t help yourself,” Luther finished and mirrored his brother’s turn to nibble at his rear hip.
The dwarf snorted and nodded down the road to where he’d parked Sheila. “And now it’s over.”
“Johnny!” Amanda waved her hands as she ran toward them across the lawn. “Wait!”
“Hey, look.” Luther’s tail thumped against his brother’s rear end before Rex finally stepped away. “It’s the pup.”
“Hey, pup.” Rex yipped at the girl as she slowed to a walk and caught her breath as she reached them. “Are you ready to go?”
The girl tossed her dark hair out of her eyes and stared at Johnny. “Are you leaving already?”
He sniffed. “I have no other reason to be here.”
She looked over her shoulder and laughed. “You do know Darlene’s in that tent handing out catfish left and right, don’t you?”
“I knew it.” Rex licked his muzzle. “Johnny…”
The dwarf snapped his fingers again and lifted an index finger without looking away from his ward. Both hounds sat instantly with short whines of disappointment. After a moment, he nodded. “I’m the one who asked her to feed everyone, kid.”
“And you’re passing up on her food.” She folded her arms. “Are you feeling okay?”
“It’s the atmosphere. Somethin’ about eatin’ in her trailer and not in a tent makes a whole world of appetizin’ difference.” Plus, the trailer’s not full of juvenile delinquents who only know how to fight and run. “Go ahead and have one for me too, though, yeah?”
“Okay.” Amanda’s smile faded as they stood in the road. “So this is it then, huh?”
Johnny nodded and rubbed his mouth before he tugged on the ends of his scraggly red beard. “This ain’t goodbye, kid. Only a see ya later. I reckon they’ll let you out on leave a couple of times a year—”
“On leave?” The girl scrunched her face up with a chuckle. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Break. I meant break.” He cleared his throat. “You know, come on back to the cabin and stay a few nights. Only if…I mean only if you want to.”
“Why wouldn’t I wanna come home for break?”
Home. That one word put a hard lump in the bounty hunter’s throat, and if he’d looked at his hounds in that moment, he would’ve seen their eyebrows moving up and down like his as he tried to yank his emotions under control. He grunted. “No reason. All I’m sayin’ is you know how to make your own choices. So if you end up takin’ a likin’ to this place and don’t wanna leave when you’re able, I won’t take it personally.”
Amanda grinned. “I’ll come home for break. I’m not sure exactly when that is, though…” She turned again to scan the compound. “I have a feeling this isn’t exactly like normal schools that way either.”
Johnny responded with a gruff chuckle. “What makes you say that?”
“Well, the buildings kinda make it look like a prison, and I heard some of the teachers talking about how all the other kids here were the ‘magical rejects’ of LA—”
“They said that out in the open for anyone to hear?” He glared at the trainers scattered in conversation on the lawn while the students raced here and there and shouted at each other as they simply let off steam on their first day of “school.” “Who the fuck was it? That ain’t part of the—”
“Johnny.”
“—lesson plan. That Light Elf told me they were—”
“Johnny.” Amanda leaned toward him and raised her eyebrows, smiling broadly. “Shifter hearing. Remember?”
He glanced at her and narrowed his eyes.
“Whoops.” Rex panted heavily beside his brother and glanced from his master to the girl who’d been with them in the swamps for the last two months. “It’s a big thing to forget, Johnny.”
“Yeah, the pup can hear almost as good as we can,” Luther added.
“Well, bro.” Rex snorted. “Almost as well as we can.”
“Yeah, that’s what I said.”
The dwarf gritted his teeth and forced himself to breathe slowly and evenly to bring his unwarranted frustration under control. Fortunately, Amanda didn’t encourage the hounds with a comment of her own.
“They’re very nice, Johnny.” She nodded. “The teachers, I mean. One of them helped me carry everything to my room and asked me all about what it was like living with you.”
“Huh.” He cocked his head. “What did you say?”
She shrugged. “That I love it. Come on. You let me take the airboat out whenever I want, you bought me a phone, and I get to run around with the two best coon
hounds in the Everglades.”
“And that’s it?”
“Well…I maybe said a few things about how you taught me to clean guns and shoot and tie up wild pigs and fire a crossbow—oh, and that one time when you took me out to throw grenades—”
“Jesus.” He rolled his eyes.
“But that’s it, Johnny. I didn’t say a thing about your work or anything. That’s all secret stuff, right?”
The dwarf nodded slowly and pressed his lips together so hard that they almost disappeared beneath his wiry red mustache. “Well, it would be if the staff here had no idea who I was or what I do for a livin’.”
“Oh. Okay, so it’s no big deal.”
“How ʼbout you keep that kinda thing to yourself from here on out, huh? Focus on what they’re teachin’ you instead.”
Amanda frowned. “Why?”
He shrugged. “I reckon it might make the other kids feel a little…behind.”
She burst out laughing. “Johnny, those kids were living in LA. Underground.”
“Not with a bounty hunter and two coonhounds. It ain’t the same.”
“Okay. Fine. I won’t introduce myself and say, ‘Hi, I’m Amanda, Johnny Walker’s shifter kid. He taught me everything he knows.’”
Johnny Walker’s kid. He wanted to storm away, climb into Sheila, and rip the goddamn Band-Aid off then and there. Instead, he merely grunted. “If I taught you everythin’ I know, kid, you wouldn’t be here.”