All Dwarf'ed Up (Dwarf Bounty Hunter Book 3)

Home > Other > All Dwarf'ed Up (Dwarf Bounty Hunter Book 3) > Page 9
All Dwarf'ed Up (Dwarf Bounty Hunter Book 3) Page 9

by Martha Carr


  “I’m gonna stop you right there and save us both from what’s bound to make this an even more awkward conversation.”

  He raised an eyebrow. “This your definition of awkward?”

  “Well now.” Lucy tucked her hair behind one ear and continued to regard him with a somewhat bemused expression. “You’re a little brusque sometimes. You know, with no filter whatsoever. At least you were.”

  “Shit, I ain’t changed that much in fifteen years.”

  “Yeah, I know.” The wind chimes hanging above the front door tinkled again when a new customer stepped inside, and Lucy looked up briefly to nod a greeting at the newcomer. “I have a hard time picturing you wanting to buy anything in here. Although you did seem interested in that geode.”

  “That was a rock.” He pointed at her and sniffed. “And I ain’t here to buy. I was…hopin’ you might have a few minutes for a chat.”

  “Right now?”

  “Mm-hmm.”

  She hesitated and looked around her shop. “Yeah. Jolene should be finished with her lunch break soon. I’ll put her behind the counter and we can go sit in the lounge.”

  “You have a lounge here?”

  With a smirk, she moved down the counter as her new customer approached. “Not the kind you’re thinking of.” She looked at the woman and smiled broadly to welcome her. “How can I help you?”

  “Yeah, hi. I’m looking for astral projection.”

  Johnny sniggered and his gaze traveled over her, taking in her baggy pants—or was it a skirt?—all the bangles that clinked and jingled on her wrists, multiple rings on every finger, and her glassy, reddened eyes. She should be lookin’ for a reality check instead.

  “Oh, it’s across there on the bookshelf marked Beyond the Self. If you need any help with something specific, let me know.”

  “Thank you.” The customer spun away briskly and seemed to almost float as she walked across the shop. Her jewelry jingled with every step, which brought Rex and Luther racing toward her from the back of the shop, yipping excitedly.

  “What is that?”

  “Johnny, something’s coming.”

  “Whoa. Look at that two-leg. Hey, Rex. Think I could push her over on the first try?”

  “Bet you could stare at her and she’d fall. That lady needs help.”

  Luther wagged his tail furiously as the over-accessorized woman passed them and ignored both hounds completely. “Yeah, I’m gonna try.”

  Johnny snapped his fingers and they whipped their heads toward him. “To me, boys.”

  “Johnny, what’s that lady doing walking like that?”

  “She must’ve sat on a cactus or something. Ooh, or a porcupine.”

  “Y’all stay close, ya hear? I can’t have you sniffin’ ʼround underfoot and trippin’ up these…folks.”

  Lucy leaned over the counter. “Aw, you brought your dogs?”

  “Is that a problem?”

  “Are you kidding? We love dogs here.” She stepped around the counter and dropped to one knee. The hounds forgot all about Johnny’s order and padded toward her while their tails wagged wildly. They practically threw themselves at her to get a good petting. “And you can tell, can’t you? Yes, you can. Look at you, you sweet little doggie—”

  “All right, they ain’t babies, now. Don’t talk to ʼem like that.”

  “Johnny, we love it!”

  “Yeah, we’ll be babies for this lady any day.”

  Lucy finished petting them, stood, and brushed her hands off. “They’re sweet.”

  He glanced at the dogs, who gazed adoringly at the shop owner. “Only when I want ʼem to be.”

  “Very funny.” She gave him a playfully disapproving glance that faded when the door behind the counter opened. “Oh, Jolene. Would you mind watching the counter for me?”

  The incredibly pale Jolene scratched her head, exposed a fully unshaved armpit, and studied Johnny with a coy smile. “No problem.”

  “Thank you. We’ll be in the back.”

  “Uh-huh.” She stepped slowly behind the counter and her gaze remained fixed on the bounty hunter.

  “Right this way.” Lucy gestured toward the back and moved through the clothes racks and the oddly arranged tables of merchandise.

  I can’t believe folks pay for this stuff.

  He found Lisa at the Do It Yourself Witchcraft station and cleared his throat. When she looked at him, he nodded toward the back and ignored the uncomfortable sensation as Jolene’s intense gaze practically crawled all over him.

  A quick chat. Yeah. It had better be.

  Chapter Ten

  Johnny squirmed in the rattan chair at the back of the shop. Lucy and Lisa both watched him silently as he grunted and tried to find a comfortable position, but the chair’s curved padding kept sliding away from him in all the wrong places. “Who the hell in their right mind thinks this is a decent way to kick back and take a load off?”

  Lucy raised her eyebrows. “You’re welcome to choose another seat.”

  “Yep.” Johnny sprang from the chair, which wobbled on its base and almost toppled before he caught it. “The damn thing’s a liability.”

  “How about the pouf?”

  “Say what now?” He stared at her with wide eyes.

  Lisa cleared her throat with a small smile and patted the huge round cushion beside the stack of pillows she’d chosen. “Otherwise known as an ottoman.”

  “I know what a damn ottoman is.” He slumped heavily on the cushion and grunted as a painful jolt raced up his spine. “I thought it’d be softer.”

  “Well, that one’s so firm because it helps the energetic alignment…” Lucy paused with her mouth hanging open and shut it abruptly. “And you have absolutely no interest in that. Which is fine.”

  “And you do?” The bounty hunter watched her warily as she lifted the lid of the teapot on the low table beside her and leaned closer to sniff the steam.

  “I’ve found something I can align my beliefs with, yeah. Don’t worry, Johnny. I’m not about to preach personal enlightenment to you.” She chuckled and opened a small leather pouch, the contents of which she sprinkled in a circle around the teapot and three small cups on the table.

  “What are you doing?”

  “This? It’s a little cleansing ritual I like to perform.”

  “Hey, Johnny.” Luther approached his master and sniggered as his tail thumped against the abandoned rattan chair. “Betcha that’ll clear your constipation right up.”

  Lying on the floor at Lucy’s feet, Rex laughed. “Cleansing. Good one.”

  He lowered his fist at his side, and Luther lay obediently at his feet. “What’s that for, huh?”

  “Johnny.” Lisa wrinkled her nose and shook her head a fraction of an inch.

  He sniffed and stared at the sprinkled whatever it was. “’Cause I ain’t fixin’ to get poisoned. Not again. Not today.”

  Lucy muttered something under her breath, her eyes closed as she spread her hands over the tea-table. When she was finished, she turned toward him with a warm smile. “Sorry. What was that?”

  “Nothin’.” The dwarf shifted uncomfortably on the hard ottoman, crossed one leg over the other, and tried to lean back, then gave up when he remembered there was nothing to support him. “I didn’t realize you were one of them humans tryin’ to cast their own spells.”

  “It’s only a ritual, Johnny.” Lucy poured them each a cup of tea. “Magic doesn’t have to be actual spells and illusions and…flying creatures for it to exist. Although that’s one of its forms.”

  “Huh. It’s the only form I know.”

  “And that’s simply the way you choose to look at it.” She offered him the first cup of tea but he shook his head and jerked his thumb toward Lisa. “Go ahead and let her take the first one.”

  The agent scoffed. “Will you let me take the first sip too to see whether I live or die?”

  He smirked, but his expression remained a little wary. “Maybe.”

&n
bsp; She took the cup from Lucy and laughed. “You’re being paranoid.”

  “No, I ain’t. I reckon you never been poisoned before, darlin’. Lemme tell ya, that’ll make anyone think twice ʼbout acceptin’ weird ritual…whatever from strangers.”

  “Not anyone,” Rex muttered and stared lovingly at the shop owner. “Luther’s too stupid to keep eating those mushrooms down the road.”

  “No, I’m not. They’re delicious.”

  Lisa made a big show of slurping her tea and sighed contently afterward. “Ah. That’s good. I can’t even taste the poison.”

  Lucy choked back a laugh, and the women shared an amused glance.

  “That ain’t funny.”

  His partner lifted the teacup to her lips again and grinned. “No, it truly is.”

  When Lucy offered him another cup, he took it hesitantly, sniffed the steam rising from it, and placed it on the floor beside him. “I’ll get ʼround to it.”

  “Okay. Oh, I’m sorry.” Lucy gestured toward Agent Breyer. “We haven’t officially been introduced, right?”

  “Huh.” Johnny sniffed and waved a hand in Lisa’s general direction. “Lisa Breyer. She’s my—”

  “I’m his partner.” She grinned. “Still fairly new.”

  Goddammit, we need to find a better word.

  “Well, it’s nice to meet you.” Lucy leaned in her chair that looked like a regular armchair but with the legs sawed off. She glanced at each of her guests as her smile widened. “That’s great, Johnny. I mean yes, it’s a wonderful surprise to see you after…so long. But it’s especially good to see you so happy. You know, that you were able to move on and find someone to share your life with again.”

  “What?” He gaped at her and from the corner of his eye, he saw Lisa turn away to sip more of her tea. “Not that kinda partner, darlin’. Sorry to burst your peace-and-love bubble.”

  “Oh.” Lucy set her teacup down and frowned. “But she said—”

  “I’m on a case.”

  A laugh of realization escaped her, and she shook her head. “I’m sorry. I merely assumed—”

  “Trust me,” Lisa interjected. “It’s hard enough to crack him open when it comes to working together.”

  “Well, don’t give up hope, Johnny.” The young woman nodded. “There’s enough love out there for everyone. You merely have to open yourself up to receive it.”

  Johnny shifted again on the ottoman and cleared his throat. “I ain’t here for love advice or to drink tea potions or get my future spouted at me from a deck of playin’ cards. Got it?”

  Lucy nodded and winked at him. “Got it.”

  Not a cult, my ass. We’re sittin’ in one.

  “You said you’re on a case?” their hostess asked after a short silence.

  “Yep.”

  Lucy took a small sip of her tea and held the cup at chest level with both hands. “I thought you were retired.”

  Johnny sniffed. “Now how’d you hear ʼbout that?”

  “Well, after…everything happened, the investigation seemed to simply stop without warning. When we didn’t hear from you at all, we assumed you’d withdrawn—which is completely normal and valid, by the way, and I’m not here to pass judgment on your personal choices.”

  Lisa tilted her head to stare at him. “What investigation?”

  “I’m not goin’ there.” He stared at Lucy. I’m only workin’ on a case from the past. I don’t need the whole damn thing catchin’ up with me. “Listen, Lucy. We’re here for an active case, sure. But I came to talk to you about Dawn.”

  The woman’s eyelids fluttered and she set her teacup down again. “Oh.”

  “Now, I reckon you weren’t expectin’ that but I’d appreciate anythin’ you might have to tell me.”

  “Um…sure.” She looked shell-shocked as she leaned back in the leg-less armchair. “But it’s been a long time, Johnny. I suppose it doesn’t matter anymore, right? After fifteen years? Dad passed about four years ago, and Mom flew off to start over in a different country. So it’s only me and I’m free to say whatever I want.”

  He tilted his chin and studied her curiously. “What do you mean it don’t matter anymore?”

  “Oh, only that… You know. We never talked about what happened. Not much, anyway. As a family.”

  “Well, sure. I get that.” He rubbed his mouth and beard and took a deep breath. “Do you remember anythin’ about the statement you gave to the police that night? What you said, what questions they asked, any of that?”

  “Yeah…” Lucy rubbed her forehead. “I told them everything I knew. That we were on our school trip. We’d had a great day in Central Park and went back to the hotel. Dawn and I were sharing a room. A group of the other kids went into someone else’s room to watch this stupid show together after dinner. She said she was tired and wanted to go to bed early, and I…well, I assumed that was where she was going.”

  “And that’s it?” He leaned over his lap and tried not to frown too deeply. “Do you remember anythin’ else? Anyone actin’ off or followin’ y’all, maybe?”

  “No, nothing like that. The police got everything I knew.” Lucy glanced at her hands clasped in her lap and a slow flush rose in her cheeks. “That night.”

  The dwarf nodded slowly. “I have a hunch you ain’t said much of what happened after that night.”

  She shook her head slowly.

  “If there was ever a time to start talkin’ ‘bout it, darlin’, that’d be now.”

  “I know.” She sighed heavily. “It was a few months after that. My dad had started to go downhill. He wasn’t ever the bravest guy or the type to stand up for himself and carry the family with his confidence, you know?”

  “Sure. That was more your mama’s part.”

  “Right. But after—” Lucy stopped and chuckled when Luther butted his nose against her calf. “Hey, buddy.”

  “Johnny, you think she has any snacks?”

  The dwarf snapped his fingers. “Not now, boys.”

  “I can’t even tell,” Rex added as he sniffed the perimeter of the “lounge” while his tail wagged furiously. “I think this place burned my nose out. All I smell is…too much of everything and nothing.”

  “It’s on her too.” Luther stuck his muzzle into the crook of Lucy’s bent knee, and the woman chuckled.

  “I know what you want.” The woman leaned over the side of her armchair to open a small silver box shaped like a treasure chest. When she turned again, she held out both fists. “Do you guys know how to sit?”

  “Do we know how?” Luther sat immediately and gazed at her.

  “Lady, you’re looking at two hounds who were born to sit.” Rex trotted toward her and sat beside his brother. “It depends on what we get out of it.”

  “What are you doin’?” Johnny grumbled.

  Lucy smiled at him. “You have two exceptionally good dogs, Johnny.”

  “I know that. What are you doin’?”

  “Is it okay if I give them a treat?”

  The dwarf scowled and shook his head. “No, it ain’t. Absolutely not. No one feeds my hounds.” He snapped his fingers, opened his hand, and stood from the ottoman as he reached toward her. “Gimme that.”

  “Oh. Okay.” She dropped the treats into his hand and shrugged. Both hounds craned their necks to watch the exchange and stared hopefully at the tidbits they couldn’t even see. “Most people don’t mind.”

  “Well, I ain’t most people.”

  “Aw, come on, Johnny.” Rex licked his muzzle.

  “Yeah, what gives?” Luther uttered a high-pitched whine. “The lady with hound treats can’t give the hounds the actual treats? Something’s wrong with you.”

  “We’ve been good, Johnny.”

  “We’ll be better.”

  “Come on, come on, come on.”

  Johnny sniffed what looked like two Milk-Bone treats, leaned away, and looked slowly at the hounds’ huge, pleading eyes. “Catch.”

  He tossed both trea
ts, which were caught by two slobbering, eager mouths without hesitation.

  “Yes! Johnny, you just redeemed yourself.”

  “They don’t make ʼem better than you, Johnny.” Rex and Luther sniffed the floor, looking for more, and he shook his head.

  “Tasty, right?” Lucy laughed as the hounds returned to her and sniffed vigorously for more. “I think you’re good with only one. Don’t worry, Johnny. They’re made with organic, local, sustainably-sourced ingredients. Free-range too, as far as the meat goes.”

  “Meat?” Luther whipped his head up to look at him.

  Rex immediately did the same. “Where?”

  “What?” Johnny asked.

  “The dog treats.” Lucy grinned at him. “There’s a local company who sells these at the Farmer’s Market too and they—”

  “All right, all right. Dog treats. I don’t need to know where every speck of it came from.” The dwarf gestured impatiently. We won’t get outta here if I let her gush ʼbout organic dog-treat farms. Jesus. “You were talkin’ ʼbout your old man.”

  Her smile faded, and she glanced briefly at Lisa.

  “It’s okay,” the agent said gently. “Anything you can remember is helpful.”

  The bounty hunter raised an eyebrow at her but she ignored him and nodded encouragingly at the shop owner.

  “Right.” With a deep breath, Lucy leaned back in her chair. “Dad wasn’t himself for months afterward. I think it was almost a year, or maybe a little more. Mom and I started to worry. Honestly, we thought he was sick—you know, like some kind of illness—until he sat us down together and told us way more than we already knew. He said he had to get it off his chest or it would kill him.”

  With a grunt, Johnny gestured for her to continue.

  “In a nutshell, he said he’d been in considerable trouble,” Lucy continued. “Things like illegal gambling and owing tons of money, and that he’d ended up selling drugs on the side to maintain his gambling habit. He’d been investigated by the FBI, and they’d contacted him about his involvement in everything. It was the weirdest conversation. He completely fell apart and two weeks later, we packed up and moved from Georgia to Wisconsin, of all places. He said it was to get away from all the trouble he’d landed in—that he didn’t want to keep reliving all the awful things he’d done by staying in Atlanta. And he didn’t want to endanger Mom and me anymore so we went with him, and he completely turned his life around. I think before he passed…Johnny, I think he’d finally managed to move on and be happy. So I’m grateful for that, at least.”

 

‹ Prev