by Martha Carr
The hounds trotted along beside him. “We’re going underground, Johnny?”
Rex sniffed at a stray cheeseburger wrapper blown down the sidewalk toward them. “You know how many critters live underground? Even in tunnels?”
“Yeah, lots.”
“Rats.”
“Moles.”
“Mice.”
“Hamsters.”
“Hush up,” Johnny muttered and peered hastily over his shoulder at Lisa. She’d stopped on the sidewalk to scroll through her phone and didn’t seem to have heard him. If these hounds keep up all this talk, I’m bound to let slip more than I can cover up as talkin’ to myself.
“You don’t want us to go after the hamsters, Johnny?” Luther looked at where he expected Johnny to be, then realized his master had also stopped on the sidewalk. “Johnny?”
Rex trotted toward the dwarf and sat, his tongue lolling from his mouth. “Yeah, I thought that was one of your biggest reasons for coming here.”
He ignored them and studied Agent Breyer. “Is somethin’ holdin’ you up, darlin’?”
“What?” She looked at him, then glanced at her phone again before she hurried to catch up. “I’m looking at the Shanghai Tunnel tours. We missed the last one by about half an hour.”
“Is that the last of the day?”
“Yep. Five o’clock. They are open tomorrow and slots are still available.”
The dwarf nodded. “Then that’s the one we’ll take. Last stop on a Friday night. I ain’t goin’ down in them tunnels without recreatin’ exactly how the McKinney sisters did it.”
Her knowing smile widened and she inclined her head to fix him with a teasing look. “So do you want to take me to Chinese for dinner and hop a few bars after this tunnel tour?”
He scratched his head. “I didn’t say that.”
“Well, if we’re recreating it—”
“Yeah, well, we ain’t sisters, neither. Get us a place on the tour tomorrow, darlin’. We’ll decide on the rest from there.”
She smirked and returned her attention to her phone. “Done and done.”
“Good.” Johnny cleared his throat and glanced at the hounds. Rex stared across the street at a group of adults in tight, dark clothing who kicked a hacky sac around in front of a headshop. Luther was busy licking between his legs.
“So now what?” Lisa stashed her phone in her pocket and glanced around the street. “We have the rest of the night to do whatever we want.”
“Uh-huh. And I know exactly how to fill the time.” He strode away without looking at her.
Laughing, she hurried after him and caught up before he turned the corner. “Well, I certainly didn’t expect that.”
“What?”
“Johnny, for someone who’s so adamant about not enjoying his time in Portland, you look like a bounty hunter on a mission.”
He snorted. “I took the case, didn’t I?”
“Hey, Johnny,” Rex called. “What do you think—Johnny? Shit.”
“Johnny, where’d you go?” Luther howled. “Johnny!”
The dwarf whistled and both hounds darted around the corner after him.
“You can’t leave us on the street like that. What gives?”
“Whew. We were this close to being lost dogs.”
He glanced down at them and grumbled, “Y’all need to pay attention.”
“You can count on us, Johnny.”
“Yeah, we’re sharp as sticks.”
Lisa smiled at the hounds and shook her head. “And now you’re the one with a plan to fill our time while we wait for that last tour tomorrow.” She turned to study the mural of a lady with a rabbit mask beside them. “So spill it. Where are we going?”
“Park and Salmon.”
Her smile faded. “The drug dealer’s location? Seriously?”
“You sound disappointed.”
“No…uh, I merely thought you had something fun in mind.”
The dwarf chuckled. “Shakin’ a drug dealer down to hopefully bring us closer to the Red Boar? What part of that ain’t fun?”
“Okay, I get it.” She ran a hand through her hair and drew a deep breath. “Don’t you think we should focus on the actual case in Portland, though?”
“I can multi-task, darlin’. I thought I already told you that.”
“Yes, Johnny. I’m well aware of your vast skill set.”
“And I’m well aware of your sarcasm.”
“I have no problem tracking the assholes pumping city streets full of that poison, Johnny, as long as you can promise me you’ll keep your head in this case tomorrow night.”
“I’ll be sharper than a tack tomorrow night. Don’t you worry ʼbout that. Grabbin’ one of these dealers and givin’ ʼem a good what-for does a hell of a number on a guy’s optimism.”
“I’m sure it does.”
They reached the intersection Mikey had told them about in the alley the day before and stopped across the street to watch. On the corner was a rundown-looking deli with the marquee broken off one hinge and so it slanted at a precarious angle. The neon Open sign flickered in the window, and not a single pedestrian approached the entrance for either the cold cuts or an obnoxiously large pickle from the jar.
Johnny folded his arms across his chest and leaned against a tree that grew in the small park square they’d chosen as a vantage point. “Seriously? This whole damn city’s overrun with coffee shops and craft bars and goddamn dog bakeries, but no one comes to the one place that looks legit.”
Lisa frowned at the building in question. “How does that look legit to you?”
“It’s a hole in the wall, darlin’. You can’t get better than that.”
“I think in Portland, hole in the wall stands for, ‘We’re about to go out of business.’”
“Fuckin’ Portland.” He shook his head. “Ain’t no one ʼround here who knows a good thing when they see it.”
“Well, feel free to mosey on over and grab yourself a soggy sandwich.”
He frowned at her. “I ain’t here for a sandwich.”
“Oh, I know.”
Rex and Luther sniffed around the tree behind their master. “Hey, Johnny. You might wanna move out the way for a second.”
“Uh-oh. Johnny, he can’t hold it.”
The dwarf glanced at Luther, who stared at him with pleading eyes while he cavorted in an urgent canine dance. Rolling his eyes, he stepped away from the tree, and the dog sniffed madly around the base of the trunk.
“Thanks, Johnny.” Luther lifted his leg and his satisfied sigh filled Johnny’s mind. “Oh, yeah. That’s more like it.”
“You had to pick the tree I was usin’, huh?” the dwarf muttered.
“Look, Johnny. It’s nothin’ personal. I would have used another tree…”
Rex sniffed at the wet stain on the bark, then lifted his leg too. “All the others are already taken. By strangers.”
“Yeah, and they look like they need those trees more than we do, Johnny.”
The bounty hunter turned to glance across the small park square and frowned. A group of six homeless people had gathered on the grass and hunkered there to dig through their worn packs and coat pockets. Two of them talked in low, muttered voices, and the other four stared blankly in front of them.
“It’s a big thing out here too, ain’t it?”
Lisa turned to scan the group. “Homelessness? Yeah, Johnny. It’s been a problem in Portland for a while.”
“Do you think one of them’s gonna try to meet this guy on the corner?”
“Maybe. It’s hard to tell until someone makes a move.” She turned to study the sidewalk outside the deli. “But I don’t see anyone at the corner or even hiding behind it.”
“We’ll move ʼround. Try a different angle.”
With a shrug, she gestured for him to go ahead. “You’ve got the lead on this one.”
“Uh-huh. To me, boys. And leave the damn tree alone, huh?”
“It’s a good tree, Johnny.
”
“Strong tree.”
“You should try it sometime.”
The dwarf snapped his fingers and strode down the street. Lisa and the hounds followed him across the next intersection, where they stopped outside a convenience store that looked like it had seen better days than the deli, but barely. Two bearded men in baggy, stained shirts sat against the brick wall but their full beards and weather-beaten faces made it impossible to tell their age.
“Hey, look.” Luther stopped on the sidewalk and stared at the men. “Johnny, you should tell these two-legs their people are over there in the park.”
“Yeah, they smell the same too.”
Johnny ignored the hounds and nodded at the men who merely looked wearily at him.
One of them cleared his throat. “Hey, man. Nice dogs. Real pretty, all right.”
“Thanks.” He stayed where he was and stared across the street at the side of the deli. No damn dealers steppin’ out on this side either.
“Any chance you could spare a few bucks, man? Anything helps.”
“I ain’t got any spare change, brother. Sorry.” He glanced at Lisa, who widened her eyes at him. Oh, so now I’m the dwarf shellin’ out for the homeless, huh? You help one so gotta help ʼem all?
“Even a nickel or a coupla pennies,” the other man added. “A little goes a long way.”
He sighed, scanned the wall of the deli again, then turned to nod at the homeless men. “I tell ya what. My hounds have been walkin’ the city all afternoon. They are probably thirsty.”
“Yeah, we feel that, man.”
“I bet. Lisa?”
“Johnny?” She smiled at the homeless men and turned toward the dwarf.
“Do you mind goin’ inside and grabbin’ a couple of waters while I keep an eye out for our friend?”
Her smile widened. “Sure, Johnny.”
“And maybe some snacks. You know, the kind that ain’t gonna go bad if we wanna carry it ʼround with us.”
“I’ll be right back.” The bell jingled on the convenience store door as she stepped inside.
“Johnny. Hey, Johnny.” Luther spun to face his master and his tail wagged dangerously close to one of the homeless men’s faces. The guy leaned away and stared at the dwarf. “Did you say snacks?”
“Oh, man.” Rex whipped his head up from where he’d sniffed the other man’s worn boot where a hole had begun to form under the big toe. “We made a stop for dog snacks? Way to go, Johnny.”
“We’re gonna have a snack party!”
He ignored them and focused on the other side of the street. It ain’t a party until I find this dealer. That’s it.
Lisa emerged five minutes later with four bottles of water, a large bag of beef jerky, and an even larger bag of trail mix. “Is this what you had in mind?”
“That’ll do fine, darlin’.” He took two water bottles and the bag of beef jerky and ripped it open there on the street.
“Oh-ho-ho, shit, Johnny.” Luther licked his muzzle. “That smells amazing.”
“Good find, lady.” Rex sat between Lisa and Johnny and gazed hopefully from one to the other.
The dwarf took two pieces of beef jerky and handed one each to the hounds. The strips disappeared in seconds before Rex and Luther sniffed the cracked asphalt for more.
Johnny turned toward the homeless men and lifted the bag. “Y’all like jerky?”
They both looked at him with wide eyes and nodded, hesitant and uncertain. “Hell of a meal, if you ask me.”
“Keeps a while too.”
“Sure does.” Pretending to consider it, he sniffed, then stepped toward them and proffered the bag. “Y’all are welcome to it.”
The man with the hole in his boot grinned through his unkempt beard and took it quickly. “Thanks, man. That’s kind of you.”
“Much appreciated,” the other added and took a strip his friend offered him.
The bounty hunter looked at the bottles of water in his hand. “Shit. You gonna need somethin’ to wash it down.”
“Aren’t those for your dogs?”
“Naw. We can share the other two—can’t we, Lisa?”
“Yeah, I think it’s enough.”
With a grin, he handed them bottles of water, and the men gazed at him in disbelief as they took the gifts.
“You know how to make a man’s day, brother. For real.”
“Naw, y’all would do the same for me. A group of folks standin’ outside this store waitin’ for whoever we’re waitin’ for, right?”
The men nodded and focused on the beef jerky, ripping it off between their teeth.
Rex and Luther sat in front of them, their tails wagging, and watched each piece lift out of the bag and enter mouths that weren’t theirs. They said nothing, however, although both seemed poised to pounce on any stray pieces.
“How long do you think we’ll have to wait here?” Lisa asked as she held the bag of trail mix absently in one hand.
“I can’t say.” Johnny folded his arms and studied the side of the deli and the narrow alley behind it. Do you wish it were sooner rather than later?
“You said you’re waiting for a friend?” one of the homeless men asked.
“That’s right. I was told to meet him there on the corner.”
The other man finished another long drink of water, then wiped the drops from his beard and shook his head. “I think your friend told you wrong, man.”
“Oh, yeah? How’s that?”
“Nothing but no-good dealers stepping out on that sidewalk during the last few weeks. It’s a terrible thing too, pumping out all that shit into the streets. This is a good city.”
“Yeah, you don’t want to mess around with the kind of people who stand on that side.”
“Do y’all see these deals goin’ down?” Johnny asked.
“Uh-huh.”
“Yep. Every damn day. We stop here around this time and wait for Remy to go on break.”
“He’s a real nice man—like you. Most days, he’s got leftover breakfast sandwiches he can’t sell anymore ’cause they’ve been in there two days already or whatever. Real good man.”
“He sounds like it.” Johnny glanced at Lisa and she tilted her head. “I wonder if our friend got the times mixed up, though. Did y’all see anyone standin’ out here today lookin’ like he was waitin’ for someone?”
The man with the hole in his boot shook his head and stared across the street. “Nope. It’s weird when I think about it.”
“Yeah, they’re usually out there selling at all hours but nothing today at all.”
“Is that right?” The bounty hunter frowned as he considered this and sighed heavily. “Well, shit. It looks like we’ve been stood up, Lisa.”
“We’ll have to have a talk with our friend after this.” She glanced at the bag of trail mix in her hand.
“I think we will. Thanks for the updates, fellas.”
“Aw, don’t mention it. Thanks for the jerky.”
“And the water.”
One of the men looked at Rex staring at him and snorted. “These dogs look about as hungry as we did five minutes ago.”
“Boys.” Johnny snapped his fingers. “Y’all give these gentlemen some space now.”
“Aw, Johnny. They’ve got the whole bag.”
“Yeah, we’re only waiting for leftovers. Every two-legs drops something.”
The man holding the bag of jerky pulled out a piece and smiled at Rex. “Very pretty dogs, man. Is it okay if I share with this one?”
Luther whipped his head back to look at his master. “Seriously? Only Rex? I’m a pretty dog too, Johnny.”
Lisa bit her lip and expected her partner to explode about his no feeding the hounds rule.
“Hmm.” The dwarf frowned at Rex, who stared intently at the jerky strip between the homeless man’s dirt-encrusted fingers. “I suppose one more ain’t gonna hurt him. Only one, mind.”
“Read you loud and clear.” The man handed a strip to his
friend and nodded at Luther. “You get that one, Bill.”
“Sure.”
“Oh man, oh man, oh man.” Luther stretched his neck out to take the jerky politely.
“You sure are a good-looking dog.” The man with the hole in his boot offered a piece to Rex, who swallowed it in a single gulp and licked his hand in gratitude. “Sure. Look at you. A big ol’ sweetheart, aren’t you?”
“Johnny, I like these two-legs.” Rex panted and closed his eyes to enjoy a good head rub.
“Very nice two-legs,” Luther agreed and sniffed the other man’s boots.
Lisa stared at the dwarf in disbelief and a small smile played at the corner of her mouth.
He cleared his throat and pretended to ignore her. “All right, boys. We have a friend to find and these fellas have their own business to attend to.”
“Many thanks for the refreshments, brother.” One man lifted his bottle of water. “What’s your name?”
“Johnny.”
“Right on, Johnny. I’m Bill. And this is Mack. Best lawyer you’ll find on the streets.”
Mack burst out laughing. “Oh, sure. Pro bono's the only way to get it done.”
They chuckled and nodded at the bounty hunter. “Good luck finding your friend, Johnny.”
“I’ll take the luck and say thanks.” He smiled and glanced at Lisa. “It looks like this ain’t the place we were hopin’ for.”
“Then it’s time to go.” She glanced at the bag of trail mix and frowned. “Oh, no.”
“What?”
“I can’t believe I didn’t look at the ingredients in here. Dang. Hey, are either of you allergic to anything?”
Bill shook his head. “Not that I know of.”
Mack nudged his friend’s shoulder. “Except for a bath, maybe.”
“Very funny. If I could smell anymore, I’d say the same thing about you.”
“Trust me. You smell.”
Lisa chuckled and extended the bag toward them. “I’m allergic to raisins so I can’t touch any of this. Do you want it?”
“Raisins, huh?” Mack grinned at her and his weathered eyes crinkled at the corner. “I bet you could go inside and exchange that for something you can eat.”
“I have water.” She brandished the other two bottles in her hand. “And we have that friend to find.”
“Time is of the essence. That’s what I always say.” Mack took the bag from her. “Thank you.”