Changed

by E. M. Leya

  "That's what he said. He claims nothing satisfied him but being fucked."

  "What if I want to fuck you?"

  "Not happening." Justice's voice was firm. "If that ever happens, it will be with my mate, not with someone I have no attachment to."

  "But we do have an attachment, right, because you bit me?"

  "Yes, but that isn't a sexual attachment. Our attachment is more like a boss to an employee. I'm here to train you, teach you. I hate using this as an example, since we may end up fucking, but think of it like father and son. I'll have that kind of authority over you. It will be a bit more powerful, more controlling, something you can't deny or refuse. I'll be there to help you learn how to control your wolf, show you how to find a way to let your human and wolf side work together, and when your wolf tries to fight that, I'll be the one who keeps him in his place. I'll keep you from losing your human side."

  I was groggy. "What were those pills?"

  "Just strong pain pills. You feeling high?"

  "A bit." I smiled. "But the pain is easing."

  "Good. They should help for a while, but when the headache comes back, let me know. Do you think you can eat?"

  "Meat?" I licked my lips at the thought. I'd had enough dreams and visions about hunting as a wolf over the last week to make my craving of raw meat a serious thing. It's all I could think about. Justice was good to serve me venison and beef with every meal, but he was also forcing me to eat other things to keep my strength up.

  "I have a couple of steaks for you. I just need to heat them."

  I almost told him not to bother and that I'd eat them raw, but caught myself. I wasn't ready for that yet, although there was a strange craving for it. Slowly, I opened my eyes, finding that the pain had eased and the nausea was gone. "How long before it hits again?"

  "I don't know. It's going to come more often. Your wolf is strong enough now I can smell him on you. He's getting stronger, growing inside you. I'm hoping that as the hunger and arousal grow, the pain and fevers ease, but I'm not sure they will. Are you able to walk down to the kitchen or want me to bring food here?"

  "I can walk." At least I hoped I could. I wasn't sure how long I'd been in bed. Sometimes the hours felt like days. I'd lost track of how long I'd been with Justice. It didn't matter anymore. I just wanted the pain to end, the dreams to stop. "Can I shower first?" I was covered in sweat, and even though I only wore a pair of boxer shorts, my skin was sticky.

  "Sure, I'll wait out here in case you need me. I don't want to leave you right now. You're too weak."

  I hated hearing that. I didn't like needing anyone, especially now when everything that was going on in my life seemed so out of control. "I'll hurry." I eased out of bed, my muscles protesting. There wasn't an inch of me that didn't ache, and the fever I had made it seem like there was a ball of hot air around my body. Showering would be pointless. I'd sweat myself back into a sticky mess five minutes after I was done, but I needed the feel of cool water against my skin.

  After grabbing a clean pair of boxers, I made my way into the shower, quickly stripping before cranking the water on and stepping under the spray. The cool water made me groan in pleasure as I turned my face up to the ceiling and let the spray wash over my head and trail down my body. The bite mark ached, and I knew without looking that it would appear infected if I could see it. Justice had been good about watching it. I no longer needed a bandage, but it wasn't anywhere close to healed yet.

  Even though I wanted nothing more than to lean against the cool tiles and forget the world, I couldn't. Justice was waiting for me, so I quickly washed my hair, soaped my body, and rinsed. It was only a few minutes more before I was dried and back into boxers. I didn't bother with any other clothes. My body was too hot to handle anything. I'd go naked if I was alone.

  "Feel better?" Justice asked as I walked out.

  "A bit. When does this fever quit? I feel like I'm going to go up in flames."

  "Not until you shift."

  "Is there a way to make that happen faster?" I didn't even glance back at him as I opened the bedroom door and headed to the kitchen. I was hungry, and the more I thought about meat, the hungrier I became.

  "Sorry, you can't rush this. It's a process you have to go through. You're close though. At least I think so." Justice followed me into the kitchen.

  I sat down and let him get the food. The other times I'd tried to help, he'd told me to sit and let him do it. As nice as it was, I hated having him take care of me. I was an adult. I should've been able to do for myself.

  Justice pulled three steaks out and went to put them in the oven.

  "Wait." I inhaled deeply, smelling the raw meat. It was as if I'd smelled the most amazing scent in the world. My body came alive, my hunger growing. "I want it raw."

  "Are you sure?" Justice stared at me.

  I nodded, standing, and going over to him. "Please."

  Justice set two of the steaks on a plate and handed it to me, but paused before letting go as his gaze dropped lower. He smiled. "Before you eat, I need to know what you want to do about sex. Time is running out."

  I glanced down, shocked to find my boxers tented, my cock stiff and pressing against the material as if it was demanding attention. In my hunger, I hadn't even noticed I was hard. I blushed, taking the plate, and turning away.

  "Don't be embarrassed. By the time we are done, I'll have seen all of you. Even if we don't fuck, you're not going to stop playing with yourself. You won't care who is around to see."

  I swallowed hard, trying to focus on the meat. With a sigh, I ignored the knife and fork and used my hands to lift the raw meat to my mouth. I bit down, working hard to take a bite. The blood swam over my tongue and I moaned in pleasure.

  "Mark, I need to know what you want me to do."

  I chewed hard, trying to think. Did I let him fuck me? What if he was right and it was the only way to find relief? Would it hurt? Would I care at that point? I took another bite, giving myself more time.

  "You don't have time to think about this. You've had weeks to decide. Your body is about to demand an answer, Mark. I won't fuck you without your okay. I need an answer. If you don't want me, I can get a female, but you have to decide."

  Blood dripped from my fingers, dripping down my chest. I ignored it as I continued to eat. If the arousal was going to be anything like the headaches or like the fever, it would be intense. I'd been turned on before, but I had a feeling that this was going to be something like I'd never experienced before. Taking a breath, I glanced up at Justice. "If I ask you to fuck me when the time comes, do it. If you don't mind." I bit my lip, wondering how awkward this must be for him.

  "You're sure?" Justice asked once more.

  I nodded. "I don't want to suffer. If sex helps, then that's what we do. I know you probably don't want to fuck me, but if it will help, I'd appreciate you not letting me suffer."

  Justice laughed. "It's sex, of course I'm on board with it."

  "Will it hurt?"

  "At first, yes. Wolves like it rough. Unlike humans, we don't use lube or work up to things when with a partner. Most of the time we let our wolves come forward a bit and take control. Sex becomes animalistic in ways. It's about feeding a need. I won't hurt you, but it might be more aggressive than you're expecting, but I promise, by the time it comes down to that, you won't care. All your body will know is the need. Pain will be weak compared to the desire."

  I glanced down at my still tented boxer shorts which were now covered in drops of blood from the meat I'd been eating. "How long do I have?"

  "I'm guessing not long. I'm pretty sure if you touched yourself right now, it would trigger a surge of need that will only grow."

  Nodding, I reached for a drink from the water bottle Justice had set in front of me. "Then I won't touch it yet." I tried to forget how hard I was and focus on the second steak in front of me.

  "I planned ahead and put a couple bottles of lube in your bathroom cupboard. I didn't know for sure
you'd need it, but from the way Kurt and Josh talked, I figured it couldn't hurt. Kurt implied you'll be jacking off constantly, even if we have sex."

  I sighed, trying to ignore how hard my cock was and not be ashamed that I was sitting at the table with a hard-on in nothing but my boxers. Nudity was common with the wolves, I'd learned that much, but I wasn't used to it, especially in an aroused state. When it came to sex, I was inexperienced and almost shy with things, but there was nothing I could do about my current state. "Thanks, I think." I shifted in my seat, trying not to think about my arousal. The more I thought about it, the more I wanted to touch it. I took another bite of raw meat to try and distract myself. "The dreams are worse too. I'm chasing deer, killing them. It's like I'm dreaming about being a wolf."

  "That's normal. It's all part of your wolf coming forward, working his way through your mind. Right now, he thinks he can force you to shift and take control over your human side. That's why I'm here with you. We'll let him think that until you make your first shift, then I'll be here to put him in his place and teach him how to share your human body."

  "You make it sound as if we are two people, or um two beings, I guess."

  "You will be. Your wolf will be aware of everything in your mind when you are in human form, and your human side will be aware of things in wolf form. The weeks after your first shift will be spent teaching you how to work and trust both sides. At first, you'll fight it, but once you get control of everything, I think you'll find that you're going to be glad you made this decision and had this chance. Being a wolf is amazing. It's not something offered to just anyone. Kurt made a very rare exception allowing you this." Justice nodded to the meat. "Want more?"

  I shook my head. "I can't believe I'm eating it raw."

  "Get used to it. You'll crave it often once you shift. We hunt as a pack often, but even more so, go out on our own and hunt. Tavish and I are always hunting together when he's home."

  I'd almost forgotten about Justice's brother. He didn't talk about him much. I kept my word and hadn't ventured up to the top floor of the house, so all I knew was the little Justice had told me. "So you can shift any time you want and go hunt?"

  "Of course. The only rule is not to let the humans see us. It's one of the reasons we built the house so far away from everyone and everything." Justice shrugged. "A lot of us live out where we are able to be on our own."

  I wondered where I would live, what I would do. There were so many unanswered questions, but right now wasn't the time to ask. Even with the medicine Justice had given me, I was still suffering from a high fever, and while the headache was gone, my body ached, and there was a rush of uneasiness flowing through my veins. Then there was my cock. It throbbed, my pulse hammering at the base as if it was trying to push as much blood through the shaft as it could. It was getting so I couldn't ignore it any longer.

  Refusing to touch myself in front of Justice, I stood and took my plate over to the sink. I didn't bother to rinse it. "I need to…" I blushed, unable to say the words.

  Justice laughed. "Go. I'll check on you in a bit."

  I didn't respond as I rushed up the stairs to my room. The second I had the door closed, I pressed my hands to my swollen cock, groaning loudly at the pressure. I'd never been so aroused. Without hesitation, I pushed my boxers down and stepped out of them, then gripped my cock tightly in my fist. Heat surged through my body as precum dripped from the tip of my shaft. I stroked myself once, then twice before falling back on my bed, spreading my legs wide, bending my knees, and jacking off with more force than I ever had before.

  I came almost instantly, but there was no relief. I was still just as hard, just as in need, and just as aroused if not more so.

  "Fuck!" I stroked myself even faster, lifting my hips, feeding my cock into my fist, my eyes closed, head arched back as sweat formed over my skin.

  How could it happen this quickly?

  Did this mean I was going to shift soon?

  I tried to think back to how long it had been since Justice had bitten me, but in the fog of arousal, I couldn't remember anything. It had been weeks, but beyond that, I wasn't sure. I tried to recall the order things would happen, but came up blank. All I could focus on was my cock and the pleasure I found with each stroke of my fist, yet no matter how much that pleasure coursed through me, there wasn't any relief.

  Tears stung my eyes as I fought to come again. I wanted it. Needed it. I'd never been so desperate for an orgasm in my life. Should I call Justice to help? Was I ready for that? Could I handle it?

  The thought of being fucked scared the hell out of me. Justice wasn't a small man, and I'd seen him naked. His cock was thick and heavy even soft. How much bigger would he get when he was hard. The thought of that thickness spreading my ass had me nervous, but if it took away the consuming need that was controlling me, it might be worth it. Would the pleasure outweigh the pain?

  I came twice more, but there still wasn't any satisfaction. If anything, my cock was harder, the precum nearly flowing constantly from me. All I was doing was making it worse. I bit my lip, fighting the urge to call for help, but couldn't do it. Finally, with a frustrated cry, I screamed, "Justice!"

  As if he'd been waiting, the door to the bedroom opened and he stepped inside, then closed the door behind him. I stared up at him, continuing to pleasure myself, not caring that I was covered in my own cum, not worried about my nakedness. The only thing that mattered was finding relief from this all-consuming need. "Take me."

  Without a word, Justice stripped. I watched in a haze as he slipped out of his shirt, then his pants. His cock was hard, standing thick against his stomach. He was big, but I found I no longer feared the pain. I wanted it. Needed it. Somehow, I was sure that it would be the roughness, the violence, the agony that finally brought me what I needed.

  "You're sure?" Justice stared down at me on the bed.

  "Yes." I couldn't wait. I opened my legs wider, unsure of what to do.

  Justice put one knee on the bed to come to me, but before he could, the bedroom door slammed open and a man who looked exactly like Justice rushed in, grabbing Justice by the arms, and tossing him aside.

  "What the fuck?" Justice glared at him.

  "What are you doing with my mate?" The man stared at me, his nostrils flaring, his chest heaving as he started to lift his shirt from his body. "He's mine."

  I didn't care. I was too far gone to understand the confusion. Maybe I was seeing double, imagining things. There was a faint thought of something about a twin, but the thought was gone almost as soon as it came.

  Thrusting my hips, working my cock, I cried out, pain sharp in my balls. "Please." Heat consumed me, my body on fire, but as I tried to focus, I found everyone gone, and I was all alone.

  CHAPTER FIVE

  Tavish

  I shoved against Justice as he blocked the doorway. "Get out of my way. He needs me."

  "Your mate? You're sure?" Justice stared at me in shock.

  "You don't mistake something like that. Now let me get to him. What's wrong with him?" I asked, trying to understand the strange scent I was catching. His arousal consumed me and it was hard to smell anything beyond that, other than the scent that told me the man in that bedroom, naked on the bed was my mate.

  I'd scented him the moment I'd climbed out of my truck out front of the house. My wolf had known immediately what the smell was and it was all I could do to keep from knocking my brother out to get to him.

  "He's still human. He hasn't shifted yet. He's close, but I'm not sure how close." Justice held a hand to my chest. "Tavish, you can't take him right now. He doesn't know you."

  "I'm his mate. He knows me." Nothing mattered once you found your mate. It was just accepted. The two wolves rejoiced in finding something that few ever found. Still, Justice's words found their way into my head finally. "What do you mean he's human and hasn't shifted?" I narrowed my eyes. "You bit someone?" My stomach tightened in disgust at the thought of my twin breaking the most
cardinal rule we had as shifters.

  "Kurt approved it. Mark had a choice to become one of us or die." Justice's fingers pressed into my skin. "I bit him a few weeks ago, but he hasn't shifted yet. If you can smell that he's your mate, he must be very close."

  None of this made sense. Why would Kurt approve anyone being bitten? I wanted answers, but more, I wanted my mate in my arms. I needed to touch him, run my nose over his sweaty skin, then sink inside him and complete the bonding. I sucked in a breath as I realized that if he'd never shifted, we couldn't perform the bonding ceremony.

  A loud cry of agony came from the room.

  "I have to go to him." I gripped Justice's wrist to force his hand from my chest.

  "You can't. He never agreed to be with you."

  "But he did you?" I glared.

  "I'm the one who bit him. We discussed this before it happened. He said if he called out for help, I should fuck him to help ease the pain. I had no way of knowing he was your mate, Tavish. I swear if I'd known…" He shook his head. "Fuck, what a mess."

  Justice knew that he couldn't go in there with my mate. If he tried, I'd easily lose control and try to kill him. It didn't matter that Justice was my twin. My pull to my mate was stronger. "I can't leave him in pain."

  Justice sighed.

  "Listen, I'll deal with the fallout later, but he needs me right now. I can't ignore his cries. Hell, the scent of his pain is nearly taking me to my knees. Let me do what needs to be done, Justice. We'll figure it all out later." I wanted answers, wanted to know how all this happened, but my wolf was restless, fighting to come forward, and it was all I could do to hold him back.

  "Fine, but you need to know something first." Justice dropped his hand from my chest. "He's a virgin. He's never been with another person, human or wolf, male or female. You'll be his first. He has no clue what sex is like at all, let alone for us. If you shift even partially during sex, if you bite him when you come, you're going to freak him out. He's scared to death already of what he's changing into. Don't make it worse."