by E. M. Leya
"It's possible. Kurt said none of this was going to happen the same way every time and any of the side-effects could last hours or days. He's been through a lot the last few weeks, but this week has been the worst. The sexual tension started this morning, the headaches, fevers, and dreams have been going on a week or more. He asked for raw meat for the first time this morning, and I'm guessing he'll stick with that until he shifts. Kurt said to force some fruits or vegetables on him, but I'm not sure how we'll manage that. While we'll eat berries and other stuff in wolf form, I'm guessing that Mark's wolf isn't worried about nutrition right now. He wants to hunt and fuck." Justice shrugged. "Need me to contact Cohen to see if he has any little blue pills for you so you can keep up with your mate?"
I growled at my brother. "I don't need pills."
"We'll see. Even with all those groupies you fuck when you're on tour, I have a feeling this week might be more than even you can handle, little brother."
I hated when he called me that. I was minutes younger than he was, but he never tired of calling me younger. I rolled my eyes and flipped him off before turning and heading upstairs.
My body had been tense since the moment I stepped out of my truck, Mark's scent consuming me, but it got worse the closer I was to him. Just going from the kitchen to the bedroom amped it up a million levels. I wondered how much stronger it would get as Mark's first shift got closer and then after his shift when I was finally able to meet his wolf and allow him to meet mine. It was almost overwhelming. I'd thought I'd experienced everything over my lifetime already, but I had never gone through anything like this.
I glanced into Mark's bedroom, watching him sleep. He was restless, moaning, and tossing and turning. Sweat glistened from his naked body, affirming the fever was still high, and his cock was engorged, thick and hard against his thigh.
I wanted him again, but he needed to sleep as long as he could. I wouldn't interrupt that no matter how badly I wanted to go to him and rub my scent over his body. What I needed to do was go upstairs and shower, but I couldn't bring myself to leave him.
As he slept, I leaned against the doorframe, taking in his thin body. I wanted to know everything about him, tell him all about me. I'd never cared much for getting to know my lovers. Serious relationships weren't easy when I was on tour months at a time, but with Mark, I wanted serious, I wanted intimate, I wanted to know everything. Because he was my mate, I wasn't worried about it working out. It was meant to be, and no matter what, we would find a way to make everything work.
I wondered what he was dreaming as he rolled to his back, soft growls coming from him. Was he dreaming of hunting? The thought of running through the forest with my mate sent a thrill through me. Being on the road all of the time, I didn't get to hunt as often as I wanted to. The band and I would find places to run from time to time, even join with other packs along the road when we could, but moving from city to city almost daily meant we didn't get a lot of free time. By the time we came back home, we were all anxious to get out and hunt.
The band would be shocked that I'd come home to find my mate. I was the first out of the four of us to find their mate. We all talked about it, but none really believed it would happen. Finding a mate was rare, and those who did were lucky. The band would be excited for me, but I was sure they'd also worry that it would affect the band in a negative way. I wouldn't let it. I'd find a way to have my mate and still live the dream of being a rock star.
The band had been my life up until now, but with a mate, everything was going to change. Mark would be my main focus, my first responsibility. I wouldn't let the band down, but they would have to understand that Mark was now front and center in my life.
I wondered if he was a fan. Did he like my music? The band was popular, getting airtime on almost every rock station in the world. Jackson, Mitch, Theo, and I had dived headfirst into our music when we'd formed the band. We'd made it big just about five years ago, going from playing clubs and bars to rocking arenas and winning awards. It wasn't easy, especially since we were all wolves. It would mean in time we'd have to quit because people would notice we weren't aging. It was why we all decided to enjoy it while we could.
Our band, Destiny, had fans around the world. To the average human, we looked like a group of twenty-something men who had pushed dreams of making it big and succeeded. Truth was, most of us were sixty to eighty years old and had grown up just playing for pack events and for fun. It wasn't until a couple of local bars had asked us to play that we had even thought about trying to make a career out of playing. Once we made that decision, things had happened fast. I was still stunned when I stood in front of twenty thousand screaming fans. It was hard to believe that so many people loved our music and would pay to hear us play. I never took it for granted.
A loud moan pulled me from my thoughts, and I watched as Mark's hand trailed down his body to fist his cock. He gave it a tight squeeze before stroking it several times. His hips lifted, his body arched, and he cried out again in need.
He was still asleep, but I didn't want him suffering. If I could ease his pain before it got worse, I was going to do it. Determined to help him again, I stepped into the room, working my pants off as I walked before dropping them at the foot of the bed and climbing back onto the mattress with him. "I've got you." I leaned down and ran my tongue down his chest and over his stomach.
The scent of his arousal had me instantly hard.
"Make it stop." Mark's eyes stayed closed as he continued to stroke himself.
"I will." I licked over the head of his cock, getting my first taste of him. It was like fire on my tongue. He tasted amazing, and for a moment I debated on taking him into my mouth, but I was pretty sure, that wouldn't give him the relief he needed. "Do you want me inside you again?"
"Yes." His voice was breathy, and his cock seemed to weep even more.
"Then let me in." I pulled his legs up and over my shoulders before positioning my cock to his entrance. With one smooth thrust forward, I was in him, buried deep.
Mark's eyes opened, staring up at me as his body moved with mine. He used his legs for leverage, rocking his ass over my cock as I started to pump inside him.
"I can smell your wolf. He's close. Let him come forward." I was pretty sure I remembered someone telling me that the final change usually happened during sex since it was when the human mind was at its weakest, allowing the wolf to take over and come out. I wasn't sure how close Mark was to shifting, but the sooner the better. Once his wolf was out, he wouldn't suffer as much as he was now.
Our bodies worked together, thrusting, and pushing against each other as we continued to stare into each other's eyes. It was hard to think that he thought I was Justice. I wanted him to know me, fuck me, love me.
"More." Mark's voice was raspy as he moved with me.
I grabbed his legs, holding them in my hands as I pushed them back, almost doubling him over himself as I started to fuck him harder, my body slapping against his, my cock taking him deep, and my own arousal growing with each thrust.
Mark worked his cock in his fist in what looked like painful strokes. There was nothing gentle about what we were doing. It was raw need, hard lust.
My wolf was right there with me, so close to coming forward that I had to fight him to hold back. The last thing Mark needed was for me to even partially shift and have him realize he was fucking my wolf and not just me. In time, it wouldn't be a big deal, but until he was comfortable, I needed to hold that part of myself back. The need to bite him during orgasm was when it was the hardest. I wanted to partially shift so I could sink my fangs into him. I wanted my mate's blood running over my tongue. I needed to taste him in every way possible.
I was close, but tried to hold off for him. He was the one who needed the release. I liked that I could see him this time. While my wolf liked to take him from behind, I liked being able to look into Mark's eyes, watch the pleasure on his face, and see the way his mouth parted when I'd hit just the right spots
to push him closer to coming.
It didn't take much longer. I watched Mark's stomach muscles tighten, watched his eyes roll back, watched his balls pull tight, then he was crying out as his release rushed through him, shooting high into the air before dropping back over him, covering his hand and stomach.
God, how I wanted to lick him clean.
I gave in to my own need, filling him with my own cum, hoping that would help ease whatever he was going through.
Mark sighed contently as he dropped his legs to the bed. "Thank you."
I stayed on my knees, unable to pull from inside him until the knot shrank. Wishing I could kiss him, tell him how much he meant to me, I caressed my hands over his stomach, through the mess of cum on his skin, rubbing it over him. "I'll always take care of your needs," I promised him.
Mark's eyes opened and he stared up at me. "You sound like you care."
I smiled. "I do." My pulse raced as I looked down at him, ready for any reaction. "I need to tell you something while your head's clear. Please stay calm. Don't try and move away from me. You'll hurt both of us until I'm able to pull out."
"Why wouldn't I stay calm? Is something wrong? Am I not going to shift and you'll have to kill me?"
I reached for his hand, holding it in mine. "No, you're doing fine. Your wolf is getting closer. I don't know how long it will be, but everything is normal." I swallowed hard, then told him the truth. "I'm not Justice. I'm his twin, Tavish."
Mark's eyes went wide. "Why?" He tried to pull back, but my cock was still secured inside him.
I gripped his hips, holding him in place, not wanting the pain that would come from him forcing us apart. "I got home right before he was about to fuck you and stopped him. I couldn't let him be with you. My wolf would have killed him if he'd taken you."
Mark narrowed his eyes. "You'd kill your brother?"
I nodded. "I could smell you the second I got out of my truck out front. I knew instantly."
"Knew what?" Mark gave another gentle tug to try and move from me, but stopped the moment there was tension from my cock locked inside him.
"You're my mate." I sighed, seeing the anger in his eyes. "I didn't know what to do. You needed relief, but I couldn't let Justice have sex with you. You're my mate, and that means I'll kill anyone who touches you. It's biology. I can't help it. I couldn't let you suffer, so I took Justice's place."
"Get off me." Mark pushed again.
If not for my hands holding him, he would have torn away, causing severe pain for both of us if he forced my cock from him too soon. "Easy." I groaned. "You'll hurt us both. Give it a few more minutes and the knot will shrink.
"You took me without permission."
"I had to ease your pain. You were begging."
"For Justice, not you." Mark closed his eyes, seeming to finally give up trying to get away from me. "I can't do this."
"The worst is almost over," I promised him. "I can sense your wolf close. I'd be shocked if you don't shift in a few days, a week at most." I smelled Mark's anger and confusion. "Listen, I know what I did was wrong, but I didn't have a choice. You needed me. If you didn't find relief, you'd have hurt yourself trying to find it. I wanted to tell you after the first time, but you fell asleep. I won't take you again without your permission, but I can't let Justice have you either."
Mark shook his head. "This is too much. I don't understand." He pinched the bridge of his nose. "You said you're my mate? What does that mean? Justice mentioned it, but I wasn't really listening. All the other shit going on seemed more important."
I wished I could move so I could be beside him instead of in him. "Wolves aren't like humans. We have one destined partner who is meant for us. We know them by their scent. You're mine. You'll understand it more once you shift, but your wolf will be drawn to me, in fact, he'll have a hard time being away from me."
"Destined? I don't get a choice?"
"You always get a choice. The mating isn't final until we do a mating ceremony. There are a few cases of mates refusing to be together, but it's not easy. The pull to be together is strong, and it's almost painful to ignore it. The only way to possibly get through it is for us to be hundreds or thousands of miles apart. If you left, I couldn't know where you went because I'd follow. I know this is all new to you, but I want this. I want you. I've waited my entire life to find my mate."
"How can you want me? You don't even know me." Mark tried to move again. "How long does this take to release?" He gestured to where they were knotted together with an exasperated wave.
"A few more minutes probably." I reached out and caressed a hand down his side. "As to how I could want you without knowing you, it's easy. Mates are almost always the perfect person for us. It could be someone we'd never pick for ourselves, but somehow, the Powers That Be seem to know who is right. Your wolf's scent tells me that we are perfect for each other."
Mark sighed. "I don't want this."
My heart sank, but I held on to hope that once he shifted, more of the natural wolf instinct would take over and he would understand better. I had to remember he wasn't raised as a wolf and still thought of everything in human terms. "Okay, I respect that, but you have to know it doesn't change my feelings for you. I still want you. I won't push you, but I won't give up hope that you'll change your mind in time. Finding a mate is a once in a lifetime thing. It's what humans would call meeting your soulmate."
Mark nodded. "I understand. I just can't be that right now. This is all too much."
Feeling my cock had deflated, I pulled back, breaking the connection of our bodies. "I know. I talked to Justice and he told me everything that happened. You weren't really given a choice in this. I get that you are overwhelmed. I'll step back, but I'm not giving up." I eased down on the bed beside him, my cock limp, but still wet from our sex. "Something you do need to decide is if you want us having sex again. The shift is coming, but until then, this need will come again. I can't let anyone else near you. It would be suicide for them to even try. Just the thought has my wolf on edge. So, when you are crying out with arousal in a few hours, what do you want me to do?"
Mark closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. "I hate this. I can't stand how helpless this makes me feel. I have no control over my body."
"It won't last. Once you shift, things will be easier." I couldn't resist trailing my fingers down his arm. I needed to touch him, even if he didn't want me to.
"Will it? Justice said my wolf will try and fight me for control, and even if he doesn't get it, I'll still have to share my body, my mind with him. What if I can't control him and Justice has to boss me around the rest of my life or worse yet, kill me? No matter what happens, I have lost the ability to do what I want. To plan my own life. It sounds like I'll be forced to join the pack, which means those ties will control me as well. I just can't—"
I put a finger to Mark's lips to silence him. "No, it's not like that at all. We all do what we want, all enjoy our lives and live our dreams. You will see it's not as horrible as you think. Think of the pack as a huge family that is always there for you if you need them. They don't control you, but they have your back always. Just like you'll have theirs if they need something. As for your dreams, you can live them. There is nothing you can't do. I tour the world, perform on stage for tens of thousands of people every night. Justice lives his dreams, building homes. Every wolf does what they want. If anything, being part of the pack will make it easier for you. You have a support team behind you. Pack is there to help, not to control."
"You're really in a band?" Mark asked. "Justice mentioned something about it, but it was the first day I got here and I was too nervous to listen to everything."
"Yeah, I'm the lead singer for Destiny." I paused, waiting to see if Mark recognized the name. Anyone who listened to rock music knew who we were.
"Oh!" Mark's eyes widened. "I've heard you on the radio. You're really good."
"Thanks." I smiled. "It's a lot of fun."
Mark sighed. "I don'
t know what Justice told you about me."
I shook my head. "Not a lot. Only what happened to force him to bite you. I figure we'll have plenty of time to talk and get to know each other. Right now, you need to eat before another wave of arousal takes you or the headaches come back. Think you're up to coming downstairs or would you rather I bring something up here?"
"I can come down." Mark sat up slowly. "I feel so weak."
"This is taking a lot of energy from you. Once you eat, you can sleep some more. We just need to make sure we keep you fed and hydrated." I stood but stayed near the bed sensing how weak he was. The last thing I wanted was for my mate to collapse beside the bed.
To my surprise, Mark managed to stand on his own. He took a moment as if getting his bearings, then wandered toward the bathroom. "I'm going to shower, then I'll meet you downstairs."
I nodded as I started for the door. "Call me if you need anything."
"Tavish?" Mark called before I could close the bedroom door.
"Yeah?"
"If I need you again… You know, to help me get through that…" He gestured to the bed.
I nodded.
"Help me. Don't let me suffer."
Relieved that he still wanted my help, I gave a nod. "I'll be with you through all of this and do everything I can to make it easier, I promise."
"Thanks." Mark blew out a long breath before walking into the bathroom and closing the door.
CHAPTER SEVEN
Mark
I made my way downstairs, nervous to face both Tavish and Justice. I was embarrassed about my sexual needs, and even more so now because Justice would have heard everything that went on in the bedroom between Tavish and me. It wasn't like we were quiet. The loud howl that came from Tavish every time he came nearly rattled the windows.
God, could things get any more confusing?
It was bad enough I was forced into becoming a wolf, forced to face all these side-effects and desires I couldn't control, but now, I was forced to face the fact that Tavish was my mate. A man I'd only met a few hours ago, had sex with without even knowing he was the man I was supposed to spend my entire life with? It was too much to even think about. I just wanted to make my own choices, control my own life, especially my love life.