“That all seems reasonable.”
“Oh, and I spoke with someone at the desk downstairs. The maintenance guy should be coming by sometime today to take a look at the heater.”
“Shame.” Seth grinned at him. “I kind of enjoyed the sleeping arrangements last night.”
“Yes, well ...” Erik rubbed the back of his neck. He had too, but the thought of admitting that out loud to Seth was more than he could manage. If he wanted to sleep beside him again, he knew all he’d have to do was ask Seth, but the words stuck in his throat. He was a grown man; he knew he should just say what he wanted, but he had no idea how to. He was so far out of his depth here.
Seth cleared his throat. “I need to finish reading through this article before I send it off to my editor. Do you mind?”
“No, of course not. I should finish my notes as well.”
Erik retrieved his laptop, and they both worked for an hour or so while Christmas carols played merrily in the background. Several times, he caught Seth humming under his breath, and when Seth shifted position, Erik caught a glimpse of green and red striped socks peeking out from the hem of his pants. He ducked his head to hide a smile. Of course, Seth wore Christmas socks.
As Seth set his laptop aside with a relieved-sounding sigh, Erik’s stomach growled. He glanced at his watch, surprised to see it was nearly one p.m.
“Ready for lunch?” Seth asked.
“I guess so.” Erik glanced at the window and sighed. “I’m not looking forward to trekking through that however.”
It was still snowing heavily, and the leaden snow clouds blanketing the sky didn’t appear anywhere near finished.
Seth groaned. “Me either. And I like snow.”
“You would.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means you seem like the type of guy who would enjoy bad weather.”
“Is that some sort of weird insult?”
“No.” Erik laughed. “You just generally seem good-humored. Other people get all grumpy about bad weather and what an inconvenience it is; whereas, you’d see the brighter side of it. You’d enjoy how pretty it was or something.”
“First of all, when you say other people, you mean you, don’t you?”
Erik shrugged. “I suppose so.”
“Second, yeah, it is pretty and picturesque. Especially this time of year. It feels more Christmasy when it’s snowed, you know?”
“Well, I think this is about as Christmasy as it gets.” He set his own laptop down and stood.
“I wouldn’t mind some gentle fluffy flakes and sunshine instead, but I’ll take this over rain and mud on Christmas Day, that’s for sure.” Seth smiled at him.
“Come on, Santa’s elf,” Erik held out a hand to Seth. “I’m starving, and if we want food, we’re going to have to go out in the weather, no matter how bad it is.”
Seth took his hand, laughing, and let Erik pull him off the bed. “Santa’s elf?”
“The striped socks,” Erik explained. “They’re very ... festive. And elf-ish.”
“I think it’s elven. And thanks. I’m quite partial to them. I have quite a few pairs of Christmas socks actually.”
“Of course, you do.”
“I can show you my holiday underwear too, if you’d like,” Seth said with a naughty little grin.
Erik chuckled. “Themed boxers?”
“Oh, no.” Seth stepped closer and rested his hand on Erik’s chest. It felt warm even through Erik’s shirt and sweater. “Much less fabric than that.”
“Oh.” Erik gulped.
“Like I said, just ask ... I’d be happy to show you.”
“I’ll ... keep that in mind,” he managed. “Now, how about lunch?”
Seth’s lips twitched in a little smile, but he patted Erik’s chest and stepped back. “Lead the way.”
After checking to be sure the cafe was open, they made the half-block trek. They were both covered in snow by the time they arrived. Seth shook the snow from his coat like a dog, then helped Erik brush his off. The cafe was surprisingly full for Christmas Day in the middle of a snowstorm, but perhaps he and Seth weren’t the only ones who had been trapped in the city with nowhere else to go. They both ordered soup and sandwiches. Erik went for a winter minestrone while Seth ordered squash soup, and they split a Christmas sandwich.
Seth’s eyes went wide after he took a bite of it. “This is so good.”
Erik tried it and nodded his agreement. “What was on it again? Baguette with roasted turkey, I know. And that looks like spinach and bacon.”
“Mmmhmm. And cranberry-horseradish mayo. I’m not sure where the sage and onion flavor is coming from. I don’t remember there being any stuffing in it, but maybe it’s a rub for the turkey. It’s delicious though. I may have to write up a post about the food here. Even the leftover, cold half of a panini you gave me was delicious.”
Erik flushed. “Sorry I didn’t have anything else ...”
“No.” Seth looked surprised, and he rested his hand on Erik’s forearm. “No, it was sweet of you to share with me. I know you’d had a shitty day yesterday, and I appreciated your generosity.”
Erik leaned forward. “I didn’t mean to be such an ogre to you then,” he said gruffly.
Seth shrugged. “I was pretty pissed when you slammed the cab door in my face, but I know no one is in a good mood when flights get canceled. Especially around the holidays.”
“This is a tough time of year for me too,” Erik admitted. “I haven’t enjoyed the holidays in years, and ending up in Buffalo when I wanted to be in Tahiti didn’t help. I really was having a shitty day, but you didn’t deserve to have me take it out on you.”
“It’s okay.” Seth patted his arm, his expression sympathetic. “I’m not the kind to hold grudges. It’s water under the bridge. I promise.” He gave Erik a serious look. “Can you do something for me though?”
“Depends on what it is, but I’ll try to if I can.”
“Keep an open mind for the next couple of days?”
“About what?”
Seth grinned at him. “Well, ideally about everything. But if you’re willing, I’d like to show you how much fun Christmas can be if you’re open to it.”
“What exactly would that entail?” Erik asked warily.
“Holiday movies, Christmas carols, that sort of thing.”
Erik relaxed. “I could probably do that.”
“Just keep an open mind and try to have fun with it. That’s all I’m asking.”
“Okay,” Erik said with a small smile. “I will.”
Seth squeezed his arm just as the waitress approached, and Erik realized they’d been leaning very close to each other over the small table, and Seth had been resting his hand on Erik’s arm for the past five or ten minutes. He wondered if people assumed he and Seth were ... intimately involved. It was an odd thought, but it didn’t make him want to pull away. Which was probably pretty telling too.
“Is there anything else I can you get you two? We have great pies,” the waitress said.
“No. I’m stuffed,” Erik admitted. “But thank you.”
“Will you be open later?” Seth asked.
She shook her head. “No, we want our employees to have a chance to go home to their families.”
“Of course,” Seth said with a smile. He glanced at Erik out of the corner of his eye before he looked back at the waitress. “I’m just trying to figure out what we should do for dinner tonight. We’re staying at the Williamsville Inn, and we’re a little short on options.”
“There’s a Chinese restaurant about half a block in the other direction that stays open on Christmas every year,” she said. She tapped her pen on her lips. “Hmm. I can’t think of anywhere else that’s likely to be open though.”
“Chinese food works for me,” Erik said. “Thank you.”
“This isn’t the first Chinese Christmas dinner you’ve had, is it?” Seth said as she walked away.
“No,
” Erik admitted. “It’s not. Last year, Robin and I were already separated. I spent Christmas morning with my daughter Joanna at her childhood home, but after she went to her mother’s new place that afternoon, I ordered Chinese delivery. That was my holiday meal.”
Seth winced. “My heart hurts just thinking about you all alone in some house, eating Chinese food.”
“It wasn’t a great moment,” Erik admitted, feeling a lump in his throat.
“Were Christmases happier before that?”
“We did our best to make them fun for Joanna, but no, I don’t think Robin and I were ever particularly merry on Christmas. It doesn’t matter how many people are around; if you don’t feel a connection to them, it’s lonely.”
Seth nodded, his expression growing serious. “I’ve had that happen when I travel right after a breakup. I can be in the middle of a crowd and feel like I’m separated from all of them by some impenetrable wall.”
“That surprises me.” Erik leaned in. “You seem like such a happy guy.”
“I am.” Seth shrugged. “I honestly am most days. But that doesn’t mean I never have bad days or that losing someone I care about doesn’t get me down from time to time.”
“Of course,” Erik said, feeling foolish. “I shouldn’t have said that.”
“Just know that while I may not have ever been in your shoes, it doesn’t mean I’ve never felt that kind of loneliness. At least, to some degree.”
Seth reached out and took Erik’s hand, curling his fingers around Erik’s in a warm gesture of sympathy. Erik squeezed back, feeling a little of the lingering loneliness retreating at the touch and the warm look in Seth’s brown eyes.
The mood lightened as they walked back to the inn. The snow was still coming down heavily, but the wind had let up enough to make it almost pleasant.
Snow clung to the dark hair that escaped Seth’s hat and dusted his eyelashes. Before they reached the front door of the hotel, Seth tilted his head back and looked up at the sky with a sweet smile on his face. Despite the snow attempting to work its way into any sliver of space between Erik’s scarf and the bare skin of his neck, he paused and just looked at Seth. He looked so happy and at ease he made Erik feel at ease too.
“Hey, come here.” Erik grabbed Seth’s hand and tugged. He gave Erik a surprised look but followed as Erik pulled him toward the entrance of the building. It wasn’t until they were halfway through the lobby that it occurred to him that he and Seth were still holding hands. His steps faltered, but he left his hand in Seth’s and kept going. Whatever was happening here with Seth was happening so organically, he didn’t want to waste his time and question it. Nothing about what they’d done so far had felt wrong, so why worry about it?
“Where are we going?” Seth asked, trotting to keep up with him.
“You’ll see.”
Rather than go left toward the check-in desk, he went right toward the door to the courtyard he’d found earlier. “Oh,” Seth said as he pushed open the door. “I had no idea this courtyard was here. Makes sense, though, with the way the building is laid out.”
Their room was on the outside of the building and faced a parking lot, so Erik wasn’t surprised he hadn’t seen the courtyard yet. “I found it this morning when I was taking my tour.” The door closed behind them with a metallic thud. “Hopefully, we can get back in.”
“This is beautiful,” Seth said. “Look how picturesque it is.”
“I thought so too. It’s partly why I decided the building was worth holding on to.”
“Thanks for bringing me out here.” Seth’s smile was wide and joyous. “I bet it’s magical out here at night.”
Everything seemed a little more magical with Seth around. It never would have occurred to Erik to come out here at all on his own. Seth wandered away, exclaiming about the little wrought iron tables and globe-style lamps. Erik was more interested in the architecture, and he scrutinized the building, wondering how more modern windows would change the look of the place.
Something hit the back of his jacket with a solid thud, and he jerked in surprise, whirling around to face Seth, who grinned at him, holding a second snowball up threateningly.
“Don’t you dare!” He glared at Seth. “Don’t even think about it!”
“Too late!” The snowball left Seth’s hand in a perfect arc, and Erik was so shocked he couldn’t even dodge it in time. Instead, it exploded against his chest in a shower of white. It knocked the wind from Erik, and he staggered back and let out a surprised cough.
“Oh shit.” In a moment, Seth was by his side, gripping his elbow. “Are you okay? I shouldn’t have thrown it right at your chest.”
Erik let out another little cough but already the feeling of pressure was subsiding.
“I don’t know,” he wheezed, playing it up. “I can’t breathe.”
“Oh, Erik, I am so sorry,” Seth said, brushing the snow from his chest with a worried frown. “Do you need me to call someone?”
Unable to maintain a straight face any longer, Erik laughed and straightened, shaking his head at Seth.
“I’m just kidding,” he said with a laugh. “It knocked the wind out of me for a second, but I’m fine. Your face though!”
“You asshole!” This time Seth’s voice was teasing as he said the words. “You worried me.” He lightly slapped at Erik’s arm and a shower of snow flew off.
“It’s called payback,” Erik said calmly. “And so is this.”
He scooped up a handful of snow, and he could see Seth still processing his words as he clapped his snowy glove across his face.
Seth sputtered and shoved his hand away, but he was laughing as he did it, and Erik grinned.
Seth scooped up some snow and held it up threateningly. Erik grabbed his arm, yanking Seth toward him. He stumbled, falling against Erik’s chest with a small, surprised cry. They froze, staring at each other. Erik’s gaze dropped to Seth’s lips, and he watched his tongue peek out and sweep across them. They looked soft. Kissable. He wondered if Seth’s beard would tickle if he pressed their lips together. Erik shivered at the thought.
“We should probably get back inside,” he said.
“Yeah, we should.”
But neither of them looked away. Erik brushed a little snow off Seth’s cheek, but his gloves were snowy too and he just made it worse. “Sorry, I ...”
When Seth’s tongue peeked out to swipe across his lips, Erik lost all train of thought. God, he wanted to kiss Seth. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d wanted to kiss someone so badly. How long had it been since he’d last kissed anyone passionately?
“It’s okay,” Seth said, sounding a little breathless. He still gripped the collar of Erik’s coat.
“I ...” Erik struggled to figure out what to say to him. Should he ask him if it was okay first? Or should he just lean in and press their lips together? It had been so long since he’d done this last. And it had been decades since it had been with someone new. This uncertainty and hesitation were excruciating.
Erik’s heart pounded in his chest as he leaned forward, his lips mere inches from brushing Seth’s. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and ... the metallic grating of a door made Erik lift his head. Seth stepped back, letting go of Erik’s jacket, and Erik debated if he should just grab Seth and plant a kiss on him before he could chicken out.
Chapter Six
“Oh.” The woman standing in the doorway that led to the courtyard looked startled. She was maybe ten to fifteen years older than Erik and, based on the outfit that peeked out from under her heavy coat, she worked as a housekeeper for the hotel. In fact, she was probably the woman he’d seen earlier. She held an unlit cigarette in her hand. “Sorry to interrupt. I just came out for a smoke. I can go though, if ...”
If you want some privacy, Erik finished in his head. “No, I think we’re heading inside now. But thank you.”
“Sure.” She held the door open as they approached. “Merry Christmas.”
Seth grinned at her. “Merry Christmas to you too.”
Erik and Seth were both quiet as they knocked the snow off their shoes, then crossed the lobby to the elevator. Neither of them spoke until they reached the room in fact, and Erik wondered if things were going to be awkward. Maybe he should apologize for the near kiss? He’d thought that there was something between them, but what if he was wrong? Had Seth been flirting with him this morning or had he imagined it all?
“I’m sorry,” he blurted out just as Seth said, “How’d your company end up with this hotel anyway?”
They blinked at each other. “Why are you sorry?” Seth asked, a frown furrowing his forehead. He unwound his scarf, then shrugged out of his jacket. Little bits of snow drifted down, blanketing the floor.
“Oh. Um, never mind.” Erik took his own coat off and held out his hand. “Here, let’s hang these in the bathroom so if the snow melts, it’ll drip onto the tile and be easier to clean up.” Seth grabbed some hangers from the closet, and they hung all their outdoor clothing off the shower curtain rod and lined up their shoes on the tile near the sink.
“Does it seem any warmer in here to you?” Erik said as they returned to the room. The housekeeper had clearly been in. The beds were re-made and the towels in the bathroom had all been picked up and replaced with fresh ones.
“I’m warm at the moment,” Seth said, sounding a little dubious. “But that may just be because it was so cold outside.”
“At least, they gave us some extra blankets.” Erik nodded at the small stack that lay folded at the foot of each bed.
“I still prefer body heat,” Seth said with a little grin. “But it’s good to have options.”
Erik chuckled as he pulled the dresser drawer open, but his amusement quickly faded when he realized he only had two pairs of socks left. “Damn.”
“Everything okay?”
“Yeah, just didn’t pack enough socks,” Erik admitted.
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