by Marie, Carly
Damn, that would be difficult.
Trent jumped in before I could say anything else. "Absolutely. And then there are the morons on the Internet that swear age play is the same as pedophilia."
I winced. I hadn't heard that, and it hadn't even crossed my mind.
Trent shrugged. "Yeah, it exists, and it can make it really hard for people to admit they are littles."
"Especially if they already have kids. It can be hard to separate the two parts of themselves. Cal and I know a guy who has kids and he struggles with being Dad and little, despite knowing how important being little is to him. Even with his own set of toys and keeping everything away from his kids, he worries a lot about what would happen if anyone ever found out about his little side."
"Fuck, that's a lot to process. I hadn't even thought of it like that. That could be part of what Gray's dealing with. He told me I shouldn't have to come home to be Dad to the kids and Daddy to him… or something along those lines. I don't remember his exact words, but he seemed worried about me juggling too many hats."
Both men fell silent for a few seconds while they thought. Travis found words first, humming to himself as the thoughts fully formed. "That makes sense. I think that it’s going to have to be something you work through with him overtime. Hopefully, with a little experience, you’ll be able to show him more than tell him that it’s not too much. It might just be something he needs to see to believe.”
That made sense and I found myself nodding along as Trent spoke. I’d been damn lucky to bump into them at DASH.
“With those worries tabled for the moment, have you thought about toys? I mean, you got the dragon hood, but did you get him more toys? What would he like?"
"Dragons." That was easy. "He liked the crayons and coloring books too. I came home early Friday to find him playing with a few of his dragon stuffed animals. I felt bad interrupting him."
"So dragons are simply his thing," Trent said. "Travis knows where to get all the dragon toys."
Travis's head bobbed up and down. "Cal was obsessed with dragons when we first met, but over time his interest has morphed to dinosaurs. That being said, I can definitely help you find dragon toys for Grayson."
I felt my cheeks flush slightly. "Well, actually, I've taken some liberties with that offer to ship the dragon hood here."
Travis cocked an eyebrow high on his forehead. "Oh?"
I lifted my shoulders slightly and grinned. "I went through some sites over the weekend and ordered quite a bit of stuff. It should be here tomorrow or Friday at the latest. I did expedited shipping so that you don't have things showing up for weeks on end."
Travis laughed, a full-body laugh that echoed in the room. "So that explains these two boxes." He pointed toward the corner.
I ducked my head. "That's just the beginning, I'm afraid."
"It's really not a problem. You can pick them up Friday after work."
Trent groaned when Travis mentioned Friday. "I'm really not looking forward to this weekend. This snowstorm they are predicting is going to have Logan and me out all weekend, meaning Aiden's going to be home alone."
"That sucks," Travis and I said at the same time. There wasn't anything more to say about that. It would be hard to be separated from my husband.
Trent shrugged. "I think you should ship the kids to your brother's house for the night to let you two explore together. Give him a bath—Aiden loves baths. Hell, as Curious, even Logan lets me give him a bath sometimes. It's probably the most submissive thing about his personality. He loves the touch and attention."
I turned toward Travis as he began to speak again. "Baths are a great way to connect as Daddy and boy. Grayson looked like he enjoyed you giving him a snack at the club. I'm willing to bet he likes when you do things for him."
Was that true? It probably was. He liked when I got him snacks or a drink, even when I didn't ask first. He'd always liked when I took charge of what we were doing or when I inevitably sent him to bed when he was falling asleep on the couch. I'd chalked those things up to his being submissive, but maybe there was something deeper to it. "He usually does, yes. I just never thought of it that way before."
"Sounds like we've given you a lot to think about," Trent said through a yawn. "Dammit, I need to get home and sleep. My guys are both at work today, so I'll have the bed all to myself. Don't get me wrong—I love snuggling with those two, but I appreciate the times I can stretch out."
Grayson took up enough of our bed; I couldn't imagine sharing a bed with two men. "Sleep well. Thanks for coming over and talking with us."
Trent stood and headed toward the door, shoving his hat back on his head. "Not a problem at all. Welcome to the club." He winked at me then headed out the door. "Looks like Ben just pulled up," he said from the front of the office.
"Ben's my assistant," Travis said in explanation. "I guess we've been chatting longer than I realized. Time sure does fly. Do you have any other questions I can answer for you?"
I shook my head. "No, I don't think so right now. I'm going to spend the next few days doing some research. I'll probably have questions later."
"You've got our numbers, so call or text as questions arise. We're both happy to help you navigate this. We've been through it before—don't make yourself stumble along on your own. It will make the first few times you two play together a lot more enjoyable and a lot less awkward."
I couldn't help but agree with his statement. I didn't want more awkwardness between Grayson and me. We'd been dancing around the awkwardness since the night at DASH and I was over it. When we finally had the chance, I wanted Grayson to be able to enjoy himself.
Travis and I said our goodbyes and I left the office with my head in the clouds. I wasn't even sure how I made it to work that day. It was the day of the week set aside for various meetings and catching up on the never-ending chart work, and I'd never been so thankful to not have to see patients. I was hardly qualified to sit in the meetings, acting like I was paying attention, as my thoughts wandered through ways to explore the different sides of Gray.
By the end of the last meeting, I had absolutely no clue what we'd talked about. "Did you take notes?" I asked my assistant, Marcy, as we rode the elevator back to the fourth floor.
Marcy laughed lightly. "I had a feeling you were totally out of it, though I can't blame you. Dr. Marshall can drone on for what feels like days. I managed to get some notes between all his anecdotes and ramblings. Nothing big, though, so it was a good meeting to ignore. I'll email them to you when I get back from lunch."
I was going to take the out for what it was. "Thanks so much, Marcy. I'm going to go try to get through some files."
"Don't forget to eat," she said to me as we walked past her desk. She stopped to grab her bag, and I kept walking toward my office. I didn't hesitate to shut and lock the door because I already knew I wasn't going to get anything done. Instead of reaching to turn my computer on, I pulled my tablet from my bag in hopes of finding some ideas to help.
Twenty minutes later, I hadn't had any success. I huffed and traded the tablet for my phone and sent off a text to Travis and Trent. My life had taken a strange turn since walking into DASH with Grayson the last time, but I was thankful I had these two in my life to help walk me through this confusing new world. Toys were great, but they weren't going to be enough to get my husband to feel little or like a dragon.
Me: Okay, I give up. I found three dragon stuffed animals but I'm not finding anything else for Gray. Suggestions?
I was shocked to see bubbles dancing across the screen seconds later.
Trent: I get Logan a bunch of stuff from this site, and this is Aiden's favorite place for me to get clothes and some toys.
Two separate links popped up but the bubbles still danced across the bottom of the screen.
Travis: Oh, dragons are hard to find. There's a few places that have some play clothes with dragons on them, and Cal will happily take dinosaurs. This place has a good number of dragon it
ems, and more dinosaurs than I can count. But if you want this stuff fast, I'd just go find some screen print Ts and cotton shorts at the store.
Gray had found cotton shorts, and the last time I'd been in the men's section, there'd been more than enough brightly colored and patterned outfits to make me believe that the fashion industry had been taken over by toddlers.
Travis: Oh wait, I forgot about this place. Well, do you think he'll like diapers?
No link came in, and I figured he was waiting for my response.
Me: I have no idea.
Travis: Eh, they've got some cute training pants and some blankets and stuff. Maybe something will catch your eye. It's okay if he doesn't like diapers, not all age players do.
Me: Thanks, I'll have a look.
Trent: Let us know if you need anything else.
Travis: Shouldn't you be sleeping?
Trent: LOL! Remember me saying I was looking forward to having the bed to myself? I was wrong, I couldn't get comfortable without someone clinging to me.
Travis: Ah, yes, that crazy thing called love. Weird what it does to us.
Me: Grayson is like a koala in his sleep. When he's not with me, I toss and turn all night.
I plucked my tablet off my desk and started my search again, this time guided by the websites Travis and Trent linked me to. By the end of the day, I'd spent enough money that Grayson would probably have my head if he saw the credit card statement, and even with the expedited shipping, I doubted things would arrive in time. A trip to the store was going to be a must.
I should probably send Travis a bottle of whiskey or scotch to thank him for letting me use his office.
Thinking of Trent's words about his friend feeling uncomfortable playing with his kids' toys, I made a mental note to go to the store for some blocks and toys just for Grayson before things started getting here. With everything due to arrive in the next few days, I knew I wouldn't be able to hide them forever. Actually, I wasn't going to be able to hide them at all if I brought them home.
As I left the parking garage, I placed a call to my brother.
"Hey." James's voice filled the car. "Shouldn't you still be at work?"
I glanced at the clock to see it read just past four. Damn, I couldn't remember the last time I'd snuck out of the office so early. "Technically, yes. I wasn't being any use, though, and I'd been hiding out in my office all day with the door closed. I honestly thought it was closer to five. Am I catching you at a bad time?"
"Not at all. Is everything okay?"
"Everything's fine. Promise. Just trying to get something sorted out. And to that point, I was calling to ask if you and Dexter had plans this weekend. I know it's last minute but it kind of slipped my mind. I wanted to surprise Gray with… something." Damn, that sounded like I was hiding something, but I wasn't ready to tell my brother we were exploring age play. I wasn't going to let that out of the bag until Grayson decided it was okay. "I was going to see if you two would want to watch the kids for a night before I asked someone else. But I totally get it if you're not able to, especially with the snow coming."
"Oh, sounds like you've got wicked plans. I have to work Sunday for sure, but if the snow comes as bad as they're predicting, I'll probably be called out. But let me ask Dex what his plans are—" James didn't even have the words out of his mouth and I could hear Dexter asking what was going on. It was clear that James had taken the phone away from his mouth, but I could hear everything he was saying to Dexter. He barely got to the part where he said that we were looking for a babysitter for a night and Dexter was agreeing.
"Yes! Of course!" Dexter's voice rang out loud over the line, and I couldn't help but wonder if he'd snatched the phone from James.
James was the voice of reason, as always. "You don't even know when he needs someone to watch the kids."
"Does it matter?" Dexter asked immediately. "He needs someone to watch the kids, and we're nearby. So, duh."
"Friday or Saturday?"
"Yes! To both!"
He was a nut, but a sweet nut that I didn't want to shake.
I laughed into the car and James was back. "Oh my god, it's a good thing I love him. Just let us know which day works best for your surprise. We'll watch the kids."
"And the dogs! Dude, I love Runt!" Dexter yelled.
"Not the dogs!" James responded. Then he added quietly, "Unless you need us to watch the dogs, because he hasn't shut up about them since we dropped them back off at your place. Maybe, if I let him borrow your horses every once in a while, he won't get his own."
I laughed. "I'll think about the dogs. The kids are the big part. I can't believe you didn't kill him for bringing the dogs there."
James's groan was comical. "I nearly did. But he was just so damn happy. Why do you have the two biggest dogs known to man, anyway? Is there something wrong with, like, I don't know, a Labrador?"
"That's a damn good question. You'd have to ask my husband. They appeared while I was at work. Never let Gray take Dexter to an animal shelter if you don't want horses… err, dogs."
"No animal shelters, got it. Anyway, just let us know. We're happy to have them."
"Thanks so much. I'll let you know when I have more solid plans." I sighed as I disconnected the call. Things were beginning to fall into place, but I was becoming more stressed out. I worried about Grayson's reaction to all the stuff I bought. Pinching the bridge of my nose, I took a few deep breaths and reminded myself that this would all work out.
Chapter Eight
Grayson
It was official—my husband was acting weird. Not just weird but cagey, and I couldn't figure out why. For the past week, he'd been glued to his phone at random hours. I'd asked him what was up a number of times, but each time he shrugged, smiled at me, and told me he was working on a surprise. I'd become skeptical to say the very least.
Now with what the media had deemed Snowmageddon due to arrive in just a few hours, Spencer had been worrying like a mother hen all day. I'd gotten no less than ten texts from him asking if I was okay, if the snow had started falling yet, and if I needed him to pick anything else up.
When my phone pinged for the third time in two minutes, I nearly threw it across the room until I saw Dexter's name on the screen.
Dexter: What time are the kids home from school today?
Me: 2:30.
Dexter: Great. I'll be there at 2, if that's okay. I want to get them here before the snow hits.
Me: Wait, you're still taking the kids? We're getting snowed in!
Dexter: Your point? I've been looking forward to having my niece and nephew here! And whether James admits it or not, he's been cleaning the spare rooms like it's his job. He even went to the store after work yesterday and bought every single thing he could think of that the kids might need or want for the weekend… probably longer if need be.
I smiled. They had only been in our lives for a year, but in that year, our family had grown not by two but by countless more. James brought his friends, Dexter brought his, and our little four-member family had turned into a giant extended one. It sometimes felt inescapable in the best possible way.
Me: Okay, I'll see you at 2. I'll have the kids packed up.
Dexter: Great! See you then! Ohhh, I'm so excited!!!
I tossed my phone to the side and picked my laptop back up. I had a few more things I really wanted to get done before it was time to get the kids ready to go. Except now that I knew the kids weren't going to be home, ideas were swirling in my head. The dramatic sigh I let out had been totally unintentional but summed up my feelings well.
I needed to text Caleb, Logan, and Aiden, but I couldn't find my phone. Where had I tossed it to? When I stood up to find it, the blankets I'd been wrapped in came unraveled. I almost laughed at the nest I'd made over the course of the late morning. Spencer always said I would burrow if I could, and he wasn't wrong. The blankets, my favorite yellow sweater, and the knit cap I was wearing weren't keeping me very warm, even though I had
a fire going and the heat on.
Spencer was going to tell me the house was too hot when he got home.
"Oh! How did you get there?" I asked my phone when I found it on the other side of the couch, ignoring the fact that I was talking to my phone.
Me: The kids are going to be gone this weekend.
Texts started pinging my phone in rapid succession.
Caleb: Oh.
Aiden: Little time! Daddy said that as long as he and Logan don't get called in, we can have play time this weekend.
Logan: Don't count on it, A. Snowstorms are the time we almost always get called in, extra deputies or not.
Me: I guess? Maybe? Part of me feels like it's too good to be true.
Caleb: I remember feeling that way when I met Travis. Dexter kept saying it would all be fine, but I couldn't believe that he'd be able to just accept me so easily. I'm… needy.
My brows pulled together as I studied the text. He never came across as needy to me, and I saw the way Travis looked at him. Travis was usually doing things for him before he had a chance to ask… ohh, that made a lot more sense now.
Caleb: I can sense you thinking over there. If you're trying to figure out how it's going to work, all I can tell you is it will. Dexter kept telling me that it would all work out.
I could almost hear Dexter telling me the same thing and it made me smile.
Me: I know. I keep telling myself that. He has been super sweet lately.
There was a short pause and then bubbles danced across the bottom of the screen.
Aiden: Logan and I talked, we're coming over. We're going to distract you for a while.