by T. M. Meek
Abuse To intentionally harm another either physically or emotionally (by verbal insults, threats or intimidation). Abuse is always wrong to do to someone –– especially when they are weaker or more vulnerable than you (such as a man hurting a woman).
Bullying To be cruel to someone perceived to be weaker or vulnerable in some way. This can include ignoring someone because she or he is not in your clique or “invitation only” group of friends. Ignoring someone you should be kind to, someone that intends you no harm, is an act of cruelty . It also means to harass (bother) someone with intimidation, socially and emotionally. It’s a form of abuse. To use threats or insults against someone who is weaker or vulnerable primarily to intimidate them is a kind of cruelty that could border on sociopathy (a mental illness that may manifest as a lack of sympathy or empathy for the pain, suffering or sensitive feelings of someone else).
Also the act of physically harming or injuring someone is a way of bullying by violence. Bullying can also be when someone physically shoves someone or physically forces someone to do something or go someplace against her or his will. To make sexual comments to someone is to sexually harass them. Just as the prevention of bullying often requires multiple people to be unafraid to stand up and/or speak out against it often immediately as it is happening (in front of the bully and victim) sexual harassment can most effectively be reduced (especially at places of employment) when others who hear and/or see sexual harassment occurring actually speak up to the one initiating the harassment in front of others (as the harassment is occurring) and discourage it for the sake of higher and more noble ways of living that create a more harmonious environment for the benefit of everyone.
Compassion Having concern for the feelings of others who are or may be suffering and taking action to try and comfort them or otherwise reduce their pain.
Compliment A comment given sincerely and honestly that helps someone to feel better about themselves in some way (ideally to be given without manipulative expectation of some self-serving reward). Many of us don't think as much about complimenting one another since we're often barraged with the destructive examples of others (too often adults i.e. TV sitcoms, stand up comedy and talk shows) who make insults and bullying seem harmless because it's a 'form of entertainment' to cause the suffering of others or to pretend such abuse does not cause the recipients of the abuse (insults, bullying etc) any real suffering.
The world of entertainment often includes the lie that there are no negative consequences for self-serving, extreme or otherwise harmful behavior. The less we tune in to such programming and the more we spend our time and money supporting more wholesome and certainly more fun and enjoyable entertainment, the more those who peddle trashy, insulting entertainment will see that people really do prefer cleaner entertainment and better role models for children than the barrage of garbage that washes over the youth of America on a daily basis. Pretending the youth who are awash in such destructive messages will walk away unstained and unaffected will never make it a reality as much as simply replacing such messages with better examples of people getting along because they prefer lifting one another to a variety of life successes rather than tearing one another down.
Cyberbullying The action of either insulting or harassing someone through digital means (texting, social networking, etc) or not speaking out against it as it occurs (or shortly after it occurs) and thus remaining silent which lets others have the opportunity to believe you think the bullying that occurred is okay to let happen. Cyberbullying can also include the choice to ignore someone n the internet because she or he isn’t “good enough” (popular enough, well-dressed or fashionable enough or attractive enough) to be replied to by email or on a social networking site.
Honesty as a form of abuse When someone uses honesty with the intent to hurt someone else, it's not a good way to use honesty. So if someone says, "You asked me if I liked your shirt and I'm telling you that it's ugly. Look, I'm just being honest with you," that's an abuse of someone else in the name of so-called honesty (a weak justification for callousness). If you really don't like someone's shirt, try and find something about it you truly do like (maybe the only thing you like about it is the color) and compliment what you like. And if there's nothing about the shirt you like, maybe find something about their shoes or their hair that you like and can honestly compliment them on. Our world already has too many callous people in it who seem to care little for the feelings of others. Come on. We can all do better. Let's find something today we can shift gears on and restrain ourselves from being too open about for the sake of caring more for someone else's feelings than we do for our own proud, self-serving desires to be blunt or 'right' about otherwise trivial matters.
Insult A verbal comment intended to humiliate someone or cause someone to feel less valuable and often results in some degree of emotional suffering by the recipient of the insult. Even if you are only kidding when you make an insulting comment to someone else, they may not know you're kidding and most often, if they are really hurt they will try and hide it from you since for many people it's easier to act as if they are not hurt than to admit it and leave themselves emotionally vulnerable to being mocked or hurt again by the person who just hurt them by insulting them even if the insult was 'only a joke' in the name of humor. Many times females are much more easily hurt by insults spoken as a simple joke than guys are but even some guys can be hurt by insulting jokes as well. Generally speaking, people tend to be more successful socially (they get along better with others and are liked by more people) when they say honest things that help others to feel good about themselves and hopeful about their future.
Integrity A character trait that is noble; it’s honest dealings with others. When you have integrity you are trustworthy. People that have integrity are responsible, mature people that often give their very best to do good in every situation they are in.
Refined Affectionate Friendship (RAF) A refined affectionate friendship is a step above ordinary friendships into a more blissful kind of association among friends. A refined affectionate friend is someone that enjoys taking friendship to an even higher level for the ultimate fulfillment for both friends involved. This kind of friendship is primarily shared between same gender friends, most often being what women enjoy with other women. But because it’s a friendship of a much higher nature than most currently enjoy, it takes a certain level of understanding and maturity to really flourish.
It’s about pure affection (nonsexual) in a variety of expressions from simple conversation as affection to ambiance as affection and so many other forms of pure, natural affection. It takes sufficient emotional maturity and emotional intelligence to see something that is pure as pure and not twist it into something it’s not. Wisdom is hard to find in the emotionally immature and the unhealthy relationships that result are the evidence of it.
RAFs are all about enjoying healthy and therefore highly fulfilling relationships by getting back to the practice of natural affection. The acronym of R. A. F. can stand for either Refined Affectionate Friend (such as an RA-BFF) or it can stand for Refined affectionate Friendship (or R. A. Friendship) Check out the RAF wix site at Refinedaffection.wix.com/ra-friendships
Sensitivity This is much like compassion. When you are sensitive to the feelings of someone else then you show consideration for the emotions, self-esteem, likings or preferences of someone else. Sensitivity for another is a noble trait because it can be loving and selfless.
Sexting Sending sexually explicit pictures, videos, texts or other digital form of communication to another for any reason (regardless of whether or not it is intended to humiliate or otherwise harass). Sexting will always eventually bring you trouble and sorrow. It’s best to just keep your clothes on when someone asks you to send them a sext of you. The fact that someone might want you to disrobe and reveal your nakedness for their selfish satisfaction is a clear indicator that they don’t really care about you and they’re highly likely to be the first one to dump you cold when a prob
lem with that behavior arises. Just don’t do it and don’t pressure anyone else into doing it either.
Our bodies are a sacred gift from God that we really can enjoy sexually under the right circumstances (immorality – sexual relations before marriage and infidelity during marriage is never the right circumstance). You should also understand that sending a sexual picture (fully nude or partially nude image of someone's body who is under the age of eighteen) of a child is to engage in child pornography and is a felony offense that is punishable by law (which often means you go to jail for it and then you are labeled as a sex offender for the rest of your life. Most people are afraid of sex offenders and for very good reasons since most sex offenders are rapists and child molesters which are essentially those individuals who are so obsessed with sex that they break the law and commit horrible crimes against innocent victims. The difference between simple curiosity about someone’s naked body and total addiction to pornography and/or the commission of a crime against another can be just one curious look.)
DISCLAIMER
All characters portrayed herein are intended to be fictional. It is not intended to portray or identify the stories of any specific people living or dead. If you are looking for a school named North Ivy Academy in Silver Streams, Kansas, it doesn't exist as far as I know because I made it up. None of the organizations, think tanks, associations, churches, nonprofits or corporations are real in this book since I made them up (with the only exceptions being MIT, Give.org, CharityNavigator.org, U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission and the American Red Cross and companies mentioned by examples in the dictionary). But much of the information contained in this book is true as it pertains to money and religion.
As for those who are sincerely interested in learning vital truths about God the Father and His Son, Jesus Christ –– especially as it pertains to finding the truth so as to become better people and find peace with God as much truth as possible has been included. If there's one subject that is the most important to get accurate information on, it is the sacred subject of the literal living God and His literal living Son, our Savior, Jesus Christ. Therefore I have not felt at liberty to provide any other information about God, Christ and the Holy Spirit that is not what I know to be true and has been evidenced thereby through holy scripture. As far as truths about financial planning, again, I included as much truth as possible.
The information in this book is provided with the understanding that the author, company, and/or publisher are not offering these materials as medical, accounting, legal, investing, and/or tax advice as they may relate to this book. The information provided is intended for educational purposes only. Questions regarding the specific health, medical, accounting, legal, investing, and/or tax needs of the reader should be addressed to their professional advisor. Please consult with your professional advisor.
Appendix: Angels to the Rescue: The Miracles Alex Imagined in the Chapter 2 Car Accident