Not that she could have gone back to only friendship, either. No, she had to be honest with herself about that. She wanted more, now. She couldn’t even imagine going back to what they had, not without imagining what more it could be. What more it had actually been.
The scenery blurred beneath her and her throat ached. She blinked back the tears, refusing to let any more fall, because she wasn’t going to burst into sobs right now, not with a complete stranger sitting next to her. That could wait until she finally got home.
Perhaps she needed to think about other things, such as what Rhys was going to do with the guy who’d been after him. Would he kill him now she wasn’t there? No, he wouldn’t, she knew he wouldn’t. She refused to believe anything else.
He wasn’t a bad man. He was…hurt. And he hurt still, she knew it.
Some interminable time later, they finally landed at a private airfield, and once the rotors were slowing, the pilot took off his headset and turned to her, his gaze narrowed, sharp. “Name’s West. I work with Rhys at Duchess Bail Bonds. And you’re Vivienne, right?”
She handed him her own headphones and he took them, chucking them carelessly onto the second set of seats behind them. “Yes,” she said. “I’m a friend of Rhys’s.”
“Yeah, I got that.” He gave her another speculative once-over. “Want to tell me what’s going on? Why I had to fly way the hell out to Big Bend to pick you up?”
“He didn’t tell you?”
“No. Duchess gave the order to have you picked up so I did.”
She didn’t know what to say. Did his colleagues know about his past? And if they didn’t, was she the one to tell them? “Um, some stuff to do with his…past,” she said carefully.”
“Oh right.” West put his headset down on the seat beside him. “Dangerous shit then.”
“You…know?”
“That he was a hitman?” West lifted a shoulder. “Yeah. Rose found out because she likes to know things.”
“Rose?”
“Duchess’s sister. She does the skip tracing.”
Vivi frowned. “Skip tracing?”
West sighed. “Does Rhys not tell you anything about his job?”
The hurt in her chest shifted, a spike digging in. “No.”
“Well, he doesn’t talk about you, so I guess we’re even.” He frowned. “You’re really his friend?”
Another stab of pain. “Yes, I am.” She lifted her chin. “I’ve been his friend for about fifteen years.”
Surprise crossed West’s handsome face. “Shit. I didn’t realize the guy had friends.”
“Well, he does.” Defensiveness rose up inside her. “And I’m one of them.”
West’s mouth turned up in a lopsided smile and he raised a hand. “Hey, it’s fine. I’m just…surprised.”
No, she wouldn’t ask why he hadn’t talked about her to his work colleagues. No, it didn’t matter. She thought she might know why anyway. Knowing Rhys it was probably because he wanted to protect her.
Perhaps that’s why he sent you away? Perhaps that’s why he shut you out?
Her breath caught, something cold and clear and diamond bright settling inside her.
Of course that was why. That’s what he’d been doing this whole time. He’d pushed her away not because he didn’t want her friendship, but because he was trying to keep her safe.
From him.
The stupid bastard. How many times had she told that him he wasn’t that guy? That she knew him? She knew him better than anyone else and certainly better than he goddamned knew himself.
But he refused to believe her, he refused to see.
Well, she was done with accepting his limited and narrow viewpoint. Done with doing everything he told her. And she was certainly done with him protecting her.
She’d accused him of simply giving up, but it was her who’d gotten into the chopper and left him with only a cursory protest. She’d given up fighting as much as he had.
So. No more.
If he thought she was worth protecting, then she thought he was worth fighting for.
“I have to go back,” she murmured, half to herself.
“What did you say?”
She lifted her head, stared at West. “I have to go back,” she repeated, louder this time. “I have to.”
This time it was West’s turn to blink. “What?”
“To Big Bend.” She wasn’t going to bother explaining it to this guy. She just had to find Rhys. Now. “I have to get back to Rhys.”
He was eyeing her as if she’d gone temporarily insane. “You sure you’re okay? You’re not dehydrated or anything?”
She could see how it looked, here she was sitting in a helicopter in a pair of pajamas she’d been wearing for a few days straight, with a blanket wrapped around her. Having been picked up inexplicably from a cabin in the middle of nowhere. Yes, she must look like a crazy woman. But she didn’t care. “No, I just…have to find him. Please.”
West muttered a curse under his breath. “This isn’t a bus service you know.”
Vivi set her jaw. “Are you his friend?”
“I'm not sure what you mean…”
“You either are or you aren’t,” she snapped. “Which is it?”
Something flicked over West’s face that she didn’t catch. Then he muttered another curse. “It’s been a couple of hours and I’m gonna have to refuel. That’ll take another hour or so. Is he staying at that cabin?”
Vivi’s heart was going faster and faster, the frantic need to get to him almost overwhelming, leaving her clutching at her stupid blanket. “I don’t know,” she said, because she didn’t. “Probably not.”
West let out a breath. “Sorry darlin’, I’m not sure how we’re gonna track him down then.”
Oh God. The need tightened. “Can’t we just…fly along the highway or something?”
“You’re kidding me, right? He’ll be on his way back soon. Better just to wait until then.”
Vivi sucked in a breath. “No. I need to go now.”
West’s blue eyes narrowed. “Look, we can’t—”
“He’s trying to protect me,. He thinks he’s bad. And he’s…not. And I have to get to him, I have to find him. I have to tell him he’s not any of those t-things.” Her voice was wobbling and she didn’t care. “Please, West. If you care about him, please.”
West stared at her for a long moment, the expression on his face unreadable. Then he said, “Stay here.” Without a word, he got out of the helicopter and walked away a little, getting out his phone and punching a few buttons before raising it to his ear.
Vivi lifted a shaking hand, wiping away her tears, but more were coming. She didn’t know why she felt so frantic, she just did, and every second felt like a lifetime until West put his phone away and abruptly turned back to the helicopter, striding toward it. He got in, reached for his headset. “Put your seatbelt on,” he said as he fitted the headset back on his head. “There’s an airfield not far from Terlingua where I can refuel. Should have enough to get there at least.” He reached for the ignition. “Let’s go find this stupid bastard.”
The car wouldn’t go fast enough. But then maybe it was a good thing since there were laws against speeding and everything. Even so, Rhys kept his radar on and put his foot down wherever he could. He had to get to back to Austin as quickly as possible and every minute was an unacceptable delay.
He hated the thought of all the time that was passing where Vivi thought he didn’t care. That he didn’t want to be her friend anymore. That the fact that she loved him didn’t matter.
All that pain… he hated being the cause and every fucking second it took him to get back to her was an agony.
It nearly killed to him to have to stop for gas, but eventually he had to, because obviously running out of gas while out in the middle of nowhere was only going to make things take even longer.
As he drove along the highway, squinting at what looked like a gas station coming up on his left, he b
ecame conscious of the sound of rotor blades. Like there was helicopter flying very low in his vicinity.
Sure enough, the round body of a helicopter flew over his car, going in the same direction as he was. He frowned at it, wondering what the fuck it was doing going so low and so near the goddamn road. Then he stared at it. Hard. Because it was familiar. Very, very familiar.
It was West’s battered piece of shit Robinson.
What the fuck was he doing? Why? And more important than anything else: where the hell was Vivi?
Rhys pulled on the wheel, the car swerving over to the side of the road, tires screeching and sliding on the gravel as he came to a stop. And he reached for his phone, a cold and terrible fear sitting in his gut.
But then the helicopter was touching down on the flat, scrubby ground not far from the side of the road, and someone was getting out. A figure wrapped in a blanket, chestnut hair flying out behind her as she ducked under the rotors, running toward his car.
Coming toward him.
Vivi.
He threw away the phone, not caring where it landed, pushing open his door and getting out, taking a few unbelieving steps and then stopping because it seemed impossible that she was here, that she was flying over the ground toward him.
But it was possible, because then she was there and her arms were around him, and she was holding onto him like she was drowning and he was the only one who could save her, pressing herself against him, her breath hot against his throat as she buried her face in his neck.
“Vivi.” Her name was hoarse and ragged, but he couldn’t make it sound any different. “What the hell are you doing? Why are you here?”
The helicopter roared, lifting up into the sky, leaving them standing on the side of the road.
Rhys didn’t even watch as it left. Somehow Vivi was here and he didn’t know how or why, but maybe that didn’t matter. What mattered was that she was holding onto him as if he hadn’t ever hurt her. As if he hadn’t destroyed a friendship that had taken fifteen years to build.
And his arms were coming around her, holding her as tightly as she was holding him, one hand tangling in the softness of her hair, tipping her head back. There were tears on her face and he couldn’t bear it. He kissed them away then he kissed her mouth, deep and desperate, hard and long, letting it say everything he couldn’t.
Because nothing mattered. Nothing mattered anymore, but this.
Eventually though, they both had to come up for air, and he had to speak. “What are you doing here and how did you find me?” he demanded. “You were supposed to go back to Austin.”
“I did.” Her voice was as hoarse and as ragged as his. “West took me back. But then we got there and I realized that I’d accused you of not fighting, while at the same time just getting into that stupid helicopter and leaving you with only a token protest.” Her arms tightened around his neck. “I couldn’t stand it. West got Rose to track your cellphone. Because I had to come back. I couldn’t leave you thinking that a killer is all you’d ever be. I know you.” Her voice became fierce, a gold light burning in her eyes. “I know you, Rhys Fox. Better than you do. And you’re just going to have to trust me that no matter how bad you think you are, you’re not—”
“I know,” he interrupted quietly. “I know you do.”
“What do you mean you know?”
He shifted her closer, fitting her even more firmly against him, unable to stand any space between them. “I gave Jason my Sig. Told him to take a free shot.”
Her eyes went wide, color draining from her face. “You did what?”
“I thought that’s how the story should end. The bad guys always die, that’s how it works.”
“No, Rhys—”
Shifting his hold, he laid a finger over her mouth, stopping her words. “But apparently that bastard didn’t agree with me. He told me he never wanted me dead in the first place and that killing me wouldn’t change anything. Then he climbed into the truck and drove away instead.”
A tear gleamed on her cheek. “You’re an idiot,” she said thickly, her mouth soft against his finger. “You’re not the bad guy. How many times do I have to tell you that? What do I have to do to make you see it?”
His chest was hurting, but this time it was a good pain. A sweet pain. “I know you see it. That’s why I had to come back to you. I thought I couldn’t escape the past, but fucking Jason… Shit, if he could make the choice not to shoot me, then I could make a choice, too. I could choose to step away from my past.” He cupped her face between his palms, wiping away the tears with his thumbs. “I could choose you.”
Another couple more tears slid down the side of her face. “Oh, Rhys…”
“I want to be the man you see when you look at me, Vivi. I want to be that guy so fucking badly. But I don’t want to fail you. I don’t ever want to disappoint you.”
She leaned close to him, rising on her toes, kissing his mouth, her lips warm and soft and forgiving against his. “You won’t,” she whispered. “You can’t. You’re that man already.”
He couldn’t speak then, just held her, because words had never been his thing and the feeling in his heart seemed too big for anything as small as a word.
“I love you,” she said, as if she didn’t care how small the words were. As if all that wonderful, terrible feeling could be held within three little syllables. “I love you, Rhys Fox. And you’ve never failed me. Not once.”
“I nearly did. Back in the desert. But then I realized that I couldn’t leave you. I couldn’t let all you’ve done for me, all that faith in me, mean nothing.” He stared down at her, into those beautiful eyes of hers. Into her bright, beautiful soul. “Besides, I have something to give back to you.”
“Oh?” Her voice was croaky and there were tears on her face, but she was smiling and it was brighter than the big Texas sun.
“This.” He didn’t want to let her go, but he did. Stepping back. “Turn around.”
She gave him a puzzled look, but did as she was told.
He took her necklace out of his pocket and gently laid it around her neck, sweeping her hair to the side then doing up the catch. And this time he bent and kissed the exposed, vulnerable skin of her nape.
She shivered and turned back to him, her fingers going to her name, glittering where it should be, against her throat. And in her eyes there was the answer to every question he’d ever had.
So, he decided to try those words out for size. “I love you, Vivi.”
And it turned out they fit.
Like a glove.
She smiled, stepping into the circle of his arms, back where she belonged. “So what now? I don’t want to go home, Rhys. Not yet.”
He held her tight. “Don’t worry. I’ll just kidnap you again.”
“Help.” She snuggled closer. “I’m being kidnapped. Someone save me.”
But no one did.
Not even four hours later, back in the cabin out in the middle of nowhere, as he divested her of the pajamas and blanket that were, by now, starting to look more than a little grubby. Or when he laid her out naked on the bed, and got rid of his own clothes. Or even when he settled himself between her thighs and stretched out on top of her, so they were skin to skin, heart to heart.
“No one’s going to save you,” he murmured as she wound her arms around his neck. “You know that, right?”
She sighed, arching up into him, surrounding him in softness and heat. “Then I guess my only option is seducing my kidnapper into letting me go.”
He nuzzled against her throat, inhaling her sweet scent, his mouth brushing the necklace that made her his. “He might not want to let you go. He might want to keep you forever.”
Vivi sighed. “That’s a risk I’m willing to take.”
“Risk away.” He looked down as he positioned himself against her slick flesh, loving the feel of her. “You’re still mine.”
There was a deep, golden glow burning in her eyes. “Then I suppose I’ll have to stay kidn
apped. What a terrible thing it is to be the prisoner of a hot ex-hitman with amazing abs, who keeps me insensible with orgasms.”
He had to kiss her then, covering her smart, sexy mouth with his, feeling the last remnants of that darkness inside him ebb away. And as he began to push into her, the heat of her bringing him home, he murmured, “I knew it. Sometimes the bad guy does get the girl.”
Vivi let out a little gasp, lifting her hips to meet his. Then she closed her legs around his waist and whispered in his ear, “Or maybe you were just the good guy all along.”
Epilogue
“And this is Rose Hammond,” Rhys said, indicating a bouncy young woman sitting behind the desk, a wealth of blond curls spilling down her back. “She’s Duchess’s sister.”
“Also skip-tracer extraordinaire and pretty good at tracking down stupid bastards who don’t want to be found.” Rose gave Vivi a tiny finger wave. “Hey. Good to meet you at last.”
Vivi smiled at her. “Nice to meet you at last, too.”
“And you know West,” Rhys went on, indicating the familiar helicopter pilot standing behind Rose. “And this is Nora, my colleague.”
Nora, another small blonde, who looked like she could take on an entire army by herself, gave Vivi a nod. “Hey.”
“And Duchess,” Rhys said, indicating the slender, pencil-skirted woman who was leaning her hip against Rose’s desk, and who looked more like a lawyer than she did boss of a bail bond business.
“Hi Vivienne,” Duchess said, giving her a smile. “Like Rose said, it’s good to meet you.”
And it was.
Two weeks after she and Rhys had returned from Big Bend, and they were still finding their way in their new relationship. There were still lots of things that needed to be sorted out, such as living arrangements for example. Rhys was adamant that Vivi’s loft wasn’t safe and that they needed to find somewhere more defensible, while she thought he was overreacting—
But anyway. One of the big deals was that Rhys was finally bringing her to meet his work friends — under some pressure from her, it had to be said. She knew how big of a thing that was because he hadn’t let go of her hand since they’d stepped into the Duchess Bail Bond office, not once.
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