by Zoe Matthews
“It is so nice to see all of you,” Laura said with a twinkle in her eyes. It was clear to Barbara these were close friends of hers. “This is my cousin, Barbara Conway. She came for a visit just a few days ago.”
Barbara was introduced to each of them, and they greeted her the same as they had Laura, with a kiss to the cheek. Barbara appreciated how welcome and comfortable they made her feel. She let Laura lead the conversation; she didn’t want to say something that wasn’t proper or give clues that she was from the future.
The song that many couples had been dancing to ended then, and Barbara was grateful that they wouldn’t have to yell over the music for a moment. Suddenly Laura and her friends became silent as they looked over her shoulder and she sensed a presence behind her. She turned around to see Mr. Baldwin. She curtsied to him again, not sure if she needed to or not, but she didn’t want to offend him. One of the things she noticed was that the women were constantly curtsying to pretty much everyone they met.
“Miss Conway, would you do me the honor of the next dance?” Mr. Baldwin asked very formally.
Barbara was stunned. She had been hoping to dance with Daniel, but hadn’t anticipated dancing with anyone else. She didn’t want to dance with Mr. Baldwin. The calculating look in his eyes when he gazed at her made her very uncomfortable.
“I’d be delighted,” she found herself saying, even though she wanted to tell him no. Something inside her told her she shouldn’t refuse.
He gave her a toothy grin. “I’ll come and retrieve you when the next dance set starts.” He then sauntered off.
She was relieved that it would be another five or ten minutes before they announced the next song, but she wished she could avoid dancing with Mr. Baldwin.
She glanced back at Laura and her friends who were looking at her cautiously. Laura was the one to speak what they all seemed to be thinking. “You should be careful around him, Barbara. He isn’t always on his best behavior, especially when there are good drinks around.”
Barbara shuddered at Laura’s advice and nodded. “It’s just one dance. But I will be careful and come right back here once the dance is over.”
Her words seemed to appease Laura a little, and she went back to her conversation with her friends. Barbara tuned the conversation out, as she tried to rehearse the ballroom classes in her mind that her parents had insisted she take when she was younger.
Within a few minutes, she saw the musicians gather together again, and felt a thick hand at her elbow. She glanced over at Mr. Baldwin and took the arm that he offered to her. She saw that a line was forming, with all the men on one side, and all the women on the other. The music started, and each couple danced their way down the room through a series of repeated steps, intertwining with the couple behind them several times. She watched them carefully and soon felt confident that she could follow the steps herself once it was their turn to join the line. She was glad that she wasn’t going to be required to dance the waltz with Mr. Baldwin. With this particular dance, she only touched his hand a few times.
She was able to keep up with only a few clumsy steps. She felt proud of herself for catching on so quickly, but only got a glare from Mr. Baldwin. She was glad the style of dance did not allow for any conversation between herself and Mr. Baldwin. She danced until she was panting and finally the song came to an end. She stayed several feet from Mr. Baldwin and curtsied in his direction before turning as calmly as she could and walking back to Laura and her group of friends. She could feel Mr. Baldwin watching her, almost as if he was sending daggers into her back. Her heart pounded in her chest, and she knew it was for a reason other than being out of breath from the dance.
The other women happily greeted her again, and Laura looked relieved as she handed Barbara a glass of water. Barbara was grateful it was water, as she needed a drink badly, but didn’t want to drink wine or champagne. Laura seemed to have picked up on this, probably because Barbara always left her glass full during meals.
“I am glad Mr. Baldwin let you get away so easily. I have heard stories of things he has attempted with different ladies,” she said quietly.
“He did seem quite unhappy about something,” Barbara responded. She didn’t want to get into any details about what Mr. Baldwin had attempted with other ladies; she could imagine well enough herself.
After she’d had several minutes to recover, Daniel approached her. She tried and failed to hide the large smile that spread across her lips.
“It has come to my attention that you are a fair dancer, Miss Conway.” He bowed to her formally.
She curtsied back, not sure if he was teasing her, or if it was expected of her to curtsy as well. She laughed. “How could a gentleman know for sure unless he has had the opportunity to dance with her as well?” She surprised herself; she wasn’t usually so forward.
“I quite agree. Will you dance with me during the next song?” he requested with a glint of happiness in his eyes.
“I’d be delighted,” she replied as she had to Mr. Baldwin, but this time she meant it with all her heart.
Seeing the group of musicians gather again, he took her arm and led her onto the floor. She could see couples gathering together into circles in groups of six.
A wave of nerves hit her; she wouldn’t have the opportunity to watch the other dancers first before it was her turn to start dancing. She had no idea what type of dance this would be.
Daniel led her to a circle with two other couples, making it complete once they joined the group. The music started slowly, and she sensed this would be a slow song. Everyone stood still for a few moments, listening to the opening lines. She watched carefully for any movements and saw the ladies shift as if readying themselves to start dancing.
The ladies raised their hands into the circle, and stepped in close together, while the men held still, then turned in a smaller circle inside the larger circle of men. Barbara was only a moment behind, which earned her curious glances from the other women. Barbara ignored the looks, and through by watching the ladies carefully, was able to keep up with the slow pace of the song.
She was grateful when the women stepped back into their places in the outer circle, and the men stepped inside to start their turn dancing. She watched Daniel and admired how graceful and calm he was. His strong shoulders made it seem as though he should only be able to move with purpose, but he clearly knew how to be very gentle.
The dance continued and repeated itself several times. Daniel and Barbara did not talk, even though they had plenty opportunity to. They only watched each other, speaking their emotions through quiet glances and soft touches. Barbara had never done or seen anything so romantic in her entire life. It felt like their souls were touching, were communicating. It reminded her of when she held the locket for the first time. She wished they were alone. She had things she wanted to say, to tell him. But would he believe them? Words could wait, but the feelings were so strong, and powerful. Their fingers touched often during the dance and each time a tingle traveled through her down to her toes. As the final notes of the music faded, it felt as though Barbara were coming back down from a cloud. She clapped along with everyone else in the room, then turned back to Daniel.
How could she have such strong emotions so quickly? She felt as though she could love him. She shook herself slightly. Not love. Not yet.
Daniel held his arm out to her, and she took it, letting him lead her back to Laura and her group of friends. He then bowed and excused himself.
She looked back at the group with dreamy eyes, and the women giggled and teased her. Barbara only smiled at them, not letting the teasing take away from such an amazing moment. She tucked these new feelings deep down inside to be thought of later when she was alone.
The dance continued for another hour or so without event. Some of the other women left to dance several times, but they all came back after each dance. Barbara was relieved when she didn’t see Mr. Baldwin again.
Laura hid a yawn behind her hand, and
Barbara noticed how pale she had started to look. “Are you feeling alright?” Barbara asked her quietly.
“I am a bit tired. I wonder if I am turning into an old maid early,” she said with a chuckle, trying to lighten the mood, but Barbara knew she really wasn’t feeling well. “It would seem I am ready to retire already. It was so pleasant to spend the evening with all of you.” She said her farewells to her friends, and Barbara followed suit, kissing cheeks with each of them.
As they walked away from the group, Laura’s face seemed about to crumble with exhaustion. “We need to track down Daniel and fetch the carriage.” She seemed to be talking more to herself than to Barbara.
Barbara instantly took charge. “I can do that. You sit on this chair. I will be back with Daniel.”
Barbara waited until Laura was settled, and started scanning the crowds for Daniel. She did remember seeing him head out one of the doors to the left of the room, and wondered if he was still there.
She walked through the same set of doors to find an empty hall. She hesitated. Would it be considered rude to wander the halls in search of Daniel? She remembered the look on Laura’s face and sighed. She needed to get home; Daniel would want her to come find him.
She tried to walk confidently and listened for voices every time she walked past a door. Everything seemed quiet; Daniel must not be down here. She turned to go and found a short man standing in her path. She looked more closely in the dim light of the hallway and recognized Mr. Baldwin.
“Excuse me.” She curtsied, and tried to slip past him, her heart racing.
“I don’t think you should be down here.” His face seemed angry, but his eyes told her he was hungry-- and it wasn’t hard could guess for what as he looked her up and down.
“Are you lost? Let me help you,” he sneered as he grabbed her arm, and forced her into a room nearby.
A quick glance around told her it was a library. She turned around to face him. “Please let me go. I need to find Daniel. It is time for us to be headed back. His sister is ill.”
“You aren’t from around here, are you? I can tell you are trying hard to play the part, but I can see right through you.”
Barbara’s breath caught in her throat. Could he somehow know her secret? She didn’t respond and just waited for him to say something else. She reminded herself that she had taken classes and knew how to defend herself if he started to get aggressive.
“A woman your age should be married. If you are not... That would mean your family couldn’t carry your weight. Am I right? Did they leave you to make your own way? And what better way to do that than to offer your services to rich men?”
Disgust washed through her as she realized what he was suggesting. “You are wrong.”
“Ah, you want a price before you commit to a side job, is that right?” He took a step forward and reached for her arm.
She automatically crouched down a little in a defensive position.
“Ah, so you do have a wild side, don’t you? I knew it. You must be a prostitute from the city. I knew Daniel would break one day and take advantage of all that money he has. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind if I had a little taste for myself.” He moved more quickly this time and grabbed her arm, holding on to her tightly.
Flashbacks of what happened when she was younger started to overtake her. She took a deep breath and cleared her head.
She thought back to the self-defense training she had taken when Megan was still young, and let those memories overcome her instead.
Her free arm shot forward and connected with his nose, pushing it up and into his forehead with the heel of her hand. He cried out in pain, and held his nose, which was now gushing blood. He smeared some of the blood with his hand and turned furious eyes toward her.
“Oh, you will wish you hadn’t of done that,” he growled as he started forward again. She kneed him in the groin, and he flew forward in pain. Now that they were within easy reach, she jabbed his eyes with her fingers. He recoiled, holding his eyes this time, and she ruthlessly kneed his groin again. He doubled over and she slipped past him and ran out of the room.
She almost lashed out again as she ran into another man, but she stopped when she felt gentle arms enclose her protectively. She looked up to see it was Daniel who had found her, and she started shaking as the adrenaline started to wear off.
Daniel just looked shocked and confused, and she realized he had witnessed her defend herself against Mr. Baldwin. Women in this era weren’t supposed to act in such a way; they were never taught self-defense, or permitted to fight for sport. She lowered her head. How was she going to explain this?
****
The ride home in the carriage seemed to take twice as long as it should have. Laura was still pale, and as soon as Daniel had realized she needed to get home, he had switched his entire attention to his sister. He hadn’t looked at Barbara once.
Barbara’s mind raced with everything that had happened in the last hour. She was worried for Laura; she knew something wasn’t quite right, and wasn’t sure she had the knowledge needed to fix it.
She was also worried that Daniel would start to believe Edward; she wouldn’t be a proper woman to spend time with.
She tried not to think about what had actually happened with Mr. Baldwin. It was hard not to notice the irony. She had left one era with a man who was stalking her, only to go into another where she met a man who had wanted to assault her. She had to continually remind herself that she had taken care of herself; she had stopped him from hurting her. That was all that mattered.
They finally pulled up in front of Daniel’s estate. Barbara let Daniel help Laura out of the carriage so she could get inside first before she stepped out of the carriage herself. She quietly watched as Daniel scooped Laura up in his arms and quickly carried her into the house.
Loneliness coursed through her. Of course she wanted Daniel to focus on his sister when she needed it. She only wished that there was someone who cared enough for her, who could be there for her when she needed it.
She saw herself to her own room and dreaded tomorrow. She didn’t know what she was going to say to Daniel. Could she tell him the truth? Would he even believe her? She lay down and closed her eyes, knowing as she did so that she wouldn’t sleep well.
Only one thought circulated through her head:
I don’t want to lose Daniel’s trust.
Chapter 11
The next morning, Barbara was up early. She hadn’t slept well and had finally gotten up to stare out of her window. She was grateful that her maid, Eliza, had chosen to check on her early. She was ravenous and wanted to get dressed quickly so she could eat some breakfast, but knew she wouldn’t be able to get herself dressed properly. She needed Eliza’s help.
She was at the breakfast table as the sun rose, fidgeting nervously the entire time. She knew Daniel was usually up early as well and anticipated seeing him at the table for breakfast. She brought her bag with her, filled with items of “proof” that she was from the future, in case she needed them.
She had made a decision early this morning about what she should tell Daniel. She only hoped it was the right thing to do. She heard heavy footsteps approaching and braced herself. As she had predicted, Daniel came in, ready for the day. He stopped walking for a moment when he saw her, then continued to his normal chair at the table.
“I trust you slept well?” he asked formally, and she knew he was still unsure about what had happened last night.
“Yes,” Barbara lied, then found herself admitting the truth. “Well, not much, actually. How is Laura?”
“She is fine. Resting always helps her,” he answered.
The food was brought to their table now, and the conversation stopped while they both filled their plates.
“I would like to explain what happened last night.” Barbara tried to sound confident.
Daniel said nothing, just looked up at her cautiously.
“Mr. Baldwin was threatening to force himself on m
e,” she started, just as she had rehearsed. “I had two choices, to let him do as he wished, or to stop him. I chose to protect myself.”
Daniel was watching her skeptically, not touching his food. “I know Mr. Baldwin is not a respectable man.”
Barbara nodded in agreement. “I am sure you are wondering how I know how to protect myself in such a way?”
Daniel’s eyes seemed even more guarded as he waited for her to continue.
“I have taken lessons that are designed especially for women, so they know how to protect themselves against unrespectable men.”
“I have never heard of such a thing,” Daniel said with disgust in his voice.
“No, I’m sure you have not. I was not born here. I was born in a different place… In a different time.” Her voice wavered; this is where she was unsure of how to explain herself. She looked up at him to see if he had understood what she was saying.