The Protector: The Complete C.I.A. Romance Series

by Lilian Monroe

  Her loyalties laid with me. And mine with her. I swore a silent oath to myself, lying in that hospital bed, to protect Cat Crawford with everything I had. So far, I’d lied to her and failed her, and potentially put her in more danger than she was in to begin with.

  From now on, things would change. My mission had shifted and I had a singular focus now. I would find the people who were targeting us, and I would eliminate them. I would make sure that Cat was safe, no matter what.

  I closed my eyes and kissed her forehead. She exhaled softly, and then her breathing became more regular. She fell asleep on my chest as my heart thumped for her.

  Everything had shifted. There was no more doubt in my mind, and no more hesitation in my heart. Cat was mine, and I was hers, and I would do everything in my power to keep her safe.

  Now, I just had to figure out who was after her… or me.

  Then I had to stop them.

  19

  Cat

  I woke up in the middle of the night with a crick in my neck and my left arm completely numb. I rolled off the bed, catching myself against the wall as I tried to wake my arm up. Pins and needles started to tingle at my fingertips as I smacked my arm to increase the blood flow.

  When I could feel my hand again, I opened and closed my fist and swore under my breath. Bennett slept peacefully in the tiny hospital bed and I took a deep breath.

  I knew I wouldn’t sleep again.

  So, instead of trying, I rolled a chair close to the bed and sat down. Glancing at the clock, I saw it was just after 3am. My stomach rumbled. I hadn’t eaten since lunchtime the day before. After all the excitement of the attack, I hadn’t wanted to look at food, but now all the adrenaline had worn off.

  I was starving.

  On Bennett’s bedside table, there was a fruit cup and some cheese and crackers. They’d been sitting there since the nurse brought them over at least six hours ago, but I still tore into them and ate the warm cheese and stale crackers.

  “Sorry, Bennett,” I whispered. I inhaled the cheese and crackers, but it only seemed to make me hungrier. The nurse had told me not to disturb anyone, but she hadn’t told me I couldn’t try to find a vending machine. I grabbed my purse, which I’d thankfully had the presence of mind to bring with me, and I went off in search of some snacks. An agent sitting outside Bennett’s room glanced at me sleepily and then looked away.

  The hospital hallways were quiet. A nurse was at the nurses’ station, and she glanced at me briefly before returning her eyes to her screen. Another nurse wheeled her blood pressure machine from one room to another, but apart from that there was no noise in the ward. I wandered down the hallway until I found a bank of vending machines.

  There were two vending machines and a coffee machine, and my mouth started to water. I looked at my choices of candy, chocolate, tins of tuna, chips, pretzels, and my stomach rumbled again. I didn’t even care what I got. I mashed the buttons and used my card to get half a dozen different things. Tearing into a packet of Skittles, I put a handful of them in my mouth before glancing up.

  Someone was watching me from the end of the hall… and I knew who it was.

  “Kowalski,” I said under my breath. We stared at each other as seconds ticked by. I swallowed my mouthful of Skittles as I watched him. His fist opened and closed, and I could see the tension rippling in his body.

  I took off at a sprint toward him. It took him a second to react, and I made up precious ground before he disappeared down a hallway. He was surprisingly quick for an older man.

  As I approached the corner, I heard a yell and a crash. My heart thumped as a few voices yelled out. My feet slapped against the tile floors as I struggled to make it to the end of the hall.

  When I rounded the corner, all I could see was carnage. A trolley of medical supplies had been knocked to the ground, and its contents were spewed all over the hallway. The far door slammed as Kowalski disappeared through it. Half a dozen nurses appeared as the agent outside Bennett’s door jogged toward the exit.

  I picked my way through the mess, avoiding the vitriolic gaze of the night shift nurses. Glancing at the agent, I knew Kowalski was long gone. I ducked back into Bennett’s room. He was still fast asleep, and I breathed a sigh of relief. The machine by his bed beeped steadily and his chest rose and fell at regular intervals.

  I slumped into the chair again and took a deep breath. Things were getting out of control. To be attacked at the safe house, and then followed to the hospital…

  It was starting to make me angry. Who were these men to intrude on my life like this?! How dare they come at me in my first few weeks as Senator and threaten my life, not to mention Bennett’s and the rest of the team? I grabbed a few forgotten Skittles from the open bag and munched on them angrily.

  “You’ll break a tooth if you keep chewing like that.” Bennett shifted in bed. His eyes gleamed as he grinned at me.

  I sighed. “Kowalski was here.”

  “What?” He sat up, rubbing his eyes to wake up. He winced and put a hand to his side. I grimaced. Maybe I shouldn’t have told him. I should have let him sleep—he obviously needed it.

  I extended the bag of skittles toward him, but he shook his head. I popped another one in my mouth, chewing a bit more gently this time.

  “What was he doing?”

  I shrugged. “I went to the vending machine. He was watching me, and then he ducked down the hallway away from your room. The other agent went to chase him.”

  Bennett rubbed his forehead and I sighed. I glanced at him, shaking my head.

  “I’m sick of this, Bennett. What did I do to deserve this? I’ve lived as honestly as I can, and I’ve never broken the law. What do they want from me? Who are they? What’s going on?”

  Bennett grimaced, sighing heavily. “If I knew, I’d tell you,” he finally said. “I don’t know what’s going on. At first, I thought it might have something to do with Senator Blanchet.”

  “Blanchet?” I frowned. “He’s in prison, isn’t he? Why would this have anything to do with him? I took his place, sure, but why does that make me a target? If they get rid of me, it’s not like they can put him back in charge.”

  “I know.” Bennett sighed. I could sense that he was holding something back from me, but I didn’t know what it was. He took another deep breath and glanced at the far wall.

  I wanted him to talk to me. I wanted him to open up to me, to tell me what he was thinking, to be honest with me. I wanted to share his burden.

  But he didn’t.

  He sat quietly, mulling over his thoughts and leaving me on the outside. I wasn’t sure why it bothered me so much. Chris Bennett was one of the bravest, most fearless people I’d ever met. He’d put his life on the line multiple times for me, and up until a few weeks ago, I hadn’t even known he existed.

  I wanted to share that load.

  And I wanted to figure out who these fuckers were… and what they wanted with me. Determination and anger starting mingling in my blood. I huffed, standing up and pacing the room. Bennett watched me quietly. I glanced at him and stopped.

  “What if there’s no fighting this?” I said quietly. “What if there’s someone out there who wants to cause me harm, and until I step down as Senator, this kind of thing is going to keep happening?”

  “Cat…”

  “I’m serious. I was never one to shy away from a fight—lord knows I wouldn’t have gone into politics if I was afraid of that—but what if this is just too much? Look at you! You’ve been sliced open on my behalf, and now there are men creeping around the hospital hallways looking for me.”

  “I think they’re looking for me,” he said quietly. He kept his eyes staring straight ahead at the far wall.

  I gaped at him. My mouth opened and closed again, and my eyebrows drew together in a frown. I took a step toward him.

  “What?”

  “I think being near me is what’s putting you in danger.” He dragged his eyes to mine, and I saw deep sadness and pain
swimming in them.

  I shook my head. “That doesn’t make any sense, Bennett. What does Kowalski want from you?”

  “I don’t know yet, but I don’t think I should be close to you. I just thought of it tonight before we fell asleep.”

  My heart thumped and tears stung my eyes. I shook my head. “That doesn’t… I don’t… Bennett…”

  His face twisted, as if me saying his name hurt him. I took a step forward and he glanced at me again.

  “You weren’t what I thought you’d be,” he said.

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “I thought it would be easy to do my job, but it’s not. You’re too…” He exhaled, closing his eyes. He brought his hands to his face and rubbed it up and down.

  “I’m too what?” I took another step toward the bed and trailed my fingers over his leg. My breath caught in my throat as he finally looked me in the eye again.

  “You’re too good.”

  He stared at me, as if there were a million things he was leaving unsaid. He caught my hand in his and pressed it to his cheek, closing his eyes and leaning into me.

  “I’m sorry, Cat,” he whispered.

  “Sorry for what?”

  He took a deep, shaking breath and then glanced at the door. As if they had some unspoken connection, the other agent stepped into the opening. The two of them exchanged a long look, and then the agent in the doorway nodded to me.

  “I’ll take you home, Senator.”

  “What? No. I’m staying here.”

  “Cat, please,” Bennett said. His face twisted and he shook his head from side to side. “It’s not safe for you beside me.”

  “Tell me what’s going on.”

  “York will take you home,” he said quietly. He still hadn’t let go of my hand. He placed a kiss in the center of my palm, and then nodded to me. “You need to go.”

  I wanted to scream. I wanted to strangle him. I wanted to stand there and demand answers from him until he told me what the hell was going on.

  But I didn’t. I stared at him for a few moments as my heart broke, shattering slowly in my chest as Bennett looked away.

  Then I slung my purse over my shoulder and walked out the door.

  20

  Chris

  I hoped to hell that I was right about this. Watching Cat walk away from me was harder than I ever expected it to be, but I had to do it.

  This operation had started to sniff out any Russian involvement in Cat Crawford’s appointment as Senator. But ever since the attack on her brother, I knew there was something else going on.

  The only way to find out for sure who the target was—Senator Crawford, or me—was to separate us. That meant Cat was going to be vulnerable, but that was a risk I had to take.

  If I was right, it meant that me being near her was actually putting her in danger.

  Now that I was sure she had nothing to do with Senator Blanchet or the Russians, my own personal mission had shifted. I wanted to keep her safe. I wanted to keep her alive. I wanted to keep her mine.

  And the only way to do that was to send her away and deal with these threats on my own. Once this was all over, I would tell her everything. I would tell her my real name. I would tell her about the CIA. I would be completely, 100% honest with her, and I hoped she would come back to me.

  But for now, I had to stay away.

  After Cat and York left, Finch appeared in the doorway. Dawn was starting to peek through the blinds, and the room was brightening up. He had deep, purple circles under his eyes and his face was lined with tiredness.

  “Anders,” he nodded.

  “Hey, Finchey.”

  “How you feeling?”

  “Better than you, by the looks of it.”

  Finch snorted. “Berk had us trailing leads all night. We lost Kowalski a few hours ago, which I guess is when he was able to come here. Thought I’d check up on you before I headed home for some sleep.”

  “Thanks, man.”

  He sat down in a chair next to my bed, casting his eyes over the IV bag, the machinery, the cheap hospital linens. He sighed.

  “Not exactly glamorous in here, is it?”

  “I’ve slept in worse places.”

  He chuckled, and then glanced at me. “So, what do you make of this whole thing? Who are these guys and what do they want with the senator?”

  I took a deep breath. If I told Finch what I suspected—that the target was me, or even the CIA as a whole—he might think that I’d lost sight of the mission objective. I’d lose my shot at finding out the truth and probably be taken off the team. The chances of me seeing Cat again would drop to zero.

  If I didn’t tell him, though, I’d be going at this alone. And if there was one thing I’d learned in all my years doing this kind of work, it was that being alone was a dangerous way to operate.

  So, I took a deep breath. “I don’t think they want her.”

  Finch frowned.

  “I think they want us. Or, more specifically, me.”

  “What?”

  “I’m the one who shot Mikhail Ivanov,” I said. “Not Zane, not Berkeley—me. The Russians don’t forget that. They’ll replace him with someone just as dangerous, if they haven’t already, and my name will be at the top of their list of priorities. I think they’ve been using the Senator to get to me.”

  Finch frowned. He stared at me for a few moments and then blew the air out of his lungs. “You think?”

  I nodded.

  “What about all this stuff with her grandfather being a player with the Philly Polish mob? What’s that all about?”

  “I think they’re using her to get to me. This Kowalski guy could be an old associate—there could be some bad blood.”

  “This is radical thinking, Anders.”

  “I know.”

  “Berk will blow a gasket if you’re right.”

  “I know.”

  “We could be accused of endangering a US Senator if this gets out.”

  I sighed. “I know.”

  “What do you want me to do?”

  I glanced at him, and a grin tugged at my lips. I extended my hand and he shook it firmly. I nodded, heat seeping into my heart. “First, I want you to get some damn sleep,” I said. “I’ll call Gary and get a plan together to catch these fuckers.”

  Finch nodded. “I think we should wait to tell Berk,” he said slowly. “We should wait until we’re sure.”

  “Agreed.”

  On cue, his mouth stretched into a big yawn. His eyes watered and he shook his head. “Ugh.”

  I chuckled. “You should try one of these hospital beds. Not as bad as they look.”

  “I’ll go home to my king-sized bed, thank you very much.” He nodded once more and disappeared through the door. I took a deep breath and swung my legs over the side of the bed. My side ached where they’d stitched me up, but it wasn’t too bad.

  I’d refused most of the medication they had offered, so my head was clear and I knew what I had to focus on: finding out who was after me, and if Catherine Crawford was in any more danger.

  When I got home, it only took me a few minutes working on my secure CIA laptop to find out that Nathan Blanchet was being held at the D.C. Central Detention Facility while he awaited transfer to the supermax facility in Colorado. I glanced at the time—just after 8am—which meant I had three hours to kill before visitation hours started.

  After a quick shower, I grabbed my keys and phone, and headed out the door. I jumped in my car and gripped the steering wheel tightly, the veins in my neck popping as I wound my way through the D.C. streets.

  When I knocked on Zane’s door, I shifted my weight from foot to foot and glanced through the window. My usual calm demeanor was nowhere to be found. I squeezed my fists into balls and released them before ringing the doorbell again.

  Zane answered, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

  I frowned. “Did I wake you up?”

  “Hello to you too,” he grumbled, opening
the door wider. As a force of habit, he glanced out the door and scanned the street before closing it. He gestured toward the kitchen, where a fresh pot of coffee gurgled on the countertop.

  He sighed heavily before pouring two cups of coffee.

  “I’m guessing by the look on your face that this isn’t a social visit?” He put a mug in front of me and I grinned.

  “I just missed you, Zane, that’s all. Can’t old buddies visit each other just for the hell of it?”

  His eyes snapped up toward me and he snorted. “I know CIA business when I see it.”

  I smiled before sipping my coffee. He stared at me evenly, no trace of sleep in his eyes. I took a deep breath and launched into an explanation of the past months’ events since he’d left the Agency. He didn’t have the security clearance to hear these things anymore, but I’d worked with him long enough to trust him personally. We’d been in the Marines together and decided to join the Special Activities Division of the CIA after that. He was like a brother to me—more than a brother, even.

  Plus, this involved him personally.

  When I finished, I took a deep breath. Zane ran his fingers through his hair and shook his head.

  “You think I’m in danger? Sadie? She might be in danger?”

  “I’m saying that I don’t know what’s going on,” I said. “I’m going to see Blanchet today to try to get to the bottom of it.”

  “He won’t know anything,” Zane said, shaking his head. “The Russians played him for a fool. He won’t have any intel.”

  “I have to ask him anyway. It’s my only lead.”

  Zane grunted.

  “Look, Zane, I know you’re out of the game, but I just wanted to tell you, in case you’d noticed anything recently. Any cars following you or anything like that.”

  Zane sipped his coffee in silence and then looked toward the hallway. He was thinking of Sadie, I could tell. She’d completely changed him from the cold, unfeeling killing machine that I knew to the man he was now… a happy man.

  “How long do you think it’ll take you to sort all this out?” He said, glancing at me.