by Kennedy Fox
“God, I can feel how wet you are through your panties.”
His finger traces along the edge of my underwear before palming my heat, teasing me.
“Please,” I urge, grinding against him. “Touch me, Merric. I need you… I need you to touch me.”
“Fuuuuck!” he groans.
The word sounds like it's being ripped from his chest as he quickly pushes his hand beneath my lace panties. His finger dips into my wet pussy, slowly, before dragging it out, first the tip but giving more with each thrust. His thumb works my clit, each move executed with precision.
Guys my age can’t finger their way out of a wet paper bag. Merric, on the other hand, knows what he’s doing. I hate the thought of all the practice he’s had over the years.
He pulls his hand out from under my pillow, moving to position himself over me. He grips my chin, forcing me to look at him as he kisses me. My mouth opens to him, my tongue searching for his as he licks across my lower lip, biting it enough to leave a sting.
He pushes me onto my back, trailing kisses down my neck and over my chest. His hand finds my breast, brushing his thumb over my nipple, moaning as he does.
“It’s a good thing your mom’s room is on the other side of this house. I can’t get enough of the sounds you make when I touch you.”
My chest heaves. I lift my pelvis up toward him, wanting more of his hands on me.
“I promise I’ll get there. Patience, baby. I’m not rushing this.”
My body practically melts at the sound of his voice calling me baby.
“Take your hair down,” he orders.
I reach my hand up, untwisting the hair tie holding my hair up, watching as he crawls down my body. I sit up, shaking out my long, blonde hair, and pull my shirt over my head. I stare intently as he presses a soft kiss against my stomach before collapsing onto the bed.
“God, you’re so fucking beautiful,” he groans, peering up at me.
He leans back on his haunches, sliding my shorts over my hips, leaving me lying before him with nothing on. Even from where he’s sitting, I’m able to make out the outline of his dick through his pants.
My fingers grip the sheets, anxious to touch him. He bends down, trailing a kiss from my stomach, over my hip toward the apex of my thigh. My back arches off the bed, desperately seeking more of him when he licks a path over to my center. His hand reaches up, spanning across my stomach to hold me down.
I’ve never been so turned on in my life. I don’t even recognize the sounds coming from me.
His fingers move to spread my pussy lips open, blowing out a warm breath over my wet heat. The move sends my nerves into a frenzy just before his tongue flicks over my clit.
He lets out a deep growl, muttering to himself about how good I taste. I slide my fingers through his hair. He turns ravenous, licking and sucking, driving me crazy with need.
“Merric,” I whimper.
“I know, baby.”
He pushes himself up, quickly jumping off the bed, shedding his pants. The move happens so quickly, it causes his dick to spring to attention. I can’t help but lick my lips at the sight of him.
“If you keep that shit up, I’m going to forget all about wanting to fuck you. You have no idea how bad I want to feel your lips around me.”
“I want that, too.”
“Oaklyn,” he commands as I turn, crawling toward him. I trail my tongue over my lips, eager to taste him again. He seems to hesitate for a moment, his hand reaching down to fist his dick.
He stares at my lips before he takes a step toward me. “Open your greedy little mouth.”
Oh, God. Those words will be burned into my memory.
I do as he says, watching as he grips the base of his dick in his hand. I lick the head, swirling it around while he smacks his hard cock against my cheek before letting me taste him again.
This time, he doesn’t hold back, reaching his hand around to tangle his fingers into my hair. He holds my head while he thrusts into my mouth. He doesn’t push too much, testing me, but when he thrusts back in, he moans at the sound of me gagging.
“Fuck, Oaklyn. I can’t…” He trails off, unable to finish the sentence.
“I need to feel your tight heat around me. Right. Now.”
He pulls out, and I giggle as he pushes me back on the bed. He crawls toward me like an animal ready to pounce on its prey.
I want to beg him to slow down, to let me enjoy every inch of his body, but I love turning over the control to him as he takes what he wants. I’m scared if I say anything, it will pull us out of the moment, and I don’t want to lose this with him.
Not again.
He crawls up the bed. This time, he doesn’t stop until he’s above me. The muscles in his arms tense, and his abs clench. I rake my fingers over the ridges of his chest, loving how his body shudders beneath my touch.
I stare down between us, watching as he grinds against me. I wrap my hand around him, pumping him once, twice, before guiding him toward my entrance.
He seems to pause for a moment, staring up at me.
“It’s okay,” I whisper. “I’m on the pill. You have nothing to worry about.”
He tilts his head closer to me, kissing my lips as he slowly enters me. It’s like all the oxygen is stolen from our lungs before he thrusts hard the rest of the way.
Merric collapses on top of me. I wrap my arms and legs around him, holding him against me. He rears his hips back before slamming into me once more.
“My God,” he moans. “You’re so damn tight. I don’t think…”
The words get lodged in his throat. He tilts his head back, squeezing his eyes shut. He brushes the hair away from my face, kissing me slowly this time. My hands grip his back, memorizing the taste of his lips and the feel of his skin against mine.
When Merric changes his position, I slip my hand down between us, rubbing my fingers over my clit, brushing his cock with each thrust. He adjusts his position, draping my leg over his shoulder, hitting right where I want him.
I feel the subtle tingling of my release creeping in, as Merric cries my name.
“Yesss.” I suck in a breath, my body trembling with need.
“Your pussy,” Merric grunts. “Fuck, you’re close. You’re tighter. Baby, I need you to come with me. I want to feel you come around me.”
I’m already close to falling over the edge, but hearing Merric begging me to come with him, I can’t even try to hold back anymore. My body trembles, my release racing through me, as Merric’s hips piston out of rhythm, finding his own.
It was different with Merric than anyone I had ever been with. Now I just hope I can find a way to accept this is all I can ever have with him.
I don’t want this night with him to end.
Chapter Seven
Chills spread over my body as I slowly blink my eyes open. The sun peers in through the window, and I know right away something’s off.
I jolt upright, clenching my comforter to my chest, eyeing my clothes sitting on the floor. We had fallen asleep sometime after four in the morning after enjoying two more rounds of sex; the second one was hard and fast, Merric’s firm hand covering my mouth while mine gripped his back, trying to hold on. The last time was slow and full of passion. I’ll forever remember the look of Merric’s eyes with only the moon casting a soft glow through my bedroom window.
We laid in bed, our legs tangled together, his arms around me, while we talked about what his life is like in Myrtle Beach. He admitted he’s become married to his work, following in his dad’s footsteps. He feels as though he has to prove himself more to everyone after his dad passed, so, many days turn into long nights at the office.
He was thoughtful and attentive, brushing my hair back from my face while I talked to him about college life and working at Whiskey Barrel. I pointed out to him the way his nostrils flared at the mention of me working long nights at a packed bar. I relished the way he got jealous at the thought of men trying to pick me up after a l
ong night of drinking.
His face seemed to soften when I laughed, assuring him that isn’t the case and vowing the only guy I’d been with after closing was the bouncer when he’d walk me to my car.Somewhere between all the talking, subtle touches, and long kisses, we both dozed off. It had been a while since I’d slept so soundly. I never even felt Merric crawl out of bed, nor did he tell me when he went back to his room.
We had a long twenty-four hours, so I try to remind myself he was only doing it to avoid my mom finding him slipping out of my room this morning.
I still can’t shake the feeling that something isn’t right.
I pull on my tank top and slip on my shorts, checking my hair in the mirror. I notice the light bruising on my neck from where Merric kissed and sucked on my skin and decide I should probably pull on a sweatshirt before I search for Merric and something to eat.
The smell of syrup permeates the air, and my stomach growls, wondering what my mom is making this morning. She’s dressed in her Christmas apron, with music once again playing quietly. The lights on the tree sparkle, along with the candles in the entryway and on the dining room table.
I miss being home, and I’m so glad I have the next week to spend here with her.
“There you are! I was wondering when you were going to drag your bum out of bed. For a second, I was expecting to find you and lure you with breakfast.”
I’m grateful I ended up waking on my own, imagining the questions she’d probably have when she found me in bed naked.
She has the waffle iron out on the counter, a mixing bowl with batter sitting next to her, pouring more into the skillet before closing the top.
“Well, it looks like it’s just you and me now.” Her voice drops, a forlorn expression changing her face.
“Why? Where’s Merric?” Dread fills the pit of my stomach, not wanting to know what happened.
“I guess he had some business things he needed to tend to at the office. He wanted me to tell you he was sorry to leave you here, but he took care of arranging for you to have a rental to take back home. It’s already parked outside and everything.”
I circle the island, moving to the other side of the kitchen to peer out the window, seeing a black SUV parked in the driveway. Tears prick my eyes, and I try to blink them away, not knowing how I’d explain why I’m upset over Merric’s sudden departure.
My eyes trail over to the clock on the microwave, reading just after ten in the morning. He probably slipped out of bed just as the sun started to come up.
The fact he thought to arrange for an SUV to drive back tells me he had also thought ahead, wanting me to get back safely, considering how long our trip was here.
“I don’t mind some QT with my mama.” I force a smile I hope looks genuine. I open the cabinet and pull out plates, focusing my energy on helping her with breakfast.
And that’s how the next week goes, too. I tell myself it’s ridiculous to be hurt over how things went with Merric, especially when I know he has been dealing with a lot before coming to Richmond.
A part of me wishes I would’ve pressed him more. Every time I thought about asking him about the kiss we shared three years ago, I’d pull back. I tried to remember the agreement we made and bringing up what it meant to me would muddy the waters.
Considering how he left things after that night, I’m not the least bit surprised he took off. We had discussed how it wouldn’t lead to anything more, and I need to hold up my end of the agreement.
I don’t even have Merric’s number saved in my phone, so I’d have to ask my mom for it if I want to reach out to him. It isn’t something I want to do.
He’s conflicted about me. No matter how badly I want to talk to him, I know whatever is holding him back is something he has to work out on his own. He has to want this, and I deserve someone who isn’t going to push me away at every turn.
The days leading up to Christmas are spent mostly at home. We’re expecting to get more snow, so we spend the Sunday before Christmas in the kitchen baking all day. We have three different types of cookies, chocolate-covered pretzels, and cake balls.
By the time I go back to school, I feel confident I will have gained ten pounds. I’m eating my feelings and tell myself I’d pull my shit together when the new year comes.
One morning, I meet up with a couple of girlfriends from high school for coffee, catching up on life. It’s nice to get out of the house for a little bit and do something with myself. Although, driving the rental Merric got for me only makes it harder for me to get him off my mind.
We spend Christmas Day with our family. My mom, always loving to plan any party, pulls out all the stops to make it a special day for everyone. Aside from my mom, everyone else shows up with someone. I haven’t been in a serious relationship in years. Even knowing it’s all going to come to an end, I still wish I had more time with Merric.
As much as I love spending time catching up with family, I’m ready to head back to Wilmington. I arrange for my roommate, Claudia, to meet me at the rental car service to give me a lift back to our dorm. She works only a few blocks away, so I make sure to arrive in town close to the end of her shift.
Shoving my suitcase on the floor near my footboard, I collapse back against my bed, ready to shower and binge-watch more Supermarket Sweep. I still have the next week off school, so I pick up as many shifts as possible at Whiskey Barrel, wanting to pocket any extra cash I can. New Year’s Eve is going to be a big night, and A Rebels Havoc is supposed to be playing, so I know it will likely bring in a lot of people. Last year, I came home with almost seven hundred dollars in tips, so I have high hopes of another big weekend.
“Why are you acting so… I don’t know… mopey?” Claudia eyes me, her brows furrowing in confusion.
“What do you mean? I’m not acting like anything.” I roll over, huffing as I tuck my pillow under my head.
“Well, you’re certainly not acting like Oaklyn. Normally, you’d bound in here, ready to tell me all about your week in Virginia. You’d drone on and on about your dysfunctional family like a normal person would, but nothing. You’re so quiet… too quiet for you. It’s weird. What’s happening?”
She’s right, honestly. I hardly said two words the entire way home. In fact, that’s probably all I said, considering I thanked her and that was it.
“Spill the beans. Tell me about your trip. I need to hear about how fucked up your family is to feel better about myself.” She falls back on her bed, pushing herself so her back is leaning against the wall, her legs spread out in front of her.
How exactly am I going to break this to her? She wants excitement, so I guess I’ll give it to her.
“Well, I ended up fucking my stepbrother.”
I want to laugh at the way it sounds, even passing my lips, especially when I watch the emotions change from confused, to surprised, to suspicious.
Her face falls, and she rolls her eyes. “Yeah, and I gave Santa a blow job. If you’re trying to make up something you think I wouldn’t believe, you may want to try again with something not so backwoods—” She narrows her eyes at me, pausing. “Are you messing with me?”
I push myself up, resting my head on my hand, staring at her, and subtly shake my head.
She waits for a second, expecting I’m going to laugh or blurt out, “Gotcha!”
“Oaklyn Sanders, are you kidding me? Isn’t this the asshole you told me about before when you had to go back home for your stepdad’s funeral?”
I nod. I never did tell her about the kiss we shared. I think there’s a part of me still trying to convince myself there’s nothing to tell. I pushed it out of my mind and pretended it never happened. After a while, I almost believed it didn’t.
Until I saw him again.
Claudia has been my roommate since my freshman year. We’ve managed to stay in the same dorm together for all four years. We almost got moved around last year until Claudia made up a story about her having some seizure disorder. She was frantic unti
l they agreed to let us continue to stay together.
“You need to spill all the details to me right now. I need to see a picture of him, too.”
I reach into my back pocket, forgetting I had shoved my phone there when I hauled my suitcase up the flight of stairs. I pull up Facebook and search for Merric’s page. He rarely posts on there, but I notice he had been tagged in a few pictures from Penelope’s wedding.
I click on the photo that had made my heart stop when I saw it scrolling through my feed, and I hand her my phone. My stomach twists in knots when I see her mouth fall open, her eyes bouncing between me and looking back down at my phone.
“You’re kidding? He looks like he just stepped out of GQ magazine. Look at his shoulders and those arms, holy shit. I think I just had an orgasm.”
I laugh, reaching to rip my phone out of her hands. “Yeah, tell me about it.”
After she pushes me for twenty minutes, I eventually break down and tell her everything from how he showed up here grumpy, to us arguing the entire drive to Richmond, the night at the cabin, followed by the wedding. I eventually give in and fill in the blanks from the weekend of his dad’s funeral, too, going back to when it all started.
By the time I’m done spilling it all, I feel like the weight on my chest is ten times lighter. I hadn’t realized how much I needed to just talk to someone about everything on my mind.
“We need to get you back out on the dating scene, girlfriend. You know what they say, the best way to get over one dick is to get under another.”
I burst out laughing. I’m not sure that’s the exact saying, but it works.
We end up ordering pizza and scrolling through the new shows hitting Netflix, settling on the new season of Ozark.
The days leading up to New Year’s Eve are uneventful. Whiskey Barrel, despite still being busy during the week, doesn’t have our normal crowd. Campus has been quiet, so I can only assume the changes in the crowds have to do with students not returning home.
When Thursday rolls around, I spend more time getting ready, dressing up in my black and gold Whiskey Barrel t-shirt. I curl my hair, pulling the top half up into a messy bun, leaving the rest down. It’s going to be hot working behind the bar, and I’ll want it out of my face.