"Does this happen a lot?" I hadn't witnessed him having a dream like this before, but who knows what could've triggered it.
"I sleep like shit. Have for a long time, but I'm not sure exactly what the trigger is. The VA gave me sleeping pills, but I won't take them. I'd rather get up and work out than not have my senses about me."
"What's the VA?" I was guessing it was a doctor's office, but I really was unsure.
Ace tilted his head to the side, and even though it was still dark, I could see his features soften. "You know, sometimes you seem like such an old soul, and then other times, there is this innocence about you."
I didn't say anything to that. What could I say? I surely didn't feel innocent.
"The VA is a hospital for people who served in the military. I'm just a dime a dozen there. Every soldier has some type of wound, whether it's mental or physical; if they've been in the thick of it, then they’ve got scars.
"Your MC name?" I questioned. I'd wondered for some time why the name, Bleeding Scars; this conversation made me feel like I got it a little better.
"Yeah, babe. Shane, Gunner, and I; we all got a past. A past that's left its mark but made us who we are. Our MC is about knowing our past and doing what the fuck we want, the way we want, because of it. The thing with scars though they leave a reminder not to make the same mistake twice. You look down at your scar and know you did something to mark you, you're not doing that a second time."
"Wow, that's pretty deep for bikers," I joked, running my free hand up and down his chest, stroking my fingertips along his scar.
Ace grabbed my wrist and pulled me closer to him. "You want deep from a biker, you got to go deep. You might not like everything you find, but it won't matter. You see me and my imperfections, and you know I'm going to do everything I can to learn from my past, and make sure what we're building is solid. I'm going to get deep in you, Princess, in every fuckin' way possible."
He was kissing me. It was deep and hard. His tongue plunged into my mouth. Swirling. Creating desires, feelings, and want.
God, how I wanted him.
I'd never wanted anyone.
But so help me, I wanted him.
I moved for his cock. I wanted to wrap my hands around it and then put it in my mouth. He stopped me, grabbing my wrist.
"You think you're ready?" There was a gruffness to his voice.
"Yes."
"I don't think you are."
He was stopping this again, from going where we both wanted it to go. I wasn't happy about it.
"Stop it. Do not pull away from me again. You're hot and you’re cold, Ace."
He leaned his forehead against mine. I felt his deep inhale and exhale against my lips. "I want you, and I think I've made that perfectly clear, but I don't just want your body. I want it all. I don't think you're ready to give me your all. We've been running so fast at everything. Today was fucked. You met your family for the first time, and let's not forget your fucking dad's visitor. When I sink into you, I don't want to be let up for air. I want to drown in your depths. I want to know that when we're finally together, I got all of you."
Tears threatened to fall from my eyes. What was wrong with me? I'd never let a man affect me like this, so I had an odd sense of rejection. He was right, though, it had only been a day. And bringing up Hades was a reminder I shouldn't need. I had a job to do for my freedom. I needed to stop getting lost in Ace and do it. A small part of me hated myself at that moment.
I began to pull away from Ace, but he stilled my hips close to him and then hitched my leg over his waist. "Let's get a couple more hours of shut-eye. Yeah?"
I didn't say anything. I just stopped resisting and tucked my head in the crook of his arm. I wish I could say that I fell asleep. I didn't. I stayed awake as Ace slept, trying to figure out my racing heart.
Once he was completely asleep, I freed myself of him, grabbed my dreaded bag, and locked myself in the bathroom. I powered on the phone and sent a text.
On his computer was a report of some type of explosion and it said the buildings were empty. I couldn't see more than that. Is that enough?
Guilt coursed through me as I hit send. I felt like the worst type of person. My brother and Ace were opening their entire world up to me, and I was behind the scenes being whored out in an entirely different way.
All my life, all I'd done was play roles. I had to be whomever they wanted me to be. I could do this, couldn't I? I could be who Hades wanted me to be. I could be who Ace wanted me to be. What I couldn't be until this was all over was free. I was no less trapped than when I was a prisoner in Enrico's home.
I WAS POURING MYSELF a cup of coffee. The rich aroma of Arabica beans filled the air. I couldn't make myself go back to sleep. Instead, I decided to get ready for the day. Ace sleepily pulled a shirt over his head as he walked down the hallway.
"Morning," he said, walking behind me and grabbing a coffee mug from the cupboard over my head. He then bent low kissing the side of my neck. I wanted to arch into him, damn traitorous body. "I didn't think you'd be up already."
I didn't say anything, but smiled.
"I need to go in today. It's your choice if you want to come with me, or if you want to just hang out here?"
"I'll come with you," I agreed quickly.
Ace nodded, then poured the coffee into the cup.
"Don't feel like you have too. You might get a little bored, but you can always watch TV." TV did not sound fun to me, but still, I knew I needed to be around everyone.
"I want to go."
He nodded again, and we sat in silence for a while. I liked the silence with him. It was calming-peaceful even.
We rode the bike to the shop. When Ace pulled in, I noticed video cameras on the property that I hadn't seen yesterday.
The garage bay opened, and we rode in. Everyone seemed busy. There was a large machine operating, and I think the operators name was Knuckles. I saw some blue sparks flying, and as I followed Ace, I noticed Shane held some type of wand that had flames coming out of it.
"What's he doing?" I asked Ace. I couldn't help being curious about nearly everything here.
"Shane's welding a piece for a custom."
"Custom?"
"Sorry, custom bike."
"And that?" I asked, pointing to the machine Knuckles was using, "What's that do?"
"It manufactures metal. We have some patents on parts. He's working on an order now for a keg, the valve helps clear the air from a keg line. It’s usually best if used in a kegerator.
"What's a kegerator?"
"Man, you really are cute, do you know that? A kegerator holds draft beer and keeps it cold."
"So that's what you do here? You make machine parts?"
"Yeah, that and bike parts. We do a little bit of everything."
I wanted to ask about the other, not so above-board side of his world, but it didn't feel right. It didn't feel like it was my business, but it was good to know they had legitimate business.
Gunner walked into the main area and approached us. "Hi, Alex. How are you doing today?"
"Gunner," I said his name in nearly a whisper. It was still so shocking to have a brother. "I'm good. Where's Gun?" I had to ask because it always seemed that wherever my brother was, Gun was usually close by.
"He's at school. Yesterday, the teachers had some learning day, or some shit."
"Oh." I didn't know what else to say to that. I wasn't used to small talk.
"Are you going to be around for a while? Would you like to have lunch with me?" He asked.
I looked at Ace, who gave me a subtle nod, indicating he thought I should say yes. "That sounds nice," I answered shyly. Why was I acting shy? It had been such a short time since I'd left Colombia, but I already saw myself changing.
"Ace, you got a minute?" Gunner asked.
Ace nodded and moved down the hallway with Gunner. I strolled around the shop. This place was huge. It was also loud. The machine they were running clanged as
a huge metal box hummed and shook slightly. Small, silver, metal scraps came out of the other end of it.I noticed trash cans filled with metal shavings. Strange.
I walked to the boxing ring that was on one side of the warehouse. There was a pair of faded, red boxing gloves with a few cracks in the leather hanging off the ropes. I wondered if Ace was a boxer. I bet that would be a sight. I had been to fights before. That was a sport the men my uncle associated with had wanted me as arm candy.
I meandered more and passed the loud machine. I saw several motorcycles, and I think Donnie was the large guy's name who was polishing the chrome on one of them. There was a smaller bike that had a purple gas tank. It was pretty, and I wondered if it was for a woman. I wondered if women rode.
A man was kneeling by another bike. He noticed me and stood, then approached. "Alex, right?" He stuck out his hand. "I'm Reggie." I remembered young Gun talking about Reggie, and I recognized him from Ace's house as well, but we hadn't been formally introduced.
"Gun spoke of you. It's nice to meet you." It was odd shaking his hand like we were equals. I'd never really been treated that way.
"This here is Daisy."
I looked around, unsure of who he was talking about.
"The bike. She's a beauty, ain't she? She's a 1970 Dyna Glide. Runs like she was born yesterday, though."
"You named your bike, Daisy?"
"Hell, no. I'm just doing some detailing on this one. Owner's some Sunday rider. Keeps her in the garage until Sundays. Barely takes her around the block then puts her away. It's a shame really. A bike like this should be ridden."
"It's definitely pretty," I agreed.
"It gets a little loud in here. If you're bored, there is a TV and a couch in the first room down the hall. Help yourself to the fridge as well." He pointed to the fridge near the televisions, but with all the noise, I wouldn't be able to hear a damn thing; hence why I was guessing he told me about the room.
"It's nice to have you here. Gunner's been out of his mind with worry ever since he found out about you. And that rescue from Ace was a goddamn miracle, if you ask me."
"Yeah, Ace was pretty spectacular getting me here," I said wistfully.
I moved to one of the coolers near the fridge and grabbed a soda, then walked down the hallway and abruptly stopped when I overheard Ace and Gunner.
"There's going to be a drop in two days," Gunner spoke quietly.
"Off 87?"
"Yeah, you know the spot," Gunner confirmed.
I quickly backtracked and walked into the room Reggie had mentioned. I flicked on the television and sat on the dark suede couch, noticing a small blue stain on the armrest. There was a football and a skateboard against the wall, and my guess was that Gun often spent time here avoiding the noisy clubhouse, and that the blue stain was his doing. As I watched some mundane show about cooking, I felt my eyes grow heavier and heavier.
"ALEX, WAKE UP." SOMEONE was rousing me from sleep, and in my haze, it took me a second to realize it was Gunner.
I blinked, letting my eyes gain focus in the bright room. Gunner was gently shaking my shoulder.
"Hey, I would've let you sleep, but Ace said you barely ate this morning, and it's past one."
"Wow, I can't believe I slept that long." I sat up and momentarily marveled at my brother's eyes. They were soft in a way I'd only seen him look at Charlie and Gunner with. His hazel eyes were so similar to mine; it was almost eerie.
"I can. This couch is the shit. Gun falls asleep on it all the time."
I stood and followed Gunner from the room, and Ace was walking towards us in the hallway. I paused in my steps as he stopped directly in front of us. With incredible gentleness, Ace moved a strand of hair behind my ear. "Have a good lunch, Princess."
I smiled, but didn't say anything. It was intimate in a way that made it seem Ace didn't mind giving that to me no matter who was around to witness it. I followed my brother to a large black truck. It took me a few minutes to figure out how the heck I was supposed to get in it. I must've stood staring at it for too long, because Gunner called from the truck, "Open the door and grab the handle up here." He pointed to a handle on the inside of the door frame.
"Thank you," I said, once I was seated beside him.
"No sweat. Mouse had a hard time getting in here when I first got it."
"Mouse?"
"Sorry, Charlie. Mouse is a nickname I gave her when we were kids."
"Why do you call her Mouse?"
"She was quiet and would never talk, but she was always around. I think she didn't know that I knew she was there. Most people didn’t because - well- because she was as quiet as a mouse."
"Makes sense."
We drove for a few minutes in a different direction than I'd been with Ace. I was able to see a bunch of stores; some even had large neon-colored signs over them. Even though the weather was on the chilly side, there were a lot of people walking.
We pulled into a small diner. I'd never eaten at a place like this, only fancy restaurants with staff that catered to your every whim. There were booths and a few stools in front of a long counter where an older woman poured steaming coffee into a man's coffee mug. There weren't even tablecloths. A few women sat at one booth. I watched as one woman's eyes grew larger as she took in my brother. Another man with a black hooded sweatshirt sat alone, but stood and shook Gunner's hand as we passed. We didn't wait for anyone to seat us. Gunner just led me to an open booth near the corner of the room.
This was all so normal. A brother and a sister having lunch. I wasn't sure what to order and was glad when Gunner offered to order burgers for us both. There were so many things that were different in the States than in my sheltered Colombian life. Sure, I ate well when I was out 'entertaining,' but sometimes expensive food wasn't that great.
It was strange sitting and having a conversation with Gunner. He talked a lot about Gun and his wife, Charlie. I asked how they met, and he explained to me that they were neighbors, but were separated. Charlie raised Gun on her own for a long time before Gunner found them again. He told me how Enrico held Charlie captive, and my gut turned. Enrico was evil. Charlie wasn't the first, but if she was who I thought she was, then she was the last. I remembered her screams.
I cast my eyes downward. "Gunner," I nearly whispered. "I think I remember hearing her. I'd said something to Enrico about it and..." I couldn't tell him what happened to me because of it. Shame and embarrassment moved through my stomach. A sudden wave of guilt coursed through me. Could I have done something more to help her than I had? It didn't feel like it at the time, but I couldn't help but feel sickened and riddled with guilt because of it.
"Excuse me," I said, "I need to use the restroom."
Gunner's concerned eyes watched me. I could tell he was used to reading people. I tried to pretend that his concern didn't affect me. If I acknowledged just how good it felt to be around everyone, I wasn't sure I could deal with what Hades wanted of me. I already felt tremendous guilt because I had been texting Hades. I felt like a fraud. I felt like I needed to choose this side, and freedom be damned. I needed to do more.
I excused myself to the restroom. I needed to pull myself together. I stared at myself in the mirror, a crease formed between my brows. "You can do this, Alejandra," I whispered to myself, trying to give myself a pep talk and to ease the weight on my chest that was beginning to feel enormous. I felt that if I didn't loosen the weight that I'd find myself drowning. But how could I get rid of the shackles that had been holding me down my entire life? It felt like the answer was there, but just out of my grasp.
A slight creak signaled the door to the stall behind me was opening. I wasn't paying attention. I should've been.
An arm snaked out and dragged me into the stall. It happened quickly. A man's large hand clamped over my mouth and pinned me to the wall. I could smell cigarette smoke and musk.
"Boss thinks you're not moving fast enough. Telling him about the report was good. But he ain't happy with how s
low you're working. Said I should remind you of the whore that you are."
His body pressed into mine; his weight trapped me. I felt my old self slipping into place. I raised my chin slightly. I would be who I needed to be in order to survive.
"I'm going to move my hand. If you scream, know that Hades has men on your brother. Do you understand?"
"But of course, Señor," I lowered my voice, the Alejandra I was before, shining through. Had I really changed so much that I now thought of myself as before Ace and after?
His hand cupped my pussy, then squeezed it, pinching the sensitive flesh. I ignored it. I shut off what was happening.
"God, you're a sweet one. I bet I could stick my dick in you, and your cunt would swallow me whole. Would you like that?"
I hated his vile words. I hated him. My father sent him, and I hated him too. This was a reminder; one I wasn't going to forget. I chanced a look at the man. His sideburns were long and stopped abruptly on the side of his face. His eyes were dark, which contrasted with his red hair. He had a scar running through his eyebrow, and his face was full. I cataloged him in my memory. I'd store his face like the rest of them. He was just another man taking.
I was detached.
"I asked if you'd like that?" He spat.
A knock on the bathroom door interrupted him.
"Alex. Is everything okay in there?" Gunner called through the door.
"Answer him yes, and tell him you'll be right there."
"Everything's fine. I'll be right out," I called, hiding the tremble from my voice.
The man pulled away from me, releasing my pussy. I hated the disgusting way my body felt.
"You're going to work harder at getting information for the boss. Or next time, I'll be pinning you to the wall with my dick up your ass. You got it?"
I lifted my chin to him, stepped away like nothing happened, and promptly left the bathroom. Gunner was standing outside of the door, and his face looked murderous. Did he know what just happened? Did he overhear?
He grabbed my arm and pulled me close to him. "Come on. We've got company."
He motioned to the front of the diner, where Hades stood with a small smirk on his face. Of course, he would be nearby.
Explosive (A Bleeding Scars MC) Page 12