by DW Cee
Dinner was a long six-course meal. Nick and I talked about how dissatisfied we were with the meal, and decided to drive around town tomorrow to eat at popular local hangouts. We were tired of hotel food.
Thankfully, dinner lasted long enough to curtail any evening activities. I was secretly jumping for joy. My body hadn’t been this sore since Sarah and I went on a half day hiking trip. After dessert and coffee, I saw Jake whispering in Jane’s ear and she nodded subserviently like a little sister listening to her older, wiser brother. What was my scheming boyfriend up to now?
“You want to go watch a movie tonight?” Jake asked, though it seemed more like a command.
“Um, yeah.” I hesitated, afraid of how I was going to fight him off tonight. “Jane, Nick, you want to come with us?”
Both started laughing and refused my offer. “We are…busy…yeah, busy.”
“What’s going on?” I asked Jake.
“You’ll see,” was all I got for the time being.
We got back to my room, looked through the DVD collection, and found a movie for the evening. My body leaned on Jake’s, half comatose, when I suddenly realized that Jane had not come back to the room. I reached for Jake’s cell phone to call her, but he took it out of my hands and turned it off.
“Where’s Jane?” I asked innocently.
“She’s with Nick. They’re at the movies,” he answered coyly.
“Why didn’t we go with them or why didn’t they come here with us?”
“Sweetheart, they’re trying to give us some privacy.”
As soon as he finished these words, I understood that Jane was not coming back into this room tonight. In fact, I looked around the room and realized that Jane and Jake had switched out their belongings. How had I not noticed this from the moment we walked into the room?
“Why is all your stuff here? And, where are Jane’s belongings?”
“Jane and I switched rooms. She is going to stay with Nick the rest of the trip, and I’m going to stay right here,” he smiled nervously, showing all of his pearly white teeth.
I tried not to look flustered. “Jake! Do I need to have this talk with you again?”
“Come on, Emi. Wasn’t last night wonderful? Let me stay here with you. I promise I won’t do anything naughty.”
“Jake, I’m not comfortable with you spending the night with me again. Last night, I was so tired, I couldn’t fight you off. Tonight, though…it’s not proper for us to be together, especially with your parents right next to us. I’d like to be more respectful than that.”
“Emily.” He turned into his five-year-old self again. I had to be strong and not give into his darling tirade.
“Just one more night, please? I’ll switch back with Jane tomorrow.”
“No. Will you please ask Jane to come back into this room?” I gave him a choice that was really not a choice. He’d have to respect my wishes.
“Oh, all right. I’ll call her right now.” He retracted his arm from my shoulder and moved to the other side of the sofa.
“Thank you. Now where were we?” I inched toward him and laid my head on his lap. He didn’t hold his grudge too long this time.
Jane and I walked to the breakfast table early Wednesday morning to join the rest of the family. Bobby and Sandy were a bit surprised to see that Jake and Nick came as a pair as well.
“Did you meet each other in the elevator?” Sandy asked Jane, referring to our entrance together.
“No, we came together,” she replied and gave her mother an I don’t know what happened look.
Sandy threw a worried and puzzled look over at Jake and he explained, “Emi didn’t want to sleep with me. She chose Jane’s company over mine.”
I politely smiled.
Sandy started talking about the day and I realized that we were not going to be bound by any tight schedules. “Your dad and I have to attend three different college alumni activities, so I’m afraid you are all on your own. We tried to get out of it but since your dad is the president of the association, there wasn’t any way around it.”
I was thrilled not to have any strenuous activities for the day. I could go lay out by the pool or even go back to the room and sleep. The day was looking good.
“What shall we do today, Emily?” Jane asked.
“I don’t know. What do you want to do?” I high-fived myself, I was so happy.
“Let’s go get a facial and a massage. Maybe even a pedicure. Oh, how about a whole day at the spa?” She was so excited.
I was also getting quite excited thinking about unwinding all day before leaving tomorrow night.
“Jane! What am I to do if you take Emi away from me?” Jake’s sour look came back.
“I don’t know. You and Nick find something to do. Go watch another basketball game.” Jane could be stubborn if she wanted to be, and it was a bit comical watching the two argue like five-year-olds.
“No way, Emi’s with me. You find your own friend,” he retorted.
Nick jumped into this argument as well. “I thought we were going to go find local food?” he said, turning to me.
“OK. I have a solution. How about if Jane and I do a half day at the spa while you boys go watch the morning matches? We’ll meet you for lunch around 1:00 and then we can go into town and find yummy food.” I turned to Jake and sweetly requested, “My body hurts badly from all the exercise. I need a massage to unwind me. Would you be OK with that?” I added a few kisses in between the request so he would cave without a fight.
“Sounds good to me,” Nick and Jane both said at the same time. Jake was the only one pouting because he didn’t get his way. We parted for the morning, and Jane and I spent a glorious morning pampering ourselves. This was the Hawaii I had imagined before arriving.
We started with a deep tissue massage, continued with a facial, and then got a manicure and a pedicure.
For lunch, we asked the hotel concierge to point out all the local hot spots. We had small meals at several local joints. My favorite was a little shack that specialized in katsu. We ordered chicken, pork, beef, and fish-fried cutlets. I couldn’t possibly leave Hawaii without having eaten something lathered in mayo, so I chose the macaroni salad with the deep fried goodies. Honestly, I felt sick from all the grease.
After the third meal, Jake and Jane begged us not to eat any more. Nick and I acquiesced, but only after visiting Maui’s most famous ice cream shop where we treated ourselves to strawberry and pineapple ice cream. Today was an ideal day in Hawaii.
Nick and Jane went surfing to work off our lunches, but Jake and I went back into our cabana. After a massage and thousands of calories, I needed a nap. Jake behaved himself after my speech last night, and brought a book to read while I napped on the lounge chair. His hands ran up and down my arm wanting to explore elsewhere, but for the rest of the day, he was harmless.
Thursday was our last day in Hawaii. Nick and I had so much fun yesterday; we tried to convince everyone to go into town in search of yummy food again. Bobby, Sandy, and Jane decided to go off on their own, and then meet us at the airport. Jake had no choice but to go eat some more if he wanted to be with me. Nick and I were only too happy to go find more treasures. We made one more pit stop at the ice cream shop before heading to the airport.
On our red-eye flight back home I pondered over how much this trip meant to me. Fully laid back, Jake held my hand while he snored away. The correct thing to do would be to join him and the rest of the family but I just couldn’t sleep.
“Emily.” Surprised, I quickly turned my head to Jane’s calling.
“I’m sorry. Am I keeping you awake with my reading light?”
“No. I thought I heard a sigh. Is something the matter?”
“Oh, Jane.” I answered with a mixture of dreaminess and dread. “How can anything be wrong? The last four days were heaven.”
“Then why do you sound like somebody who’s headed for ruins?”
I giggled at her comment. Jane giggled back.
With a heavy heart, my voice whispered, “I’m afraid to like your brother as much as I do.” Gently, I placed my free hand on his face and moved the overgrown bangs out of his eyes. His body moved closer toward my seat as he pulled my hand into both his hands, and placed it on his heart.
“He loves you—a lot!” Jane looked happy for us.
“I love him too—a lot!” I sighed again.
“Then why the sigh? I don’t get it.”
“He’s too perfect. You’re too perfect. In fact, your whole family is like a dream. And you know…my life has been anything but a dream. In fact, it’s been closer to a nightmare. I feel like I’m going to wake up from this dream and go back to my reality—a reality where you and Jake and your family are no longer there.”
“Emily.” Even a frown couldn’t mar her pretty face. “A little melodramatic. I don’t see Jake going anywhere, anytime soon. In fact, I’d bet my law degree that you two will be married within a year. No one in my family has seen Jake this in love. You and I are going to be sisters like we promised. I will not accept anything less, you hear me?”
“Emi?” Sleepy-eyed, Jake woke up with a worried gaze. “What’s wrong, Sweetheart?”
“Nothing.” I put on a smile. “Jane and I were just having a heart to heart.”
“Jane. Stop gabbing and let Emi sleep.” Always protective of my well-being, I kissed his head to show him my appreciation.
Like a proper sister, Jane rolled her eyes and ignored him.
“You sure you’re OK?” he whispered while kissing the hand he was holding.
Nodding yes, I turned the light off and reclined. Part of me wanted to cry from being deliriously happy with this man, and another part of me wanted to cry because I couldn’t shake off these unsettled nerves that foreshadowed doom and gloom. Inwardly sighing so no one would hear, I pushed away the dread and welcomed sleep.
Chapter 7 Jake’s Proposal
We landed at LAX early Christmas morning, and I said my good-byes to everybody before heading home. Jake’s mom and dad hugged and kissed me and made me promise to come over early for Christmas dinner. I nodded and got in the car with Jake.
“I had such a wonderful time with your family, Jake. Thank you! Though I just met them, I cherish them like my own.” My lips spanned from one ear to the other. “Your mom and dad did an amazing job raising you three. I see why you turned out to be such a caring person. I’m glad I came on this trip. I feel much closer to you and your family,” I gushed.
Jake all of a sudden parked his car on the side of the road and pulled out another jewelry box from his suitcase, just like the one I got in San Francisco—the kind a girl received when a man got down on one knee, about to propose to the woman he loved.
“Merry Christmas, Sweetheart.”
“Jake. I left your present at home. Let’s exchange gifts when we get back to my house.”
“No, I want you to open this now. I have something else for you when you come over tonight to Mom’s.”
“Jake, you’re really spoiling me. Hawaii was enough of a present. You didn’t have to get me anything else. By the way, wasn’t this my Christmas present?” I asked holding the ring from my neck.
“That was, but when I saw this in Hawaii, I knew I had to get it for you. Please open it.”
I slowly began to unwrap the silver bow. I could feel my body tensing up, hoping for and against another ring. As much as I adored this man, thinking beyond our current relationship wasn’t a smart choice for me.
When I opened the box, he didn’t disappoint my hope and fears. Inside the box was a huge solitaire diamond engagement ring. I looked at him, shocked and dazed.
“Emi, don’t be scared. I bought this thinking I could hold off till you were ready, but after this trip I realize I don’t want to be without you. Emily Anne Logan, I know it’s only been a short two months, but I want to be with you forever. I love you more than any man could love a woman, and I promise to love you this way the rest of my life. Will you marry me?” His most sincere blue eyes looked almost in pain awaiting my response.
I hesitated for a while—a long while. I tried not to think about this intimidating situation. I thought about useless facts like how I was sitting in the passenger seat of a car and how this was not what I’d imagined a proposal to be. My heart fluttered, wildly excited about this proposal, but my mind panicked. Was I ready for this? Would the prospect of marriage to one another be as wonderful to him in a few months as it would be to me? Two months—the entirety of our relationship, of us knowing one another—couldn’t be long enough for him to love me that deeply, already. Infatuation would be a better terminology for what he felt for me. But, what would he do if I said no?
Copious thoughts raced through my head.
Before I finished my thoughts, Jake shook my arm. “Emi? Are you OK? I’m sorry. I know I turned too serious too soon for you. But, I love you and want to be with you every day and every night for the rest of my life. Let’s get married! Huh?” He leaned over and lightly brushed his lips against mine. I didn’t respond, but I also didn’t push him away.
“Jake…oh, Jake,” I sighed. Jake kissed me again. This time a bit rougher than before, and I gave in to his physical desire and demand. My mind was still trying to sort out my heart.
“You know how much I like you.” My head automatically shook ‘no’ as Jake pulled away. “After meeting your family and spending time with all of you in Hawaii, I know your family is just about as perfect as a family can be. But, I’m not ready for a lifelong commitment. It’s too soon. You can’t mean this already. I am committed to you as a girlfriend and that’s where I’d like to stay for a while. I hope this is OK. I’m sorry but my answer is no.”
Could you possibly love me this much already? Enough to want to live with me forever? I want to marry you, love you forever, start a family with you. But, I couldn’t stand it if you regretted your decision later on.
He stared at me, and didn’t respond at first.
“I’m sorry…are you hurt by my response?” I tried to solicit an answer. “I’m sorry.” I repeated myself just in case he didn’t hear me the first few times.
Jake didn’t look my way. He got back on the road and started driving.
“Jake, we just started dating. Why do we need to move so fast? Can’t we just enjoy ourselves?”
“Emily, why can’t you even consider this proposal? Why do you need to reject it so quickly? I’ve known since the first day we met at the grocery store I wanted to marry you. Can’t you see how much I love you?” Jake became visibly upset. “Why are you so scared all the time?”
“Jake, it’s been two months. How do you know already?” Cautiously, I asked, hoping to discuss rather than to argue. “How do you know a few months down the road you will still desire forever with me? Maybe we were both caught up in the bliss of Hawaii.”
“The bliss of Hawaii..? Why do you always doubt my love for you? Is it because of Max? Just because he callously dumped you rather than marry you doesn’t mean I’m going to do the same thing to you. Don’t compare us!”
Just because he callously dumped you…my heart broke at Jake’s callous word.
Before I could recover, Jake’s tone elevated to an even angrier pitch. “Are you still not over Max? Is this what your rejection is all about? Would you have said no to him if he’d asked you to marry him?”
“Why are you bringing Max into this?” I yelled back. My anger rose above my pain. I regretted my tone, but couldn’t understand why he would bring Max into this conversation. It was unfair of him to ask me about a proposal from Max that never transpired. I didn’t know what hurt more right now—the fact that my ex-boyfriend of four years dumped me the night I expected a proposal, or that my current boyfriend so cruelly reminded me that he dumped me before I had any chance at a proposal.
“Forget it, Emily. Forget I just proposed. Let’s just forget everything.”
My heartbreak multiplied exponentially. Of c
ourse this was too good to be true. Jake, what does it mean to forget everything? Does everything include us?
Swallowing all of my tears, I took a last glance at Jake then stared out the window.
Jake looked angry and aloof. I knew this—Jake, Jane, the Reid family—was temporary. Happiness appeared to be so commonplace in most people’s lives—parents, siblings, extended family, love—where was all this for me? I probably just pushed away the best thing that had happened to me since my parents. Why did he have to move so fast? Couldn’t he tell that I’d be too scared to commit so haphazardly? If he loved me so much, couldn’t he let me answer him in my own time? Although I was scared beyond belief right now, I knew if given a little time, my fear would subside, and I’d admit that we would be together for a lifetime.
My pain aside, I feared what was on Jake’s mind at this moment. I knew he believed I didn’t care for him the same way he cared for me. Never once did I explain to him how much he meant to me, just how much I loved him. Every time he professed his love for me, I’d never fully reciprocated. He probably believed I didn’t feel as strongly for him as he did for me. How ironic Jake might feel this way when I loathed feeling this way with Max. I hadn’t been fair to the man I loved.
“Jake? Please say something. I’m sorry for turning you down. Can’t you give me more time? I’m not ready to get married.” I kept swallowing back my sniffles.
Silence.
He didn’t seem to care.
Jake drove the entire forty minutes without saying a word or breaking his visage. I kept looking at him, wanting to say something to ease this tension, but I decided to leave him to his silence. Sadness surrounded every corner of my being. I had lost another person who felt like family. My face stayed focused on the window to hide my fears. It’s over, already.
Could there be a second chance for us?
The welcomed sight of my driveway brought with it the inescapable tears.
“Do you want to come in and talk?” My eyes blinked rapidly to hold onto the tears.