by Paul Bellow
Bernard turned away.
“I didn’t know people were trapped in here,” I said. “You have to believe me. All I want to do is get out of this stupid game.”
Bernard snorted.
“It’s the stupidest cool game I’ve ever played,” he said.
“With a quit option, it would be the best. To be honest, I thought my hack into the game might’ve been the reason we were stuck. I was so happy to learn others were trapped in here too.”
“That’s messed up,” Bernard said. “Us human players need to stick together.”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“Like you said, the AI for the game is buggy. The game’s constantly evolving.” He turned and put a hand on my shoulder. “I think we have a shot of getting out of here, especially if you are who you say you are in the real world.”
“I’m just me,” I said. “But I’m known for hacking virtual worlds.”
“Games in the real world were never my thing,” Bernard said, pulling his hand away and turning away from me. “I suffered from depression, so I spent a lot of time reading and writing.”
We both stayed silent a moment.
His head bobbed back and forth as if he was considering something.
“I’ve seen so much in here during the last twenty or more years,” he said. “Some days it feels like even longer. All these memories and quests…Things get confusing quickly.”
He stood and paced back and forth in the cramped cell, gesticulating with his arms as he continued talking.
“Some days I feel fine,” he said. “But then I realize I’m stuck in this game and won’t ever get out.”
He stopped and turned.
“Do you know what I mean?” he asked.
I nodded, not imagining what twenty or more years in the game would do to me. Sarah would hate me and stop talking to me if that happened to us.
“The game can do permanent damage to a person,” Bernard said. “I wanted to say something about Monde before, but I didn’t. She was in my original group that got sent into the game. My depression was nothing compared to the fantasy world she lived in back in reality.”
“Great,” I said, shaking my head. “You should’ve told us before.”
“I know.” Bernard took a deep breath. “I’ve been in this game so long, man. You don’t even know what it’s like…”
“You’re right,” I said. “And I shouldn’t be blaming you. If there’s a way out of this game, I’m the perfect person to find it.”
He sat on the floor with his back to the wall, staring outside the cell with a blank expression on his face. My thoughts went to Sarah.
Was she okay? Did we still have a chance of defeating the quest, clearing level one-one, and finding a way out of the stupid game?
I leaned back and closed my eyes. Sleep overtook me as I sorted through all the crazy thoughts in my mind.
Being a prisoner sucked.
I felt someone touching my arm.
“Are you up?” Bernard asked.
I opened my eyes. Had I dozed off?
“Yeah,” I said, sitting up. “Everything okay?”
“Not really,” he said, his head bobbing back and forth. “I need to talk to you.”
“Something else?” I asked as I stood and stretched. “You can tell me.”
“I don’t know,” he said. “I’m not sure.”
“You can tell me,” I said. “We’re bonding in this goblin cell.”
I smiled, hoping to calm him down.
He stepped toward me.
“I figured out a way to get us out of this mess,” he said.
“That’s great.” I smiled. “What’s the plan?”
He kept his lips pursed together, his brow furrowed.
“Spit it out,” I said. “Has to be better than my non-existent plan.”
“One of us needs to sacrifice themselves for the other,” he said. “I’ve given it a lot of thought, and that’s the only way out.”
“Any plan that doesn’t involve both of us getting out of here isn’t a plan,” I said. “Period. End of discussion.”
He shook his head, still not smiling.
“This is the only way. We’re too close to clearing level one-one. After you get out, you can go find Sarah, get the Dawn Acid, and finish the quest. You two deserve to keep going.”
“Don’t talk crazy,” I said. “Besides, your plan wouldn’t even work. The goblins are dumb, but not that dumb.”
“What else can we do?” Bernard asked.
“I don’t know yet. Let me think of something.”
A commotion outside the cage caught my attention.
“You’re not eating them!” a goblin yelled.
I turned to Bernard and frowned.
“What did he say?” he asked.
I shook my head and said, “It’s not good.”
“You better come up with something quick,” he said.
“We’ll fight them barehanded if we need to. No way they’re eating us.”
We both moved to face the door of our cell.
As I waited in my underwear and flimsy white shirt, the voices got louder. Bernard nudged me, and the voices got closer.
19
Are You Two Following Us?
Sarah
* * *
Instead of charming all eight goblins, I went for their alpha male.
He fell prey to my spell easily enough. Disguising myself as a female goblin had probably helped, because their leader kept staring at my chest.
“My eyes are up here, worthless human-lover,” I said in goblin-tongue. “You want to give me your prisoners.”
“We should give her the prisoners, boys,” the goblin said.
“No way,” a pudgy goblin said from the back of the group.
“Get up here,” their leader said. “I’ll teach you a lesson.”
“Take me to your prisoners,” I said. “My troops are hungry.”
“We’ve got orders to keep them here for Magi Inyontoo, but…”
He nervously glanced to the left and right.
“If he’s not here, he can’t outrank me. Take me to your prisoners.”
“You’re losing him, Kali. Be careful,” Charlotte said.
“I’ll take you to the prisoners,” the leader said. “The rest of you wait here for us to get back. If anyone comes out, kill them.”
The other goblins grunted and nodded their heads.
“After you,” the charmed goblin said.
I walked into the cave, knowing he was checking me out. With a bit of luck, I could help Bernard and Eric escape.
“You’re a fine-looking specimen,” the nasty goblin said.
I wasn’t afraid to wiggle my behind to keep his attention.
“They’ll make a good meal for my men as we march to the human lands,” I said over my shoulder.
“You’re not eating my prisoners!” the goblin yelled.
Was my spell wearing off?
I kept walking, not letting the green-skinned goon see me sweat.
After a few turns, we reached a room dug out of the stone. Half of it was protected by iron bars. I saw Bernard and Eric trapped.
“They look fat enough to eat,” I said then pointed to Bernard. “Especially that one. He’ll feed two dozen goblins at least. Let them out.”
Bernard looked over at Eric. I hoped he didn’t translate for him.
“Something isn’t right,” the goblin leader said. “You were going to give me something, weren’t you?”
“Where’s their belongings? You will give me those too,” I said. “They will be used for tribute to Magi Inyontoo.”
At the mention of the mage’s name, the goblin began shaking.
“We sent their equipment east already,” he said. “I’m helping, okay? Don’t tell him otherwise. The stories…”
I kept up my entitled aristocrat act.
“Then do as you’re told,” I said.
I turned as the goblin in
charge shuffled forward. Bernard and Eric stepped back as if unsure it was really me in disguise.
“Now drop your sword,” I said, perhaps pushing it.
“Come on,” the goblin said. “You can’t take my sword.”
“Time for your reward.” I grabbed the goblin’s arm and pulled him away from the door of the cell. “Over here.”
I slowly lowered my face, lips puckered—wishing the others would hurry up and escape already. Eric grabbed the goblin’s neck.
The reality of the game hit me as he choked the poor mob who was only doing he’s job. Eric kept squeezing until the goblin fell lifeless to the floor.
“Are there others?” he asked.
“Outside,” I said, nodding, still overwhelmed by the primal savageness of the kill. “Seven more if I counted right. This battle isn’t over.”
I hadn’t seen a game notification for experience points.
Eric leaned down and took the goblin’s sword.
“Does he have any other weapons?” Bernard asked.
“None,” Eric said.
“We should get going,” I said.
Eric straightened, swinging the sword.
It almost looked like a large dagger in his hand. Was it enough?
“Can you take all of them?” I asked. “Maybe I should disguise you. We might get lucky and talk our way out of it.”
“Good idea,” Bernard said. “Do you have the…energy?”
I nodded then cast Become Unknowable Humanoid on them.
You cast Become Unknowable Humanoid x2.
You have [39/104] mana remaining
“You should’ve made me look like their leader,” Eric said.
“I can’t control it that much yet,” I replied. “Give me a break. I did just save you two. You’re both hobgoblins.”
Bernard glanced down at the undershirt barely covering his belly. Eric cleared his throat and glanced around.
“Dibs on the goblin armor,” he said.
“Aw, man…” Bernard moaned.
“We need a story for the other goblins outside the cave,” I said. “Either of you two have any ideas?”
Bernard shook his head.
Eric dropped the armor. “No way either of us is fitting in that.”
“At least you have a sword,” I said.
“If you can call it that,” Eric said as he held out the goblin blade.
“They sent your stuff east,” I said. “Maybe we can catch up with them.”
Eric, barely naked, walked toward the tunnel.
“Let’s go,” he said. “Time’s ticking.”
“Hey,” Bernard said. “Do you still have your Dawn Acid?”
I nodded and said, “Good thing we split it up.”
The priest-turned-rogue smiled. We walked to catch up with Eric.
Did he even have a plan? Could we kill seven more goblins?
I jogged to catch up with Eric, putting my hand on his shoulder.
“Hold on,” I said. “We need a plan.”
“Kill the goblins,” he said. “Simple enough.”
“You’re going to kill them all on your own with no armor and that dinky sword?” I asked. “Good luck with that one.”
“I’ll be fine,” he said. “You can help if you want.”
“Maybe we can talk our way out of it,” I said. “They saw their leader accepting everything I told him.”
“And we’ve only got the one sword,” Bernard said.
Eric took a deep breath.
“Okay,” he said. “But if it doesn’t work, we’re going with plan E.”
I tilted my head.
“Plan Eric,” he said.
Bernard chuckled, relieving a bit of the tension.
“You look like hobgoblins now,” I said. “How am I going to explain that to them? Maybe your idea is the best.”
“I’m tired of thinking,” Eric said. “Time for action.”
He took off down the tunnel.
Bernard and I followed a few steps behind.
Losing most of our equipment would set us back.
Eric reached the mouth of the cave and stopped. He looked ridiculous in his undies, but I stifled my mirth.
“Your leader is indisposed,” I said. “We need you all to drop your weapons and take off your armor.”
“Are you nuts?” a goblin a few feet away asked.
“Your leader told me—”
“I’m the leader of this group,” a well-weathered goblin interrupted. “Who are you three?”
Eric turned to me, and I shrugged.
Had I charmed the wrong goblin?
I counted their heads and saw eight of them.
“You’re waking me up from my nap,” the older goblin said. “This better be important or beneficial to me.”
“Screw this,” Eric said.
He ran forward, swinging the small goblin sword. Two green foes fell to the ground lifelessly as he kept moving.
Bernard stepped forward to one of the bodies and grabbed a sword.
I waited before casting to see if they could handle it on their own.
The more mana I saved the better off we would be—unless, I needed to save the party again. Bernard and Eric kept attacking goblins.
I saw their actual leader running down the hill, trying to get away. Before he could get too far, I cast six Golden Bolts at him.
Your Golden Bolts INJURE the goblin captain for 22 damage.
The goblin captain is dead!
You have [27/104] mana remaining
I turned to check on the other two. Goblin bodies littered the ground. Eric yelled, jumped in the air—then struck the last one.
Combat is Over!
You get +450 xp divided by three party members.
You get 150 xp.
You have 24,024 xp
You need 10,976 xp for level six Wizard->Warlock
“Thanks for busting us out of there,” Bernard said.
“Yeah,” Eric added. “We were getting worried.”
“No problem,” I said. “Maybe we should hang tight for a night. I’m low on mana and could use the rest.”
Eric nodded.
“That makes sense,” he said. “Maybe Bernard and I can craft some armor out of all these pieces.”
“Do you hear something?” Charlotte asked.
I put a finger to my lips.
“Quiet,” I whispered. “Charlotte hears something.”
As Eric tilted his head to listen, his eyes widened.
“Someone’s coming,” he said. “I hear at least two voices, and they’re both getting closer.”
“We should hide,” I said. “Until we know what we’re up against.”
Eric nodded then lifted his goblin short-sword. The voices got louder as they approached.
“We’re not lost, bozo,” a familiar voice shouted.
Ewen? Had the brownies found us?
Confident in my elven ears, I stepped out from the bush. The two brownies stopped and pulled daggers.
“Whoa, hold on,” I said, raising my hands. “Don’t you remember me?”
“I don’t know any goblins,” Evan said.
“Oh, we’re disguised,” I said. “Remember before?”
“Kill the goblins,” Evan yelled, running forward. “They’re all evil.”
“It’s me, Kali,” I said.
Both brownies stopped. Their ever-present smiles creeped me out.
“Kali?” Evan asked. “Is that you? Where did we meet?”
“In Shockly Forest,” I said. “We went to Fishguard together.”
Evan lowered his knife while Ewen kept his up.
“It’s me,” I said. “Promise. What are you two doing in the Forbidden Kingdom? Have you been following us?”
“The one with the big belly looks familiar,” Ewan said.
He pointed at Bernard.
Evan ran forward and threw his arms around me.
“I missed you so much,” he said. “They kicked us out of Ester
hollow until we kill enough goblins to gain citizenship.”
“What?” I turned to Eric as he walked up. “That’s crazy.”
“Sounds like the Tower of Gates,” he said. “Hey, guys.”
“You know about the game?” Ewen asked.
Eric and I looked at each other then turned back to the brownies.
“Can we join your group already?” Evan asked.
“We could use their help, Eric,” I said.
“It’s fine with me,” he said. “We need all the help we can get.”
“Fine with me too,” Bernard added.
We officially invited the brownies into our party.
Evan the Brownie Rogue Joins Your Party.
Ewen the Brownie Fighter Joins Your Party.
I shook my head and said, “Not another rogue.”
Both brownies kept smiling.
“How are you two brownies and player characters?” Eric asked. “I don’t remember that option when we started.”
“We had a choice,” Evan said.
“Not sure how,” Ewen added.
“How did you two get in the game?” I asked.
Evan glanced at Ewen momentarily.
“Tell them,” Ewen said. “Might as well.”
“We were prisoners in Nashville, Tennessee,” Evan said. “We signed up for a beta test program to get out early. The game was so hard, and we were having fun as Brownies, so we settled into it. Until you came along, Sarah. You reminded us of the real world.”
The brownie’s creepy smile continued.
“How long have you two been in the game?” I asked.
“Eighty-three years and change,” Evan said.
My mouth hung open in utter shock.
“Are you sure?” I asked.
“Yeah,” Ewen said grimly. “How long have you guys been in?”
“Over a month now,” I said. “Time is so weird in here.”
“So,” Eric recapped. “We’ve got developers stuck in here, two people from a prison, and others from a mental health facility.”
“None of it makes sense,” I said. “And who was in a mental health facility?”