by Zandria West
‘I didn’t have the chance to say it before, but I’m so glad you’re safe Lana,’ he murmurs. ‘I don’t know what I would do if I lost you.’ He catches hold of my hand and presses his lips against it in a gesture that feels both strangely formal and intensely intimate. Then, after one more long gaze, he turns and is gone down the path at a speed I’d have no hope of matching, even if my foot wasn’t shooting daggers of pain. I hobble awkwardly for the first little distance, then am relieved to feel my foot seem to grow rapidly numb. I find myself able to walk normally again.
‘I miss Ruark,’ Gabriel sighs behind me. ‘If he’d been with us, he’d have flown ahead and scouted the track, and we could have seen where the convoy was and whether we would make it in time to stop them or not.’
I swallow. I know it’s not really my fault, but I feel some measure of responsibility for the death of Gabriel’s familiar. I touch my arm where the mark of his crow still waits. I only knew Ruark for a little while, but I’ll never forget his beauty. A sense of power emanated from him that I know was deeply linked with Gabriel’s own power. And I suddenly realise that although I’ve had a difficult time, Gabriel has too, and I haven’t even thought about it. He lost his crow, who so far as I can tell was his closest friend and most powerful ally. He raised his mother from the dead, heard her terrible message, then watched her turn to dust. That’s got to do something to a person. Maybe the hard veneer I see so often now, the sense of cold, proud, anger, is covering something more difficult for him to admit: grief.
I slow a little until I’m walking beside him.
‘Can you ever take another familiar? How does it work?’ I ask.
Gabriel pauses for a moment and I wonder if the question itself might be offensive. I know so little that sometimes I don’t even know what I should and shouldn’t ask.
Finally, he sighs. ‘It’s a special connection between a warlock and his familiar. Some never find it. Most only have one in their lifetime. A very small number have been known to have more than one, but I do not expect that to be the case for me. I just have to accept that he’s gone.’
‘Do you? You couldn’t, like, try it and see? There must be lots of animals around in the forest here, maybe one of them…’
Gabriel waves a hand as though to brush the idea away. ‘It’s not like speed-dating. You do not just try one and then another and another. It is a sacred bond, deep and profound, and it only occurs with the blessing of the Goddess herself. It is a boon, to have a familiar. And the dark-side of such a boon is the likelihood of its loss. I must accept it, that is all, and learn to live with my reduced powers.’
I realise that I’ve been so focused on the conversation with Gabriel that I haven’t even noticed my foot at all for a little while.
‘The bandaids have worked a treat,’ I call to Alex. He’s walking ahead of us, but I have no doubt he is listening to our every word – and some of the things I’m not saying, too.
‘I may have provided them some assistance…’ Gabriel says.
‘You used magic? To heal my feet? But shouldn’t you save it for more important things? Won’t you run out?’
Gabriel frowns. ‘I won’t run out as you put it. And at this point in time, your feet are important. This journey is important. And this is only the start. The trek to reach your mother will take far longer and will be through much rougher terrain. If you can’t last a day’s hike over the mountain in fair weather, then we’re in for a very unpleasant few weeks.’
I swallow. ‘Right. Ah, thanks then.’
I keep putting off thinking about anything beyond today. I can’t bear the darkness of my thoughts and fears when I think of what might be coming. For a moment, I wonder whether perhaps the reason that I leapt to help Reuben save Briony wasn’t as altruistic as I imagined it to be? Maybe I was just avoiding the things I’m not ready for yet. Like the bloody long trek. And meeting my mother for the first time in twenty years. And being the key, and whatever comes after that…
A cold dread prickles my skin as I think of what Gabriel told me. It’s all so much bigger than me and completely outside of my control.
Right now, all I control is this: putting one foot in front of the other.
18
LANA
We make better time as the day continues. You’d think we’d be exhausted. The climb doesn’t grow any easier, but it’s like we find a rhythm and it propels us up the slope. By the mid-afternoon we’ve made it to the summit. We have literally, officially, climbed the mountain. Okay, so I do a little victory dance then collapse for a while once we get there.
We rest for a little while. I finish my water. Reuben assures me there will be a stream not far down as we begin the descent. The downwards path should be quicker too. Gabriel climbs onto the top of a boulder and looks out at the surrounding forest, his gaze focused and intense.
‘He’s using the Farsight,’ Alex whispers to me, as though careful not to distract him. ‘It’s one of the powers he gained from his connection with Ruark. From here he’ll be able to see down to the road and if we’re lucky he’ll spot the convoy.’
I watch him as he stands there. The wind has picked up a little and his dark hair is blowing wild around his shoulders, his cloak swishing with the breeze like a sail. He’s all black: black clothing, black hair, eyes dark as coal… He’s beautiful and kind of scary. Then he turns and looks at me and for an instant it’s like something in me is alight – I feel as though I’m burning up with the energy. And then he looks away.
Vera and Andreas are crouched to one corner of the clearing, heads close in intense conversation.
Reuben leaves them and approaches me. ‘We’re not far off now Lana. Whatever happens, let Alex and Gabriel look after you. They’ll keep you safe.’
I swallow. ‘It’s going to be fine,’ I say, my stomach lurching with anxiety. ‘We’ll get Briony back and it will all be fine.’
Reuben holds me in his gaze for a long moment, as though trying to memorise me. Then he leans in and kisses me once, gently, on the forehead.
‘I can just make the convoy out,’ Gabriel calls. ‘I’d guess they’ll be at the river crossing in an hour or so.’
Shit. An hour. An hour to get down a mountain that has taken us at least three to get up.
‘In that case, we run,’ Reuben growls, giving me one last look before leaping to the head of the path and vanishing away down the slope. Vera and Andreas rise and follow him quickly. Alex and I trail behind them, Gabriel taking up his accustomed position at the rear of the group.
Going down is meant to be easier, right?
My legs feel like jelly, and my knees are starting to hurt, and every step I take I feel sure I’m about to trip and plummet down half a mountainside head first.
Going down is not easier. It may be quicker, but it’s not easier.
‘Just keep your focus,’ Alex says.
Right. Excellent advice. That will make my muscles stronger and stop me from accidentally putting my weight on a loose rock and realising my mistake when I end up on my ass. Thanks.
‘And lower the sarcasm levels,’ Alex adds, frowning at me.
‘Sorry,’ I mutter. He’s not meant to be able to hear it. I’m used to being able to run a sarcastic commentary in my head whenever I want without anybody being the wiser.
After ten minutes, we reach a small creek and I stop briefly to fill up my water bottle. The water is beautifully clear and flows quickly over pretty pebbles. I see tiny fish darting in the shallows and a dragonfly humming overhead.
Dad would like it here, I find myself thinking. He’d like the peacefulness of it.
‘Can we come back one day?’ I turn to Gabriel and Alex. ‘Sometime when the world’s not about to end and nobody is in danger of dying? It’s nice here.’
‘I would like that very much Lana,’ Gabriel says, giving me an intense gaze that makes me shiver. We both know there’s every chance that day might never come, at least not for me.
�
�Alright, better get going again,’ I say hurriedly. I don’t want Alex prying into my mind, and I figure the best way to avoid it is to keep moving.
We begin to scramble down the slope again.
I feel like I’m getting the rhythm of it. My legs are slightly numb but mostly doing what I want them to. I’ve got into a pattern of hop jog hop jog, because the rocks are wedged together in such a way that they almost form a series of regular steps.
‘Are these actually steps?’ I ask.
‘They are. They were placed there by an ancient people in a time before memory,’ Gabriel replies.
I’m about to say ask him more about the history of the forest when something snags on my right foot and I fall heavily.
‘Shit!’
There’s a tearing feeling and a sudden sharp pain. In an instant Alex is beside me, his arms around my shoulders, helping me to stand.
‘Can your foot take your weight?’ he asks.
‘It’s okay,’ I say, tentatively letting my weight shift from one foot to the other. But it’s not okay. Not even slightly. The pain is so intense it brings tears to my eyes.
Fucking great. A sprained ankle at the start of a week-long jungle trek is just fucking fantastic.
‘Can you heal it?’ Alex turns to Gabriel, frowning. ‘She can’t walk like this.’
Gabriel looks at my ankle and winces. ‘I can ease the pain a little, like I did for the blister, but I’m not sure whether I can actually heal it. That power seems to reside with Lana herself.’
I frown through the tears that are filling my eyes. ‘Can I heal myself then?’ I say.
‘You could try.’ Gabriel says, crouching beside me and taking my hand. ‘We could both try together. Ready?’
I nod. I see Gabriel close his eyes, so I close mine too. At first all I can sense is the pain, it’s overwhelming. It makes me feel hopeless and frightened. Then there’s something else, a thread of golden light that I can sense wrapping itself around my ankle. I feel a sense of relief as the pain lessens a little. That must be Gabriel’s magic. I can see it.
‘Wow,’ I murmur.
‘See if you can join my magic with your own,’ Gabriel says.
My magic. I still can’t believe I have any such thing.
I try to remember how I healed Gabriel and Alex. It doesn’t help though. With Gabriel I did the skin-to-skin climb into bed with him butt naked thing, and with Alex – well I don’t even remember it happening, to be honest. So instead I focus on the thread, and try to let the golden glow become stronger, like a spark that begins to flare when you blow on it gently as you try to build a fire. At first nothing happens. I keep trying. Nothing happens. Just as I’m about to give up, I sense a change, it’s as though the golden threads are growing wider and longer and the brightness more intense. I feel the pain fade even more.
I gasp. It’s like something from within me is pouring out, and I can feel Gabriel too – not just that he’s sitting next to me and we’re holding hands, but some essence of his power that is calling to an essence of my own power. It feels strange and very intimate.
‘Alright, that’s enough Lana, let’s see how the ankle is now.’
I try to draw myself back, to stop this flow of energy out into the world, but I realise as I try, I don’t know how to. It’s out of my control. I feel the energy pouring out of me, like heat rushing out from the centre of my chest, pouring into the world.
‘Lana?’ I hear Gabriel say, and this time his voice has an edge of worry to it.
I try to speak but I can’t. I can’t find the words. I feel the energy flowing into the forest, up towards the sky, bright and brilliant, shining like a beacon.
‘Lana stop,’ Alex says, and I feel his hands on my arms, his grip too hard. It’s going to leave bruises.
I can’t stop. I try to open my eyes, but I don’t even know where they are now, it’s like I’ve left my body behind and exist in a realm of pure, brilliant light…
‘Gabriel, something’s wrong, you have to bring her back…’
Darkness surrounds me. It is hard and cold, old and very, very strong. It whispers one word: Return.
I blink and cough. The world comes back to me, but it looks faded now as though I’m seeing it through a gauze and from a distance. I try to stand up, but everything spins around me and I have to sit down with my head between my knees.
‘Well that’s fucking excellent, Gabriel. Good work. Great idea.’ Alex sounds pissed.
‘She has overextended herself,’ Gabriel says. ‘That’s all.’
I open my eyes again and look up at where the sky seems a million miles above me. I see a stream of crows flying high, one after another after another, in the direction of the distant mountain range and I feel a sudden panic. We’re meant to be flying with them. They’re not waiting for us. We’re going to miss our chance. The crows look so real I’m sure that they’re actually there, but my brain knows that there are too many of them – way, way too many. It can’t possibly be real.
‘Here, drink this,’ Gabriel murmurs and pulls a small flask from within his cloak, uncaps it and presses it to my lips. The liquid is sweet and warming and I feel the warmth spread within me.
I take a deeper breath and look around again. The world seems to have returned to its correct dimensions. The colours are back. The spinning has stopped. I can’t see any trace of the crows.
‘What happened?’ I ask, looking to where Gabriel’s face is so close to mine, his expression both worried and proud.
‘You used your powers, Lana,’ he smiles gently. ‘It can feel a little strange the first few times. But I sensed your magic, it was strong.’
‘Here, help me up,’ I reach for his hand and wince as he supports me as I stand. My ankle feels strange – weak, vulnerable, but not painful. I take a careful step and I’m surprised to feel that it can bear my weight.
‘Will you be okay to walk?’ Alex asks, taking his position by my side, and taking hold of my hand protectively.
‘I think I’ll be fine. It’s really weird. I can’t feel a thing now, it’s just like I never twisted it. Let’s go. We can try and catch up with the others.’
I pull my pack on and we start the descent again. I check carefully every time I put my foot down, but the magic holds and the pain doesn’t return.
Every now and again I think I see, watching from a tree top or swooping between the branches, a single black crow.
20
LANA
The work is almost finished by the time we reach the end of the path. The three werewolves have dragged a dozen huge boulders down from the side of the mountain. They’re creating a wall that will block the road completely.
For the first time since we started, I try to imagine how this plan will actually work.
‘What are the chances we can get Briony back without anyone being killed?’ I ask Alex in a whisper.
‘Hey, I’m a gambling man by nature. I’ve always liked long odds,’ he says and gives me a grim smile.
‘It’s too obvious,’ I say, looking at the rock wall that the werewolves have constructed. ‘There’s no way that they’ll think it’s just a rockfall. As soon as they see it, they’ll be suspicious. It should look more random.’
‘Do you want to tell the sweaty, angry werewolves that or shall I? Because I probably won’t,’ Alex says.
I look at Reuben and Andreas. They’re working in furious, determined silence, occasionally casting one another dark glances like each blames the other for this situation we’re in.
I walk down the last section of the mountain path and reach the road.
‘Um, can I make a suggestion?’ I say.
Reuben glances up at me and for a moment his eyes soften.
‘Took your time,’ Vera says from behind me.
‘We had some minor delays,’ Alex responds smoothly. I’m glad he doesn’t mention my sprained ankle. I feel like an idiot for tripping over my own foot when these wolves could just about run down the mounta
inside blindfolded and still get to the bottom safely.
‘What’s your suggestion, cub,’ Reuben asks gently.
‘These rocks. They’re too neat. They need to be more chaotic. Like, if it was a real rockfall they’d be all over the place, not piled on top of one another like that.’
Andreas growls, and I take a quick step back.
‘She has a point,’ Reuben says.
‘If you want them to think it’s a genuine accident, not a trap that is,’ I say.
‘What I want is to see their fucking faces when they realise they’re surrounded right before we slaughter every last one of them,’ Andreas growls.
‘What?’ I say, my eyes growing wider.
‘You heard me,’ he says. ‘What do you think the weapons are for? I’ll give you a clue, they’re not for cutting our goddamned sandwiches. They took our children. They’re going to pay.’
‘But it was you who invited the Demon Council to the camp,’ I frown at Andreas. ‘What the hell did you think would happen?’
Andreas lets a low rumble fill his throat.
‘That’s enough,’ Alex says, drawing me back by his side. ‘I don’t think rationality is really his strong suit right now. These guys get a bit crazy when the moon gets close to full. That’s at the best of times. And this is clearly not the best of times.’
‘I don’t want anyone else to die,’ I say. ‘That wasn’t the idea. It’s not meant to be an ambush, it’s meant to be a rescue mission.’
‘It will be what it will be,’ Alex says. ‘I don’t know that we’ll be able to stop them if they’re on a revenge kick.’
I look to Reuben, who’s shifting one of the rocks so it lies closer to the edge of the road.
‘Is that what you want Reuben? Revenge?’
‘All I want,’ he growls as he drags the rock slowly, inch by inch, ‘is to see my daughter safe.’
But even as he says it, he looks deadly: covered in sweat, muscles roping his arms and shoulders, eyes dark with anger. Let him near the demons who took his daughter, and anything could happen.