by Jamie Knight
“How did you know about the money?” I asked perplexed.
“The pictures we received came with a typed note. It said that you paid her to do these things.” He tapped the pictures. “If that is true then I think it is safe to assume that your engagement is not really real, true?”
My breath caught and I didn’t know what to say. Suddenly this whole thing seemed like a confused mess. I dropped my shoulders and tried to figure out what I was going to tell Eileen’s brothers that wouldn’t make things worse.
“Can I sit down?” I asked.
“No,” all three men replied.
I groaned to myself, feeling annoyed at being tested this way. “Yes, the engagement is fake. I asked Eileen to do the sex show as a favor to me. The money was an added incentive because I knew she was new to…displays like that. We dated for a few weeks a few months ago, so I felt comfortable asking her. Then we ran into Sarah, your ex, and well, things got complicated. Eileen didn’t want you to think she was having random sex in Vegas with her boss, so she claimed that I was her fiancé. Her plan was to break up in a few weeks and go our separate ways.”
All three men looked at me; their expressions hadn’t changed, so I couldn’t tell what they were thinking. Jake reached up and scratched the goatee on his chin.
“You said her plan was to break it off?” he asked for clarification.
“Yes.”
“What was your plan?”
I stood up straighter a bit, shocked that he had picked up on that detail in my speech. I shouldn’t have been surprised. Jake was one of the best lawyers in New York.
“I…” I stammered, uncomfortable with saying what had just been made apparent to myself. “I was hoping to get her comfortable with my sexual appetites and marry her for real.”
Three sets of identical golden-brown eyes went wider.
“You love her?” Will asked.
“I do love her.” The words were quiet; they barely came to my lips. But it was the truth. It had been the truth for a while. “I just want Eileen to love me with a full understanding of who I am and what I need.”
They all nodded. Some of the tension left the room. Oddly enough, they all seemed to understand perfectly what I was talking about. Perhaps they had fetishes too. I tried to search my mind to see if I could remember any of them being at The Dark Club, but I didn’t think so.
Jake stood and moved around my desk to join his brothers.
“I like you, Ray, but this needs to be dealt with as quickly as possible. Eileen doesn’t deal with embarrassment well and if this embarrasses her then we will sue you for definition of character and say that you doctored these photos to make them look like our sister. I can assure you that no matter what court we have the trial in, we will win.”
I looked the boys straight in the face. “I understand.” I reached out to shake Jake’s hand.
“What the hell?!”
The four of us turned and saw that Eileen was standing in my doorway. Her mouth was hanging open and her face was as white as a ghost. I followed her gaze and realized that she was looking at the pictures on my desk.
“Ray?!” she stammered, stepping back one step. Her whole body was shaking with anger. “Why the hell are you showing those pictures to my brothers? What in the world would possess you to do such a thing?” She clenched her fists at her side.
“Eileen, you don’t understand…”
She held a hand up to stop me. “You know what? I don’t care what your reasoning is. This is sick. So sick. I should have never agreed to your crazy ball and your embarrassing practices.” Her face was getting redder by the second and tears started to line her eyes. “And now my brothers know. This is just all so sick. Fuck you, Ray! I never want to see you again!”
Putting her hands up to her face, Eileen started bawling. She turned on her heels and ran for the elevator.
All her brothers turned to look at me. Their faces slack with amazement.
“Do I go after her?” I asked them.
All three shook their heads and looked slightly scared for me.
“No, she will just punch you. Hard,” Jake admitted. “Probably knock you cold.” He absentmindedly rubbed his arm like it hurt. “Best to let her have an hour and then try to explain when she isn’t as wound up.”
I nodded, but my heart was breaking. Did I just lose Eileen for good?
Chapter Twenty-Four
Eileen
The door to the elevator opened just as I was running towards it. I didn’t wait for whoever was on it to get off, so I charged right into Sloane knocking her into the back wall.
“What the fuck?” she huffed. Her narrow face pulled into a frown. She stepped away from me and brushed off the designer pants-suit she was wearing.
Still sniffling and panting with anger, I slammed my hand into the button that closed the elevator doors. I didn’t want to give Ray a chance to follow me in here and have me trapped. I didn’t care what his explanation was for those awful pictures or why he was ruining my life.
“Eileen? What the hell? That was the floor I wanted. I have a meeting with Ashton right now!” Sloane snapped besides me.
I ignored her protests and crossed my arms in front of my chest. “I have to get to the ground floor now. I’m leaving and quitting.” I sucked in a few breaths and tried to stop crying.
Sloane usually had a bitchy look on her face, but it softened at my words. “Something happen between you and Ray?” she asked quietly.
Did she see the pictures too?!
I turned quickly and fought the urge to grab her shoulder. Sloane and I had come a long way towards being friends, but the girl did not like to be touched.
“What did you see?!” I demanded.
Sloane shrugged a bit and waved her hand in the air. “Just rumors, Le Le.”
I smacked my hand into my forehead. “Don’t call me that!”
Sloane giggled. “It’s all over Watercooler that you and Ray are back together and are sneaking around trying to keep HR from finding out. Someone, I don’t remember who, said they saw you two at JFK airport together getting off a flight to Vegas on Sunday.”
“Where there pictures?” I snapped. “Did anyone post pictures of us?”
Sloane shook her head. “No…” she gave me another smile. “Is it true? Are you and Ray back together?”
I turned away and crossed my arms over my chest again. “No, it’s not true. I just went with him to a conference in Vegas.”
“So, it wasn’t a sexy trip?” Sloane prodded.
“Not at all!”
The elevator opened at the ground floor. I was out of it in a second and out the front doors. My purse was still in my cubical, but my neighbor had a spare key to my apartment. I had to get out of McKenzie Tech now. It was all so embarrassing.
Who knew who else Ray had shown those horrid pictures too? Maybe even Kane and Reese. They were all part of the same twisted club, right? Maybe they were all looking at the pictures and laughing at me.
As I strode down the street towards my home, I kept thinking of my brothers and Ray all crowed together into his office. Why would he ever do that to me? And after I had done such a big thing for him? It just seemed outrageous and I started to cry again.
****
Mr. Pugsly snuffled my face. His cold, black nose hit a sensitive spot under my chin causing me to become fully awake and I stared up into his lopsided face. The pug grunted a bit and started licking my cheeks until I laughed.
“That’s my good boy,” I whispered as I scratched under his chin and his ears. He leaned into my touch, grunting happily.
It was a little after six in the evening. After seeing Ray and my brothers looking at those pictures, I had run home and cried until I fell asleep. I had managed to nap most of the afternoon, but it really didn’t make me feel much better.
I rolled over in bed and looked at my somewhat crumpled dress suit. Back at the office, I hadn’t even bothered to clock out before I left. I had just r
un out, too embarrassed to see or talk to anyone. Not that it mattered. If I didn’t get fired, I was going to have to quit. I could never go back there again.
Tears started to spring to my eyes. Why would Ray show my brothers those pictures? It was a nightmare. It just didn’t make any sense. Sure, he had suggested that I tell them the truth back in Vegas, but I thought that he understood that my family wouldn’t feel the way his uncle did about the show.
Pugsly yipped at me. I had stopped scratching him and was just holding my hand on his head absentmindedly. I looked over at my loyal companion. He gave me a big doggie smile.
“Is it time for your dinner?” I asked him.
Pugsly arooed. He hopped off the bed and went trotting into the kitchen like he knew exactly what I was saying.
At least one man in my life understood me.
I pulled myself up and wiped away the tears that were running down my face. All I needed was a plan, I told myself. I would quit, that was a given. There was no way I could ever look Ray in the face again. Would he show the pictures to other people after I was gone? Did it matter?
My cell phone was on the kitchen counter. I had put it on silent. Just like a few days before, it was full of messages and texts. A bunch were from Ray.
I couldn’t stand listening to his voice, but I scrolled through a few of the texts he sent.
Eileen, you don’t understand.
Eileen, please call me.
This wasn’t my idea.
There were quite a few like that. None of it made me feel better. The last one read: I put you in for sick time for the next few days. Please call me when you think you can talk.
I was quite sure that I would never be ready to talk to Ray again.
Leaning over, I stooped to get into the cabinet that held the dog food. I opened a can and poured it into Pugsly’s bowl. I had been using a plain cereal bowl. Maybe I should get him something fancier.
I dropped the bowl in front of my waiting pup and then crossed the room to my laptop. In a few minutes, I was searching for designer dog bowls. I knew it was just a distraction, but it was nice to get my mind off the present mess of my life.
Besides, I had a million-dollar check from Ray in my coat pocket and I sure as hell was going to deposit it now. In fact, I would do that right away.
I got up from my desk and crossed to the coat closet by the front door. There was a knock at the front door when I was inches away from it. I jumped and yelped a bit.
“Le Le?” Jake’s raised voice came to me from behind the door. “Are you okay? Open up!”
I didn’t want to let my younger brother in, but if I didn’t, he would probably knock down the door. So, I flipped the lock, opened the front door and went back to the coat closet.
Jake barged through the door in a panic. “Are you okay?” he demanded. “You screamed.”
“You startled me,” I explained, but didn’t look up at him. “I was getting my coat. I wasn’t expecting you.”
Jake frowned and crossed his arms in front of his wide chest. “You should have. If I didn’t have to be in court this afternoon, I would have come by right away. What’s going on, Le Le? I talked to Ray, but I want to hear your side of the story.”
I pulled my coat out of the closet and felt around in the pocket to get the million-dollar check and set of instructions from Ray. They were both gone. Odd. I pulled the coat off the hanger and felt again. Still no check or paper. Pulling the pockets inside out, I checked the lining for holes, but the stitching was still sound.
Jake watched me the whole time with his bushy eyebrows raised. “What’s going on?” he asked again.
The paper with the performance instructions and the check were gone. My mind just couldn’t process that. Did Ray take them back? He was the only one who had access to our room, but he was always there with me. I supposed that he could have taken it while I was asleep.
Ignoring my brother, I crossed the room and fell on to the couch. Feeling numb, my eyes found the window. I glared outside like out there was something that had answers to this weird mess.
“Do you want a drink?” Jakey asked. His tone was different, less demanding and more comforting.
“Yes,” I told him. “Gin and tonic.”
As Jake busied himself in my kitchen, I kept my eyes on the view outside. I knew my cheeks were red from embarrassment and I didn’t want for my brother to see me as any more messed up then he did now.
Pugsly jumped up on the couch and placed his lopsided head into my lap. He grunted softly until I started to pet him.
Jake set my glass down on the side table and then crossed to sit in the large chair that sat beside my couch. I glanced over at him for a second, just enough to see that he had poured himself several fingers of my good whiskey.
“You’re going to have to replace that, you know?” I mumbled.
Jake took another sip and swallowed loudly. “I was under the impression that you had just become a millionaire. I figured you could easily afford another bottle.”
He was joking, but I didn’t feel merry at all. I downed about half of my gin and tonic and crewed on a lemon peel.
“Apparently not.”
“What?”
“The check Ray gave me is gone.”
Jake grunted slightly. He set his drink down, slumped forward, and put his palms over his eyes.
“Le Le. What is going on?” he asked again. “You used to tell me everything. I felt like we were so close, but the last week has made me feel like I don’t know you at all. Nothing you say makes sense. Its tearing me apart. Beyond you being my sister, you are my best friend. Why are you suddenly not talking to me?”
The sorrow in his voice caused me to turn completely and face him. No matter what Ray had done, I had a lot to fess up too and fix as well.
“I’m sorry, Jakey,” I told him. “I’m not quite sure why I didn’t tell you that Ray and I dated a few months ago. I guess I thought you would advise me against it since he was…is my boss.”
He nodded. “So, it is true. You did date. Ray said the same thing.”
“Yes, it’s true,” I continued. “He dumped me after we slept together once. I wasn’t sure why. Last week he explained that it was because we weren’t compatible or at least at the time he didn’t think we were.”
“Compatible in what way?”
I swallowed. “Sexually.”
Jake paled a bit. “Okay, so you’re not usually into…what was in the pictures…”
“Yes,” I snapped, but I wasn’t quite sure if that was true anymore. If I hadn’t seen Sarah and if my family hadn’t found out would I still be acting like Ray’s…pet? I rubbed my hands over my temples. It was time to be totally honest. “No. I don’t know. It’s all very new to me and honestly, I enjoyed a lot of it.”
“Okay,” Jake nodded. He templed his fingers in his lap. His face was passive, like he was taking the information in and not judging it…or trying not to. “So, where does the money come in? How did you two get back together?”
I took another gulp of my drink—letting the alcohol give me courage. “We didn’t, not really, Ray needed a…partner—” I found that I couldn’t say the word pet to my brother. “—for his show. He asked me to do it and offered me the money. But I never really thought I would deposit the check he gave me until this morning. Now it is gone and I’m not sure how.”
“Do you love him?”
Jake’s question shocked me. I sat up a little straighter disturbing Mr. Pugsly who had just fallen asleep. He grunted in an annoyed fashion.
“What?!” I snapped.
Jake stood. He began to pace back and forth in my narrow living room. “Here’s what I understand. You dated your boss for a few weeks a few months ago. He broke up with you, which caused you to start dating like crazy, which went badly causing you to swear off men and get our friend here.”
He nodded to the pug and then continued to list the circumstances like he was making closing remarks in court.
“Your ex-slash-boss asked you to do a sex show, which you did but now regret, however you’re not truly sure if you regret it. You ran into Sarah and lied, claiming that Ray and you were engaged. A ruse you continued for Dad and us. You could have just told me that Sarah was lying. Hell, I know that girl is crazy. But instead you came up with a plan that would keep you and Ray interacting. And my question is, do you love him?”
My jaw dropped.
Was I unconsciously trying to keep Ray and I acting like we were together? That was just stupid. Tears sprung to my eyes. “I don’t know, Jakey. How can I know that when he showed those dreadful pictures to you guys?!”
“And if he didn’t show them to us?”
“I…” I ran my hands over my face, trying to think clearly. “Sometimes, yes. Maybe.”
“Can you accept that he is into such things sexually?”
I found myself crying and laughing all at the same time. I looked down to my lap. “God, Jake. Don’t judge me.”
“I won’t. I never will, Le Le.”
“The show was a lot of fun. This weekend was the best sex I had even had.”
“Okay.” Jake sat back in the chair and looked at me. “Ray’s being blackmailed. He didn’t show us the pictures. They were sent to us this morning.”
My breath hissed out. “What?! Does he know by who?”
Jake shook his head. “He didn’t say. Sis, as your lawyer. I would advise you to stay away from Ray until he gets this worked out. Even his phone might be bugged.”
I stood quickly. My body trembled. “This is all too much,” I yelped.
I couldn’t process it all: the show, the sex, the lies, the pictures, and now blackmail. My hands balled into fists. I crossed the room, back to the coat closet, and pulled out the black velvet cape Ray had gifted me.
“What are you doing?” My brother asked as he came up behind me.
I found a box in the kitchen, folded the cape, and put it inside. “Ray’s life is too crazy. I don’t care if I love him. I can’t deal with all this drama anymore. I’m done. Whatever I was trying to accomplish with this lie is over. I need to get every part of Ray out of my life. Are you coming?”