With a surge of unfamiliar rebellion, I took the corner out of the gas station faster than I ever had. I didn’t exactly peel out, but I was going a good five miles over the speed limit.
And this weekend, I was going to that house party down the shore. Maybe it wouldn’t end up changing my life . . . but maybe it would.
Find out what happens with Gia, Matt and Tate in Not Broken Anymore
Preludes to Your Wildest Dreams
Zelda
Summer before Freshman Year of College
“For the last time, no.”
I turned around and reached for the handle on the sliding glass door that led back into the house. Before I could tug it open, a large hand covered mine, closing over my fingers.
“Oh, come on, Zelda. What’s it going to hurt? We’ll just take a ride, and I’ll show you around the area while Penny’s busy with Emily. They won’t even notice we’re gone.” He rubbed the side of my hand with his thumb. “What’s the matter? Don’t you like me?”
The truth was, I really didn’t like him. Since I’d arrived at Penny’s house the night before, her boyfriend Ben had been giving me a serious creep vibe. Maybe it was the way his eyes had widened as they lingered on my boobs. Or maybe the way he just happened to graze my ass in the kitchen. Or maybe the way he’d been hounding me about taking a ride in his Jeep all afternoon.
I’d been so excited about this trip. Going away to college was something I’d been itching to do all through high school, and I’d admit I’d built up some pretty big expectations about what the college experience would be. When the girl whom Birch College had assigned as my roommate had emailed to invite me to come visit her for a weekend so we could get acquainted, it seemed like a great idea. She lived in Trenton, New Jersey, which was only a couple of hours from my home in Lancaster.
But from the minute Penny laid eyes on me, I’d been all too aware that I wasn’t the roommate she’d been hoping to have. I’d seen it happen before, when girls took one look at me and jumped to the conclusion that I was the enemy—the kind of girl who’d lure away boyfriends and suck all the energy out of every room.
I’d only been at her house for an hour when Penny announced that her best friend Emily was coming over to spend the night. Emily, apparently, was going to college in New England, and Penny explained that this was the last weekend before she left, so they wanted to spend time together before going their separate ways for the fall. I wouldn’t have minded except that once Emily arrived, Penny began to ignore my existence.
That was why I was out here on the back porch with Ben, while Penny and Emily were in the kitchen, making cookies.
I realized he was still waiting for my response. “I don’t know you well enough to say whether or not I like you. But I don’t think a lot of a guy who’s flirting with another girl when he’s already got a girlfriend.”
Ben rolled his eyes. “Things aren’t like that with Penny and me. I mean, sure, she calls me her boyfriend, but we’re . . . casual. You know how it is. We’re going to different colleges, and neither of us wants to do the long-distance deal. So it’s totally cool for you and me to, uh, hang out.”
“Uh huh.” I shrugged off his hand. “I think I’m going inside to see what the girls are doing. But I appreciate your offer.”
I slid the door open just enough to slip inside and made my way toward the kitchen. I was about to turn the corner when I heard my name.
“I mean, Zelda. What kind of name is that, anyway?” Penny’s voice dripped with derision.
“When I told my mom about her, she said that sounded like a stripper name,” Emily snickered.
“I wouldn’t be surprised if she was a stripper,” Penny scoffed. “Look at her. I can’t believe I get stuck with a girl like her for a roommate.”
“Hey, look at it this way. You’ll meet lots of guys if she has a revolving door to her bed, like we think. There’s always that.”
“Like I want her sloppy seconds. Please. She’s the kind of girl who you could never trust around a boyfriend. She probably doesn’t have any morals.”
I wasn’t a stranger to mean girls, and I could usually give as good as I got. But the pure vitriol from these women stung, mostly because I’d hoped for so much better.
Pivoting on my heel, I stalked back outside, where Ben was tugging his keys from a pocket in his jeans.
“Hey,” I called. “That offer still stand? For the ride, I mean.”
Ben paused, looking me up and down, his lips curving. “I think so. And I tell you what—I might even let you drive if you want.” He cocked his head. “You drive stick?”
My eyelids drooped slightly as I gave him a half-smile. If I was going to be accused of being the kind of girl who’d sleep with someone else’s boyfriend, I was damn sure going to live up to that—and I was going to have fun doing it.
“Oh, baby. Stick is my specialty.”
Tuck
Senior Year of High School
The locker room was loud—louder than it normally was before a game. Next to my locker, Hudson, the kicker, was doing some kind of complicated dance, singing at the top of his lungs as he executed the moves.
I grinned as I positioned my pads and pulled on my uniform. I loved this, the atmosphere of being with my teammates before we launched out onto the field to play a game. The mood was upbeat and ebullient, because at this moment in time, we could do anything. We could take on any team. We were winners.
“Worcester’s going down tonight!” Drew Compton, who was both my best friend and my favorite receiver, slapped my shoulder pads. “I heard them pussies just about rolled over and begged for mercy last week when they played Eatonboro.”
“Eatonboro’s got a good team,” I observed, closing my locker door before I sank onto the bench to put on my cleats. “Lampert’s arm is fucking amazing—I’ve seen him play. And they’ve got that guy—the tight end—who’s been playing varsity since he was a sophomore. Tyler?”
“Taylor,” Drew corrected. “Yeah, they’re decent. But still. We womped them last year, and we’ll do it again in a few weeks.”
“You know it.” I held out my fist and Drew pounded it, just as we both heard Coach’s voice bellow over the noise.
“Okay, boys! Gather round. Time to talk some football.”
It was the perfect night for a football game. I didn’t like to complain when it came to weather, because I’d play the game in heat, humidity or a blizzard, but there was just something about a crisp fall evening, when the breeze was enough to make me shiver—or would’ve been if I wasn’t on the field under the lights, covered in pads, and running my fool ass off.
On the sidelines, the cheerleaders were chanting, and in the stands, the band played one of the school’s fight songs. The bleachers were crowded tonight; when I squinted that way, I couldn’t spot even one empty seat. I knew my parents were up there somewhere, probably boasting about their son. I grinned in the direction of their normal seats and gave a wave.
“So Tucker, I hear Dena James has been hanging around you all week. You gonna hit that tonight?” Dalton, one of the left guards, smirked at me. “She’s a fucking hot piece of tail. Those tits, that ass . . .” He whistled. “I can’t believe you haven’t hooked up with her yet.”
“God, Dalton, she just transferred here this year. She’s been here all of, what? A month?” I nudged him in the ribs. “Give me some time. I like a girl to get real hot and hungry for it before I finally give in.”
“Think maybe we should be talking about the next play and not Tucker’s next lay?” Drew glanced over his shoulder. “Their time out’s almost up. And we’ve got a minute thirty before the half. Be nice to score one more time and ride into the locker room on that high.”
“Settle down. We’re already up by two TDs.” I shook my head. “But you know what, Drewsy, baby? Just for you, I’m gonna lob one straight down the center of the field. You take off for the end zone and see if you can’t catch it. How does that sound?”
<
br /> All the guys laughed, as the ref blew the whistle and we broke huddle. We formed at the line of scrimmage, and I inhaled deep through my nose, appreciating the scent of the cut grass, the food from the concession stands, and the sweat of the men around me. I felt the cool turf under my fingers, and I heard the low voice of Connor Lee, our center, as he muttered the snap count.
Seconds later, the ball was in my hands, and I was stutter-running backward. In those moments, it was as though I could see two different scenes simultaneously: the chaos around me as my guards and tackles did their jobs, keeping the opposing team away from me, and the wide-open space at the other end of the field, where my receivers were jockeying for position and trying to elude the defenders.
I’d just drawn back my arm for the pass when a movement at the corner of my eye distracted me. My guys had done a great job of giving me time to throw the ball, but somehow, one of Worcester’s defensive tackles had slipped around them and was heading toward me. I realized I had nanoseconds to get rid of the fucking ball before I got hit.
Frantically, I searched beyond the crash of helmets and pads around me to see if Drew had gotten clear. He was there, and I was out of time. With a grunt, I sent the ball spiraling down the field.
It had just left my hand when I felt the hit. Still slightly off balance from the throw, I couldn’t keep to my feet. I twisted sideways and took the brunt of the blow to my ribs and back.
If I’d gone down then, I would’ve jumped to my feet seconds later, ready for the next play. If I’d let myself fall to the ground, everything in my life would’ve been different.
But I didn’t. Out of instinct or bravado or who the hell knows what, I bent away from the initial hit, not knowing that another defender had broken through and was aiming for me. If he realized I’d already thrown the ball, he didn’t show any sign of it. He didn’t slow down. Instead, he came at me, his shoulder ramming against my helmet.
I heard the crack. It was unlike anything I could’ve ever imagined—the sound of my own back breaking—and it made me want to vomit. I felt myself falling until the grass was poking into my arms and the lights above were blinding me. I was vaguely aware of pain in my side, of people shouting and of feet running near me.
And then, there was nothing but silence.
Zelda and Tuck’s story is told in Your Wildest Dreams.
Preludes to Sway
Sarah
Summer after College Graduation
“Okay, so just what the hell was that all about? Back there at the grocery store?”
Leo glanced at me and then returned his attention to the road in front of us. “What do you mean?”
I crossed my arms over my chest and shifted in the passenger seat to face Leo more fully. “I mean, the part where we ran into Quinn, and you deliberately made her think you and I were together.”
He wore an expression of guarded innocence. “I didn’t do anything.”
“Oh, buddy, wise up and do it now. Because I am not down with that shit. I’m not some decoy you can use to make your ex-girlfriend jealous.”
Leo snorted. “Why would I want to do that? Why would I even care? She’s—well, you know the whole story, so I don’t need to rehash it. Just trust me—I don’t have any agenda when it comes to Quinn.”
I rolled my eyes. “Let me remind you of who I am. I’m the one who had box seats to your drama all during high school. You can’t fool me. And don’t treat me like a moron.”
“I would never do that.” Now Leo was trotting out the righteous indignation. “I’m just saying that you’re mistaken. You’re seeing things that aren’t there.”
“Look here, Leo.” I exhaled long. “I only agreed to come up here with you this weekend because I promised my mom I’d come home for the Fourth of July, and I thought a road trip with you might be fun. I did not come up to be used to make Quinn, my friend, jealous because you’re still sulking. If you pull that shit again, I swear I will never talk to you for the rest of our lives. We’re friends, Leo, and that’s all we’re ever going to be, because you are loopy in love with that girl back there, and I’m not ever going to play consolation prize again. Got it?”
He was silent for several long moments. “Got it. Would it help if I apologized?”
“That’s a good start.” I smiled sweetly.
“Okay, then, I’m sorry. And while I’m at it, I should apologize for what happened in high school, when I dated you even though I should’ve known better. You were a class act then, and you’re still one now. So I’m sorry, and thank you.”
“Apology accepted.” I sighed and pushed my sunglasses more firmly on my nose. “For what it’s worth, Leo, I’m sorry, too, that things are so fucked up between you and Quinn and Nate. I always thought it was so cool, the three of you being friends. I hate to see what it’s come to now.”
“Yeah.” Leo’s voice was clipped, and I knew he didn’t want to talk about this anymore. “Before we ran into Quinn, you were telling me about college—what it was like to go to school at Georgetown. Did you date football players there, too?”
“Ugh.” I pretended to gag. “No, when I got down there, the first thing I did was enroll in the football player detox program. I needed that after four years at Eatonboro, believe me. I made it a rule to only go out with artists, musicians and computer geeks. No athletes whatsoever.”
“Awww, we’re not so bad, are we?” He gave me the puppy dog eyes.
“Yes, in fact, you are. I don’t need that kind pain in my life, bud.”
“That’s a shame. I’ve met some of the guys on my new team, and I could totally set you up. You know—I could have you come down to a game and introduce you to a bunch.”
“Thank you, but no. I like my metrosexuals. They can talk politics and culture, and they love to eat at the same trendy restaurants I do. Not like football Neanderthals who only want to discuss the season and where to get the best raw meat for dinner.” I set my lips primly and stared out the window.
“That sounds boring as hell to me. Also, since when are you such an elitist? And a judgmental elitist at that. You’re stereotyping all athletes based on your limited experience. Some of us are all around fucktabulous people.” He raised his eyebrows.
“I’m not an elitist, and I’m not judging. I just know what I like. And it’s not football players.” I paused. “Present company excluded.”
“Hmm.” Leo seemed to be mulling that over. “Are you dating anyone now? Like, seriously dating?”
I shook my head. “No, I’m too busy with work to date. I have a social life, but the last thing I need is a boyfriend who I have to worry about pleasing. I like things the way they are now, thanks.”
“Still.” Leo was a stubborn son of a bitch—I’d always known that. He wasn’t giving up. “I’m just saying, if I were to invite you down to see a game, and you met a football player . . .”
“I’d be nice and polite, but nothing more.” I could dig my heels in, too. “I’m sure you’re right and that there are some perfectly wonderful athletes out there. Men who can have deep conversations and are sensitive to their partners’ needs. But I’m also sure that even if they do exist, they’re not for me.”
“But Sarah—”
I held up my hand. “Mark my words, Leo. No matter how amazing and perfect he might be, I will never, never, never fall in love with a football player. So help me, God.”
Gideon
I hated these fucking parties.
Well, let’s be real. I hated all parties, no matter where they were or who was throwing them. I hated my parents’ parties worst of all, but that was an entirely different story.
Ellie and Corey Iverson’s parties, though . . . they were torture because I felt bad about hating them. I felt guilty because Ellie clearly poured so much of herself into these events and truly cared if we were all having a good time, which meant that I had to make a real effort to pretend I was. And even so, I was pretty sure she always saw through me, to the unhappiness an
d dread.
It had been one thing when I was still dating Lilly. Then, at least, I had someone in my corner, both literally and figuratively. Lilly didn’t love the parties any more than I did, but what they say about misery loving company is true, because we commiserated and got through them.
But Lilly was no longer a part of my life, and thinking about her was only going to make it harder to survive this evening.
“Gideon?” Ellie Iverson sat down next to me on the couch. “Do you need a refill?”
I lifted my glass, still three quarters of the way full. “No, thanks, I’m good.”
“Hmmm.” Ellie tilted her head, studying me. “There are some lovely women here tonight. Want me to introduce you to one? Or two?”
When I began to answer, she shook her head, holding up her hand.
“I’m not suggesting setting you up, Gideon. I’m just saying so you’d have someone to talk to. You look a little lonely.”
I’m always lonely. The words were on the tip of my tongue, but I swallowed them down. That wasn’t the sentiment anyone expected of Gideon Maynard.
“Nah, just . . . you know. Taking it all in.” I smiled at her briefly. The thing was, I liked Ellie. Her heart was huge, and she spread love all over our team like nobody’s business. No one could be sad or in pain too long around Ellie—she was a fixer, and she wanted everyone to be happy.
She also wanted everyone to be matched up. There was a running joke on the team that if Ellie Iverson could marry off the entire squad to her beloved sorority sisters, she would. She’d introduced enough of them to enough of us. Only a couple had stuck, though, and even those seemed to be more casual relationships than anything serious.
But tonight, we were celebrating a match that was already made. My teammate Leo Taylor had just gotten engaged, and even though Ellie hadn’t had anything to do with the impending nuptials, she had happily offered to host the engagement party. That was another reason why I’d felt compelled to come tonight. I’d do anything to support my team.
The Keeping Score Box Set Page 6