by Lynn Howard
“Do you think one of them would say something?” she asked, clutching the empty cool glass between her hands.
He must’ve feared she’d break the glass and gently extricated it from her hands, setting it on the nightstand beside the bed.
“Not on purpose.” He was using the same gruff tone he used with customers at Moe’s. He was not happy with her. But it was more than being mad; his fear was making her heart speed up.
“I need you to calm down, Noah. I feel too yucky to deal with your emotions, too,” she admitted. She lowered her head into her hands. She had to get out of bed. She needed a shower before work. And if Noah was going in, she could, too. She knew he felt as bad as she did and he’d hardly had anything to drink. It wasn’t fair to him.
Noah watched her as she threw the blankets off and stood, grabbing anything nearby to keep steady. He reached for her, but dropped his hand when she swatted it away.
As she shuffled to the bathroom, one hand on the wall, she realized how shitty she was being to him. She’d apologize after. For now, she was focusing on not puking again. The last thing she wanted to do was make Noah feel worse.
But she had warned him. She’d warned him he’d feel her emotions, he’d feel anytime she was in pain. She just hadn’t thought about the fact Shifters didn’t get sick. He’d finally know how it felt if she ever got a virus. He’d feel every ache and pain. Poor guy.
As she showered, she tried to conjure memories of last night. She’d actually used her magic in front of everyone, then proceeded to tell them exactly what she was. Great. And he feared one of them might slip in front of the wrong people.
But what worried her was the fact there were more people to keep her secret. Why the hell had Aron brought her here? He knew how close knit these people were, he knew there were cubs in the wolf Pack. Why would he risk his friends’ lives?
Fate. That word bounced around inside her head again. She’d wondered before if her magic hadn’t let her get caught because it knew what was coming. Her magic knew Noah was waiting for her, even if he didn’t know he was looking for her.
If it was fate that brought Noah and Hollyn together, that had to mean all the people her magic had brought into her life would be safe. Right?
Something like anger bubbled up deep inside of her. She followed the thread; not her anger. Noah was angry at something or someone. Was his bear getting restless again? As hot as his way of marking her was, she wasn’t in the mood. She worried if she even tried to make love to Noah, she’d end up puking on him. Not exactly sexy.
Hollyn ended the spray and scrubbed off with the towel. Once her hair and teeth were brushed, she forewent the makeup for the day, and headed to the bedroom to get dressed. She wanted to be completely covered when she sought out Noah. Just in case.
Dressed with shoes on, she pushed off the bed. The glass of water and shower made her feel closer to normal, but it would be at least a day before she got rid of all the symptoms of her hangover.
Nope. Never drinking again.
Noah was standing in the gravel in front of the cabin, his arms crossed over his chest. Carter stood across from him, Luke leaned against the truck, and Colton leaned against the railing. All four of them looked pissed.
As she stepped onto the porch, all four sets of eyes jerked to her. “Where’s Shawnee?” Hollyn asked instead of diving straight into the whole what the hell was going on?
“Getting ready for work,” Colton said, a smile tipping the corners of his lips. The anger was still evident in the faint glow in his eyes, but he was one of those people who always looked happy.
When no one said anything else, just kept staring at her like they were waiting for her to go back inside, she slapped her hands on her hips. “This is obviously about me. I could feel your anger in the shower.”
Noah looked away; his jaw clenched so tight she worried he’d crack a molar.
“What’s going on?” she asked.
“Other than Big River, have you told anyone else about…your heritage?” Carter asked, wording it carefully. There was no reason; the four Shifters standing around knew before she’d ever blabbed.
“No. Why?”
“You’re sure,” Carter said. “You never used your magic at the bar?”
Hollyn turned her attention to Noah as that anger he’d felt inside mixed with fear. A lot of it. “Other than fire breathing, no. And they all think I’m blowing alcohol. It’s a fairly popular trick. No way would anyone put two and two together from just that.”
“Well, someone did,” Carter said, rubbing the back of his neck.
Luke’s eyes blazed brighter than Hollyn had ever seen them and he looked like he was strung tight as a bow. She no longer feared any of the Shifters she’d come to know, but at that moment, Luke was pretty freaking scary.
“What?” she asked when her throat threatened to close. “Just tell me.”
“Aron called,” Carter said. “The assholes he was chasing disappeared. He got word they were spotted heading this way.”
“They’re coming here?” Hollyn whispered. She couldn’t make her voice any louder. She could barely breathe. She looked at Noah, looked at the people who had taken her in and given her a family. She needed to go. She needed to run far away from them. She needed to lure the danger away from the people she loved more than herself.
Noah’s hand went to his chest and he winced. He could feel her pain at the thought of leaving them behind. He could feel her trying to break the bond. If he couldn’t feel her, he couldn’t follow her, and he’d be safe.
“What are you doing?” Noah gritted out between clenched teeth.
Shit. She was causing him too much pain. But it needed to be done. It was the only way to protect him.
“Hollyn,” he said, climbing the steps and pulling her into his arms, wrapping himself around her as much as he could. “You’re safe. Nothing’s going to happen. Stop.”
What did he think he felt? What did he think she was doing? Did he think it was a mere case of fear causing that ache? It didn’t matter. With him holding her like that she realized there was no way she could successfully sever the magic between them. It was too strong. Their connection was too strong.
And she loved him too much.
Did he realize she wasn’t afraid for herself? Not anymore. She had her magic. She had her fire. She feared for the Shifters, for the bear Clan, for the wolf Pack, for the babies. She feared for her family. She feared for her husband. They might not have gotten married in a human church or court, but their union couldn’t be broken by any judge, either.
Noah’s chin rested on the top of Hollyn’s head and he slowly rocked them side to side.
“I need to go, Noah. I can’t stay here,” Hollyn whispered as he continued that rocking motion. At her words, he went stock still, his arms tensed around her and he took a step back, still holding her.
“What are you trying to tell me, Hollyn?” he asked. She felt his pain, his confusion, his fear in her heart.
“I can’t stay here, Noah. I can’t. If they come looking for me—”
“I’ll keep you safe. We’ll keep you safe,” Noah said, his brows pulling low.
“That’s what I’m afraid of. If it’s just me…” She sighed. “I need to know you’re safe. And if I’m here, they’re going to come here. What if you get hurt? Or Shawnee? Or even the wolves? There are children there. Micah was right; my presence puts everyone in danger.”
Hollyn pulled from his arms and backed away. She felt her magic reaching for him, trying to pull her back into his arms. But she needed space. She needed to think.
“I think that’s our decision to make,” Carter said.
Hollyn frowned in his direction. “What do you mean?”
“Whether you’re a danger to us or not,” Carter said.
She’d just thought it and said it, but hearing Carter say it cut her deep. Did they feel the same way Micah did?
“Colton, you have Shawnee,” Hollyn said, tu
rning her eyes to Colton. Surely, he’d agree with her.
“I know,” he said. Two words. That was it.
“And? Aren’t you worried about her?”
“Hollyn—” Noah started, reaching for her, but she backed out of his reach.
“What about your friends in Big River? What about the babies?”
“Enough!” Noah roared, his bear bright in his eyes. Like they had when he’d released on her, his eyes bled back and forth between brown and amber. She’d never seen a Shifter’s eyes react like that, never seen someone fight for control over their own body so hard as she had with Noah.
His hands raised to his head and he gripped his short hair tight. He was struggling to remain in his skin. She’d managed to piss off not just her husband, but his bear, as well.
****
Noah continued to tug on his hair, using the sting of his scalp to steady himself. Was Hollyn seriously talking about leaving? She was going to just take off after binding them with her magic? How the fuck did she think that would be possible? How could she think he’d just let her disappear to fight these fuckers alone? How could she even think about leaving Noah? How could she think he’d let her walk away without him?
“Noah,” Carter warned, his foot on the first step leading up to his porch. “Come down here, brother. You’re too close to Hollyn.”
Shit. He was so close to Shifting with Hollyn within feet of him. Even though his bear knew her, would know her no matter what, that didn’t mean it was safe for him to explode into his animal near her.
With jerky steps, Noah backed away from Hollyn and climbed down the stairs. His body was vibrating so hard he couldn’t see clearly. Couldn’t make out the faces of his Clan. Never. In all his years, he’d never been so out of control, so lost to his beast.
Once Noah was far enough from Hollyn to ensure her safety, he turned and looked up at her. She stood, her hands gripping the railing, her eyes wide as she waited. Waited for Noah to calm down, waited for Noah to Shift. Waited for him to let her just walk away. He didn’t know, and she probably didn’t either. She looked unsure, heartbroken. He pressed the heel of his hand to his chest and realized he couldn’t feel her. They’d realized they didn’t feel the smaller stuff, like irritation over things like a broken bottle. But with the news she’d received, he should be able to feel her as strongly as he felt his own.
“You’re blocking me,” he growled out. His mouth became crowded as his teeth Shifted.
Her lips were parted, but she didn’t say anything, just watched him closely.
He thought about the agonizing pain he’d felt when Hollyn found out the traffickers might or might not be heading their way. Had she broken their bond?
Searching deep, he still felt her presence, still felt her magic, still felt her heart beating in rhythm with his. She was blocking her emotion from him to help him calm down. It had the opposite effect on his bear. He became panicked, crazed.
“Fuck,” Noah muttered, turning his eyes to Carter to warn him to guard Hollyn. Because his bear was intent on marking her permanently. Opening his mouth to warn Carter, Luke, anyone to get Hollyn away from him, his voice was swallowed by the roar of his bear.
Within less than a second, he lost the battle for his skin and looked through the eyes of his bear. He kept trying to push Noah to the back, kept trying to block him, kept trying for full control. And Noah fought just as hard to stay in Bear’s head.
Bear turned toward the porch, lifted his head, and released a bellow. Hollyn slapped her hands over her ears. Noah tried to use their connection to warn her, to tell her to run, to get in one of the trucks and head to Big River. Either the connection was truly blocked, or it just didn’t work that way.
She didn’t run. She didn’t even head into the house. She just stood there staring at him with wide eyes, her breath coming in quick pants.
“Noah,” Carter said in a calm tone. When Bear didn’t even turn his eyes toward the stand-in Alpha, Carter took another step closer. “Bear. You can’t have her. You’ll hurt her. You could kill her. You could kill your mate.”
That stopped Bear. He studied Carter. And then a wave of possessiveness rolled over Noah. Bear thought Carter was trying to take Hollyn away from him, away from them. She’s our mate. She loves us, Noah tried to reassure Bear.
Bear took a step in Hollyn’s direction until Luke exploded from his skin and blocked his path. He knew his Clan would protect his mate. But now he feared his bear wouldn’t stop, he’d just tear through anyone who kept him away from Hollyn.
Colton glanced up at the house as Shawnee stepped out. He held out a hand, telling her to stay back. But Bear wasn’t interested in the redhead. Hollyn. Mate. Mine.
Luke swiped his massive claw at Bear when he continued his onward trajectory. Bear swung at Luke, challenging him. Noah watched in awe as the most unstable member of their Clan didn’t take the bait. He just kept his body between Hollyn and Bear.
“Should I Shift?” Shawnee called from her front porch.
That actually got Bear’s attention. He turned his massive head toward her, tilted his head and regarded her. Where Luke kept his cool, Colton, or rather his bear, took the attention as a threat. Colton’s bear exploded from his skin.
“For fuck’s sake,” Carter said, trying to calm the Clan down. “Bear, listen to me. Hollyn is safe. We won’t let her run off alone. We’ll protect her.”
Mine, Bear said. He wanted to be the one to protect her. But first, he needed to make sure she carried his mark. Needed to scar her with his teeth, his claws, he didn’t care. As long as her blood carried his scent.
You have to stop, Noah begged. He strained forward, trying to take the reins, trying to push through to take his body back. This is your Clan. They’re trying to protect Hollyn. They’re protecting our mate. You can’t mark her. You’ll hurt her.
Bear turned back to Hollyn. She’d moved to stand at the top of the stairs. And fear struck Noah hard when she slowly stepped down once, twice, until she was standing on the gravel that was their front yard.
She lifted her chin and closed her eyes. Like a floodgate blasting open, emotions crashed into him, crashed into Bear, making him stumble before righting himself. Her eyes opened and the sapphire was gone; they were as dark as her hair, that onyx color with swirling silver.
Bear released a whine as he watched his mate touch Luke on the shoulder as she passed. She wasn’t afraid. She wasn’t afraid of the Clan and she wasn’t afraid of Bear. Noah, on the other hand was terrified of what Bear would do.
He didn’t feel any fear from Hollyn. He felt love. Frustration. Anger. But no fear, not of Bear.
“You already have me, Bear,” Hollyn said as she moved closer.
Bear scented the air, raised his head and looked over his shoulder, as if telling her he didn’t want her to go.
Hollyn looked in the direction Bear had and slowly shook her head. “It’s safer if I go.” Her voice was so soft. She jutted her chin out and tried to look confident. But Noah felt her pain at leaving, felt the fear of being alone through their connection.
“We’ll keep you safe, Hollyn. I promise,” Carter said.
Bear growled at Carter but didn’t attack him. He took another step in Hollyn’s direction, his lips peeled back to bare his teeth.
“You can not bite me, Bear. I’m already yours. I carry your scent. But if you bite me, you could lose me. Do you understand that? Noah, I need you to push through. I need you to stop him.”
Bear cocked his head to the side.
“Tell him you’ll stay,” Shawnee called from her porch. She’d wisely stayed back. She knew her nearness could set Colton off and it would turn into a full-on brawl.
Hollyn glanced up at Shawnee but quickly turned her attention back to Bear. She couldn’t risk him taking advantage of her distraction. Smart.
Risking another step closer, Hollyn reached forward, laying her hand on Bear’s head when he ducked it to her level. She wasn’t a petite wom
an, but Bear towered over her and could easily hurt her if he wasn’t careful.
“You can’t mark me, Bear,” she reminded him as she stepped closer, raising her other hand to thread her fingers through his fur. “I love you, just as much as I love Noah. I’m already yours. I carry your scent, remember?” She inhaled deeply and smiled softly, just the slightest uptick of her lips. “I’ll stay.”
A deep rumble came from Bear’s chest, the closest thing to a purr he could make. Noah began to calm…until Bear raised his head and opened his mouth. Noah had a direct link to Bear’s thoughts. He knew he intended to lick her hand, to show affection, to nuzzle against her.
But his Clan didn’t.
Before he could do anything, a blur of fur rammed him from the side, knocking him away from Hollyn. She screamed, but Carter kept her back. Shawnee ran down the stairs, her wide eyes bouncing between Colton and Noah as Luke paced side to side, using his body as a wall to keep Bear away from Hollyn.
“Stop! He wasn’t going to hurt me,” Hollyn yelled to Colton.
“Sure as hell looked like he was going to bite you,” Carter said, his eyes on Noah while holding his arm out to keep Hollyn away. “What the fuck is going on with you Noah?”
“I don’t think Noah’s in there anymore,” Shawnee said from the sidelines. Her eyes glowed a bright gold of her lioness, but she hadn’t Shifted yet.
I don’t think Noah’s in there anymore.
Shit.
Fuck this. He needed his skin back. He’d never been one to lose control and he sure as fuck wasn’t going to start today. Hollyn needed him, needed him to be strong, needed him to be in control of himself and his bear.
Forcing the Shift, he groaned in agony as his bear tried to hold on, making the change back to his human form slow and painful. After what felt like a lifetime, he knelt on the ground, the gravel biting into his knees, and panted through the pain.
“He wasn’t going to bite her,” he said, his voice scratchy and gritty.
“Move,” Hollyn said, her voice strained as if she was pushing Carter aside. “I knew he wasn’t going to hurt me, dammit,” she said, running to his side. She moved to kneel beside him, but he stopped her.