Divine Hart

by Heather Shere

  All the kids are animated as we line up in the air-conditioned room. Time flies by as the music starts up for the procession into our seats. I just want this part over with so we can get on with the parties that are going on tonight. I hear Skye's infectious laughter and see her through the crowd laughing at Mark, our flamboyant classmate, who has a sly smirk on his face as he whispers into her ear. I'll admit I'm a bit jealous that he gets to be the one to laugh with her through this long ceremony.

  “I’m talking to you.” Craig waves a hand in front of my face. “Earth to Preston.”

  “Sorry, what did you say?”

  “Would you and Skye like to drive with Shaina and me to Lea’s party?”

  "I think Lea is going home with her parents and leaving Skye her car."

  “Cool cool… just let me know.”

  "Finally this damn line is moving."

  As we walk into the crowded convention center, the first faces I recognize in the back are Skye's parents, her mother a shell of a woman cowering next to her bald, overweight husband. Bob is a nasty piece of work, we've all heard the whispers about him around town. Rumors that his money is dirty, and his deals aren't always on the up and up. Now I have seen it for myself and I had a lucky escape. I just need to get us away from him so he can’t hurt us. I turn my head at the last second not wanting to make eye contact with him.

  Craig turns and elbows me. “There’s Shaina and your mom, up front with my parents.” He points to the first row where our families are parked.

  My mom spots us, and she practically bounces on her feet as she waves to us. My only goal in life is to be a man she can be proud of, she deserves that and I feel like today is a big step toward that.

  Finally, we get to our seats and go through the motions of the ceremony. I hope Lea doesn't quiz me on what her speech was about, since I only joined in the crowds clapping and of course, had to catcall her to make her turn a few shades of red. The evil look she threw Craig and I said we'll suffer for it later, but it's well worth it.

  The principal starts calling the names at last, and I’m glad that it's almost a done deal so I can take off this sweatbox red robe.

  "Skye Divine," the principal announces, and she walks across the stage and poses for a picture and smiles out to us. She doesn't mind the yelling Craig and I are doing, she just turns slightly red and regally walks off the stage.

  It seems like an hour goes by as they call name after name and finally our row is motioned to stand. We walk to the side of the stage and Craig's name is called. He struts out across the stage; that's when I notice the room has big screen TV's so parents and friends can actually see close ups of their loved one's faces. Craig's goofy ass grin flashes up.

  “Preston Hart.” At the sound of my name my feet move. I shake hands with the principal and see the camera off to the side. Looking directly into it, I mouth, “I love you, mama!” as I walk off stage.

  I hear a few ‘awwwws’ and I smile even broader.

  “What the hell, Preston? Showing us all up by mouthing to your mama.”

  "You're just mad you didn't think of it, Craig."

  “Damn straight I am. That’s some major brownie points right there.”

  We sit back down, and a cry goes up behind us. People are calling for paramedics. I try to see what is going on, but everyone is doing the same and I can’t get a look. Staff are moving toward the crowd and security is already on the scene trying to keep the crowd back some. Suddenly, I see a flash of Shaina’s red hair down on the floor.

  “Fuck, I think that’s Shaina.” Craig’s already pushing his way through the crowd.

  I have a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach as I follow him, pushing through the crowd to where Shaina is on the floor performing CPR. I turn cold and panic hits me. I begin shoving people out of my way. When I can't get through the aisle, I climb over the chairs. My foot slips through a chair, and I kick it to the side almost going down with it. I have to get to them; I can’t see who she’s working on, but I don’t see my mama. “Mama, where are you!?” I call out to her, hoping she hears me and comes to find me.

  A strong arm blocks my way, and I feel as though I've hit a brick wall.

  “Slow down, kid. You can’t come any further,” the convention center’s security guard says, holding me back with one arm.

  “My mom’s over there, I need to get to her.”

  “Let the paramedics take care of the emergency first, then I’ll let you though.”

  “Shaina!” I shout as they raise the gurney and she comes up with it, still performing CPR.

  She looks up, not missing a beat on her chest compressions. “Get to the hospital, I’m doing all I can,” she yells back and gives her patient her full attention.

  That’s when I go cold. There on the gurney, lifeless, is my mama.

  The hospital is like most buildings in Palm Springs, brown stucco that blends in with the browns of the desert. The only color is the blue of the sky and green of the palm leaves. Skye pulls Lea’s car around to the entrance. “Go, I’ll park the car.”

  I sprint into the building and immediately a security guard yells, "No running, kid!"

  I wave him off and slow to a brisk walk up to the counter where a lady greets me with a smile. “My mom was just brought in, Liliya Hart, can I see her?”

  “One moment while I check the patient list.” She starts shuffling papers around in no hurry, and I just want to grab her and shake her. It can't be that hard to find someone that just came in.

  "She came in an ambulance," I state with more calmness than I feel, hoping to speed her along.

  She pushes her glasses up and looks at me above the rims. "Car accident or convention center?" Not an ounce of compassion is on her face.

  “Is that how you have them filed away?” I can’t help the venom in my tone. “Convention center.”

  She shuffles for a minute more. “Are you related?”

  I have to resist the urge to stop her from touching things on her desk and scream in her face HELP ME! “Yes, I just told you. I’m her son,” I say between gritted teeth.

  “Can I see your ID?”

  Snatching the cap off my head and keeping my curse words to myself, I unzip my gown. Reaching into my back pocket, I find it empty, shit. “I forgot my wallet. I didn’t think I would need it today.”

  "I'm sorry, sir. Without ID we can't release any patient information," she states in that cold authoritative tone as if I were a child.

  I lean over the desk with my hands flat on the counter. “It’s my fucking mother! Where is she?” I growl into the woman’s face.

  She lifts a hand. “Security.”

  Great, just what I need. I look back to the weedy man coming out from the desk by the front door, the same one that told me not to run.

  “Alright, son, what’s the problem?” he asks, putting his hands on his hips about his belt, the look is almost comical.

  “My mom is back there.” I point at the double doors that lead to the treatment areas.

  He gives me an understanding look and looks at the lady behind the desk. “Car accident or convention center?”

  What the hell is wrong with these people? “Her name is Liliya Hart, and she was at my graduation.” I’m so fed up with how they are treating me I’m on the verge of breaking down and crying.

  He snaps a finger then points at me. “Gotcha, so what’s the issue?”

  “He doesn’t have his license, so we can’t confirm his identity.”

  I throw up my hands and turn away from the desk. It's rare that I lose my temper, but I am a word away from doing just that. Before I can go off, Skye walks in the door, scanning the room until her eyes stop on me. My rage quickly fades. I can concentrate on my mom with Skye near me. Taking long strides, I walk across the lobby, meeting her halfway.

  “How’s she doing?” she says with worry.

  “I have no clue, Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dumb won’t tell me a thing without my ID, which I've left at h
ome. We’re going to have to go get it before they let me see her." I can feel a lump starting to form in my throat at the thought of wasting another fifteen minutes before I find out anything.

  She frowns and tosses a nasty look at the lady behind the counter. “Oh yeah, your mom handed your wallet to me when she got in the car, so I threw it in my bag just in case.” She fishes through her big ole hobo bag and pulls out my wallet.

  “Oh, Skye, you’re a lifesaver!” I pull her to me and swiftly kiss her cheek, then put her hand in mine and walk with her back to the desk.

  I push my ID onto the counter. “Can you please let me know how my mother is doing?” I plead with the woman behind the counter.

  She takes my identification and taps something into the computer. “If you can have a seat I will have someone come out and talk to you.”

  “Is she ok?” I squeeze Skye’s hand, waiting.

  “I don’t have any medical information. I’ll get a nurse right out to talk to you,” she coldly states.

  I feel a tugging on my hand and look down into Skye’s eyes wondering if the desolation I feel is showing on my face.

  “Come on, let’s go wait.”

  I blindly follow her into a secluded corner and sit down. I brace my elbows on my knees and hold my head in my hands waiting for someone to come out to speak to us. Skye is rubbing my back trying to comfort me, no words are needed at a time like this. The wait is going to kill me.

  “Mr. Hart?”

  I jump to my feet and turn looking at Skye, motioning for her to come.

  She shakes her head. “I’m not family, I’ll just wait here for you.”

  I frown at her and lean down and grab her hand. “You’re our family, I need you.”

  “Okay.” She takes my hand and squeezes it while we both walk up to the nurse who is calling my name.

  “Mr. Hart?” she directs the question at me this time.

  “Yes, can I see my mother?”

  “I’m Angel, let’s go to a private room so we can talk.” She proceeds to direct us into a room right behind the emergency doors.

  I squeeze Skye's hand, then quickly soften my grip so I don't hurt her. She squeezes mine back in return and rubs my upper arm.

  “Is she okay? Can I see her?” I ask as I pass her going in the room. She doesn’t answer me, she just pauses and closes the door.

  “Not just yet. Right now we are trying to stabilize her.”

  “What does that mean? I can’t lose her.” I choke back the boulder that’s in my throat.

  "We are doing our best. Your mother had a heart attack. We're trying to get her stabilized to get the specialist in to evaluate her."

  “Is she awake?” Skye rests her hand on mine.

  “No, she isn’t awake. Let me be perfectly clear, Mr. Hart. She has almost slipped away twice. The specialist is on his way to do more testing, they may have to operate. It’s touch and go right now, but please know we are doing everything we can to give your mother the best care possible.” She at least has empathy in her voice as she’s explaining this to us.

  “Slipped away?” I manage to choke out.

  “Yes, your friend performed CPR successfully on the scene to reestablish a heart rhythm, but again in the ambulance, paramedics had to resuscitate her. Your mother’s condition is critical, but she is in good hands, Mr. Hart.”

  “Okay, will I be able to see her soon?” I feel like I’m a broken record, I just keep repeating myself.

  “We’ll let you know when we can get her stabilized, then we can let you have a brief visit with her.”

  I nod my head and squeeze Skye’s hand again. This is a nightmare that I want to wake from.

  "What we need to do right now is have you fill out a health history for her, and also provide us with copies of her insurance card if you have it with you. I'll send in our administrative assistant to help you fill it out. She can also answer any questions you might have about your mother’s care.”

  “Okay,” I murmur. She leaves Skye and myself in this stark, cold room with only a few chairs around a table and nothing else but the white walls. I choke up. "They had to revive her twice, Skye." I turn slightly to face her, not trying to hide the tears I feel filling my eyes.

  “Oh, Preston. I’m so sorry. I don’t know what to say.” She cradles my face and then throws her arms around my neck.

  “Just hold me.” I’m not ashamed, I need her. I lean my forehead against her shoulder and cry. Something I have not done since my father passed.

  I’m not sure how long we’ve been sitting like this when there is a soft knock on the door. I pull away and see a wet spot on Skye’s shirt. “Sorry,” I murmur.

  “Don’t be.” She uses her thumb to wipe the wetness from my cheeks.

  "Come in," I call out.

  An older lady with a hospital uniform comes in. “Mr. Hart?”

  “Yes, that’s me.” I turn to face her as she sits down at the table and sets her paperwork down.

  “My name is Jasmine, I’m here to help you fill out the admitting paperwork for your mom. Do you know her medical history?”

  “Uhhh, she’s had no issues that I know of.” I look over to Skye since her and mom spend a lot of time together. "Did she ever mention anything to you?"

  “No, the only thing she would mention is being healthy as a horse.”

  “That’s ok, do you have a copy of her insurance card?”

  “We don’t have health insurance.” I feel doom in the pit of my stomach.

  “Do you know if she qualifies for Medicare?” Jasmine sits very still with her pen ready to write down my answer.

  "I don't, we never looked into it. Is my Mom even old enough for that?"

  She looks down at her paperwork. "Oh I see, no, she won't qualify for Medicare because of her age." She pauses to collect herself and offers an apologetic smile. "In that case, Mr. Hart, we will get her stabilized here but once she is stable, we will have to transfer her to the county hospital."

  “County? But won’t her doctors be here?” I run my hands through my hair nervously.

  “She will get all new doctors and possibly free care at County,” she says reassuringly, but I know she is placating me.

  “Will they have specialists there?” I’m confused about how healthcare works and why she has to move, but I know it’s all to do with money…money we don’t have.

  “I’m not sure who the other hospital has on staff, but they will take good care of her. I can get you in touch with a patient care advocate. They will be able to talk you through everything.” She starts scooping up her paperwork.

  “Is there anything we can do to keep her here?” I don't want her to go there, that's where we lost my Dad.

  "You can pay cash, up front. Is that a possibility?

  “No.” I sigh.

  “Ok, once they have her stabilized we will let you know about moving her.”

  She picks up her stuff and walks out of the room. That’s it. No insurance, no help.

  As soon as the door shuts, I turn to my side and look at Skye. “She’s going to die if they move her. I don’t know what to do.”

  “Stay positive, we’ll figure something out. I’ll be right back. I’m going to let the gang know what’s going on.”

  I nod my head and hide my face in my hands. I hate feeling this helpless. Fuck she had a heart attack.

  Two

  As I leave the room, I hear the lady that was helping with paperwork at the counter talking in hushed tones. I pause for a moment to eavesdrop on the conversation.

  “Angel, I wish there was something we could do. We both know if they move her she is as good as dead.” Jasmine rubs her temples and has a weary expression on her face.

  “Well they can’t pay for her care and don’t have insurance, so there is no way we can treat her here.”

  They both stop talking when they see me standing off to the side. Looking at both of them, I see looks of sympathy and pity shining in their eyes. I nod to them
and walk into the waiting room, searching in my purse for my cell phone, hoping it still has a charge.

  Perfect, forty percent.

  The phone rings, once, twice…

  “Skye?” Lea’s voice is high-pitched.

  “Hey.” I’m suddenly choked up, I can be real and weak with Lea.

  “What’s wrong with Liliya?”

  “She had a heart attack. They’ve had to bring her back twice. But Lea, they don’t have insurance.”

  “Fuck.”

  “Yeah, they’re now talking about stabilizing her and sending her to County Hospital.” We both know how bad County can be. Lea lost a cousin years ago at that hospital, they gave her someone else’s medication. I know that can happen anywhere, but between Preston’s father and Lea’s cousin, it’s left a bad taste in all of our mouths.

  “I hate to mention this, Skye, but…would your parents help?”

  “I can’t ask, Lea. My father would love that way too much.”

  “Some things are worth it, Skye, just saying.” Her voice tried to soften the blow she just dealt me.

  “I gotta go.” I don’t even wait for her to say goodbye. I just end the call.

  I stare out into the room, leaning back against the furthest wall from everyone and see nothing but sickness and sadness. I slowly crouch into a sitting position and hug my knees, thinking. I know we have the money to help Liliya, and she and Preston mean the world to me, but I know what it will cost me to ask. What I wouldn’t give for a loving parent like Preston’s mom.

  A baby crying brings me out of my thoughts. I can’t sit out here all day wallowing in self-pity. Lea is right; some things are worth a little self-sacrifice. Before I lose my nerve I do something I never thought I would do, I call a number I’ve never dialed before.

  “Skye?”

  He answered faster than I expected, in fact I didn’t think he would answer at all, so now it feels as if my mouth is filled with cotton balls. I can’t seem to say anything.

  “Skye is that you? Is everything alright?” For a second it actually sounds like he cares. It makes me wonder if I misdialed.

  I swallow hard and steel my nerves. “Dad?”