“Hutch.” Jillian gripped my arm. “I wasn’t expecting you to have sex with me,” she whispered as she used her other hand to touch my chin. “You’re not ready for that, honey.” She ran her thumb over my bottom lip. “Sit with me.” She eased me onto the mattress and sat down next to me.
“I want to tell you something.” I reached for Jillian’s hand as I turned to look at her. “Something I’ve only told one other person. The reason I’m the way that I am.”
“Hutch, honey, you don’t have to do that.”
“I want to.”
We sat in the dark for what felt like forever as Jillian waited for me to speak. She didn’t push me or ask me what it was. She only waited until I was ready.
“Eight years ago, I had everything going for me.” My voice shook with anxiety as I spoke. “You might not remember that since you were so young at the time, but I was pretty popular. On the football team, with plans to go pro when I graduated, and of course, seeing the world someday.” I stopped to catch my breath. My heart was thumping so loudly in my chest that I felt like it might explode. “The year before my junior year of high school, my father signed me up for football camp. Thought it would be good for me. I thought it sounded like a load of shit because I was already a great player, but hell, why not, right? It would get me out of here for the summer.” I needed to get up, move, do anything, as my breathing got difficult.
Jillian watched me as I paced around the apartment. Her eyes were wide when I turned to look at her. She looked so small sitting on my bed with the shirt sliding off her shoulder. She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear as she waited for me to continue. I moved to grab a beer, because I needed to take the edge off, and ended up finishing the entire thing in one gulp.
I made my way to the couch before I spoke again. “It was fun,” I told her, which wasn’t a lie. “At first. The first week, the second week, but by the third...” I swallowed as bile filled my throat and my beer threatened to come back up. “I wanted to go home.” I couldn’t look at Jillian now as she stood up to come closer to me. Not when my secret was about to come out. I yanked at my hair and pulled the strands out. Jillian pressed her small frame against my body then while wrapping her arms around my waist. I didn’t touch her, afraid of breaking her in half.
“I was in the shower when they came for me. I tried to fight them.” I felt my knees give out, and Jillian came crashing to the floor with me. “It was no use of course. They were bigger, there were more of them, and I was tied up. I couldn’t see who it was. But I still fought them until I felt the gun on my back.” Tears blinded my eyes as I pressed my face into the fabric of the couch. “I was so sore from the workout I had that day that I didn’t even have the strength, and I think that was the reason they came for me that day. They took turns on me, all six of them, and when they were done”—I was so ashamed as I spoke the words out loud—“they left me there alone in the dark to stumble back to my cabin. Bleeding and bruised, not caring if I lived or died.” I took a shaky breath as the memories came flooding back. “I have no idea if I’m the only person that this happened to because I never spoke to anyone about it. I was so embarrassed.” I kept my eyes down, afraid to look at Jillian, not wanting to see the horrified look in her eyes and have her push me away. “I called my parents the next day so that I could beg them to come home. I told them I just wasn’t having fun, even though just a few days earlier I had hold them the complete opposite,” I whispered.
I felt Jillian’s body moved behind me. “Hutch,” she murmured my name. “Honey, please look at me.” She tugged on me to try to get me to turn around.
“I can’t.”
“Please, Hutch.”
I slowly moved my body around to face hers but kept my gaze down. Jillian cupped my cheeks in her hands to tilt my face up. Her greens were pinched, her eyes full of love, and as she leaned forward, I felt my breath catch in my throat. “None of that was your fault, baby,” she whispered, brushing her lips against mine. “I know I can’t tell you how to feel or how to act because I’ve never had anything like that happen to me.” Again, her lips were a soft caress on mine. “But I can tell you that you didn’t deserve that.” She moved to straddle my waist then, and pressed forward, running her tongue over the seam of my lips. “You were a young boy. Those people were supposed to protect you, not hurt you, and they were monsters.” She pulled on my bottom lip with her teeth. “I’m so sorry that happened to you.”
I planted my palm against the back of Jillian’s head so that I could hold it in place before I kissed her. My tongue slipped easily between her lips, and her arms tightened around my neck as our kiss grew rougher, harder, and I realized where this was going. She was already grinding against me in a way that told me she wanted me, but was I ready to take that step tonight?
Jillian pulled back to yank the shirt she had on up over her head. “Touch me,” she begged earnestly. “Please, Hutch, I need you.” She arched her back and pressed her chest forward.
I groaned at the sight of her hard, dusky nipples before I took one in my mouth. Jillian cried out as I sucked and nibbled softly on it, her body squirming against me. I reached up to roll the right one, the one that wasn’t in my mouth, between my fingers, and I swear she was going to come right then.
“More, please, more,” she urged. “Suck harder.” I was glad Jillian wasn’t afraid to tell me what to do. Her hands found my hair so that she could thread her fingers through it, and when I did as she asked, I watched her eyes roll back slightly. “Mark me. Please,” she moaned.
I did as Jillian asked—biting, sucking, and pinching her hard enough to leave little pink marks against her skin until I thought I would explode in my pants. There were so many things I wanted to do with her, but most of all? I wanted her to ride my cock until I came inside her tight little pussy.
“Hutch,” she moaned my name like a fucking porn star.
I popped my mouth from her nipple. “Yes?” I wanted her. I wanted her more than I had ever wanted anything in my life.
Jillian smiled at me before she touched my cheek. “I want to be the first girl to put her mouth on you, Hutch.” She ran her thumb over my cheek, over my bottom lip, and then pressed her mouth against mine. “Will you let me do that?” she asked softly.
Chapter Ten
Hutch
I stared into Jillian’s green eyes as her words echoed through my brain. What kind of a man would say no to that? “Yes.” I swallowed hard, nodding. “I would...yes.”
“Do you want one now?” Jillian asked, licking her lips. “Because now would be good.” She grinned.
Fuck, yes. “Now.” I nodded again. “What do I need to do?” I asked.
“Just take off your pants, baby, and I’ll do the rest.”
Baby. That was a new nickname she had just started using on me, but I liked it. I liked it a whole fucking lot.
Jillian stood up so I could lift my hips and slide off my jeans, which I placed on the floor next to me. Then for the heck of it, I tugged my shirt off too, which I tossed right onto my pants. Then I looked up at Jillian, who was watching me, and had to hold back the moan that threatened to escape. She was a goddess.
“So I’m going to just sort of touch you first,” she told me as she climbed to her knees. “Stroke you a little, play with your balls.” Jillian glanced up at me before she stopped to remove the elastic on her wrist and tied her hair back up. “Tell me if you don’t like anything I’m doing or if it feels weird or whatever. Okay?” She leaned forward to plant a kiss against my lips. “Or if you just want me to stop. I don’t ever want to do something you aren’t comfortable with. All I want is for you to feel good.”
“Okay.”
Jillian wrapped her hand around my shaft, and I groaned. Her hand was warm as she slowly stroked my dick. Up, down, up, down, I watched as she swiped her thumb over the drop of pre-cum that had leaked out, using it as lube as she continued to work me over. It felt good when I did it, but it felt fantastic with Jillian stroking my
dick. She gripped me a little harder, moved her hand a litter faster, and then dropped her head down to swipe her tongue against my head.
“Holy fuck,” I blustered out. That was something I couldn’t do myself. Jillian’s tongue was wet, warm, and perfect as she licked over the head again before she ran it down the length of my dick. “Jesus Christ,” I grunted. My hand went to her hair, and she moaned softly. It wasn’t until Jillian lifted her head and sucked my entire cock into her mouth that I realized what I had been missing.
I threw my head back as she took me all the way down to the balls, and I couldn’t help but want to thrust my hips up into her mouth, but resisted the urge. Jillian’s hand wrapped around my balls, rolling and squeezing, as she sucked my dick, never taking her eyes off me. I felt her tongue flatten against my shaft, and it didn’t take long before I felt the need to explode build up inside me.
Jillian didn’t stop when I tried to pull her off me. She kept going, taking it all when I cried out, and I watched as she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand before she sat back on her ankles while heat flashed in her eyes. “Did you enjoy that?” she asked shyly.
“It was amazing.” I kissed her lips softly. I didn’t care if she had my cum all over her mouth. My desire for Jillian Robinson was out of control.
“Your turn, Jills,” I murmured, wrapping my arms around her waist and lifting her up off the floor. Her legs instantly wrapped around my waist as I walked her over to the bed to place her onto the mattress. “You”—I began to kiss my way down her soft skin—“are”—then ran my tongue over her erect nipples—“the most”—finally clasping Jillian’s hips, leaving little wet marks as I slithered down her body—“beautiful woman in the entire world.” I stopped to glance up and the look on her face caused my breath to catch in my throat.
Her green eyes were glazed over, her hair spilling out of the makeshift ponytail she had piled it into, and her cheeks pink with excitement. My heart thudded loudly against my chest as I took a moment to realize what was happening. This was more than just a summer fling for me. This was—
“Hutch.” Jillian’s raspy voice brought my attention back to her. “Are you alright?” She reached out to run her hands through my damp hair. “Do you want to stop?”
“Fuck no,” I growled, pushing her thighs apart. I used my fingers to spread her wide and felt my cock spring to attention again. I leaned down to slowly run my tongue over her clit, and the sound Jillian made caused me to groan softly.
I would never tire of this.
Jillian’s hands funneled into my hair, pulling and tugging as I teased her, my tongue rolling and licking between her folds. She told me what she wanted, begged me for more, and arched into me as I drew her closer to her climax.
“Fuck, I’m so close,” Jillian groaned. “You promised fingers, Hutch. Please fuck me with your fingers like I know you can.” She pulled on my hair. “Two, use two,” she whispered when I met her heated gaze. I had watched plenty of porn in my lifetime to know the female anatomy. I dropped my hand and slowly slipped my index finger inside. Jillian clenched and pulsed around me. Jesus, that was hot. “More, baby. One more.” She released my hair from her grip to attack her nipples. “Fuck, that feels so good.”
I groaned as I did as she asked, and when my middle finger slid inside, Jillian cried out with pleasure, her head falling back against the pillow. Fuck, I was going to come again just watching her. I began to fire off short licks against her clit as I moved my fingers in and out.
Jillian screamed out her release, her muscles clenching and her body convulsing as she flooded my mouth before she finally relaxed and stopped to catch her breath. “Hutch,” she whispered my name.
I felt my ears burn pink. I don’t know why all of a sudden I was embarrassed. I started to get up, but felt her hand on my elbow. “I just...I need to wash up,” I assured her before I walked to the bathroom. I turned on the faucet, washed my hands, my cock, and then my face before I tossed the cloth into the hamper. I didn’t expect to find Jillian standing behind me with her arms crossed over her chest. “It’s an OCD thing, Jills, not you. Please don’t make this any weirder for me.” I dropped my gaze to my feet.
“Should I do the same?”
“No.”
“Are you okay?” She tilted her head to make me look at her.
I nodded.
“Do you want to talk about anything?” Jillian dropped her arms before she took a step closer. “Did you like my mouth on your dick?” My cock stirred at the memory. “Or your fingers in my—”
I clamped my hand over her mouth. “Yes, but if you say it out loud, I’m going to have to do it again.” I chuckled, pulling Jillian against me. “Promise me something.” I sighed softly as her arms snaked around my waist.
“I promise that I won’t tell anyone.”
My heart swelled in my chest. I was fucked with a capital F. “Jillian.” My voice didn’t sound anything like mine, and I couldn’t find it in me to form any coherent sentence as she pulled back to look up at me.
She ducked her head slightly. “We should probably go to sleep. It’s late.” She started to walk back to the bed, but turned to move toward the living room where she grabbed the shirt she was wearing when I came home, and slipped it back on over her head. “Come on, baby.” Jillian flashed a quick smile before she moved to stand by the bed. She remembered that I liked to be on the inside by the wall, and this time, my throat felt like it was closing up.
I stopped to pull a pair of clean boxers out of my dresser to wear to sleep before I climbed into the bed where Jillian joined me and snuggled up into my side. She always smelled so good, no matter what. Sometimes it was flowery, but tonight, it reminded me of peppermint. I felt her fingers start to draw circles on my stomach, and I couldn’t help but hold her even tighter. Jillian wouldn’t be here much longer, so I wanted to enjoy this moment as long as I could.
I stared up at the moon, wondering if things would ever feel as perfect as they did right now.
***
The rest of the week seemed to fly by in the blink of an eye with Jillian and I spending all of our free time together. Tuesday night, she came over after practice, showered, and then gave me another blowjob in the kitchen before I even had the chance to cook dinner. Of course, I had to return the favor by throwing her onto the table, and making her come not once, but twice, before we decided to order takeout instead.
Wednesday, I had therapy. I found Jillian waiting for me in a lace bra and underwear when I got home. Thursday was more of the same. Oral sex was amazing, but what I enjoyed more than that was having Jillian sleeping next to me at night. Her warm, soft body pressed to mine as she slept was probably my favorite part of our relationship. Friday morning, we were getting dressed when Jillian told me her sister had texted her.
“You want to go on a double date?” She hooked her bra behind her back and then pulled the straps up before she glanced up at me. “With your brother and Jo?” She chewed nervously on her bottom lip. “It’s weird, right? You don’t want to do it?” Jillian turned back around to yank her tights up over her waist.
“Okay.”
She spun back around. “Is that okay yes, or okay it’s weird?” Her eyes were lit up like starlight.
“Both,” I admitted before she threw herself into my arms. “I just want to make you happy, Jills, that’s the only thing that matters.” I chuckled as she jumped up and down.
Jillian clapped her hands together. “Honestly, Hutch.” She spun around on her toes before she jumped up in the air. Fuck, my girl was so graceful. Shit, my girl. Was Jillian actually my girl? Could I call her that?
“You make me happy,” she blurted out before she spun around with wide eyes. “No, you do. You make me so damn happy I want everyone to know.” Jillian grabbed her leotard from her bag to quickly put it on before she dashed across the room, yanked open the door, and was out onto the steps. “Hutch Kelly makes me happy!” she shouted. “Do you hear that, Ocean View?” Sh
e giggled hysterically before she sprinted back into the apartment. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”
Because I love you. The thought flashed through my mind so fast I stumbled. “Because you make me happy too.” I managed to answer her just before she jumped up into my arms. I caught her and laughed loud and hard for the first time in so long I couldn’t even remember. “You make me so happy, Jillybean, and I feel alive when we’re together.” Like I used to, but I left that part out.
A wide smile spread across Jillian’s face. “Hutch.”
“Jesus Christ, what’s all that shouting about?” Pat muttered as he whipped my screen door open. “Shit, am I interrupting?” He noticed the way I was holding Jillian in my arms. “Was that you screaming like a lunatic out there, Jill?” She scrambled out of my arms before I could stop her.
“I should go before I’m late.” She shoved her dirty clothes into her gym bag before she hooked it over her shoulder. “Hutch, I’ll text you after I hear back from Jo.” She was red as a tomato right then.
“Jills.” I tried to stop her so I could give her a goodbye kiss, but she ducked under my arm. She wiggled her fingers at me before she nudged past Patrick and disappeared out the door. “That’s fucking great.” I sighed as I glared at my brother, who looked clueless.
Pat’s brows dipped. “What?” He popped his jaw.
I rolled my eyes. “Nothing, dude, I’m going to be late.”
“Are you two, you know, doing it now?” Pat followed behind me as I locked the door and hurried down the steps.
“Piss off.” I scoffed.
“Holy shit,” Pat hissed. “You’re fucking her.”
I spun around once I hit the grass. “I didn’t say that.” I pointed a finger at my little brother. “Don’t talk about Jillian like that either, man, she’s not like other girls.”
Pat smirked at me. “She sucked your dick though, right? If you’re not having sex with her—”
My fist made contact with his stomach before I could stop to think it was wrong and my brother doubled over in pain. “Don’t talk about Jillian like that, I fucking warned you.” I grabbed the back of Pat’s shirt to force him to stand up. “She’s different from the other girls.” His eyes were wide as I stared down at him. “I love her. Got it?” It was the first time I had admitted it aloud, but now that I had? It was easier to believe it.
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