Abi: I think it's the kind of talk that should happen in person. So, tomorrow night?
Greta: Yes, that's fine. She figured she might as well get it over with.
Abi: Ok. I'll see you tomorrow. x
Greta couldn't relax in her bath, or in bed afterwards. All she could think about was the talk she had to have with Abi, which she was dreading. If she were anyone other than herself, she would try to play the attempted kiss off as some impulse that meant nothing, but she couldn't do that. The whole truth would come tumbling out: that she had been in love with Abi for some time, that she didn't believe she would ever not be in love with her, that she was giving up on all other romantic prospects. How could their friendship possibly continue as usual once the truth was out?
After her third sleepless night in a row, Greta got dressed and began gathering her things to go back home.
It was in the cab, on the way to the airport, that she got one more text from Abi:
I can't wait to see you.
Greta's heart sped up. Abi couldn't wait to see her? She wouldn't say that if she were feeling awkward about their almost-kiss, would she?
I can't wait to see you either, Greta replied. I've missed you.
Abi: Just a few more hours and we'll be together.
Greta's heart was pounding now. Did she mean it? Would they be together, in every sense of the word?
Suddenly she found she wasn't dreading going home after all. She was very much looking forward to it.
***
The plane seemed to take forever to start boarding. When Greta finally got onto the plane and headed for her seat, she found a middle-aged man in an Armani suit already settling in.
“Excuse me,” she said after double-checking her seat number. “I'm supposed to be in this seat.”
“That's nice, but so am I,” he said, sounding bored.
“Could you check your ticket again?”
“Lady, this is my seat.” He finally looked up and gave her the once-over. A smile curled his lips. “But you can sit on my lap if you want.”
Greta backed up and looked for a flight attendant. “Excuse me,” she said. “I think there's been a mix-up.”
The attendant checked her ticket. She checked the man's ticket. Then she said she had to go talk to someone. Greta quickly felt her good mood disappearing. What if the flight had been overbooked and she couldn't make it home to Abi today? Abi was waiting for her, she said she couldn't wait to see her, and that might mean – though Greta barely dared to hope – that that kiss was finally going to happen after all.
Finally, the flight attendant came back. “I'm so sorry,” she said. “There's been a mistake. This seat is double-booked. We do have an open seat back in coach if you would be willing to sit back there. We can refund the cost of your ticket.”
Greta had never flown coach before, but at this point, she'd practically be willing to sit on the wing if it got her back to Abi faster. “Of course,” she said.
“Hey, I’m sorry,” said the man in her seat. “I was kidding about the lap thing. I’m actually a gentleman.” He stood up. “You can have my seat. I’ll go to coach.”
“Oh, no, I couldn’t. You were here first,” said Greta.
“No, no, I insist. I don’t want a lady sitting in an uncomfortable seat on my account.”
It was tempting. It really was. But from the way he was looking at her, Greta knew this was probably an attempt to get to know her better. He would expect her to be friendly towards him if he gave up his seat for her, and then he would likely offer to take her for a drink when they landed in New York, and quite frankly, she wasn’t interested.
“No thank you,” she said firmly. She turned to the flight attendant. “I’ll take the seat in coach.”
It was a bulkhead seat, which meant it was even less roomy than the other seats in coach, but at least it was by the window. Greta put her bag in the overhead bin and settled herself in, taking out her phone. There were no further messages from Abi, which she supposed was because most of what they had to say to each other needed to wait until tonight. She went ahead and switched airplane mode on.
The other coach passengers began filing in. They were a bit different from the people she usually saw in first class. There were not as many men in suits, and the few suits she did see were not designer. There were a few families with chattering children. One couple with a baby sat in the bulkhead seats on the other side of the plane, bouncing the baby in the air to keep her giggling while they waited for takeoff. A grandmotherly woman slipped sticks of gum to the children in front of her, who took them with big grins. Greta began to feel out of place. She was the only person in sight wearing a Stella McCartney sweater and carrying a Burberry coat. Abi would fit in here, though, and she fit with Abi. She tried to relax.
A girl of about fourteen sat down next to Greta, looking both nervous and excited.
“Hello,” Greta said with a friendly smile.
“Hi,” said the girl. “Where are you headed to?”
“New York, it’s where I live.”
“Oh yeah.” The girl’s face turned red. “Stupid question. This isn’t a bus. We’re all going to New York!”
“It’s not a stupid question at all,” Greta assured her. “We’re all going to New York, but some people are going there to change planes.”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” said the girl. “It’s my first time on a plane. And my first time going to New York.”
“And you’re traveling alone?”
She nodded. “My parents divorced when I was little, but my dad stayed in California until a few months ago, when he got a job offer in New York. I’m going to see him for the first time since he moved.”
“Oh, well you’ll love New York. It has a lot of history, and there’s a lot to do!”
The girl smiled. “I was hoping for a window seat. I’ve always wanted to fly on a plane, to look at the clouds and the tiny buildings, but they didn’t give me a window seat.”
Greta looked out the window and smiled. “I’ve flown countless times. You can have my seat.”
“Really?”
“Yes, of course. I just want to get home.” She stood up, and the girl eagerly moved into the window seat. She took out her phone and snapped a picture of the runway, then another picture of the wing.
“Thank you so much!” she said.
“You’re welcome,” Greta said. “I’m Greta, by the way.”
“I’m Lauren.”
“You might want to switch your phone to airplane mode soon, Lauren,” Greta told her.
“Oh, right. Will it make the plane crash if I don’t?”
Greta chuckled. “No. But the cell signals could interfere with the radios, and we don’t want that.”
“Oh, okay.” Lauren searched her phone for airplane mode.
“What grade are you in?” Greta asked her.
“I’m a freshman in high school.”
“Aren’t the schools back from break yet?”
“Well the public schools will be on Monday, but I go to private school, and we still have one more week off.” She smiled shyly. “It’s a special performing arts school. I got a scholarship after I auditioned. Everyone says I have a great voice.”
“So you like to sing?”
“Oh, I love to sing! I’d love to perform on Broadway someday. My dad is taking me to a show while I visit, which I’m sooo excited about. My mom has spent so much money on voice lessons for me. I guess that’s why we never have the money to go on vacation.” She looked down, fidgeting. “This feels like my first vacation, even though it’s technically not a vacation if you’re visiting family.”
“It can be both,” Greta assured her.
“Right before break, we did auditions for the spring musical at school. It’s The Sound of Music, and guess what part I got!”
“Which one?”
“Liesl! I’m Liesl! I’d rather be Maria, of course, but naturally a senior got that role. But I’m go
ing to love being Liesl! I’m already practicing my songs.”
“Oh, that’s wonderful! I do love theatre,” Greta admitted. “I actually performed on Broadway for several years myself.”
Lauren gasped. “You did? I’m sitting next to an actual Broadway star?”
Greta chuckled. “Former Broadway star. And actually, I almost always had supporting roles. I never really liked to be the center of attention.”
“So why did you stop?”
“I decided I was ready to do something a little quieter.” She thought for a moment. “I still know a lot of people on Broadway, though. If you give me your number, I could get you tickets to any show you like, and have someone take you backstage.”
Lauren’s eyes grew enormous. “That would be amazing! I’ve always wondered what it’s like backstage on Broadway!”
“It’s a lot like your high school musical productions,” Greta said thoughtfully. “Only bigger.”
Lauren giggled.
Soon they were preparing to take off, and Lauren was excitedly snapping pictures out the window. Once the plane got into the air, she put in her earbuds and began listening to something (Greta could see from the phone’s screen that it was the soundtrack to The Sound of Music). Greta, on the other hand, was really feeling the effects of barely sleeping the past few nights. Now that she was feeling confident that everything would be okay with Abi, she thought she just might be able to take a little nap. Maybe even a long nap. Not only would it give her some energy for what lay ahead, but it would make the time pass faster.
She asked a passing flight attendant if she could get a pillow and blanket. Seeming eager to please the first-class transplant, the attendant brought her the items she requested and said she was waiving the fee. Greta reclined her seat, got as comfortable as she possibly could considering how narrow the seat was, and dozed off.
Her last thought was that she hoped to be almost home with Abi when she awoke.
***
Greta woke from her nap when the plane jolted. She looked around to see everyone else looking startled as well. She could feel a vibration all around them.
Lauren pulled her earbuds out. “Is this normal?” she asked in alarm.
“No,” Greta admitted. “I’ve never experienced anything like this.”
She looked around for a flight attendant, but saw no one.
“What do we do?” asked Lauren.
“Just buckle your seatbelt and wait for them to tell us what’s going on.”
Greta looked at her watch. They had been in the air for close to three hours. She could feel the plane listing to one side, but then it righted itself. The vibrations continued, however.
“We’re leaking fuel!” shouted a man a few rows back. “I can see it!”
Gaping, Lauren looked out of the window. “Oh no,” she said. “We’re going to crash.”
“Not necessarily,” Greta assured her.
Finally a voice came on over the intercom. “Ladies and gentlemen, we are sorry for the inconvenience, but we are being diverted to Peoria, Illinois. Please secure all luggage in the overhead compartment and fasten your safety belts in preparation for landing. Now would be a good time to review safety procedures.”
There was a lot of murmuring all around them, and some people looked scared while others seemed relieved by the announcement. Greta dug out the card with safety procedures listed on it, which showed the brace positions and how to safely evacuate a plane, and handed it to Lauren.
“Why would we be going to Peoria?” Lauren asked.
“There must have been a malfunction,” Greta told her, struggling to keep her voice steady. “They’re having to make an emergency landing.”
“I don’t know anybody in Illinois. What will we do when we get there?”
“Hopefully, the plane will land without any further difficulty, and they will find new flights to put us on. If we have to stay overnight, the airline will pay for our hotel rooms.”
Lauren nodded uncertainly. “I haven’t seen my dad since last summer. I really miss him. It sucks that I only get a week with him. I don’t want to miss another day.”
“I know. I’m in a hurry to get home as well. But getting there safely is more important than getting there quickly.”
“Yes, I suppose so.”
Greta looked up when she saw the flight attendant who had brought her pillow and blanket going down the aisle. She noticed that she was walking with her head down, looking at no one.
That was when Greta knew the plane was going to crash.
Looking around, she noticed that Lauren’s shoes were off and that she had been using her coat as a pillow.
“Lauren,” she said quickly, “put your shoes back on.”
“My shoes?”
“Yes, and your coat too.”
“Why?”
“Sometimes emergency landings don’t go very smoothly. You don’t want your shoes bumping around the cabin if the landing is a bit rough, and we may be asked to leave the plane quickly. Your coat will provide you with more protection.”
“Oh. Okay.”
Greta put her own coat on, then pulled her purse from under her seat. She had to think quickly. If she was unconscious, how would they identify her? She wasn’t even in the right seat. She took her driver’s license from her wallet and put it in her pocket. Then she took out a pen and wrote Abi’s name and phone number on her hand, along with the words “power of attorney.”
“It feels like we’re landing now,” said Lauren. “But I don’t see the airport.”
She was right. The plane was quickly losing altitude. Flight attendants were going up and down the aisles, making sure everyone was buckled in and had all their things secured. Greta took out her phone and turned airplane mode off.
“What are you doing?” Lauren asked her in alarm.
“It’s only for a second,” said Greta. “Lauren, this plane is crashing, and we don’t know how bad it will be. If there’s anything you need to quickly say to anyone, now is the time.”
What could she possibly say to Abi? She had a thousand things to say to her. She couldn’t condense well over a year of longing into one simple text.
There was nothing to do but take the simplest, most direct approach. I love you, she typed. As soon as the message sent, she put her phone back on airplane mode and tucked it into her pocket.
“I’m just going to tell my parents that I love them,” Lauren said, her voice trembling. Greta watched her typing with shaky fingers.
“Not a good experience for your first flight, is it?” Greta said with a sad smile. “The good news is, we’re close to the exits. As soon as the plane lands, we’ll get off as quickly as we can. Hopefully the landing won’t be too bad.”
Lauren swallowed and tried to put on a brave smile. “Will we get to go down that big slide? Like on TV?”
“Most likely, yes.”
“And then they’ll find us new flights?”
“If we’re not hurt.”
“What if we are hurt?”
“Then we’ll go to the nearest hospital, and our loved ones will have to come to us.”
Lauren looked out of the window. “We’re getting closer to the ground and I still don’t see the airport.”
Suddenly a voice came back on the intercom. “Brace for impact!” it shouted. “Brace! Brace!”
The flight attendants immediately began chanting, “Brace for impact! Heads down! Stay Down!” over and over. It sounded eerie, almost cultish.
There were sounds of panic all around them. Greta passed her blanket to Lauren. “Put your head between your knees and put this over your head.” Lauren did, and Greta did the same thing, holding her pillow over her head.
All she could do now was wait for impact.
10
Impact
Abi walked into the Mermaid, still feeling a little dazed. She had been dazed since the night before, when Greta had tried to kiss her.
She knew she hadn’t react
ed well. The most sensible way to react would have been to let Greta kiss her, but it had come so completely out of nowhere that she had reacted without thinking. Sure, she wanted to kiss Greta, but she had wanted to kiss her since the first time she saw her, and she had been telling herself this whole time that she couldn’t do it. So last night, when the opportunity presented itself without warning, she had just reflexively turned away.
She also knew Greta had left thinking her overtures were unwanted, and Abi hated that, but there hadn’t been enough time to fix it before Greta had to leave. They clearly needed to have a serious chat, and something like this couldn’t be rushed. Abi needed time to think, and then they needed time to sit down and really work this out, decide what to do next. Because if Abi had understood her correctly, what Greta was saying was that she loved Abi, really loved her. As in, she loved Abi the way Abi loved her.
“I can tell something’s on your mind,” Lola said when Abi sat down at the bar.
“Yeah,” admitted Abi. “Mum, can you get me a beer?”
“Can I get you a beer, what?”
“Please?”
Lola chuckled. “Sure, if you’ll tell me what’s got you looking like that.”
“Bring me the beer first.” Abi’s heart rate sped up. She’d never talked to her mother about the Greta situation before, and she wasn’t sure if it was a good idea, but she really needed some solid advice right now, and no one did that better than Mum. Well, no one but Greta, and she couldn’t really go to her with this.
Lola put the open bottle in front of her daughter. “Get that down ya, and then out with it!”
Abi took a swig. “If I tell you what’s on my mind, you have to promise you’ll keep it between the two of us.”
“Sure. I can keep a secret. I listen to people’s stories all the time in this place and don’t repeat any of it.”
Abi stared down at the bar, taking a deep breath. “Greta tried to kiss me last night.”
Lola gasped. “Really?”
“Yeah. I didn’t see it coming.”
“Well, what did you do?”
“I…turned away.” She peered up at her mother, who was giving her a hard stare.
“You turned away.”
Survivor's Guilt Page 6