by M. Lynn
Etta had never truly accepted what lay between them. Before, it was because she worried the curse drew her to him and none of it was real. When the curse was replaced by her family’s magic, it became something else, something he couldn’t even begin to understand.
He reached out to tuck a tuft of hair behind her ear but then thought better of it and let his hand drop as he moved to the edge of the bed, swinging his legs over.
Clearing his throat, he slipped into king mode. “Riders were sent out last night. All Belaens in Gaule will soon know of the coming wards. I expect you’ll have many new arrivals in Bela.”
“Alex.” She hesitated. “Thank you.”
He grunted and got to his feet. Of course, she was only thanking him for aiding her people. It was always about them. For just one moment, he wished she’d ask something for herself.
Etta asked if he feared her and the answer was yes, but not for the reasons she thought. He never believed she’d hurt him—physically at least. But the thing that scared him most was the knowledge that Etta would sacrifice herself for her people without a second thought.
It was what a ruler should do, but she was reckless about it.
If Etta died, everything inside him would die as well.
He slipped into his own room to wash and change before stepping back out into the hall. His guards followed at a close distance as he left to find Edmund. His friend was with Tyson in the main hall breaking their fast.
Climbing onto the wooden bench, Alex leaned forward and rested his forehead against the rough grain of the oak table.
“How much did you drink last night?” Edmund asked with a laugh.
“Nothing.”
“Ah.” He shared a glance with Tyson. “You’re just queen drunk then.”
He lifted his head to glare at his friend.
Tyson eyed him. “Okay, I don’t want to know about my brother and sister’s… ugh… relationship.”
Alex groaned. “Stop saying it like that, asshole.”
“How else am I supposed to talk when my brother is in love with my sister?”
Alex swatted him upside the head.
Tyson laughed and rubbed the spot Alex hit.
“Just don’t say that to Etta.” Edmund chuckled lowly. “Although, I’d pay to see her beat your ass.”
Tyson shrugged. “I did say it. After I found out Viktor was my father.”
“Yeah, but that was before.” Edmund shook his head.
“Before what?” Alex asked.
Tyson leaned in curiously.
Edmund’s face pinched as if he’d said something he shouldn’t. “Just… Etta is different.”
“Obviously.” Tyson puffed out his chest. “She missed her brother.”
Edmund threw a hunk of bread at his head and he ducked out of the way. Alex laughed at them, but something pinched in his gut. Tyson was joking about the reason for Etta’s moods but that didn’t change the fact that he would miss his brother. He assumed Tyson was going back with them. Gaule was no longer his home.
Plus, Ty could never miss a battle. He’d returned to Gaule to fight the rebellion and now he was going to be a part of a fight much larger than that.
Alex would be able to cross the wards since he had no magic in his blood. He could see his brother. But only if there was something left after they faced La Dame.
It killed him that Gaule would be closed off, safe but unable to help.
A shadow loomed over the table and Alex lifted his eyes to Simon’s large frame.
“Your Majesty,” Simon said stoically. “May I have a word?”
Alex pushed up from the table. “Of course. I have to meet the duchess in the council chamber, walk with me.”
The first part of their walk was silent, but then the words tumbled out of Simon.
“I would like to ask your permission to remain in Gaule.”
Alex raised an eyebrow. “I have to admit, this surprises me. You understand what’s going to happen? Etta will erect the wards and you will not be able to cross.”
“I understand, sire.”
“Can I ask you why, Simon? I’ve seen you with your queen. You’re as fervently loyal as any Belaen and yet you do not wish to follow her?”
Simon’s steps faltered, and he didn’t speak for a long moment. “I have come to realize, your Majesty, that a man can have more than one queen. I am loyal to Persinette Basile and to my people, but my honor would not let me leave my charge here in Gaule.”
“My mother.” Alex nodded. “So, your loyalty is split?”
“I do not see it as so, sire. Loyalty, just like love, is not something we have in finite amounts. My loyalty is not cut in half to account for both queens. It is expanded to encompass the faith I have with each.”
“Then how do you choose?” His mind went to Etta. He loved her more than anything with one exception. Gaule. He’d always love his kingdom and the people in it.
“Your mother depends on my loyalty,” he answered. “Yes, Persinette could use me in the battle to come, but she does not truly need me.”
Alex sighed. Persinette Basile never needed anyone.
They reached the council chambers and Simon left to return to his post at the dowager queen’s side. Alex stepped inside to prepare for their journey to the border and the events that would come after.
Chapter Fourteen
“Are you sure this is the only way, your Majesty?” The intensity of Ara’s gaze was blinding.
Over the past few days, Etta had come to appreciate the quiet company of the General. She’d grown up as the bastard daughter of a duke–his only child with magic. Even with an accepting man like Duke Caron, that wouldn’t have been an easy life in Gaule.
Discrimination based on magic was not allowed on Caron’s lands, but that didn’t mean it didn’t exist.
Which was why they were in that place on that day, hovering near the line where two ancient kingdoms met. They stood in the shadow of the mountains where La Dame lay waiting behind her walls.
Alex sent his best riders into every corner of the kingdom. Their message? Leave. Get your families to safety. It was time to erect the wards that once stood along the border. The difference being this time there’d be people other than Draconians on the other side.
The only way to protect both magic folk and non-magic folk alike was to keep them apart.
Etta studied the contrasting features of Ara’s face. A firm set jaw and high, harshly cut cheekbones, but a soft brow and round doe eyes with sadness echoed in each of them.
She didn’t get a chance to answer her before the duke strode toward them. He touched her back and led her away for a private conversation.
Etta let her eyes roam across into Bela and over the lush rolling hills stretching into the distance. After a moment, she turned on her heel and headed back to the row of tents.
They’d been there for days as the flow of magic folk across the border was never-ending.
Tomorrow, the deadline would pass. They’d set a date for the wards to be put in place. It was plastered across the kingdom. One day and then she’d use her magic to cut the land in half. In truth, it would be an invisible line. One who didn’t have magic would never sense it. But if magic ran in your blood, you’d be prevented from crossing by unbearable pain leeching the magic from your veins. For miles in each direction, a buzzing in the air told magic folk a ward was near, alerting them to the danger.
She didn’t want to do it. God, she wished it could be different.
But wishes were for people who didn’t have crowns on their heads.
She didn’t get the luxury of pretty fantasies.
Alex stood near the opening of his tent watching her. He looked kingly in his navy-blue doublet and embroidered jacket.
She shivered as a blast of cold air worked through camp. Winter had hit them in full force. In the mountains, the paths would be blocked, but that wouldn’t stop La Dame. Still, Etta was under no illusions that she’d come. She wouldn�
�t leave her walls behind. No, all La Dame had to do was wait. Etta had no choice but to go against her. The only question was when.
“Are you cold?” Alex asked.
How did one answer that? Yes, she was cold, but not only on the surface. Once she crafted the wards, she’d never again be able to return to Gaule. That fact alone turned her entire body to ice.
Alex reached for her and rubbed his hands down her arms. She leaned into his touch and met his eye as if he could give her the answers; pleading with him to tell her this wasn’t going to happen.
As she closed her eyes, she wrapped her arms around his waist and breathed him in. For once, she was able to keep the magic from tainting her emotions. They’d spent every night together in the past few weeks and some of the ire left her with each moment by his side.
Alex rested his chin on her hair.
“Why are we always leaving each other?” Her words were muffled by his shirt.
He hummed low in his throat and held her tighter. “You don’t have to do this.”
“Please don’t say that. If you… just don’t. I’m not strong enough to resist if you ask me to forget about this.”
He kissed the side of her head. “You’re the strongest person I know.”
She pushed away from him. “Don’t say that either.” She shoved her way into the tent and sat down on the bedroll in the corner.
Alex followed her and crossed his arms over his chest. “Why not?”
Her magic pulsed, trying to rise and expand. She managed to hold it back, but the anger it brought didn’t go away.
Alex’s voice softened as he repeated “Why not?”
The anger wasn’t hers. She knew that now. It was the power inside her. But it felt like she owned every inch of it.
“Because I don’t want to be strong,” she yelled. “I want to say ‘screw it’ and forget about every person that’s waiting for me back in Bela. I don’t want to dredge up my dead father’s magic and every memory that’ll come with it.” She covered her face as the anger slithered away. “I don’t want to leave you.” Tears slid between her fingers as her back shook.
He knelt down in front of her and pried her hands away from her face before leaning in to press his lips against hers. She’d never get used to kissing him. To running her hands across his firm chest and up under the edges of his shirt.
“Tonight,” he breathed, leaning his forehead against hers. “I’m not the king of Gaule and you’re not the queen of Bela. Just for tonight can we pretend we have the entire future spread out before us?”
She wound her arms up around his neck, her fingers sinking into the back of his thick hair. “Kiss me please.”
He smirked. “Since you asked so nicely.”
She forced away the dark emotions swirling in the depths of her magic. It would not control her. Not tonight.
The power didn’t make her who she was. Etta was crafted by memories of her father, her love for Alex, and the determination of a warrior.
Alex’s hands worked to untwist her braid as he laid her back. “I would touch your hair for the rest of my life.”
Tears stung her eyes, and she blinked them back as she pulled Alex down on top of her and got lost in everything she’d never have again.
Alex laughed as Etta played with the tiny hairs on his chest. “That tickles.”
She raised her head to look at him and her heart stopped. He’d always been beautiful, but never so much as when he was… unmade. His dark hair stuck up in every direction and his lips were swollen with the memory of every kiss.
“What would you do if you weren’t the king?” she asked, a wistful note in her voice.
He ran the tips of his fingers along the curve of her waist. A shiver raced through her, her every nerve on edge.
“I’ve never really considered it. I was raised to be king. There was never another option for me.”
She tucked her head into the crook of his neck.
“What about you?” he asked.
She shrugged. “I’m still getting used to the idea of being the queen. Remember, I grew up thinking I’d spend my life serving you.”
“As my shield.”
She laughed. “The person who would step in front of arrows—as you once said to me.”
“I did not!”
“Oh, you definitely did. You told me it was a ceremonial position, and you didn’t think I’d actually be protecting you.” She laughed. “I remember protecting you quite a few times.”
“Once.”
“If that’s what you want to believe.”
He was quiet for a moment. “I’d like to see something other than Gaule–if I didn’t have to be king, I mean. The Kings of Gaule used to travel abroad, but that was before we closed our country off. It’s not even safe for me to visit some more distant parts of my own kingdom. Most days, I only see the inside of the castle walls. As awful as my time with La Dame’s people was, it made me see that there is so much more than a throne and the life that demands.”
“Alex–” She sighed, not knowing what she wanted to say.
“I reinstated the council’s powers my father took away.” The words were so sudden she startled.
She leaned away from him and met his stare. “That’s—”
“I know. But it was the right thing to do. My father’s purge showed us what happens when one person has too much power. I don’t know who will wear the crown after me but I must safeguard the people the best way I know how. Everything I do is for them.”
He didn’t say it, but she knew what lay between his words. He’d agreed to her plans to put the wards back into place only because the Gaulean people were no match for the magic that was coming for them. They couldn’t face La Dame without being erased completely. Not without magic.
Etta was operating under a lot of assumptions. After her father created the original wards, La Dame stayed away from Gaule. She hoped it was the wards that deterred her. She’d never questioned the strength of her father’s magic, but if La Dame couldn’t break it, it was unbreakable.
“Just because you won’t be able to cross the wards doesn’t mean I can’t.” Light entered his gaze and for a moment, Etta wanted to give into the tiniest bit of hope in his voice. “I can still come to you.”
The hope fizzled out as his words sank in and she tucked her head back against his chest. “You know we can’t…”
“Etta, there is no way I’m ever going to agree to never seeing my best friend, my brother, and the woman I love ever again. You can just forget about it.”
She breathed in the scent of him, committing it to memory. If there are any of us left. It wasn’t the first time she’d considered the possibility of La Dame beating them. If it were up to her, Tyson would stay in Gaule. Even as she herded the Belaens across the border to bolster their numbers in the fight to come, she wanted her brother safe.
But he wouldn’t hear of it.
“Are you scared?” Alex asked as if sensing the direction of her thoughts.
Etta sat up and turned away from him, her magic coming alive beneath her skin. “No.” It was the truth. She didn’t fear La Dame. Not anymore. Not when the power of the Basiles coursed through her blood.
She reached for her trousers and pulled them on without bothering with her underclothes.
“Where are you going?” Alex reached for her.
“We can’t stay in bed all evening.”
“Why not?”
She slipped her tunic over her head and belted it at her waist before shrugging on a cloak. “Come on. Get dressed. I’m not the only person leaving for Bela tomorrow. There are a lot of goodbyes to be had.”
She left him to dress. Nearby, a fire roared to life. Their party sat huddled on blankets basking in its warmth.
Tyson held Amalie in his lap. They too would be torn apart. Amalie wanted to join them, but Tyson begged her not to. She was safer in Gaule. At least until after they faced La Dame.
Too many people had faith in Ett
a.
She joined Edmund and Ara who were having an intense conversation.
“Your father is probably right,” Edmund said. “You may very well die.”
Ara scoffed. “So could every single person across that border. Why the hell would I sit here and wait for you all to fight a war I have every right to be a part of?”
“Am I interrupting something?” Etta lowered herself down beside Edmund.
“Edmund doesn’t want any competition for the general of your army.” Ara shot him a scathing look.
“My army?” Etta raised a brow.
“All of these people crossing into Bela will have to fight for you.”
“I will not force anyone into this battle.”
Ara fixed her with a harsh glare. “Are you trying to lose?”
Edmund scowled. “Don’t speak to the queen that way.” He crossed his arms. “Only I’m allowed to.”
“Children,” Etta said, looking to each of them in turn. “Calm down. Ara, you’re joining us across the border?”
“Of course.”
“You do realize you won’t be able to cross back into Gaule once the wards are in place?”
Ara nodded.
“May I ask why you’re willing to leave your family behind when you live in the one part of Gaule where magic people are generally safe?”
Ara leaned forward, resting her elbows on her bent legs. “I’m a bastard. That’s not new information.”
Etta nodded. She’d heard the story.
“My mother was killed by men who hated magic—on my father’s land. There is nowhere in Gaule that is safe for us. At least in Bela, I’ll get the chance to fight for people who don’t want to stab me in the back like I’m sure most of my soldiers do.”
Ara’s brutal honesty was something Etta respected. “Then we’ll be glad to have you.”
Edmund grunted out a “sure.”
They fell quiet as the crackling of the fire overtook all other night sounds.
When Etta spoke again, her voice was hushed. “Hateful Gauleans killed my mother too.”