Page 17
Author: Molly McAdams
My heart ached and I kept replaying last night and that morning in my head. I’d been so sure last night before waking her up, and then after our time out by the creek, I knew I had been right. Cassidy and I belonged together. I thought about Tyler’s statement and Cassidy’s confirmation when she walked into the kitchen and I felt sick. Raking my hands through my hair, I fell back so I was lying on the floor and looked up at the ceiling through blurred eyes. God, what was happening to me? I couldn’t remember the last time I cried. No . . . I did. It was when my grandma died when I was little. And now this girl, who apparently had no issues leading on one guy and messing around with another, was bringing it all out. I wanted to kick myself for falling for her. For spending an entire year miserable because I couldn’t be with her, and for once again letting myself think I could.
The sun had begun setting when my dad walked into my house. “Figured I’d find you here. ”
“Here I am. ” I let one arm make a sweeping motion before bringing it back to rest on my chest.
“You want to tell me why I walked into a house full of my confused family and a seriously pissed off Bradley family?”
“Not really. ”
“What about why Cassidy seemed so odd? She wouldn’t speak to anyone—hell, she looked about as messed up as you did before she got here. ”
“Are they gone?”
“Left a few hours ago. ”
“I can’t move back in with them, Dad. I need to get my own place this year. ”
He sat down next to me and stared at the stone fireplace. “We’re not leaving until you tell me what’s going on. From what I saw this morning, I wouldn’t have expected what I witnessed this afternoon. ” He looked down at me. “Or what I’m seeing right now. ”
“It doesn’t matter,” I said after a few silent minutes. “I thought she liked me. I was wrong. She’s still completely hung up on Tyler. ”
“Sure didn’t look like it this past week. ”
I groaned. “I know that, Dad. But trust me. They made it extremely clear this morning who she wanted to be with. ”
“How so?”
“I’d rather not repeat what I heard them saying. ”
“Maybe you didn’t get the whole story. ”
“No, I’m pretty sure I heard the entire damn thing. ”
He stood up and stretched his back. “Well, I can’t change your mind; no one can. But I just sat there listening to your sisters and mother trying to figure out what could have happened. And they all came to the conclusion that you hurt her. From the time they spent with her this week, apparently she was all talk about you, and not a damn thing about your cousin. ”
“I hurt her?!” I sat up and looked at him incredulously. “All she’s ever done is rip my fucking heart out!”
My dad didn’t seem surprised by my outburst, just stood there waiting to see if I was finished.
“I hate feeling whatever this is, and caring so much about her. There’s no reason some insignificant girl should make me this crazy. ”
“Insignificant?” he said after I’d lain back down with a huff. “You really think that?”
“No, Dad . . . I don’t. I’m just mad right now. Even after what happened this morning, I came here and thought about every part of the house I knew she would love. What I still wanted to add for her, and about how she would make this our home. ” I sat there clutching my chest, the ache there almost unbearable. “But that won’t happen. ”
He opened his mouth but shut it and continued to stare at the fireplace.
“I can’t take this. It’s like I told you a week ago before they showed up. I already hurt thinking about not having her in my life somehow. Even as just a friend. But I don’t know how to do that. I love her too much to just be her friend, and it kills me seeing them together. More so now. I don’t know what to do. I know I need to move out, but I know I won’t be able to stay away either. It’s like I’m asking for her to keep breaking my heart. ”
“I don’t know what will happen. But I think you should give it some time. You’re a part of the triangle, which means you didn’t get to see things the way the rest of us did. I admit it’s strange the way she clings to Tyler, and if I’d never seen her look at you, I would think they’re a couple too. But I did see the way she looked at you, we all did, and there’s no doubt—well . . .
“Maybe you should move out. Do that, and you can decide from there how to approach her. Whether that’s as a friend or if you keep fighting for her, you’ll decide then. You have three more weeks until you go back to Austin. Let’s finish out the summer work, then you can find a new place, concentrate on finishing school, and let the rest happen as it’s supposed to. ” He made his way to the door. “I’ll explain the situation to the girls, but you should come back to the house soon. I know you’ve been gone all day; you need to eat something, and there’s a storm rollin’ in. Should be here for the next few days. ”
“I’m right behind you,” I said from the spot on the floor I hadn’t moved from since that morning.
“It’ll all work out the way it’s supposed to. ”
I thought about Tyler holding Cass that morning. “That’s what I’m worried about. ”
Chapter Seven
CASSIDY
“QUAD ICED VENTI mocha for Natalie,” I called out, and looked at my watch face on the inside of my wrist; only five minutes left. I could do this. I set out making the last few orders of drinks and walked over to the supervisor taking over for me. “Do you need me to do anything before I head out?”
She glanced at me and gave me a bright smile. “No, Cass, see you Monday. ”
I was shaking so much it took me three tries to get my code in so I could clock out. It had been almost three weeks since I’d seen Gage and I knew he was coming home either today or tomorrow since classes were starting back up on Monday. I was a wreck, to say the least. Ever since Gage told us to get out and then walked away from me, I hadn’t spoken a single word to him, and my heart broke a little more with each passing day. I had no idea what happened or why he was so mad all of a sudden that morning. Tyler had been just as confused as I was. All I knew was Gage and I had gone right back to our normal back-and-forth routine of flirting then avoiding each other, only this time it was worse since I couldn’t see him. Tyler and everyone at work was worried about me, but I knew I just had to make it until Gage was back, then we could talk about everything face-to-face and try to fix whatever had gone wrong this time.
I walked home, my heart racing the entire time as I went through different conversations and scenarios for when he showed up. Most of them ended with me in his arms, his mouth on mine, and by the time I got home, I’d convinced myself this was all going to work out. Shutting the door behind me, I saw a grim-faced Tyler standing in the living room, arms crossed over his chest.
“You okay, Ty?”
He took a deep breath in and out before answering. “He’s gone, Cassi. ”
“Who’s gone?”
“Gage. He showed up right after I got home from dropping you off this morning, moved all his stuff out. ”
My heart painfully skipped two beats before I took off for his room. A sob stuck in my throat when I saw his bed still there, but bare, and nothing was in his closet, in his drawers, or haphazardly thrown around the room. He had made sure to do all this while I was at work; he left and didn’t even say good-bye. I tried to slip into indifference so Tyler wouldn’t see me lose it over this, but I couldn’t. My knees were weak in the worst way possible, my lips were quivering even as I tried to force them firmly together, and tears were blurring my vision.
“I’m sorry, sweetheart. ” Tyler wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his chest.
“I d— I don’t—why?”
“I don’t know, Cassi, but I’m so sorry. ” He turned me so I was facing him and cupped my cheek with one of his hand
s. “What can I do to make this better?”
“Nothing. ”
“Cassi—”
“I’m serious, I just . . . I just need to be alone right now. ” I moved out of his arms and went to our room, curling into a ball on the bed. When Tyler opened the door I spoke before he could. “Please, Ty. Just leave me alone for a while. ”
After giving me a kiss on my forehead, he turned and left the room.
“SWEETHEART, COME ON. Get dressed, let me take you out to lunch or something. ”
I sighed deeply and wrapped the pillow closer to my chest. “I’m not hungry, Ty. ”
“You need to eat, you’re losing too much weight. ”
“I’m fine. ” No, I wasn’t. This couldn’t be normal, not that anything between Gage and me had ever been normal. Not the sudden love I felt for him, not how I felt like I couldn’t breathe unless he was near me, and especially not how I’d slipped into a “zombified version of myself,” as Tyler liked to call it. I stopped doing Saturday shifts, but other than that I still went to work and continued to cook dinner for Tyler and the guys. When I wasn’t doing either of those two things, I was curled into a tight ball in bed, trying to ignore the intense pain of Gage ignoring me. It had been another three weeks since he’d moved all his stuff out, making it a month and a half since I’d seen or heard from him. Tyler still saw him at school, and I was glad that their relationship hadn’t suffered as well, seeing as they were still doing their Saturday-morning breakfasts at Kerbey Lane.
With a huff, Tyler walked out of the bedroom and shut the door behind him. Four hours later, I was just starting to think I should get up and start making dinner for him when he walked back in. His long strides were determined as he made his way to the bed; lifting me up into his chest, he slammed his mouth down onto mine.
I started to protest, but my heart was so shattered, I could barely find the will to turn my head away. “Ty—” I finally managed, but when I opened my mouth, he forced his tongue to meet mine as he laid me back down, his body following.
From Ashes Page 17