Elkan shook his head, all his anger draining away, leaving only a leaden ache. “Even if she left you, she wouldn’t come back to me. She never really loved me. But she loves you, Jamis. Don’t throw that away.”
Jamis glared at him a moment more. Elkan stared back. Finally Jamis let out his breath and turned away. In a tone of grudging respect, he said, “If you change your mind, my offer stands.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.” Something occurred to Elkan. “You know, I expect some Partners did stay.” Even for the defense of Tevenar Elkan doubted the Mother would allow Savir and Music to open windows onto intimate activities without the legal safeguards and public scrutiny of a court, but there was nothing stopping the Partners from passing on any information confided to them. “If you—no, it’s been years. You probably have no idea who’s working at the Safe Haven anymore.”
Jamis looked cautiously interested. “I’ve kept in touch. I could give you some names.”
“Could you send a list to me at the Mother’s Hall?” Savir could contact them and enlist their aid.
“All right.” Jamis still wasn’t happy, but the request had mollified him a little.
Elkan clapped him on the shoulder. “Take care of your family. That’s more important than any information you could learn in Elathir.”
“I will.” Jamis turned back toward the potter’s shop.
Elkan ran a hand through his hair and glanced at the sun. The quarrelsome herders and farmers down at the camp could wait until tomorrow. He badly needed to lose himself for a while in the warmth and wonder of the Mother’s power. Come on, Tobi. Let’s head back to the Hall. There are bound to be people who need healing.
Twelve
Tesi’s surroundings dissolved into soft golden clouds. A figure appeared before her, looking much like the statues of the Mother Tesi had seen outside Girodan temples—a matronly woman, her long black hair twisted into a simple bun, dressed in the flowing silk garments of an earlier age. She bowed to Tesi, her hands folded in the manner appropriate to a superior offering honor to a respected and highly valued inferior.
Courtesy demanded Tesi return the bow, regardless of whether the woman was real or merely a vision. She moved to fold her hands before her, but found that her scratched hand had become firmly fixed to the paw of the cat, who stood on a waist-high billow of gold beside her. She improvised as best she could with the hand that remained free, shaping it in the way that indicated polite skepticism without challenge, and inclined her body deeply to the woman.
Straightening, Tesi read amused approval in the woman’s eyes. Her voice was grave, low and musical, her words in Tesi’s native Girodan. “Greetings, Tesi Elovent. Are you willing to humble yourself beneath this cat and allow her to use my power through you?”
Tesi’s heart pounded. “Are you real, or is this only a vision in my mind?”
“Does it matter? The question is the same either way.” The woman watched her expectantly.
Tesi dropped her eyes. “I am afraid you have approached the wrong person. I do not worship you. I am a follower of the Great Sage, who in his wisdom reached the conclusion that the stories of the Mother are figurative, not literal. Perhaps this encounter shows he was mistaken. Or perhaps you are a metaphorical representation of my desire for healing power such as I have observed the wizards using.”
“Again I ask, does it matter?” There was definitely amusement in the woman’s face, but her voice was serious.
Tesi pondered the question. “I should think, if you are real, that you would not wish to choose one who rejects you to wield your power.”
“But I have chosen you, and made the offer. So perhaps I am not real.” Her mouth curved up a little, and the corners of her eyes crinkled.
Tesi narrowed her eyes. “But if you are my mind’s metaphor, do you have true power to give?”
The woman’s smile widened. “Only if you accept my offer will you know.”
Tesi looked at the cat, who gazed in rapt fascination at the woman. The cat’s actions had been real, surely. Or had the whole episode at the mountain overlook been a product of Tesi’s imagination?
She scrunched her eyes closed and shook her head. Questioning her senses was useless. The Great Sage had considered the senses the arbiters of reality, although he had acknowledged it was sometimes possible to deceive them. Still, she had no reason to believe this was not real, except that it went against her previous understanding of the world. And she’d already come to the conclusion that her understanding had been faulty and would need to be reshaped to conform to what she now knew to be true.
So, assume for the moment that what she was experiencing was genuine. “Why did you choose me? There are others far more suited to wield your power.”
The woman nodded. “Several reasons. First and most importantly, I believe you will bear my power well. I judge you more likely to do so than any of the other Girodans currently in Ramunna. Although I think most of them also could prove good wizards, and perhaps in time I will be able to offer them the opportunity as well. For now, however, I need one Girodan wizard, and you are my best available choice.”
She held up a hand to still Tesi’s next question. “Why do I need a Girodan wizard? I wish to spread my power to all Erovont, embodied in wizards of all nationalities. More immediately, I wish Nalini to continue to help the Ramunnan wizards become reconciled with the Matriarch, and choosing you will encourage her to do so.”
Tesi didn’t see how, but it didn’t really matter. Despite her best effort to stand courteously erect, her shoulders drooped a little. “Although your offer appeals to me, I am afraid I must decline.”
The woman studied her thoughtfully. “Will you share your reason?”
Tesi stared fixedly at the swirling gold cloud beneath the woman’s sandaled feet. “I will not cease following the Great Sage and convert to the way of the Mother. Even if in this one thing he was mistaken, still his wisdom far exceeds that of any other teacher. I committed myself to live by his precepts and devote my life to learning his truths. I can use the Art he taught us to ease pain and promote health. I do not need more power than that.”
“I’m not asking you to convert. Worshipping me is not necessary to bear my power. You do not even have to believe I exist. The only requirement is that you freely choose to subordinate your will to that of your familiar.” The woman gestured toward the cat. “You can do that and continue to follow the Great Sage. Indeed, he was wise, and the precepts he set down agree in almost all respects with my Law.”
Tesi’s heart accelerated. Might it really be possible? But she was still wary. “What do you mean, ‘subordinate my will?’”
“You will not control my power, your familiar will. She will agree to use it only in ways that accord with my will. Animals have no free will of their own, and so cannot choose to turn my power to evil, as humans did when they bore it directly. If you ever attempt to force Mimi to violate my Law, or she perceives that you are abusing the power the role of wizard gives you, she will break your bond.”
Tesi took a long time to think about that. So the woman was saying Vigorre and the others didn’t really use the Mother’s power themselves. Their familiars did. Remembering the occasions when she’d seen them work, she supposed that could be the case, but she could find no absolute proof. She could see how such a system would be a good safeguard against the sorts of abuse the legends described the ancient wizards perpetrating.
Would she be willing to give up control in that fashion? She thought she would. The Great Sage taught humility and deference to those older and wiser than oneself. If the woman—Tesi would not call her the Mother—granted the power, it was only reasonable that she decree how it might be used.
She looked at the cat. It blinked amber eyes at her. It really did look remarkably like Mimi.
She turned back to the woman and bowed, curling her free hand into the shape that indicated acceptance of a bargain between equals. She forced her voice to remain smoo
th and calm. “I am willing to do as you ask.”
The woman bowed, her hands mirroring Tesi’s. “May our association prove long and fruitful.”
Tesi’s vision blurred. The woman and the gold clouds faded, replaced by the moon-touched darkness of night on the mountainside. A single small sphere of glimmering gold light remained, enveloping her hand and the cat’s paw.
I’ll heal the wounds I made, if you don’t mind. Tesi felt an odd tugging sensation. The slight pain in her hand evaporated into a pleasant warm glow. Now, please, please, will you hold still for a moment so I can get rid of these awful fleas?
The gold light expanded to swallow the cat’s whole body. She shook, and many tiny insects showered onto the rock. Tesi jerked back with a startled exclamation. As her hand broke contact with the cat, the light extinguished, leaving Tesi half-blind in the darkness.
The cat’s white fur reflected the moonlight as it leaped into Tesi’s lap. That feels so much better.
The cat was talking to her! Not with a voice, but with thoughts. Tesi stared at it as it snuggled against her body. “Mimi?”
I like that name. There are happy memories in your mind when you say it.
“You know what I am thinking?” Tesi wanted to shrink away, but at the same time she was greatly enjoying the touch of the cat’s warm body and soft fur.
Only if you let me. The cat—Mimi—butted her head under Tesi’s fingers, and she obediently scratched around the base of her ears.
Followers of the Great Sage learned to be deeply mindful of the present moment. Tesi used her training in that discipline to put aside her wildly conflicting emotions and focus on the primal pleasure of petting a warm and affectionate animal.
By the time Mimi jumped down from her lap she’d gained something like equanimity. She rose from the boulder and turned resolutely toward the path down the mountain. “Come, Mimi. I suppose we need to tell the wizards—the other wizards—what has happened.”
Mimi fell in at her heels as she picked her way downward in the darkness.
* * *
“Excuse me?” said a soft voice.
Vigorre looked up from the notes he was writing. “Yes? Come in.”
The opening in the curtain parted. He was surprised to see Tesi slip through. She’d been studiously avoiding him and the other wizards since they’d taken refuge in the healers’ tent. They’d exchanged more words over today’s evening meal than they had in the previous two months, and it had been like prying barnacles off rocks to get anything personal out of her. The playful humor she’d briefly revealed had taken him by surprise.
She was solemn now, though. Almost grim. “There is something I must tell you.”
“Is something wrong?” Vigorre swiveled in his chair and scanned her for any sign of injury or illness, mentally reaching for Nirre. The eagle grumbled sleepily in his mind, but stirred on her perch and opened her eyes.
“No.” She hesitated a moment, then gestured downward. A scrawny white cat slunk from behind her legs and regarded Vigorre with intelligent yellow eyes.
He sucked in his breath. “A familiar.” The dark oval patch on the cat’s flank confirmed it. “Thank the Mother. I’ve been wondering when she would send us more. Thanna is getting impatient, and Seshone, too, although he’d never—”
She didn’t openly react, but something in the way she looked at the cat, with a sort of possessive awareness, alerted him. “Wait. You’re bonded, aren’t you?”
“Yes.” She folded her hands and bowed to him. “As leader of the Wizards’ Guild in Ravanetha, I place myself under your command.”
He wondered if he should stand up and bow in return, but contented himself with inclining his head. “You know I’m not really the leader, right? Kevessa and Borlen have both been wizards longer than I have. I don’t know why they keep expecting me to make the decisions.” He rubbed the back of his neck.
She didn’t reply, just looked at him. He waved at the other chair. “You spoke to the Mother?”
She ignored his invitation to sit. “I beheld a vision in which an honorable lady offered me power. After she assured me that I need not worship her, nor even believe that she is real, I accepted.”
Vigorre blinked. “Why wouldn’t you believe she’s real? I mean, you saw—”
“Do you know of the Great Sage?”
As part of his acolyte training he’d taken a course at the University on Ravanetha’s minority religions. They’d spent most of their time learning about the strange ways various small offshoots of the Temple worshipped the Mother, and about the Dualists, who were the most prominent group who didn’t. But there’d been a brief overview of a handful of other sects. Vigorre tried to remember. “He taught that the Mother and her power were figurative representations of people’s desires, right?”
Tesi nodded. “I am one of his followers. The honorable lady assured me I might remain so.”
“All right.” It didn’t make sense to him, but if the Mother had said it, he wasn’t going to argue. He turned to a more urgent question. “Did she give you any messages for me? Or the others?” He tried to keep the hunger out of his voice.
“No.”
“Nothing about the situation we’re in? No hint of what she wants us to do?” A fine leader he was, so pitifully desperate for guidance he must beg for any scrap the Mother might see fit to drop.
Tesi’s brows drew together. “She said she needed a Girodan wizard. She wishes Nalini to continue to help you become reconciled to the Matriarch, and she claimed choosing me would encourage her to do so.”
Vigorre let out an explosive breath and slumped in his chair. “We’re on the right path.”
Tesi regarded him quizzically. “I do not understand.”
Vigorre explained the Marvannans’ plan to assassinate the Matriarch and the wizard’s plan to save her. Tesi listened impassively, her blank face revealing nothing. “In exchange for her help, Nalini made us promise to send a wizard with her to Giroda when this is over. I figured I would go, if the Mother didn’t provide another option. But now she has. Assuming you want to go back to Giroda eventually.”
Tesi inclined her head. “Yes, I wish to return to my homeland in due time.”
“There you go.” Now that he was getting used to the idea, Vigorre found his spirits lightening. He picked up the detailed map of the palace he’d been studying and showed it to Tesi. “This afternoon Kevessa watched a meeting between Davon and Saronna, one of Keeper Yoran’s subordinates. Davon pressed him for information to pass on to his Marvannan contact. Saronna wouldn’t say much, but he did tell Davon that the Purifiers will provide the assassins a fishing vessel equipped with a rowboat.” He pointed to a jagged line on the map. “Borlen thinks that means the Purifiers must know of some place to land beneath the palace. The cliff goes right down to the water, and there are dangerous rocks everywhere. But if there’s a spot where a little boat could drop off a few men and a way into the palace’s secret passages, they could reach the Matriarch and attack her.”
Tesi bent over the map, studying it intently, although Vigorre couldn’t tell if she understood what she saw. “How do you plan to stop them?”
Vigorre sat back. A grin threatened to spread across his face, but he tried to contain it. He didn’t want to scare Tesi off with overwhelming demands so soon. “Nirre will fly over the ocean and watch for Marvannan ships. When she spots the assassins we’ll follow them, using windows to track them while staying far enough back they won’t see us. We’ll chase them through the palace, timing our arrival for the moment they reach the Matriarch, and stop them right before her eyes.”
“You do not intend to warn the Matriarch of the danger?”
“We would, if we thought she’d listen. But she’s convinced the Wizards’ Guild is her enemy. Even if we could get the information to her without revealing that we stayed in Ramunna, if she knew it came from us she’d think we were trying to trick her. And if she thought the warning came from some other source,
she’d have no reason to stop hating us. Frankly, in that case we might be better off if the Marvannans succeed.”
“Hmm.” The cat twined around Tesi’s legs. Absently she scooped it up and cradled it in her arms as she continued to study the map. After a few minutes she looked up. “I will help in whatever manner you require.”
“Thank you.” Vigorre stifled a yawn. “Let’s go see if Borlen is still awake so we can give him the good news.”
She stepped back. “I would prefer for you to tell him in the morning. And you may have Nalini inform Kevessa. But I think it would be better if no one else knows.”
“If that’s what you want. You can keep taking patients during the shows as usual. I have a feeling your needles will suddenly become capable of a great deal more than they were before.” He grinned conspiratorially at her. “Although you’d better make the change gradual if you don’t want anyone to notice.”
His smile faded when his attempt at levity met nothing but stony silence. What had happened to that flash of mischief from earlier? He hastily tried to smooth over whatever blunder he’d inadvertently made. “But you know, if you’d rather, you can just treat your patients like always, then come help us with ours. Borlen and I have had a big load since Kevessa left. You’ll need to work with us so we can teach you, anyway.”
“I would prefer to work under your guidance.” Her eyes dropped. “My Art has become superfluous. I can continue to present it as a public explanation for our ability to help people, but there will be no more need for me to actually practice it.”
“That’s up to you.” He was still curious about how her technique produced its effects, but she was right that the Mother’s power was far more useful. It was a shame that her hard-won skill would go to waste, but devoting her time and energy to wizardry would be much more efficient.
Tesi bowed again. “If you have no further questions or instructions, may I retire?”
“Of course. Get some sleep. You’ve had an eventful day.”
The Wizards' War Page 17