by Sarah Morgan
‘Kat.’ Josh interrupted her in a soft tone. ‘You’re chattering. What the hell’s the matter with you?’
He was the matter with her!
‘You were good, that’s all,’ she said gruffly, and there was a long silence. A silence that made her so uncomfortable that she turned away and concentrated on restocking Resus. As far as she knew, there was no substitute for work when it came to taking your mind off a problem.
And Josh Sullivan was definitely becoming a problem. A big problem.
Reaching for a new bag of saline, she ripped off the protective cover and attached a giving set. Then she did the same with a bag of dextrose, aware that Josh was just lounging against one of the low cupboards, watching her.
She became more and more flustered and turned her attention to the intubation tray. She snapped open laryngoscopes to check the bulbs; she counted ET tubes and checked tapes.
Then she was forced to go into his cupboard. ‘Excuse me.’ She moved closer to him and then realised her mistake. It was like stepping into a force field, programmed to draw her in.
She felt the brush of his arm against hers, the warmth of his breath, and for a microsecond she stilled, feeling the shock waves pulse through her sensitised body.
And then he moved.
Swiftly and without hesitation he hauled her against him, turning her so that she was pressed against the cupboard, giving her no option of escape.
But she didn’t want to escape. They’d been building towards this from the first second their eyes had met on the beach, and the moment his mouth crashed down on hers she was lost. The heat that had been building consumed her, the sudden blaze of passion burning through reason and resolve.
Without lifting his mouth, his fingers found the hem of her top and he jerked it upwards, his hand sliding, searching until it closed over one breast. The ache between her thighs rose to almost intolerable levels and she pressed against him, squirming to get closer and closer, feeling him rock hard and male through the thin fabric of his scrub suit.
Oh, God, how had she done without this for so long?
But the answer was immediately clear in her head. Because she’d never had this. Never once in the past had she ever felt this desperate, almost animal urgency to be with a man. Never once had she wanted a man the way she wanted Josh.
She felt the skilful sweep of his tongue and responded instantly, matching his greed with her own frantic urgency. There was no holding back. She wanted, needed, every bit as much as he clearly did.
‘Kat…’ He groaned her name and slid a hand down the back of her scrub suit, his fingers seeking and finding.
She cried out at the intimacy of his touch and clutched at his shoulders, her whole body shivering and trembling against his as excitement consumed her. His touch was wickedly good and she felt the heat build low in her pelvis.
He dragged his mouth from hers with obvious difficulty, his breathing uneven and his blue eyes hazy as his hands returned to her waist. ‘We can’t do this here. We need to find a room with a lock.’
She stared at him stupidly. A lock?
And then reality descended on her with all the brutality of a cold shower. Her eyes shifted from his handsome face, from the heat burning in his blue eyes and took in the bright lights, the metal and chrome and the sheer starkness of their surroundings.
They were in Resus and they’d all but made love on the trolley.
She closed her eyes, appalled and totally embarrassed.
What had happened to both of them? Neither of them had given any thought to their surroundings, to the fact that anyone could have come in and caught them. She gave a whimper of horror at the thought of what might have happened.
How could she have allowed it?
She squirmed with mortification as she acknowledged the truth. That she hadn’t just allowed it, she’d encouraged it.
‘This is crazy.’ She dragged herself out of his arms, wondering why it felt like the hardest thing she’d ever had to do. ‘I can’t believe we just did that.’
‘We didn’t do anything.’ His smile bordered on the regretful and he raked long fingers through his dark hair. ‘Unfortunately.’
‘How can you say that?’ She was pink with embarrassment, her eyes on the door. What if someone had come in? What if someone had caught them? ‘We were kissing! In the middle of Resus! In broad daylight!’
He gave her a sexy grin. ‘I can switch the lights off if it would make you feel more comfortable.’
She glared at him, her equilibrium disturbed by his smile and his nearness. ‘That’s not funny.’
His smile faded slowly and his gaze burned into hers. ‘Actually, for once I agree with you. None of this is funny.’ His voice was soft and he placed an arm either side of her, preventing her escape. ‘I can’t sleep at night and my concentration is failing. So what are we going to do about it, Dr O’Brien?’ His voice was still husky with passion and she felt her body respond instantly.
‘Nothing.’ There was panic in her tone. ‘Absolutely nothing.’ Her fingers fumbled and shook as she straightened her clothes. ‘We’re going to forget this ever happened.’ She tried to move away but he didn’t budge, his arms like iron bars between her and escape.
‘You think that’s possible?’
No. ‘Yes.’ She lifted her chin. It had to be possible. ‘Of course it’s possible. We just have to make an effort and—’ She broke off and smoothed her hair, thoroughly flustered. ‘We just have to distract ourselves and think about something else.’
‘Think about something else.’ His gaze dropped to her mouth and lingered. ‘Sweetheart, I’ve been thinking of nothing but you since the day I saw you on the beach dressed in that amazing wetsuit. And then when I saw you in your nightdress…’
His words made her breathing stop and she closed her eyes briefly. ‘Josh, please. We both know this isn’t going to work. We have to be grown-up about it. I’m trying. You have to try, too.’
‘Why’s that?’ His voice was rough and masculine. ‘Give me one good reason why.’
Her eyes flew to his. ‘You know why.’ Did he have to look at her like that? It made it almost impossible to breathe, let alone think. ‘Because I have Archie.’
He had very dark eyelashes, she noticed absently. And the contrast with the blue of his eyes was amazing.
Those blue eyes lifted back to hers. ‘And is Archie enough?’
She swallowed. Up until now, yes. ‘I come with a son. I’m not a single woman, Josh.’ She said it to remind herself as much as him. ‘I have a little boy and he figures in every decision I make. That’s the way it has to be and that’s the way I want it to be.’ She wouldn’t have it any other way. She adored her son.
‘But surely you’re entitled to a part of your life that doesn’t include him?’ Josh was looking at her now, his blue gaze disturbingly intent. ‘Married couples with children aren’t just parents, are they? They’re still a pair, a couple. They’re still allowed a relationship with each other.’
‘That’s entirely different.’
‘Why?’
She swallowed. ‘I would have thought that was obvious.’ She shrugged awkwardly, wishing he wouldn’t stand quite so close. ‘If you’re parents then you share a commitment so there’s no threat to the child’s emotional well-being—of course you have a relationship.’
‘You sound as though you’ve swallowed a textbook on child psychology. Theory doesn’t always apply to real life, you know.’
She sighed. ‘If I have a relationship with a man, Archie could get hurt. I’m not going to let that happen.’
‘Does he have to be part of the relationship?’ Josh’s voice was soft. ‘You put him to bed at seven-thirty. What happens after that?’
She stared at him. ‘Usually I eat toast and read a textbook.’
He gave a lopsided smile. ‘Gripping stuff. I can do a lot better than toast and I’m definitely more interesting than any textbook.’
‘I’m sure you are
, but—’
‘Dinner on Saturday night.’ His voice was soft. ‘I’ll pick you up at eight. That gives you half an hour to get Archie to sleep.’
Her heart pumped against her chest as she faced temptation. ‘We’re working.’
‘Only until seven,’ he drawled softly in that deep dark tone that made her knees weak. ‘After that we’re off until Sunday morning.’
‘What exactly are you suggesting?’
He gave a slow smile that was totally male. ‘I’m suggesting that we have a nice evening,’ he said smoothly, but there was a glint in his eye that took her breath away.
Temptation was dangled in front of her and she felt racked by indecision. For the first time for as long as she could remember, she wanted a man. Really wanted a man. Her body burned in a way she hadn’t believed possible. For the first time in ages she was remembering that she was a woman.
Why not?
Why shouldn’t she go on a date?
As Josh had rightly said, Archie wouldn’t even know about it so it wouldn’t cause him a problem. But what about her? She bit her lip. Would it cause her a problem?
Where would it all lead?
She looked up at Josh, looked into those wickedly sexy eyes watching her intently. It would lead precisely nowhere, because Josh was a man who liked his bachelor lifestyle.
But at least he was honest about that.
It wasn’t as if he was pretending to be something he wasn’t. Wasn’t as if he was offering something that he couldn’t deliver.
‘All right.’ She didn’t know who was more surprised, her or Josh. ‘Dinner on Saturday night.’ She wouldn’t commit to more than that. ‘Do you want me to book somewhere?’
He smiled. ‘No. Let’s do this the old-fashioned way. I want to be the one in control. I’m taking you out, Kat. My choice.’
Her heart flipped and she gave a slight frown. ‘We’re splitting the bill.’
‘Do me a favour.’ He placed his fingers over her mouth. ‘For one night, leave that fierce independence of yours at home.’
* * *
She thought of nothing else for the rest of the week and by Saturday she was so on edge that she could barely concentrate.
It was that kiss, of course, she told herself crossly.
If she hadn’t kissed him, she wouldn’t have ever known just how well Josh could kiss and she wouldn’t now be imagining all sorts of things that she shouldn’t be imagining. It was a good thing he couldn’t read her thoughts, or she’d be in big trouble.
All week her mind had been somewhere else. She’d been dropping things and staring into space until Hannah had actually asked whether she had a hearing problem.
And all the time Josh had been watching her. Stalking her. His pirate eyes full of promise. Promise of plunder and pillage.
She closed her eyes and tried to talk some sense into herself. Some solid, sensible, single-mother sense. But, no matter how hard she tried, her brain and her body just didn’t seem to listen.
Her heart was fluttering with excitement and nerves and no matter how many times she told herself that it was just an evening with a colleague, she couldn’t stop the feeling of lightness that spread through her body.
Because, of course, it wasn’t just an evening with a colleague.
It was a date.
A date with Josh Sullivan. And when did she ever date? It just wasn’t something she did. And she wasn’t just worried about the end of the date, and what happened then, she was worried about the date itself.
What if she did something wrong? Or said something wrong? She was out of practice making small talk with men and she wasn’t at all sure that she knew the rules. Was she supposed to flirt? Were there certain subjects it was better to avoid?
Cursing herself for behaving like a teenager, she tried to concentrate on the steady stream of minor injuries that flowed through the department on a typical Saturday.
One man had spent too long in the hot August sun and came in looking more than a little embarrassed, his face blistered and red.
‘Ouch,’ Kat said gently, as she picked up his notes and gestured to the vacant chair. ‘Have a seat, Mr Banks. No need to ask what the problem is.’ She eyed his scarlet skin with a sympathetic look in her eyes. ‘That looks painful. Did you fall asleep in the sun?’
He looked sheepish. ‘How did you guess?’
‘Because I’ve seen it before. People always underestimate how hot the sun can be, especially right on the beach because there’s so often a breeze. It masks the temperature.’ She stood up and washed her hands and then examined his face carefully. ‘We usually leave a simple sunburn exposed because it’s pretty awkward to get a dressing to stay on the face. Come round to the dressing clinic with me and we’ll get it cleaned up.’
She found Hannah finishing off a bandage on a lady with a sprained ankle. ‘When you’ve finished there, could you sort out Mr Banks for me, please?’ Kat put his notes in Hannah’s tray. ‘Just clean it up with diluted chlorohexidine solution and then cover it with liquid paraffin.’ She turned to the patient. ‘We’ll give you a tube to take home and you need to clean it twice daily.’
‘Can I shave?’
‘It’s important that you do,’ Kat told him as she wrote instructions in his notes. ‘It reduces the risk of infection. And make sure you sleep propped up on a couple of pillows for the first couple of days to reduce the swelling. How long are you here on holiday?’
‘Until the end of the week.’
‘Well, it probably goes without saying that you should stay out of the sun, and if you have any problems come back to us.’ Kat smiled at him and slipped the pen back in her pocket. ‘Enjoy the rest of your holiday.’
She left the patient with Hannah and returned to the cubicle where she was seeing patients. Josh was sprawled in the chair, waiting for her.
‘About tonight…’
Instinctively Kat glanced behind her to check that no one was listening, and he gave an amused smile. ‘Ashamed of me, Kat?’
Hardly. ‘I just don’t want to be the subject of gossip.’ She was having enough trouble handling her feelings when they were private. She certainly didn’t want everyone else to know.
‘Neither do I.’ He rose to his feet in a smooth movement. ‘Do you like Italian?’
At the moment she didn’t feel as though she’d be able to eat a thing. Her insides were just too jumbled. But she managed a smile. ‘Love it.’
‘Good.’ He stepped closer. ‘Three hours to go.’ His voice was low. ‘I’ll pick you up at the cottage at eight. Can I ring the doorbell, or will that wake Archie?’
She ran her tongue over her dry lips. ‘Archie’s spending the weekend with Mary because I’m working.’
A slow smile spread across his face. ‘So you don’t have a curfew?’
‘I don’t want to be too late.’ She felt her cheeks heat. ‘I have to pick up Archie the next morning and then we’re working.’
‘Ah, yes.’ He smiled. ‘You’re a doctor, too, and I’m in your light.’
She blushed as he reminded her of the words she’d used the first time they’d met. ‘I thought you were arrogant.’
‘I am arrogant.’
No. He wasn’t arrogant, and she knew that now. He was incredibly clever and talented. And staggeringly good-looking. But she had no intention of telling him any of those things.
‘I’ll see you at eight, Dr Sullivan.’ And, reaching past him, she picked up the next set of notes.
CHAPTER SEVEN
THE green or the blue?
Kat held both dresses up against her and still couldn’t decide.
The green looked good with her hair but it was cut a bit on the low side. The blue was slightly more demure on top but it was far too short. She’d bought it in a sale and then never worn it. In fact, she’d never worn either dress because she didn’t go anywhere that demanded that she dress up.
She squinted at herself in the mirror.
They would be
sitting down for most of the evening, she reasoned, dropping the green one back on the bed. The blue would be safer.
The silky fabric whispered over her hips and she looked at herself doubtfully. It was like staring at a stranger. This wasn’t the person she was, she thought as she turned left and right and studied her svelte outline in the mirror. She was used to dressing like a mother and this dress—she looked at herself long and hard—was designed to make a woman look like a woman.
And just for tonight that was exactly what she was, she reminded herself as she twisted her hair on top of her head and fastened it in place. Tomorrow it would be back to trainers and shorts, but for tonight she was allowed to assume that she wouldn’t be chasing a football on a beach or playing six-year-old games.
With that in mind, she left her legs bare, slipping her feet into a pair of strappy sandals that she’d never worn because the heels were too high and impractical for the life she led.
Relieved that Archie was staying with Mary so that she didn’t have to proffer explanations for the way she was dressed, she walked into the kitchen and glanced across at Josh’s house. He was late. She’d managed to get away but he’d been tied up in Resus. Was he still at work? Or had he changed his mind? The sound of the doorbell made her jump and she resisted the temptation to sprint to the door and yank it open. Play it cool, Kat, she told herself firmly, reaching for her bag and taking a deep breath before finally strolling to the front door. This was a one-off. Just one evening of fun between two adults.
She wasn’t going to get involved.
She wasn’t going to wish for things she couldn’t have.
She was just going to have a nice evening, no more than that. For once she was playing woman rather than mother.
Her heart rate increased and her fingers slipped as she fumbled with the lock and opened the door.
And all her resolutions dissolved in an instant.
If ever a man was designed to make a woman forget resolutions, that man was Josh.