by Jan Spiller
Mars also rules the way in which we go after the things we want. If you are operating on a subconscious level, when they get excited about a plan, you may have reservations and think it isn’t going to work: “Oh, my God, you’re married and have three kids. You could never do that!” Every time they start getting motivated to DO something, your tendency will be to throw a wet blanket on their initiative. Often they respond by not discussing things with you because of your negativity.
On a deeper level, you instinctively know that you are not allowed to participate in the style of energy they are displaying. However, it is appropriate for them in this lifetime and, in fact, causes them to thrive. Healing this part of the relationship requires you to make a conscious new choice. If you’re not going to support them on their personal path, at least don’t rain on their parade. For this relationship to be really successful, a better choice would be to consciously reverse your innate reaction: “Peter, I know you can do that!” The irony here is that once you begin to support their direction, you will find that they will reciprocate by having a more positive attitude about the changes you would like to see come about in the relationship.
What is happening on an unconscious level is that at some point in a past life, you combined your energy in a co-dependent way in order to reach a common goal. So now when they get excited about a plan, you tend to push them away to prevent a co-dependency from forming that might pull you off your own independent path. You also drain energy from their initiative so that they will stop relying on you and regain their strength and confidence in being able to go after things on their own, without your help.
If you are the MARS person:
If this is a romantic relationship, at the onset it may well be among the most intensive sexual experiences of your life. It will seem like destiny, and you’ll often feel certain that you will never again find such a powerful connection. However, over time, the sexual aspect will likely begin to change. The South Node person may not seem all that interested anymore, and their rejection could cause you to shut down your sexual energy. In order for the physical intimacy to continue, you need to become more aware of what pleases your partner. Rather than act on your own instincts in this area, you will both experience more satisfaction if you consciously cooperate with their sexual energy and desires.
If the relationship is non-sexual, it is probably a family member or other close connection with whom you have unfinished business from a past life. Your relationship will most likely have to do with combining energies on a project or joint financial venture.
If a significant person enters your life with this aspect, you have a contract with them stemming from a past life incompletion. Especially if they have a planet conjoining their South Node, they may have deliberately played a part in undermining your independence and initiative. Now they have a contract to make it up to you in this lifetime by helping you reclaim your ability to take the lead and assert yourself. Their influence may “compress” your initiative, invalidating the way you currently make decisions and take leadership.
However, just by becoming aware of this dynamic helps restore you to your personal boldness so that you resolve to take leadership in your own life and do it in your own way, no matter what! Even so, it’s best not to share your next plan of action with this person, as they can still inadvertently drain energy from your initiative.
Regardless of the role they are playing in your life, it is in your best interests not to fight directly with this person, since you are likely to lose. Ultimately, they have the upper hand in using the energy of the sign depicted—an “unfair” advantage that can undermine your desire to find solutions. When they have successfully paid back this karmic debt to you, they are also free of the burden of the past wrongdoing and the special spiritual connection suspended for their misdeed is restored to them.
South Node Conjunct Jupiter
Jupiter shows where we are naturally lucky. We have spiritual support in this area that helps us to win consistently on the material level. Jupiter is our natural connection with a Higher Power that protects us, guides us to victory, and grants us good luck wherever it is placed in our birthchart.
If you are the SOUTH NODE person:
Unless you gain awareness of the underlying dynamic of this conjunction, you are likely to inadvertently invalidate the other person’s process of personal growth, their expansion, and their philosophical beliefs and approaches to life. Where they are naturally optimistic and lucky, your influence may discourage them. This is because their philosophical approaches to life do not work for you, but they do work for them. As the South Node person, you hold the power to shift the outcome in this area of the relationship. In order to create success, you need to pull back and become more aware of your own separate identity. You can consciously validate your partner’s style and process of personal growth and development as being “on track” for them, without feeling that it has to work for you.
Especially if you also have a planet conjoining your own South Node, this meeting is a matter of destiny—a past life contract to pay a debt. In a prior incarnation, you may have deliberately encouraged this person in excessive behaviors for your own personal gain. Although they may have been temporarily successful in that lifetime, a co-dependency was formed in which they trusted you more than their own conscience or connection with Truth. Your influence fostered an attitude of “careless good luck” and validated a system of morality and ethics that was not correct. The Jupiter person has carried these patterns into the present incarnation.
So now this person will once again tend to trust you openheartedly in an unconscious and co-dependent way. However, your innate reaction will be to push them away from this blind spot. Your influence will help them overcome their tendency to choose the easier path of trusting another’s values over their own sense of integrity and truth. You also have a unique ability to see where their ethics are “off” and withhold your approval and support. Ultimately this can force them to turn to their own inner connection with Truth and align themselves with a spiritual path they can hold to on their own. On the most conscious level, you can also resolve the past debt by applauding them when they choose the high road over material or sensual rewards.
If you are the JUPITER person:
This person doesn’t understand—and really isn’t interested in—your spiritual ideals, your philosophical beliefs, or your faith in positive outcomes. Your personal style and the plans you have for expanding your world may not be supported or validated by them. In the area in which you most naturally have confidence and a history of good luck, their lack of faith in you can cause you to doubt yourself. So it’s best to not look to them for support in your process of personal growth. Turn to other friends for nurturing in this area.
What is happening is that the South Node person has subconscious memories of encouraging you to pursue a path that did not reflect the highest ethics and morality and was not in alignment with your own inner Truth. You trusted them and followed their guidance instead of listening to your own conscience. In this life they seem to “push you away” in order to prevent you from re-creating the former unhealthy co-dependency that existed between you. To this end, they may unintentionally give you bad advice, betray your trust, and/or encourage the excessive behaviors you pursued with them in your prior incarnation. In this life, their special gift to you is to support your independence in following your own spiritual path.
In addition, if this person also has a planet conjunct their own South Node, then they may have deliberately misled you and encouraged your excessive trust in them for their own benefit. If so, then this is a payback lifetime and their influence is destined to support you in being more direct and straightforward, and not indulging in behavior that brings you abundance in the material world at the expense of inner substance and Truth. To this end, if there is an area in which you are lacking correct ethics and integrity, they are likely to see
it and disapprove. From this relationship you are learning to trust and follow your own integrity.
South Node Conjunct Saturn
Saturn rules the area in which we most desire to experience success, yet fear it the most. This is our destiny: to overcome our inner inhibitions so that we can take charge and become the CEO in our own life. As we exercise the patience and attention to detail necessary to demonstrate success in this area, over time our greatest fears will dissolve.
If you are the SOUTH NODE person:
When you first meet the Saturn person you are likely to feel irresistibly attracted to the idea of really knowing them on a deep level. You somehow sense that there is an exchange of energy you need to experience with them.
At the same time, once you enter their life you don’t let them “get away” with anything. You are not fooled by their facade and your influence does not allow them to exhibit a public image that does not accurately reflect their achievements. You hold the key to helping them learn to recognize when the actions they take are based on a misunderstanding of how life works, and consequently lead to failure rather than the success they are capable of attaining. However, this may not be a pleasant process.
Especially if you have a planet conjoining your own South Node, in a past incarnation you may have deliberately robbed this person of the joy and empowerment of taking responsibility for creating their own success. It is likely that you manipulated the situation so that success came to them before they had completed the character development necessary to earn it for themselves. In the process, an unhealthy co-dependency in terms of attaining success was created between the two of you. An example of this dynamic is the “stage mother” who pushes her child to become a star before they are ready to handle it. The child receives money and fame that they have not earned through the development of their own character. This inflates their ego while robbing them of the strength and wisdom they would have gained from creating success on their own.
So now your presence in their life somehow blocks their success in the area where they most want to achieve it. You refuse to “do it for them.” This forces them to grow internally until—over time—they develop the strength and integrity of character that enables them to break through your restrictive influence. Then their willingness to take full responsibility for creating success will allow them to achieve much greater expansion in this area than what could have occurred without the role you’ve played in their life.
Having a planet conjoining your own South Node shows a past life contract to be fulfilled and, on an unconscious level, you have been seeking this person to pay back the debt you owe them. Because of the psychological injury you caused them for your own personal gain in that incarnation, you forfeited part of your own spiritual wisdom. In the process of repaying your debt and helping them to heal in this area, you open the way to reconnect with your own spiritual legacy.
On the highest level of resolution, the Saturn person is your teacher in this lifetime, steering you back onto your spiritual path. However, until you become conscious of this process you tend to minimize their input. This has the result of actually forcing the Saturn person to become even more attuned to the message of spiritual awareness they are destined to bring you, and they are able to integrate it on a deeper level than if the two of you had not met. In this way, two individuals coming together with this conjunction are a shining example of the complexity that underlies our relationships and how they can work on the highest level.
If you are the SATURN person:
It is your destiny to manifest success in the area shown by the placement of Saturn in your birthchart. This is the very part of your life in which you feel limited and awkward due to past life misunderstandings about how to create success. The South Node person likely played a significant role in a past life scenario that has led to this current blocked situation, and is now in your life to help you to heal it.
For example, they may have paid you compliments and given you reassurance—which you believed. Then when the anticipated success did not come, it created a confusing combination within your psyche [you]: a strong ambition to succeed together with misinformation about how to do it. So now this person doesn’t allow you to “get away” with exhibiting anything less than your own true potential in the area where you are stuck. When you stand for something you have not yet fully integrated into your life; when you pretend to be an authority where you are not qualified; when you say one thing and do another, this individual will call you on it. They see the flaws in your character that hold you back from real achievement, and will not give you the respect you seek until you have taken full responsibility for manifesting your dreams with integrity.
Especially if this person also has a planet conjoining their own South Node, in a past incarnation they may have deliberately pushed you into situations that made you totally reliant on them for their own benefit. This cost you your independence, but the results were so successful in a worldly way on the material level that you are now unconsciously driven to seek the same experience. So now when you meet this person in this lifetime, they activate your drive for success in full force. But—in order to repay their karmic debt to you—they can’t let you rely on them for that success. Their job is to push you to develop those aspects of your character that will allow you to achieve success on your own.
One way they may do this is to again push you into creating success in this area too quickly. They may give you bad advice that results in an unstable situation. They put you in touch with your vulnerability and force you to look more deeply at what you really want to manifest in this life. Their job is to help you see that you can consciously manifest your own destiny with integrity, instead of it being an unconscious compulsion that pulls you into situations or pushes you out of them.
Wherever you have Saturn in your chart, YOU ALONE have the ability to tap into its power to achieve the success you desire. In any area where you are consciously growing and learning to overcome a sense of awkwardness, the South Node person may actively invalidate your process. This deflates your ego and opens the way for you to experience humility. The progressive transformation of Saturn in our life takes time and full conscious knowledge and understanding of the process involved in creating success. But when you do become mature enough to take responsibility for fulfilling your destiny, it will be from an ego-free position of integrity that is stable and lasting.
South Node Conjunct Uranus
Uranus represents our urge for aliveness and the excitement of change. Its placement in our birthchart shows—by house and by sign—that area where we most need to be able to express an unconventional approach to life. We have innovative ideas in this area—sometimes even brilliant ones.
If you are the SOUTH NODE person:
If you are unaware of the dynamics of this conjunction, you will likely be a restraining influence on the Uranus person’s urge for innovative action. Where they need the freedom to explore their own way of perceiving and living life in order to maintain a sense of aliveness, you will unconsciously block their independence.
The truth is, their desire for excitement and to be free from the status quo does not work for you—but it does work for them. You hold the power to guide the outcomes in this area of the relationship. To create success you need to pull back and become more aware of your own separate identity. You can consciously choose to validate their need for increased aliveness, change, and freedom as being “on track” for them, without feeling that it has to be the correct approach for you as well.
Additionally, if you also have a planet conjoining your own South Node, then you have a specific past life contract with this person. You may have deliberately encouraged an excess of unconventional behavior and erratic action for your own benefit in a past incarnation. As a result, the Uranus person still doesn’t have proper boundaries to help them channel their desire for excitement and freedom in a way that is socially
acceptable. On an unconscious level, you are repaying your debt to them by restricting their unconventional approach to life. This forces them to grow deeper within themselves, to purify their urge for aliveness and brilliance, and gain the wisdom to handle it in a more balanced and judicious way. When they have matured, their urge to express their individual, unique, freethinking spirit will rise up stronger than ever, but through your influence they will have gained the wisdom to express it without inviting negative repercussions.
If you are the URANUS person:
The South Node person seems to not honor your uniqueness, nor do they let you get away with willfulness. You may feel that you are not encouraged to use your innovative abilities to create change, excitement, and aliveness in your life, and that your needs for freedom are being restricted by this person.
In a past life, it’s quite possible that they provoked you into pursuing thrill-seeking behavior that was harmful for you. Now their presence in your life forces you to become less reliant on their approval and to depend on your own judgment in choosing proper pathways to achieve excitement and freedom.
Also, in the process of being a constrictive influence on those ideas and choices that are a source of aliveness for you, they inadvertently make you grow stronger and more independent, possessed of an inner certainty that you can pursue your own path.
For success in this relationship, don’t look to them for approval. They may not validate the unconventional choices you make, and yet those very choices are what make you feel alive. Because of their own past life experiences, the path that increases your joy is a path they are not allowed to follow in this lifetime. Turn to others to understand and share those ideas that excite you and lead to positive change.