by Untamed
“Humph.”
He put his hand on top of mine. “Baby, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
He leaned back. “Uh-oh. That means it’s definitely something.”
“It’s nothing.”
“Are you still upset with me about choosing Alison?” he asked curiously.
“No. It’s not that.”
“So it is something.”
Giving in, I looked at him for the first time and inhaled sharply. I didn’t want to jump into asking him about his sex life at work, because he would’ve known it came from Sara and Jeanine. So I chose the safer route and the more feasible question.
“When am I going to meet your brother?” I asked abruptly.
He looked shocked. “Where did that come from?”
“I’m just wondering. I mean, you’re staying with me, and you’re practically my family. My mom, sister, and boys love and adore you, and I haven’t even met your brother. You don’t talk to him or talk about him. Don’t you find that odd?”
The pleasant demeanor that he had had when he first came outside faded and was replaced with looks of curiosity and confusion. “Really, Meka? Where is this coming from?”
“Really, Gavin? Why haven’t you answered my question?”
He rubbed his hands across his mouth and then knocked on the table. “Can we talk about this later? You’re eating, and I have work—”
My head tilted, and I gave him a sidelong glance. “Why? It’s a simple question.”
Our stare down lasted a few minutes, before Gavin grunted and said what was on his mind. “Okay. Spill it. Somebody said something to you.”
Feigning ignorance, I asked, “Why would you say that?”
He bit his bottom lip. “Now we’re playing games, huh?” he asked, tight lipped.
I pointed to myself. “I’m not playing a game. In fact, all I want is the truth.”
His work cell sounded, indicating that he was needed back on duty. Well, I guessed he could thank God for small favors. He looked at it.
“I have to go, baby.”
“I’ll bet you do,” I said smartly.
He shook his head. “I promise we’ll talk later.” He leaned over to kiss me, but I turned my face so that his lips landed on my cheek. “Okay, Meka. All right. I’ll see you later, baby,” he said with frustration.
“Later, Gavin,” I said nastily.
Aggravated, he shook his head and walked off. Sitting there, I couldn’t even finish my food. Here I was, thinking I had the man of my dreams, and now it seemed that I was being made a fool of again. Something wasn’t right about Gavin’s family, and I wondered if I should even bother to stick around to find out what.
“Trouble in paradise?” I heard from behind me. It was none other than Tony.
I turned to face him. “Wouldn’t you like to know.”
He chuckled. “When am I going to see my boys?”
“When you stop harassing my man.”
“I don’t have a clue what you mean.”
Scoffing, I sneered, “Sure, you don’t.”
He let out a slight huff and pursed his lips. “I came over because you looked a little stressed out. I thought I’d try to be of some comfort to you. Don’t let the white boy get up under your skin.”
With my face turned up, I said, “His name is Gavin.”
“I really don’t care,” he said nonchalantly.
“I do.” My attitude was already on go, so he had better tread lightly.
Tony frowned. “What do you and that dude have in common, Meka? So what if he listens to some black music and he knows some slang? For real, what can he really do for you?” Tony asked, clearly frustrated.
“None of your business. What goes on between Gavin and me has nothing to do with you. In fact, you should leave us alone.” I gathered my food and got up to walk inside. “Don’t you have an appointment or something to get to?”
“I miss you, Meka,” he said, walking up behind me. “He may have you now, but I gave you the boys. I was your first everything.”
“Get away from me.” I turned to face him. “You disgust me.”
He licked his lips. “You turn me on.”
I stepped back. “I thought Kwanzie did,” I sneered.
The comeback took the wind out of him, and a sad expression took over his face. “That was below the belt.”
“So is all the shit you’ve pulled lately. Look, I just want to be happy.”
“He’ll never make you happy. Just wait and see,” he said to me as I walked off. “Oh, and Meka, Heinekens are for bitches,” he called out and laughed. I knew Tony was behind that shit.
When I walked inside, I walked right past Gavin. “Didn’t you two look close,” he said with an attitude.
“It’s not what you’re thinking,” I said, shaking my head. “You’re one to talk. You still haven’t answered my question.”
“We’ll talk later,” he said, then walked away with an attitude.
“Indeed, we will.”
Chapter 19
Charice
Knowing the truth about what Ryan had done was a hard pill to swallow, but I did. For the sake of my marriage, I pushed back everything he’d done. Despite my feelings, I’d made the decision to marry Ryan, instead of giving my heart time to heal and grieve, so I had to take responsibility for my actions. Despite what Ryan had done to win me back, I was still his wife. I had vowed to remain married even through the worst of events, so I couldn’t turn away from that now. I was raised to stick out my marriage, not jump to divorce. So here I was, remaining Mrs. Westmore.
“Don’t you look so cute?” I said, admiring Lexi in her sundress and ruffled romper. I hugged her close, and the fresh baby smell melted my heart, as it did every time.
Ryan came into the room. “So what time is he supposed to be here?” he asked with an attitude.
“Lincoln should be here in a few minutes.” I sighed. “I really wish you would get in a better mood. What’s done is done. Lexi is his daughter, and Lincoln hasn’t done anything out of character. All he’s done is taken care of his daughter. Besides, you haven’t been here for one visitation, and you promised to apologize to him man-toman.”
“This is only his third one, and besides, the other two times I had other obligations. I can’t help it if I’m still a little upset about this whole thing. I don’t trust him,” Ryan complained.
“For what? He’s adhered to what we agreed in court,” I said in Lincoln’s defense. “He gets five in-home visitations first to make sure we’re comfortable with him taking Lexi away from home. He gets one week a month with his daughter and a two-week vacation with her, then every other holiday. He’s already paid his child support for the next six months, and he doesn’t cause any trouble when he comes over. The only thing that has changed is that Lexi’s last name is now Harper instead of Westmore. He even agreed with us about keeping the court case and ruling sealed and out of the public record.”
“What are you? His attorney?” Ryan asked snidely.
I rolled my eyes. “I’m just saying that the best thing for us to do at this time is to get used to the way things are.”
Just then, the doorbell rang. Ryan slowly turned around and headed out. “Let’s go downstairs.”
He had been so surly since everything had transpired. He had refused even to speak to Lincoln throughout the entire process; however, Lincoln had remained a gentleman. He had refused to stoop to Ryan’s level and had always kept Lexi and London first. I was so proud of him for that. He’d also agreed to allow me to be London’s dance instructor. We’d had our first dance lesson last week, and she was very talented. She was also very excited that Lexi was her sister, and despite all the hell us adults had brought to the situation, it’d actually turned out to be a positive thing for London. She wanted to be a role model for Lexi, and having her here had brought her and Lincoln closer together.
“Hello,” Ryan said plainly after he opened the door.
“Hello, Ryan.” Lincoln nodded. “What’s up, Charice? How’s my baby?” he asked, equally as excited, his arms outstretched, as Ryan stepped aside to allow them in.
I handed Lexi to Lincoln. “Here you go.”
“Man, I’m still trying to get used to this. It’s been years since I’ve held a small baby,” he said as he gently patted Lexi on the back.
“Can I hold her, Daddy, please?” London asked, and Lincoln eyed me for my approval.
“Sure. Let’s go to the living room, where you can sit and hold her,” I said, and then I led them through the house to the living room.
“Where’s Ray and Ryan?” London asked.
“Over one of their friend’s house,” I answered.
We all sat down in the living room, and Lincoln handed Lexi to London. “Be careful.”
“I know. Hold her head and back,” London said.
“Exactly,” he said to her.
“Lincoln, can we step into the kitchen for a second? Ryan wants to tell you something,” I said. Ryan looked at me as if I had said something wrong, but he walked into the kitchen with us.
“What’s up?” Lincoln asked, standing face-to-face with Ryan.
Ryan looked over at me, and I gestured for him to go ahead. Squaring his shoulders, he began. “I wanted to tell you that I’m sorry for my part in keeping Lexi away from you and for causing issues with you and London,” he said, with his arms folded across his chest.
Lincoln chuckled, picking up on Ryan’s resistance. “Are you sure about that, or are you doing what your wife asked you to do?”
Ryan sucked his teeth. “It was my suggestion, but I figured you wouldn’t see it that way.”
Lincoln folded his arms. “What am I supposed to do with your apology now?”
“Accept it and let it go,” Ryan said tensely.
Lincoln’s face showed that he didn’t buy any of what Ryan had said. “I appreciate that sincere and heartfelt apology. I’m sure that took a lot out of you to come up with.”
Ryan was about to say something that I knew was going to be a smart-ass comment, so I intervened. “All right, gentlemen. Our daughters are in the next room,” I reminded them, before an argument or fight ensued.
Ryan nodded. “Whatever, man. An apology is an apology.”
Lincoln shrugged. “You’re right about that,” he said and turned to face me. “If you don’t mind, I’d like to go back and enjoy my daughter.”
“Of course.” I held Ryan back by the arm as Lincoln headed back into the living room to be with London and Lexi.
“You apologized to him as if you lied to me about being sorry for what you did,” I said after Lincoln had left the kitchen.
He bent down and kissed my forehead. “I am sorry. This entire situation is hard for me. Can we get through this visit?” he said, then turned to leave. Deciding to let it go, I followed him back into the living room.
Ryan was so aggravated that he stayed for only about ten additional minutes before he made up an excuse to leave the house. I was actually glad when he left, because the tension in the air lifted for everybody as soon as he was out the door, and I got to sit back and have fun watching Lincoln, London, and Lexi interact. Lincoln fed Lexi, changed her, and rocked her to sleep as if he was an old pro.
After their visit was up, I called Ryan.
“Are they gone?” Ryan asked as soon as he answered his phone.
“Yes, they are. Where are you?”
“At Jabari’s house, shooting pool. I should be home in another hour or so.”
“Well, I’m going to the dance studio to get everything set up for next week. I left Lexi with Johanna.”
“Cool. Like I said, I should be home in an hour or so.”
“A’ight,” I said and hung up.
I didn’t have time for Ryan’s nonchalant attitude, and I certainly wasn’t entertaining his foolishness. Lincoln being in Lexi’s life was something that never should’ve been kept from him, and I wasn’t going to sit around worrying about Ryan’s feelings over the situation. It was what it was, and I wasn’t worried about it.
When I walked into the studio, I set the alarm and locked back up. I put the security camera on in my office and made sure the rest were on their designated timers and positions. Then I headed to my office, turned on the radio, and sat my purse and keys on my desk. There was nothing like putting in a little work to relax me from the stress that Ryan brought to the table, I thought as I headed into the side room attached to my office.
“Ready to put in some work?” I asked.
Lincoln’s bright smile met mine. “Always.” I walked over to him and straddled his lap. “Especially after that lame-ass apology your husband gave me.”
I put my index finger to his lips. “I didn’t come here to discuss Ryan.” I leaned in and kissed him.
“How long do we have?” Lincoln asked.
“An hour,” I answered as we undressed.
Lincoln cupped my face and kissed me passionately. “I love you, Charice.”
“I love you too.”
For the next forty minutes, Lincoln and I made love, as we’d done several times over the past couple of weeks. When I was with him, nothing else mattered. It was he and I, just as it always should’ve been. Who said I couldn’t have my cake and eat it too?
Afterward, Lincoln and I lay cuddled together on my sofa, our fingers interlocked, as he kissed my neck and earlobe.
I giggled. “You know those are my spots.”
“Mm-hmm.” He kissed my neck again.
“You know I can’t get it started again. We have to get clean so that I can make it back home before Ryan gets suspicious.”
Disappointment oozed from him. “Why are you with him?”
I pecked his lips first, and then I pulled back and caressed the side of his face. “We’ve gone over this. I took a vow to stay married to him.”
“Yet you’re here with me.”
“And that’s the most important thing. It’s so complicated right now. The boys have already lost their sister. I can’t take them through a divorce right now. Despite how evil Ryan is, he loves his boys and me.”
“But you love me.”
I nodded. “Yes, I do, but I’m his wife.”
“Do you still love him?”
“I care about him, and I have love for him. He gave me my beautiful triplets, and my dream career, but if you’re asking me if am I in love with him or if he has my heart,” I said, “you should know that the answer is no. I feel that way only about you, Lincoln. So please let’s enjoy our time as it comes, okay?”
Closing his eyes, he took in what I’d said before finally giving in again. “How could I tell you no?”
“You can’t.” I giggled.
“You’re right.” He chuckled and then got serious. “You know he’s getting frustrated because you’re not pregnant yet.”
“Yes, I know, but as long as he doesn’t know about my birth control, then he can keep on being frustrated with the situation and not me. And your talking-ass friends tell you too much stuff. I can’t believe Ryan is still telling his business partners his personal business.”
Shrugging, he admitted, “They are looking out for me.”
“Yeah, I guess in a way it helps. He’ll confess to them his inner thoughts versus telling me. That is one slick bastard. It took a minute for me to see that Ryan could be a totally different person from what he shows, but I get that now.”
Lincoln ran his hand through my hair. “I hate that you became his wife before you found that out,” he said, then kissed me again. “I want to marry you so badly, Charice.” He leaned his forehead against mine. “Damn. I want to make you my wife.”
“In my heart, I am,” I said as I stood up and wrapped the blanket around my naked body. “You first to the bathroom.”
He stood up, his naked body glistening from the swe
at of our lovemaking. I couldn’t deny that Lincoln’s body beat out Ryan’s in every department. My man was so fucking fine.
He bent down and kissed me. “We’re still on for our getaway this weekend, right?”
I winked at him. “Definitely,” I said, and then I smacked his ass as he walked into the bathroom.
Sitting back on the sofa, I reveled in my current situation as Lincoln showered. Ryan may have me as his wife, but Lincoln had my heart. Ryan had been making a fool of me since high school, and I was tired of being a doormat and a fool. It was my turn to hold the puppet strings, so I had made a decision to have everything I wanted—my life with Ryan and my love with Lincoln. Like I said, I had taken a vow to remain married to Ryan, not to be faithful to him. As for the “forsaking all others” part, well, Lincoln never came before my kids and my household. He understood that and accepted it, so for now, I enjoyed the hell out of having my cake and eating it too.
However, in the back of my mind, I knew the inevitable loomed. Sooner or later, I’d have to make a choice. But what would I decide?
Life or love?
Chapter 20
Terrence
“Hey, Aaron. It’s me, Terrence, again.” I spoke to his voicemail for the umpteenth time. “Man, when are you gonna get over this shit? I’ve been calling you for weeks, trying to apologize. We’re family. I was upset about Trinity, and I reacted with a hot head. But I love you, cuz. You know this. I forgave you when you broke my arm in the third grade, while doing those karate moves, didn’t I?” I laughed. “Well, anyway, call me. I need to hear from you. Peace.”
I hadn’t spoken to Aaron since I shot him in the shoulder, and Thomas had said that every time he brought my name up, Aaron said he didn’t want to talk about me or to me. Ain’t this a bitch? I got that I had snapped, but I had snapped for good reason. He had tried me on my manhood and every nigga knew you didn’t fuck with a man over his manhood, his money, and his cookie. Hell, you could get over on me about my money, and I would overlook it, when most niggas wouldn’t, but you couldn’t try me on my manhood or fuck with my lady. Period. Hell, on a good day you may even be able to get me to overlook the fact that I got tried on my manhood, especially if my kids were around, but never . . . ever . . . ever . . . ever on Trinity. Ever.