by Lynette Noni
“Let me know if that changes,” she said. “You know I’ll help in any way I can.”
“You better get going,” Zain said, deflecting her words. “I’ll see you in Combat tomorrow. At least try to fight, won’t you?”
“Goodnight, Zain,” Alex said pointedly, not waiting for his response before taking off for her class.
Over the next three days Alex was snowed under with schoolwork. Even their normally leave-study-in-the-classroom History teacher, Doc, had assigned a three-thousand word paper on the relevance of Agnus Cordon’s hierarchical government structure and how it compared to the modern day monarchy. Talk about snore-worthy. Alex had literally fallen asleep in the Library while researching the topic.
When Friday night rolled around, she finished the last of her exhausting assignments and decided to reward herself with an early night. She was in the bathroom getting ready for bed when she heard the door to her dorm open and seal shut again. She was about to call out a greeting to D.C. when she heard Jordan’s voice in the other room.
“You’re overreacting, Dix,” he said, sounding exasperated.
“I’m not,” D.C. replied. “I really don’t think you should go.”
“I don’t have a choice,” came Jordan’s muffled reply, his voice quieter than before. “You know that.”
“You do have a choice!” D.C. cried. “You’re almost eighteen—what are they going to do? Ground you? You don’t live with them anymore!”
“Dix, what’s really going on?” Jordan asked. “Why are you acting like this?”
There was a loaded pause and Alex stepped closer to the door separating them. She felt bad for eavesdropping, but there was no way she could announce her presence now without it being awkward for everyone.
“I just…” D.C. trailed off before trying again. “I just don’t feel very good about this.”
In the gentlest voice Alex had ever heard him use, Jordan said, “Hey. Nothing’s going to happen to me.”
Alex barely made out the words when D.C. whispered, “Promise me you’ll come back?”
“I’m only going for the weekend, Dix,” Jordan said, his tone still overwhelmingly sweet. “I’ll be back Sunday night. Earlier, if I can.”
“No.” D.C.’s voice was filled with urgency. “I need you to promise. No matter what happens, promise me you’ll come back. To us. To me.”
Alex felt her stomach churn uneasily at her friend’s desperate plea. Jordan must have sensed something as well, since it took him a moment to respond, and when he did, his voice was rough with emotion.
“I promise, Dix,” he whispered. “I promise I’ll come back to you.”
D.C. let out a sigh, and there was a rustle of noise where Alex presumed her two friends were embracing after their semiintense moment. She wondered how long she’d have to wait in the bathroom before she could make a stealthy escape.
“Bear’s waiting for me down in the Rec Room,” Jordan said. “You coming?”
“Yeah, that sounds good,” D.C. agreed. “I probably won’t be sleeping for a while yet.”
“Still having the nightmares?”
Jordan and Bear had eventually been told about D.C.’s recurring nightmares that had exhausted both girls the week before the SAS weekend. After Alex returned from the trip, D.C. had settled back into her normal sleep routine. Mostly. Once or twice a fortnight she still woke up screaming, but that was about it.
“No,” D.C. answered. “Not as often, anyway.”
She said something else then, something too quiet to hear, and a moment later Alex heard the door to the dorm room open and close again. Alex waited a few seconds to make sure they didn’t come back before she stepped out of her hiding place.
“I thought you might’ve been here. We don’t usually leave the bathroom door closed.”
Alex jumped and held her hand up to her fluttering heart.
“Dix! You scared me,” she spluttered, seeing her roommate standing next to the window. “I thought—uh—”
“I told Jordan I’d meet up with them in a minute.” D.C. looked Alex squarely in the eyes. “Did you hear everything?”
“I’m sorry,” Alex apologised, shuffling her feet on the carpet. “I wasn’t sure if I should interrupt or not. I didn’t mean to listen, but it was kind of hard not to.”
D.C. blew a strand of hair out of her eyes. “Don’t worry about it, Alex. It’s not like you heard anything I wouldn’t have told you about, anyway.”
“Can I—um, can I ask what that was all about?”
D.C.’s eyes darkened and she turned to look out the window into the night. “Jordan’s parents want him to visit Chateau Shondelle for the weekend. He’s leaving first thing in the morning.”
Alex felt her throat constrict at the thought of their friend having to spend the next two days with Marcus and Natasha Sparker. “Since when do they want anything to do with him? Whenever they do see him, they don’t actually want to see him. What gives them the right to demand his attention?”
“They’re his parents, Alex,” D.C. said quietly. “You know how much he wants to please them. If they say ‘jump’ he won’t ask ‘how high?’—he’ll just do it, if only to try to make them proud. He’d do almost anything to earn their love.”
“So he’s going back to his childhood home for some quality family time? Is that what you’re telling me?” Alex asked, more heatedly than she’d intended.
“I don’t like this any more than you do,” D.C. snapped.
Alex looked into her friend’s anguished eyes and could see the truth of her words. “I’m sorry, Dix. I’m just worried.”
“I know,” D.C. mumbled. “Me too.”
“I’d planned on having an early night, but I think I’ll come down to the Rec Room with you, if that’s okay?” Alex asked, grabbing a hoody to pull on over her pyjamas.
“Yeah, sure,” D.C. said, leading the way out the door. “I think that’s a good idea. Just the four of us hanging out together. Exactly like it should be.”
Alex looked at her friend closely, wondering about the unusual tone of her voice, and then she shook her head and let it go, figuring D.C. was distracted by Jordan’s family predicament.
When they reached the Rec Room, Alex walked directly over to Jordan.
“Ah,” he said, seeing the look on her face. “I guess I don’t need to tell you where I’m going this weekend?”
When she didn’t say anything, he placed his hands on her shoulders and sent her a reassuring look.
“I’ll be fine, Alex,” he said, squeezing his hands gently to emphasise his statement. “I’ve already promised Dix I’ll be back by Sunday night. And I would have to be stupid to break a promise to her. That could mean public execution in the town square, for all I know.”
Alex ignored his attempt to joke and looked straight into his eyes, trying to read more than his words. After a moment, she saw how much he believed what he was saying—not the execution part, the coming back part. She would just have to trust that he knew what he was doing.
“Just be careful, yeah?” Alex said, relenting at last.
“You know me,” he said with a crooked grin. “‘Careful’ is practically my middle name.”
“Hmm.” Alex tilted her head. “I thought your middle name was ‘Obnoxious’? Or was it ‘Arrogant’? Oh, wait, I know. It’s ‘Stuck-Up’, right? ‘Jordan Stuck-Up Sparker’. It has a ring to it, don’t you think?”
Bear snorted and D.C. cracked a smile. Jordan’s response was to let go of Alex’s shoulders and move a few feet away, picking up a cushion from the nearest couch and throwing it at her. She ducked just in time, but it sailed directly into D.C.’s face, prompting what turned into an all out pillow war with Jordan and Bear versus D.C. and Alex. The light-hearted moment was exactly what they needed to turn the tense atmosphere into something much more relaxed, and the rest of the night continued in the same carefree manner, with the four friends enjoying one another’s company and laughing into the early h
ours of the morning.
“He’s not back yet. He said he’d be back tonight. Where is he?”
“Calm down,” Bear said, reaching for the pacing Dix and pulling her onto the bed beside him.
It was Sunday night and Alex, Bear and D.C. were in the boys’ dorm room, waiting for Jordan to return. They had all managed to keep busy enough over the weekend to keep their fears at bay, but none of them had heard from him since he’d left the previous morning and they were now growing increasingly concerned.
“It’s not curfew yet,” Bear reminded them. “Don’t worry, he’ll be here soon.”
Despite his comforting words, from her position on Jordan’s bed, Alex could see the strain in Bear’s features. He was as worried as they were.
As the seconds ticked by, the three friends tried to stay occupied by talking about their upcoming Kaldoras break. But it was hard to remain on the topic for long, especially when every few minutes one of them would glance at the time displayed on their ComTCDs, which only served to increase their anxiety.
At last, the door clicked open. Alex sat bolt upright and felt relief wash over her at the sight of Jordan stepping into the room.
He closed the door behind him, sending them a cocky smile. “I should go away more often if this is the welcoming committee I’ll get every time I return.”
As if his words broke a spell, the three of them leapt up to greet him.
“Don’t even think about it, Jordan Sparker,” D.C. said, wrapping her arms around him.
Jordan closed his eyes as he returned her embrace, which gave Alex the chance to look at him properly. His face was paler than usual, but that could easily have been because the temperature outside was turning bitter with the arrival of winter only days away. His rugged-up appearance supported her theory, since he was covered from head to toe—beanie and gloves included.
“Cold back at the Chateau?” Bear asked, noticing as much as Alex.
“Freezing,” Jordan said as he released D.C. and grabbed his friend in a one-armed, back-slapping hug. “It’s barely been two days, but it feels like I’ve been gone forever. Yeesh. I need to get a life.”
“We’ve missed you,” Alex told him quietly, and Jordan stepped over to her and hugged her last.
“Missed you, too,” he whispered in her ear.
Alex’s body jerked in reaction to the broken-sounding words that neither D.C. nor Bear would have heard. She pulled back to look at his face and her breath hitched at the tormented shadows lurking in his eyes. But then he blinked and the emotion was gone, making her question if she’d really seen it in the first place.
Jordan released her and grinned widely as he looked around the room. “What did I miss while I was gone?” he asked, sprawling onto his bed.
Alex was stunned by his one-eighty change of emotion. She sat tentatively beside him and D.C. and Bear resumed their positions on the other bed.
“No way,” D.C. said. “You tell us about your weekend first. What happened? What did you parents want?”
Jordan shrugged. “They just wanted to see me.”
Alex raised her eyebrows at him—and she wasn’t the only one—but it seemed like he was ignoring them in favour of digging through his backpack. Whatever he was looking for eluded him, and he gave up his search and noticed their waiting expressions.
“What?”
“Your parents called you back to their place just to say ‘hi’?” Bear asked dubiously.
“Seems like it,” Jordan answered. “Weird, huh?”
“Did they say why they wanted to see you?” D.C. pressed. “Or why it was so urgent?”
“Nope.” Jordan stood and walked over to his desk. He shuffled some books around before huffing quietly and turning back to them. “I’m starving. Does anyone have any food? I thought I had something in my bag, but I must’ve left it back home.”
Home? Had he just referred to Chateau Shondelle as ‘home’? As far as Alex knew, Jordan hated the place where he’d grown up. His home was Akarnae, and his second home was the Ronnigans’ house in Woodhaven. Chateau Shondelle was just a cold reminder of a lonely childhood. The only person who had ever actually cared for him had been his brother Luka, but he’d killed himself when Jordan was eleven. All in all, the chateau was hardly a place of happy memories for Jordan.
“Home?” Bear asked, picking up on the word as well.
Jordan froze for a split second before his posture relaxed and he corrected, “My parents’ home. Old habits die hard.”
Alex was looking at Jordan with concern as he searched for something edible on his desk. When he realised that his search was fruitless, he walked back to his bed and sat down again.
“Sorry to be antisocial, but I’m wiped,” he said, covering an almost believable yawn with his hand. “I should try to sleep before my stomach eats my kidneys and keeps me awake all night.”
No one seemed to know what to say to that.
“Um, sure,” Alex agreed, slowly standing to her feet. “I guess we’ll, uh, leave you to it. See you both in the morning.”
“’Night,” Jordan said, stretching out his legs and cupping his hands behind his head.
Alex looked pointedly at Bear as she and D.C. headed to the door, and her dark-haired friend nodded, understanding her silent request to press Jordan for more information after they were gone.
The moment D.C. and Alex were in their dorm room, they turned to each other.
“Was it just me or—”
“It definitely wasn’t just you,” D.C. interrupted as she folded onto her bed, holding her head in her hands.
“Hey, are you all right?” Alex asked, sitting beside her friend.
“I’m worried,” D.C. admitted after a quiet moment. “I can’t help but wonder…”
When D.C. didn’t finish, Alex asked, “What is it, Dix?”
The other girl shuddered slightly and raised her head, her expression scarily blank. “Nothing, Alex. I’m sure it’s nothing.”
Alex was about to protest, but D.C. said she was tired and escaped to their bathroom to get ready for bed. When she came back out, she barely whispered a quick, “Sweet dreams, Alex,” before she slid under the covers and rolled over to face the wall.
When Alex settled into bed a few minutes later, she couldn’t shake off a sense of foreboding. Jordan was back, safe and sound, so why wasn’t she more relieved? Sure, his behaviour seemed a little off, but he’d just spent the weekend with his parents who demanded too much from him and gave nothing in return. That would mess with anyone’s head. He just needed time, she figured, and then he would be back to normal.
But as Alex drifted off to sleep, she couldn’t get the image of his tortured blue eyes out of her head, and she wasn’t the least bit surprised when D.C.’s terror-filled screams woke her up later in the night.
? 1D;
Twenty-Three
“I just wish he’d tell us what happened, you know?” D.C. complained as she and Alex walked away from the Stable Complex, struggling to make a path through the snow that had blanketed the academy grounds during an early season snowstorm the previous weekend. “I don’t like that he won’t talk to us about it.”
Two-and-a-half weeks had passed since Jordan’s visit to his parents and he hadn’t given them any details about his time away. In fact, Alex had barely seen him outside of classes since his return to the academy, and she was more than a little worried about his continued absence during social hours. She couldn’t help wondering if his parents had done or said something to him and, being a typical guy, he’d built up walls to keep everyone else from realising how upset he was.
If Jordan would open up to them rather than avoid them, they could talk about it and try to help him. Or at least remind him that his real family wasn’t necessarily related by blood.
“I know, Dix,” Alex agreed. “But we can’t force him to talk to us.”
Unfortunately.
“I wish we could,” D.C. said, sounding weary. Her nightmares ha
d returned with a vengeance over the last two weeks, and while they didn’t wake both girls every night, her screams interrupted their sleep at least every second day. Both of them had dark circles under their eyes, and D.C. looked constantly ill.
“Maybe you should skip PE and go take a nap?” Alex suggested, worried about her friend.
“You know, I think I might,” D.C. agreed, surprising Alex. Normally the red-head wouldn’t have given in so easily. She must have been exhausted.
“I’ll try to find Bear and see if he’ll have a word with Finn for you,” Alex offered. Bear’s gift sometimes came in handy, that was for sure. While it might not be ethical for him to ‘charm’ their PE teacher into letting D.C. skip her lesson, his… influence… would at least keep her out of trouble for missing the class.
“Thanks, Alex,” D.C. said, smiling gratefully.
Alex nodded and took off to find Bear. He and Jordan both had Delta Archery for their final class of the day, so she hurried over to the Archery fields, hoping her friends would be early. Much to her relief, she spotted them quickly and asked for Bear’s help just in time for him to run off and ‘speak’ with Finn. That left Alex and Jordan standing alone together for the first time in weeks.
“How are you doing?” she asked, trying to subtly examine his appearance. Lately everything about him was just… drawn.
“I’m good,” he said, smiling at her. Despite his words, the usually carefree expression didn’t quite reach his eyes, and he failed to keep his gaze locked on her. He looked around as if searching for a distraction. “How ’bout you?”
She made a face at their tense conversation before mimicking his response. “I’m good.”
“That’s good,” he said.
“It’d be better if I believed you,” she said bluntly.
He tilted his head and gave another un-Jordan-like smile. “You know me, Alex. Would I lie to you?”
She looked away from him and said quietly, “You mightn’t be lying, but I don’t think you’re telling the complete truth, either.”
“Trust me, Alex,” Jordan told her. “I’ve never felt better.”