by Rani Manicka
‘Codes?’
‘The codes to the matrix. They give one the ability to manipulate reality in the physical realms or what you and I understand as unlimited power. It will mean one suddenly has a 360° vision. Distance becomes void. You think of someone or someplace and they are there or you are instantly there. Time will be accurately viewed as an intentional fabrication. And, of course, the beauty of cyclical time is that it holds the secret of immortality.’
‘What makes you think Green has the codes?’
‘Both demons and gods jealously guard them.’ Kite smiled suddenly. ‘Goodbye, Black. If you see Green again give him my warmest regards.’
Carter stepped forward. ‘This won’t hurt,’ he said.
But it did. For the first time in his life Black felt the prick of a needle in his flesh. Then a kind darkness gathered him in her arms.
Aye, when the blood was offered, Forth came they to dwell among men.
- The Emerald Tablets of Thoth
The first thing Black saw when he came to - was it really all over? - was his mother’s tear-stained, worried face. Bent over him in his own bed. When she noticed his eye movement she gave an odd cry of joy. Yee-yah. He stared at her in amazement, not for the odd sound, or how much she had aged in a few days, but for the beautiful, glowing colors that surrounded her. Flashes of gold, white, blue, and a purple so royal and rich he did not think it existed. With no inkling of the astonishing colors she walked inside, she hugged him and cried and laughed and thanked a whole pantheon of Hindu gods for returning him to her. Her joy knew no bounds. Hours they remained together, she talking and he listening, as it had always been. What a joy. How much he had missed her. Tears flowed from his eyes.
When she saw them she dashed her own away roughly with the backs of her hands. ‘I know I shouldn’t cry, but I can’t help it. I thought you were dead, but out of nowhere they came tonight, drugged me, and while I was unconscious, installed you in your bed. I really thought I’d never see you again when you lost the game. It was the most unbelievable thing: more than a billion people signed on during the last couple of hours and voted yes. I didn’t want to watch that man in the white mask and coat come into that room where you were to be injected with what they said was a lethal dose of poison, but I had to. I had to watch or I would never have believed that it was done.
‘Oh! It was terrible. I followed your heartbeat on the monitor and watched it become weaker and weaker and finally become a flat green line. Until that moment I had never suspected that human beings could be so cruel, so indifferent. I mean, I know we let millions of children die of starvation, but that’s only because none us really has the ability to do anything about it. But that they would decide in cold blood to murder a sweet child right before their eyes. We are a terrible species.’ She closed her eyes tiredly. ‘I never thought I’d say this, but I am actually ashamed to be human. Perhaps Lord Carrington’s friends, the eugenicists, are right, after all: humans are a cancer on this Earth and we deserve to be wiped off its face.’
It was dark outside and the clock showed it was 3 a.m. She refused to go to bed and for hours Black heard of all that had happened while he had been away. It was nearly five when she fell asleep in a chair she had pulled up to his bed. He watched her sleeping and felt a great welling of love for her. She did not know it, but he had felt her hug, her rough palms on his body, and her lips on his face. Slowly, triumphantly, he closed his eyes, and thought of Dakota.
So long since he had seen her last. Kite had kept his part of the bargain by rejoining him with his mother, but was he the kind of man who waits for your guard to be down before he smashes you with his clenched fist? He remembered Dakota’s forlorn voice, ‘They will never set me free.’ Black longed for sleep so he could meet her in his dreams, but sleep was a sea far away. The harder he tried, the farther the tide went out. He opened his eyes. He was fortified with a drug that kept sleep in a knapsack.
Morning arrived. His mother fed him and bathed him. As she had done all his life, but it was dishwater strained through a rag. He was Eve without a fig leaf. Shame, what shame. When her hands moved over his most intimate parts he cringed and worried. What if he became a rock? But he didn’t. The moment was quick, and passed without emotion or incident. She kissed him on his face and left. Happy. None the wiser. All was well in her world.
The next eight hours were torture. He could not sleep and neither could he distract himself from the vultures that circled Dakota.
It was exactly three o’clock when Green appeared. He was blazing yellow.
‘Yellow?’
‘It is the color of fall, when things are withering and falling to the ground. Our time is nearly over.’
‘Oh, Green,’ he whispered. ‘How will I do without you?’
‘Don’t lose heart.’
‘How can I not?’
‘I have a gift for you.’
‘Gift?’
‘Yes.’
‘But first tell me about Dakota? Is she well?’
‘Be patient, she is well but I will tell you everything before I leave.’
‘Kite said you have the codes.’
‘I do.’
‘You never said.’
‘You never asked.’
‘Has any human ever received them?’
‘Yes, in the distant past when men still retained a measure of their awareness.’
‘Can I get them?’
Green looked at him strangely. ‘Your controllers want the codes so they can live forever in the artificial matrix as the rulers and the owners of unimaginable wealth and unlimited power. That is what all the bowing and scraping to accommodate entities that require blood and sacrifice by all their secret societies is for. But even the deceiver demons they venerate as gods know how dangerous the codes are in the wrong hands, and will only pretend to give them or parts of them. Why do you want them? Would you want to be trapped in this machine with the likes of Kite even with the codes?’
‘I thought the codes made escape from the matrix possible.’
‘You don’t need codes for that.’
‘What does one need then?’
‘To escape something you only have to know what it is that holds you and release yourself from its hold. Remember the movie The Matrix. Amongst all those flying bullets were grains of truth. The entire human race is accurately represented by the Judas character, Cipher, who elects to be reinserted into the mainframe of simulation with the immortal words, “I don’t want to remember nothing. Nothing, you understand. And I want to be rich… Someone important… Like an actor.” Every human is returned to this prison because of his desire for a better illusion. Rejecting all is the method used by the yogis and the monks, but there is another way. It is more difficult but the rewards are greater.’
‘What way is that?’
‘That brings me to your final and most important lesson. How to defeat the Archons. Are you ready?’
‘Yes.’
‘First, let’s find some compassion for them. Pretend you are someone who only eats pork. And you have spent a great deal of time and effort rearing a whole sty full. One day you find out that your pigs are slowly growing wings and they could very soon fly away. If you let them continue you will starve to death. That is the predicament of the Archons. Fourth-dimensional beings, who are about to lose their food source, a race of third-dimensional beings on a journey to the fifth and sixth dimensions. Above all they must keep the human race as prisoners and slaves in the lowest form of trance, like sleeping aphids, so their only method of escape, which is claiming their own divine evolution, is impossible. Defeating them is two-pronged.
‘First, you must find the nothing from which all came and all must go to. Silence. Here you will realize that you have nothing to defend, nothing to fear, nothing to strive for, as you are already complete and connected to the highest source of power. That every perceived want is based on what you have been told you need and every artificial system of belief is simpl
y so that you will not check out of the feeding grounds that the predator race has meticulously designed as the game of life.
‘When you have found this perfect place of silence you must conquer the persistent desire to speak into that silence. The real warrior leaves no marks, no tracks. Be fierce about it or you will never win. And this is especially important - vow never to retreat even an inch from this place. When you have conquered all desire, even the need for food, then you will be able to shake loose your soul from its bondage by the night dwellers. You will be able to enter and exit the matrix at will.’
‘But how do I enter silence if I can’t stop my thoughts, and if, as you said, they are not mine, anyway?’
‘Don’t try to stop them. Simply watch them without any judgment. The parasites hate being watched. They slink away very quickly. And now it is nearly time for me to go, but first my parting gift to you. I cannot give you the codes, but I can give you a wonder-filled, long life with Dakota in a different timeline. In this life you will be an ordinary human able to use all your limbs.’
This incredibly beautiful phoenix from the ashes of his love? Black was so stunned that for a while he could not respond. An ordinary life was what he had dreamed for, but with Dakota added, his joy knew no bounds. He tried to calm the wild surge of joy, but it would not be tinkered with. ‘What about my mother? We must bring her too.’
But Green was shaking his head. ‘I’m afraid she won’t be able to come with you, Black. The only place I can insert you into is a timeline where she does not follow the rainbow that leads her to you, and you freeze to death at exactly 4.15 a.m. on the same day.’
Black felt confused and lost. To start a new life without his mother? It would break her heart. She had devoted her entire life to him.
‘And if I decide not to accept this gift?’
‘Your life will be measured in weeks.’
Black was silent for a long time. ‘I will explain it to her,’ he said finally, sadly. ‘She will be happy for me, I’m sure.’
Green shook his head gravely. ‘I’m afraid you can’t even do that. If you do, her reaction and actions will lead her to spend time in a prison and end her days in a mental asylum.’
‘How will it work then?’
‘By the time she awakens in the morning you will be gone and she will assume the same people who took you before have kidnapped you.’
‘How will that affect her?’
‘She will be sad, very sad, but she will come to accept and recover.’
Black said nothing and after a while Green said, ‘Well, it is time I was going.’
‘Wait, will you arrange it for me that I can spend an hour with my mother with all my limbs working? I promise not to tell her.’
‘All right, you will have one hour with her.’
Slugworth tempted all the boys and girls to steal from Wonka... All did... But one... And he inherited Wonka’s kingdom…
- Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (1971)
The spasms that shook his body came soon after. They were pain-filled and yet what joy, what beauty. The shudders were feeding his body until he could move his head to one side, see that way, then the other. At the deepest, most fundamental level he was transforming, muscles were softening, lengthening, opening out, healing. Acid crystals were being expelled. The mechanisms inside his body were like scurrying mice; they even made a sound. The groups that had been long asleep were beginning to work together. Giving his bones integrity. His spine stretched as if it was alive, a snake inside his body.
His hands, his legs… All changing. He pressed his elbows into the mattress, his head arching back in an uncontrollable stretch. Long, slow, a dinosaur awakening from its long slumber. The sensation was incredible. The weight of his head was astounding. He jerked his head forward. It snapped into place. He looked at his hand, made it into a fist, and slowly released it. Amazing. He flexed his hand. There was surprising strength in it.
His elbow straightened. He drew his knees up and with his palms flat against the bed, pushed his feet sideways under the duvet until they no longer touched anything. He swung his legs down. He turned to his side and pulled up. He was sitting up. He flexed his shoulders - it was a good feeling - and stood. Oops… Dizzy. For an instant he swayed and had to steady himself by grabbing his bed. The feeling passed.
He straightened slowly and looked around the room. Strange perspective. He wriggled his toes - Oh, delicious - put a foot forward and almost tripped on the toes that bent into his feet. He stopped and flattened his feet. Slowly, Black. And tried again. One small step. Another bigger step. And then wow! The wonder of it. He was walking. He stood at the door to the darkened living room and looked in. Without switching on the light he went to the bathroom.
He tugged the light switch. Use the toilet, like a man, Black. He stood in front of the toilet, aimed carefully, and smiled to see the stream hit the water in the toilet bowl. He flushed it and walked to the mirror. He ran his hand over his bald head.
‘Hello,’ he said. The sound was soft, foreign.. His tongue worked as if he had used it all his life. He looked at himself and smiled. Not bad. His face broke into a grin. ‘Good teeth, Black boy.’
A key was inserted into the door downstairs. He left the bathroom. He heard her on the stairs. He walked into the darkened space of the living room and stood in the middle. She opened the door. To say she was shocked would be to badly understate her reaction. She dropped to her knees. Her eyes opened wide, and her mouth gaped and closed then opened again.
‘Black,’ she called, her voice shivery, unsure, as if it was an imposter who stood in her living room.
‘Yes, it’s me, Mother,’ he said, and smiled.
She stared at him. As if he was angel. Then she frowned. He speaks! Her brain appeared to have slowed down. She could not process the scene before her eyes. ‘Did you walk from the bedroom? Can you walk?’
He took a few steps toward her, performed a deft pirouette, laughed, and went to kneel at her feet.
Her eyes were shining like stars. ‘I can’t believe it. Let me see you walk again.’
He shot up like a rubber ball, jogged on the spot, moved away from her, did a karate chop movement complete with high kick and corresponding noise, and jogged back to her and hugged her. All the love, all the gratitude for this woman who had cared for him all his life without any compensation was in that embrace. She hugged him back hard. Holding the body of the man she had treated as a child. ‘Don’t move,’ she said and listened to his heartbeat. ‘Oh, how I love you,’ she cried out suddenly, and began to sob helplessly.
‘Don’t,’ he said. ‘I love you. I always have and always will. More than you could ever imagine.’
She nodded, though it was uncertain if she had really heard anything he had said. ‘You are really cured, aren’t you?’
He smiled at her, but so sadly that she gripped his arm in terror. ‘You are really cured, aren’t you? Tell me you are permanently cured.’
‘Mother, let us sit together and talk. I don’t know what tomorrow will bring but I need you to listen to me.’ And he raised the woman up from her knees in his strong, large hands and led her to the sofa. She followed, compliant and unquestioning.
‘Before I do anything else I want to thank you for cleaning me every day without fail for all these years. More than anything else that was the one task that I wished I could take away from you. My own smells used to make even me cringe. I felt sorry for you. If there was one thing I wished to have been different it would have been that you didn’t have to do that.’
Fresh tears welled up in her eyes. ‘My son, this thing that you speak of as a chore I did as an act of devotion. A daily prayer. Twice a day I cleaned you and as I did, I thanked God for that opportunity and begged him to grant me another day to show my love for you. Twice a day, every day, I prayed and God granted me the only things I have ever asked him from the day I found you. You are my life. Don’t you know, I would have done it ten times a
day without complaint.’
The boy cast his eyes downward and she caught his chin in her hand and raised it.
‘Don’t be ashamed. True love has no boundaries.’
His eyes seemed full of pain.
‘What is it, my heart?’
‘Nothing,’ he choked. ‘Whatever you may say I am glad you will be spared that chore. Thank you for everything you have ever done for me. I could never do enough to repay you.’
‘Seeing you like this is repayment enough.’
They spoke in hushed whispers, their heads close together. ‘What happened to the strange men who came to take you away? What did they want? What did they do?’ Sometimes she reached out and touched his face wonderingly. ‘I can’t believe it,’ she whispered. ‘After all these years.’ They had so much to talk about. They giggled at things. Suddenly she told him with some alarm, ‘I can’t seem to keep my eyes open. It’s not right, I feel it. I mustn’t sleep. Don’t let me sleep.’
And he saw that what she said was true, she could no longer keep awake. The more she tried to keep her eyes open the heavier they became. ‘It’s OK, Mum. Go to sleep. All will be well’
She gripped his arm hard; there was so much desperation in that grip.
‘I’ll always love you,’ he said.
She went to stand, but her body would not cooperate. She looked at him with fear. ‘Don’t let me sleep,’ she begged. ‘Don’t let me sleep. Please. Pass me that mug. Hurry, Black. I want to splash some water on my face.’
He turned to look at the mug and felt the grip of her hand on his arm slacken. By the time he turned his head to look at her she was already deeply asleep, her fingers trailing down his arm. He smiled gently at her sleeping form. ‘It’s OK, Mother. Sleep.’ With great care he lifted her leaning body and put her poor head on his lap. He watched her sleeping for a while, and then he extricated himself from under her and laid her head gently on a cushion. He lifted her feet up onto the sofa and when he was satisfied that she was as comfortable as he could make her he covered her with a blanket and stood looking down on her.