“Don’t even try to justify it. You knew who I was this whole time. Is this some sick, twisted joke?”
“No. Of course not. I should’ve been upfront from the beginning, but I had my reasons. If you just let me explain.”
“I don’t care about your excuses. They’re meaningless. Was I nothing but a charity case for you?”
“No, damn it.” I thrust my fingers through my hair. I really fucked this up. This is why I hate lying, even by omission. Nothing ever good comes from lying. Nothing. “You were never a charity case. It may have started as a favor to your husband, but that’s not how it ended. Believe me.”
“Tell me one thing. What was in it for you?”
The fact that I fell in love with you. You gave me a sense of belonging I’ve never felt anywhere since my mom died. These are all things I think but can’t voice. Not right now. Not this way. But bad timing doesn’t make them less real.
“Oh, wait. I think I know. Please leave.”
“Mackenzie, I—”
“Leave!”
I step back and run my hands down my face. I glance behind me at the two boys who are stone statues in the hallway. My heart drops as I take in their doe-eyed expression and . . . fear.
God, I’ve royally fucked up.
My entire body deflates. I should’ve seen this coming. And maybe I did, and that’s why I kept punting on telling her the truth. “I’ll leave.” I step through her door but stop short.
“I’m sorry, boys. I messed this up.”
“Will you be back?” The crack in Liam’s voice is like the final nail in my coffin.
I don’t know how to answer. I want to be truthful, but what even is the truth? I don’t know anymore. So I give them my most honest answer. “I hope so.”
“Boys, come here,” Mackenzie calls from her room. They keep their watchful eyes on me as they obey their mom. She gathers them into a group hug. I watch them wrap their arms around each other, and I’ve never felt so excluded in my life. Liam’s sad expression. Nick’s tear-streaked face. Makenzie’s hurt filled glare. It’s too much. I give her a nod and see my way out.
Once I’m back at my cottage, I grab Ethan’s letter. “Don’t worry if you fall in love with her. She’s easy to love.” Yeah, you dumb motherfucker. You knew exactly what you were doing.
I crack open a beer bottle and take a sip. There’s nothing better than drinking alone in your room and moping. Said no one ever.
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Mackenzie
“You know, he may have his reasons for not telling you. Did you even let him explain?” Jill asks.
Two days have passed since our argument. I’m not in any condition to listen to reasoning.
“There’s nothing to explain. I don’t like being lied to.” I watched my dad lie and use my mom enough times. I won’t tolerate it. The one good thing about Ethan, he wasn’t ever home long enough to lie to me, but he sure excelled in the using category. I maintained the perfect family for the short amount of time he was around.
“Still, people have their reasons. You should hear him out, in any case.”
“He knew Ethan. Not only knew him, but he was friends with him. Trust me. Ethan didn’t have many friends. Regardless, the man took care of my kids, spent countless hours with us, and never mentioned his connection. Not once! That hurts the most.”
“I know, honey, and I get it. It was wrong. But his reasoning may surprise you. You need to listen to him to make an informed decision.”
“Maybe eventually, but I need time to wrap my head around what he did first. Besides, dating him was supposed to be temporary. We both knew he would eventually leave.” The thing is, us being together didn’t feel temporary. It felt eternal. Like our previous baggage didn’t matter. There was an ease between us—a connection I hadn’t experienced with any other man. But there’s also the way he can turn me on by his intense stare alone. There’s no doubt my body craves him like a coffee addict craves caffeine, but I have to draw the line. I can’t risk burrowing down that hole any more than I already am. My brother is right. I shouldn’t have risked the kids getting so close or me.
The kids.
I’ve not seen them this sad since the military showed up at our doorstep to announce the devastating blow. But somehow, this seems worse, which I hate to admit. But Nate and the boys have spent so much time together. They miss him. And blame me for him not being around.
I can’t seem to do anything right.
My brother never trusted him from the beginning. I should’ve listened. As Jordan suggested, he may not have been after my money, but he gutted me just the same.
“How did you end things? Did you leave it open-ended so you can discuss this logically like an adult?”
I level her with a stare. “I pretty much told him to leave, and I never wanted to see him again.”
“Oh, honey.” She clicks her tongue. “Considering this is the second day he hasn’t been in to get his morning coffee, I’d say you got your wish.”
I groan. Jill has a point, and I hate how that makes me upset.
“Why don’t you take the rest of the day off. You definitely need it.”
“You don’t care?”
“Of course not. It’s a slow day, anyway.”
I don’t know what I’d do if I had any other boss. Jill’s been there at every turn for me ever since I returned to Sunnyville. I take off my smock and hang it on the peg. “I appreciate everything you’ve done for me. You know that, right?”
“That’s what old friends are for.”
“Even though I’ve been a pretty shitty friend throughout the years?”
Her face softens. “It’s hard keeping in touch when people move away. I never once complained. Here, bring these rolls to Liam. I know they’re his favorites.”
I smile. “I can pay for them.”
“No, they’re on the house.”
“Not happening. In fact, why don’t you get me a dozen and I’ll surprise the family with them. Stan loves them too.”
After Jill bags up the goodies, I hand her my debit card, relieved to have some money for once. It’s been a struggle trying to make ends meet, but I’ve been hanging in there. Having some breathing space is nice.
“There seems to be a problem with your card.”
“What?” My head snaps to Jill.
“It’s declined.”
Declined? My stomach drops. “That’s impossible.”
“I’ve run it through three times.”
My hands shake as I fumble for the phone and dial. “I’ll call the bank.”
After they confirm the zero balance, I hang up with tears in my eyes.
“It’s all gone.”
Jill gasps. I think she says something about calling Grant Malone, but I’m in a daze. It can’t be true. Can it? He wouldn’t.
But as my mind waffles over this information, I keep wondering who else could have drained my account?
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Nate
“So, tell me again why you didn’t just tell her the truth?” Mark eyes me over his big stack of pancakes. We met for breakfast for what was supposed to be a celebration, but the fiasco with Mackenzie dampened those spirits. After explaining my entire Dear John story, I’m sure he confirmed I’m a dumbass.
“I was carrying out Ethan’s wishes. He gave me specific instructions not to reveal my connection to them. At first, I thought I was doing the honorable thing.” Now, I realize how much of a mistake that was.
Mark’s shoulders shake as he picks up a sausage link and runs it through the syrup. “Ethan was always a sadistic son of a bitch.”
I stare at him, questioning what’s so funny. “What do you mean?”
He shoves the sausage in his mouth and shakes his head, still laughing. “Don’t you get it?”
Obviously, I’m missing something here. “Get what?”
“He knew you’d fall for her. This is his way of giving you an out or making you wor
k for it if that’s your wish.”
“You can’t possibly know that,” I scoff. He’s wrong. Isn’t he? Yeah, he’s totally wrong.
Don’t worry if you fall in love with her. She’s easy to love.
The line from his letter flashes through my mind. Surely, Ethan wouldn’t have thought that. I mean, it’s true. I can’t deny he’s right. Mackenzie is easy to love.
But I didn’t just fall in love with her. I fell in love with how she puts her kids before anything else. With the sexy way she smiles when she’s embarrassed. But most of all, I fell for the way she makes me content when I’m around her. She softens the hard edges I never thought would bend.
“Don’t I?” His eyebrow quirks as he drags another sausage link through the syrup. When I don’t say anything, he continues, “Look, I know my cousin. He was one hell of a jerk, but he loved Mackenzie in his own way. He just loved chasing the next adrenaline rush more. So yeah, I know he set you up to fail.”
Surrounding conversations fade into the background as my worst fear—the fear that Ethan would disapprove of Mackenzie and me together—surfaces.
“You don’t think he wants me to be with her?” In a sick sort of way, part of me had wished for his blessing—a justification for falling for my friend’s wife.
“I’m not saying that.” He shakes his head as if to emphasize his words. I wait for him to continue while he takes a drink of his orange juice. “It’s more like the opposite. He wants you to earn her. It’s easy to place yourself in the savior role—although he’s right. She wouldn’t have gone along—but he knew she could take care of herself. My guess is, he also knew there was a slight chance she would fall for you. So what better way than to stage it so she finds out, gets pissed, and then you have to earn her heart back.”
“That’s some fucked up shit right there.”
He throws his arms out wide. “As I said, a sadistic son of a bitch.”
“Well, if any of what you said is true, he got one thing right. I’m going to fight like hell for her.”
“Oh, I know. I have a hefty commission check to prove that.” He laughs. “But seriously, I’m sure Ethan’s counting on it.”
Chapter Forty
Mackenzie
“We traced the transfers from your account. But it wasn’t a single time. There have been several made—all under twenty dollars—for the past month until yesterday’s big withdraw.” Detective Malone’s deep voice rings through my ear.
I wrap an arm around my waist and stare out the front room window. His words hit home, but I want to reject them. How could I have been so blind? It’s my finances, for fuck’s sake.
“Can you tell where the transfers went and who requested them?”
“Have you ever heard of Plymouth Rolling Rock, Inc.?”
“Not that I’m aware of.”
“We’re looking into the company, but from what we’ve seen, it looks to be a shell corporation, or dummy corporation, if you will.”
“Who made these transfers?”
“We traced a few from your server, but all of them were from someone logging into your account. Who has had access to your computer and passwords?”
My mouth dries. I hate that Nate is the first person to come to mind. It’s hardly fair to him, but he’s the only one in my house all the time. And he used my laptop the other morning.
No. No. No. That’s impossible. It couldn’t possibly be him. Could it?
God, the idea of him betraying us makes me physically ill.
“Ms. Gillman.”
“Yeah, I’m sorry. The only person in my house recently is Nate Dixon.” As soon as I say his name, I wish I could take it back. The admission seems like a betrayal. It can’t possibly be him. I come to his defense. “But there’s no probable cause. He has money.”
“He’s the surgeon who helped save Liam, right?”
Sadness grips my gut and squeezes tightly. Nate’s done so much for our family. I thought he had cared. Like care cared. I think that’s what hurts the worst. I thought we had more between us than his obligated duty to my deceased husband. I’ve lived a life of obligation. Over a decade, to be exact. I won’t backtrack. I want a man who loves me for me, not one born from duty.
“Yes, but I don’t think he’d have anything to do with it.”
“We’ll question him. If he cooperates, we won’t bring him in. Also, do you know anyone who would’ve traveled to San Francisco recently?”
Cotton mouth. Or sandpaper. Either term describes my mouth’s parched state. I can barely say his name. “Only Nate.”
“Hmm.”
“Honestly, it can’t be him.”
“Well, as I said, we’ll question him. In the meantime, try to think of anyone else who’d have access to your computer.”
Movement outside my window catches my attention. The couple across the street pushes the baby stroller from around the house. The woman glances up at her husband, wearing a wide smile. There’s a sparkle in her eyes. He returns the look with a warm smile. That, right there, is what I want. Not the baby part, but the obvious love and adoration. Jesus, why is that so hard to find?
“I will. Thanks, Grant. I appreciate everything you’re doing,” I say, forcing my attention back to the phone.
“I’ll call you after we speak with Nate.”
We hang up. I continue to watch the happy family make their way down the sidewalk. There’s nothing wrong with being single. But I’m so tired. For once, I wish a relationship would work.
Chapter Forty-One
Nate
“Thanks for letting me extend my time when I needed to,” I say to the owner of The Cottages in appreciation. Her wide eyes blink up at me, not holding back her surprise. I think I’ve stunned her into submission. Admittedly, this is the most I’ve ever spoken to her. But I wanted to make sure she knew I appreciated her help.
“It’s no problem. We don’t start booking solid until next week,” Mrs. Overly finally says. Then she shakes her head as if she can’t believe she’s talking to me. Am I that hard to take? I realize she’s used to my gruff exterior, but I didn’t think I was that bad. “You’re a quiet one. I admit I had reservations about you in the beginning. But if you ever need a place to stay in Sunnyville, be sure to look us up.”
Giving my key ring a jingle, I say, “I’ve got it taken care of, but thanks for the offer.”
“Does that mean you’ll be staying in Sunnyville permanently?”
“Why, Mrs. Overly, I didn’t know you cared.” I give her a wink and back away from the counter. She blushes, but I’m not about to answer her question. I’m well aware of her direct connection to the gossip chain.
“Okay, when you leave, just lay the key on the table. No need to turn it in.”
“Thanks again.” I trek across the lawn to my cottage. I hope buying a house in Sunnyville shows how committed I am to our relationship. Maybe then she’ll realize how serious I am about her and the boys. I’ve never had a family to fight for before. I once told her I never found that one special place to live and call home. But I was looking at things all wrong. Home isn’t a location. Home is the people you surround yourself with. And I want to surround myself with Mackenzie, Liam, and Nick.
Opening the door to the rental cottage, I scan the room. The few boxes I took the time to unpack have already been repacked, taped, and stacked. My work basically consists of moving them to my new house.
My new house.
Christ.
It still hasn’t quite sunk in.
I’m carrying the last box out when a couple of men wearing suits walk up. I recognize one immediately.
“Nate Dixon, right?”
“That would be me.”
“We met the other night at Hooligan’s. Detective Malone.”
“Yeah, I remember.” I walk to the truck and place the box inside. His partner gives my boxes a once-over.
“You plan on leaving town?” he asks.
I narrow my eyes at both men. “Is
there a problem?”
Detective Malone gives his partner a look that says back down. I want to ask if I’ll be on the receiving end of the good cop-slash-bad-cop routine, but Grant’s partner doesn’t look as if he has a sense of humor. I get the feeling I’m already pushing my luck, and I don’t even know what’s going on.
“Can you answer some questions?”
“Okay, but mind telling me what this is all about? Is someone hurt or in trouble?” My defenses go on high alert. “Are Mackenzie and the boys okay?”
“It’s nothing serious. Just need to ask a few things.”
* * *
Well, that was brutal.
The taillights disappear down the deserted street as I stare after them in disbelief. I, Colonel Nathanial Dixon-Anders, was interrogated by local detectives. Part of me wants to rush straight to Mackenzie and check to make sure she’s okay, while the stubborn side wants to head straight out of town and never look back. Option B isn’t realistic, not now, but she actually suspected me of stealing. Me. A special ops doctor.
What the hell?
After everything we’ve done together, I don’t know whether to be hurt or pissed. Right now, the fact Mackenzie didn’t trust me hurts more than anything. But I need to see if she’s okay financially.
Grant mentioned Plymouth Rolling Rock, Inc. Why does that sound so familiar? I shelve that thought for later. First, I need to find her brother. If some random foreigners had hacked her account, then I wouldn’t be so suspicious, but I can think of only one other person who had access to her computer. And don’t think I held back in letting the detectives know that information.
Ten minutes later, I find myself on the porch of Mrs. Turner’s house.
“Nate, I’m surprised to see you.” She looks nervously behind her. “Mackenzie isn’t here.”
A clatter of feet come trampling across the floor. Nick springs from behind his grandma and bounces on his heels. At least someone is happy to see me.
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