Come-By

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I was fortunate enough to spend the first thirty years of my life in the English Lake District. I find Lake District books a bit boring which is why I like to write them in this caricature style which is a lot more interesting and entertaining (I find ... you get the info plus the fun). Much more interesting. Enjoy the ditty. It isn’t very long, but I know how to use it.I was fortunate enough to spend the first thirty years of my life in the English Lake District. I hung out with the sheep farmers in the hills, shot clay pigeons and stray farm hands on their land, told and listened to stories in the pubs. Joss Naylor, an old mate of mine who is in this story would probably laugh his head off at it, after all, he was involved in the World’s Biggest Liar competition. I say probably because there is always the hope that he might sue me and do me a favour by dragging my name through the silage using some hick Lawyer who represented the alleged guilty in the Texas chainsaw incident. I find Lake District books a bit boring which is why I like to write them in this caricature style which is a lot more interesting and entertaining (I find ... you get the info plus the fun). As you reach the top of Hardknott pass, you can turn and look back down at Eskdale Grike and Gragley Rock. It is a fine example of a glacial groove Zzzzzzz!My version: As you reach the top of Hardknott, you can turn and look back down to Eskdale Grike and Gragley Rock ... and see a ‘black magically’ given life, Swiss Army sheep keyring featuring a deadly bottle opener, a knife and something for getting sheep out of Chelsea Tractor wheel arches. It was lost by a tourist, found and energised by a Warlock sheep farmer ... it’s heading YOUR way! Soon you will be in the hands of Lake District Pagans, and later that day, campers on the lower lands will say ‘Wow! Look at that fire on top of Hardknott!’Much more interesting. Enjoy the ditty. It isn’t very long, but I know how to use it.And, if you ever catch Joss Naylor rooting through your bins ... please tell him.