Finding Unity

by Ripley Proserpina

  It was in the back of the restaurant, kitty corner to Congregation Street. It was quieter here, a little more private, and perfect for what he wanted to do.

  Hours passed, and it seemed like minutes. He told her everything—from boarding school to Montreal. He didn’t leave out a single detail. As he spoke, Nora filled in her own history. They existed in a cocoon of honesty and revelations. She laid herself as bare to him as he did.

  “We lived such different lives on the surface,” she said, swirling the ice in her glass as she glanced up at him beneath her eyelashes. It had gotten darker and the bistro had lowered their lights and lit a candle on their table. Around them, the raised voices of other diners only made their table feel more like an island. “But we were both so lonely. I think of that a lot, you know. All of you had what on the surface appeared to be busy, fulfilling lives before you found each other, but there’s this thread of loneliness that ran through each of your pasts. Like you were searching for something and you didn’t find it until you found each other.”

  “I didn’t even know I was looking,” Seok admitted.

  “Neither did I,” she answered. They held hands and she pulled his knuckles to her lips and kissed him. “Until I found you—or landed in your lives with a crash.”

  Yeah. Her arrival in his life hadn’t been easy, and it had been momentous. It had shifted the earth and changed the direction his life was headed.

  “I don’t know—if it wasn’t for you—if I’d be able to say no to my father, the way I’m determined to say no, now.”

  She scoffed. “You came to Vermont with nothing except Matisse. You were strong before I met you. That doesn’t come from me.”

  No. But because of her he had more to fight for. Always at the back of his mind was the idea that his friendship couldn’t go on forever the way it was. And he wanted it to. His friends were the family he made, the people who understood him and started to fill a hole in his heart.

  Then Nora came and like a miracle, he was whole.

  “The more I’m with you, the clearer everything gets.” He leaned over the table to kiss her. She smoothed her hand down his cheek, holding him to her as she returned it. “I love you,” he said, sitting down.

  “I love you, too.” Her eyes crinkled at the sides. The shadows made her hair appear longer, like the way it was when they first met. She was beautiful no matter what her hair looked like, but he had the sense that if he stared at her long enough, he’d be able to watch her evolve right before his eyes.

  He wanted that. He wanted to see Nora in all her iterations. Taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly, he gathered himself. “I want you to marry me.”

  Her hand squeezed his so tightly he winced. “What?”

  “Nora. I love you. I’ll love you for the rest of our lives. I want you to be my wife.”

  Her mouth dropped open. “Seok—”

  He could hear her arguments before he made them. They’d only known each other for a handful of months, and in that time, they’d dealt with one crisis after another. They should talk to the other guys first because this was a decision that impacted all of them. They should talk about money, hopes, dreams, plans, kids.

  “We all want to marry you. Now or in a year from now, or ten years from now, you’re it for us. Maybe I should have done this with everyone here so you could hear them for yourself, but this is between us. You and me. This is how I feel about you and what I want. I’ll marry you at the courthouse or with a pledge right now.” Nerves he hadn’t had suddenly made his breath catch. What if he was wrong? What if she—

  “I want to be yours. I am yours.”

  He pushed back his chair, rounding the table until he could lift her into his arms and press his mouth to hers. Her tongue dove into his mouth, tasting like the strawberries they’d shared, and he had to swallow a groan. Cupping her face, he felt her cheeks swell with her smile and now he tasted her happiness, too. He pulled away. “I need you to say it. Say you’ll be my wife. Whatever that looks like.” He pinned her with a stare, studying her for any sign of doubt, any sign that she was doing this because he wanted it, and not because it was what she felt.

  “I want to be your wife.” She laughed, the sound cutting through the noise around them. “I want you forever. I love you.”

  “Are you worried about telling the guys?” Nora asked as they drove back home.

  It was a reasonable question. He’d taken a step forward without asking the others, but he knew what their responses would be so— “No.”

  “Really?”

  He glanced over. Her hands were clasped tightly in her lap as she stared at him. “I’m really not. They’ll be fine.”

  She turned to the window. If this had happened before the accident at Thanksgiving, maybe he’d be concerned about Apollo, but not now. He had a feeling that the others would take the opportunity to lay their hearts on the line for her.

  “The only thing I’m worried about is agreeing on an engagement ring.”

  “What?” She burst out laughing. When she spoke again, her voice had taken on a smooth, slightly sarcastic tone. “Are you telling me with five fiancés, I only get one ring?”

  He chuckled, reached over for her hand, and brought it to his lips. “Tiny hands. You think you can put five rings on one finger?”

  She touched his lips with her fingertips as if she were kissing him. “I’m joking.” Sighing, she linked her fingers with his. “I hope they’re not hurt. That’s the only thing I worry about. I don’t want anyone to feel left out.”

  “Think about how everyone has been these last months. No one is going to be jealous. No one is going to be hurt. If Ryan had asked you first, I’d have been happy for you. I’d also have begun planning my own proposal immediately. Make sure it lived up to, if not exceeded his.”

  “Ah.” She lifted his hand to her lips and kissed it. “Your goal was to set the bar.”

  “No matter what I did, I’d win because I went first,” he joked.

  She tossed his hand away, then laughing, gathered it back. “Hilarious.”

  The lights were all on, but the curtains were shut tight against the night. As he pulled the car into the driveway, he glanced up at one of the cameras, noting the little red dot that indicated it was recording.

  Parking the car, he noticed Nora staring at the same spot. “I hope we won’t need those for long.”

  So did he.

  “I forgot to tell you that Serena from Newsline called me again. She said the story went in a different direction, and she wanted to give me the chance to watch it. See what I thought, and then decide if I wanted to talk to her. Or be interviewed or whatever.”

  If he were honest, he didn’t want to think about media exposure on the night of his engagement. All he wanted was to make his announcement to his friends, accept their congratulations, and hustle Nora into bed. But that could wait in the face of her need to talk.

  He leaned back in the seat, shifting until he could see her. “What do you think?”

  There was a flash of white teeth as she smiled. “Guiding me, Obi-Wan?”

  “No.” He didn’t hold the answers to anything.

  She sighed. “I don’t know. I think I should watch it. Go from there.”

  “Did she send it to you?”

  The front door opened, and Apollo walked through, closing it behind him. It was chilly now that the sun went down, so he stuffed his hands in his pockets.

  “We’ll talk inside,” Seok said, pushing open the door.

  Nora opened her door as well, but before she could go through, he grabbed her hand, tugged her back, and kissed her again. “You said yes.”

  He couldn’t see it, but he imagined her blushing when she answered. “I did.”

  Chapter 30

  Nora

  How do I do this?

  Apollo jogged to her, face alight. As soon as he could reach her, he swept her into his arms and kissed her. “Missed you, baby girl.”

  She hugge
d his neck tight. “I missed you, too. Did you eat?” Before they left, they’d ordered a couple of appetizers and plates to-go. It had been her idea, mostly because she felt guilty leaving the guys with leftovers when she got a steak.

  “Yes,” he answered, kissing her ear. He leaned toward the backseat. “But I can always eat. What did you bring?”

  “Fried pickles, salad, spring rolls, and a pizza.” Nora listed the items off as Seok took them out.

  “Yum,” he answered, leading her toward the house. “It was my night, and I went shopping, but somehow ended up with ten different leafy greens and a bottle of Worcestershire sauce.”

  Nora laughed. Shopping with Apollo was always interesting. He tended to buy whatever caught his attention rather than ingredients for a meal. He never left out the greens, though. Somehow those were always on hand, ready to be added into a smoothie.

  “So what did you have?” she asked as he opened the door for her.

  “Pasta,” he answered, “with spinach and olive oil. It was good.”

  “It was adequate.” Matisse appeared from the dining room. He was wearing a tuxedo vest over a sleeveless t-shirt and a pair of jeans she wouldn’t have been able to squeeze one leg in. “How was your date, chére?”

  “I proposed,” Seok said.

  Matisse and Apollo froze. After a long moment of silence, Matisse suddenly yelled, “Ryan! Cai! Get down here!”

  Footsteps thundered from rooms and the two men pounded down the stairs. “What is it?”

  “Bastard did it first,” Matisse replied. “J’accuse!” He pointed a finger at Seok. “Took her out and proposed.” Narrowing his eyes, he took a step toward the man and whispered, “Game on.”

  So Tisse was okay. But what about the other three men she loved? Cai was like a stone, hand gripping the railing as he studied them. Ryan was thoughtful, head canted to one side, green eyes serious, and Apollo…

  His beautiful brown eyes were wide, suddenly filled with tears. He took her from Tisse and held her so tightly she could barely breathe. “What did you say?” His voice was quiet, just for her to hear.

  Turning her head, she kissed his earlobe and then his dimple. “Of course I said yes. I’ll always say yes.” Did he understand what he meant? If any of them asked her to be theirs, she was a sure thing. A foregone conclusion. “I’m yours,” she went on, “if you want me.”

  She stroked her hands up his strong back, noting the way his body trembled and how tense his muscles were. In a rush, he pushed her away from him and bounded upstairs.

  Oh, God.

  Her knees went weak, but she made a move to follow him. Cai stopped her though with a soft smile. “No,” he said. “Wait.”

  Nu-uh. No way. She wasn’t going to let there be a misunderstanding between her and Apollo ever again.

  She pushed back Seok, who put a hand on her arm, to bound up after him, taking the steps two at a time. If he weren’t beyond angry, Apollo would be really impressed with her.

  Jogging to his room, she imagined what it was she would say to him to make him understand. She’d barely touched the doorknob before his door swung open and she ran into his chest.

  “Oomph.”

  He cupped her elbows, steadying her before stepping away. “I was coming right back.”

  “This doesn’t mean I love you less!” It burst out of her. She rested her hands on either side of his face to keep him from looking away. “I love you with my whole heart.”

  Understanding blossomed on his face and he wrenched her to him. “Baby girl, I know. I’ve just been waiting for months and months, and with Seok asking, I couldn’t wait anymore.” He kissed the top of her head and suddenly dropped to his knees.

  This was the first time she’d ever looked down at him and her breath caught in her throat. “Apollo.”

  He held a gold ring in his hand. The band was worn, thinned, and the gold smoothed to a pale yellow. “This was my dad’s signet ring.”

  She could make out the shape of an M.

  “And it was his grandfather’s,” he went on. “I thought about an engagement ring, but whatever we do will be unique. Only ours, and since I might not be able to give you my name, legally, I wanted a different way for my name to be on you.”

  He slid the ring on her ring finger, but it was too big, so he took it off and slid it onto her middle finger. It was perfect.

  “Nora Leslie. Be my wife. My partner. My best friend. Forever.”

  Was this really happening? Apollo watched her, not a shred of uncertainty on his face. He was all contained happiness, just waiting for an excuse to let it out.

  She held her hand out, taking in the golden M set against an onyx and nodded. The tears she hadn’t shed with Seok suddenly choked her, but she got it out. “Yes, Apollo. I’ll be your wife.”

  He exploded into motion, lifting her off her feet and plunging his tongue into her mouth. Behind her, Ryan started laughing and there was a bunch of clapping. Apollo swung her, still kissing her while her feet dangled against his knees. When he finally stopped, he spun her to face the others.

  Each of them wore matching smiles. Cai was the first to take her. His kiss was gentle and chaste, a quick slide of his lips on her cheek until he reached her ear. “You won’t mind if I save our moment for another day?”

  The hair on her arms lifted at the promise in his voice and she shook her head. Turning quickly, she was able to get in one kiss before Matisse had her.

  “Chére, any proposal of mine will be trop—too much. It will require planning and preparation.”

  “No doubt,” she answered. “But Tisse…” She glanced at Ryan and Cai to encompass what she wanted to say. “I don’t want you to think I expect—”

  Ryan was the one to cut her off. He kissed her as Matisse held her. “We all have our own ways.”

  “We’re in no hurry,” Cai added. “Apollo can put his name on you, and you can carry Seok’s last name, but you’re as much mine as any of theirs. Know that.”

  And like she one day imagined promising them, she answered, “I do.”

  It was Apollo, Seok, Cai, Ryan, and Matisse’s promises to her that made her call Serena. She had five men counting on her, committing themselves to her, and she owed it to them to have her shit sorted.

  Serena answered on the first ring, and when Nora told her she’d like to see what she had—and that she was considering the offer to be interviewed—the other woman couldn’t keep the breathless excitement from her voice.

  Her phone dinged with the email alert before she’d even hung up.

  Seok and Apollo had surprised her by going downstairs with Ryan, Cai, and Matisse and leaving her on her own. But then she imagined they all needed to talk about what had transpired tonight, and it made sense. Now, it gave her the time to see what Serena had and process it.

  “Rough cut,” a man’s voice said as the video started and a montage of photos began to appear on the screen like snapshots being dropped into a pile.

  The images sucked her into the past. It started with a photo of Reid well before she met him. He had a gap-toothed smile and was held in the arms of a woman who had to be his mother, they resembled each other so closely.

  Then came her and Reid, arms around each other’s shoulders, sparklers in their free hands. She remembered that day. Her foster parents had a Fourth of July celebration every year. That picture was Reid’s junior year, and God, how old was she? Fourteen? Fifteen?

  But she was smiling and that was a pretty rare occurrence back then.

  The still-photos disappeared, and a face Nora hadn’t expected came into focus.

  “I wasn’t a good mother—I wasn’t even a fair mother. I was addicted and my focus was only on getting drugs. Nora’s dad, he tried his best, but as soon as he’d start to feel better, he’d stop taking his medication, and then I’d spiral, and before I knew it, she was back in the system.”

  “How long have you been clean?” a voice asked.

  Nora’s mother, her e
yes clear even though she looked decades older than her chronological age, smiled. “I have my ninety-day chip. But I think this time I’m ready to stay clean. Something feels different.”

  “What do you think when you look at this?” the same voice asked and the video cut away to another interview her mother had done, this one from back in October.

  When Mom spoke, her words were slurred and gaze unfocused. “She got me arrested, got herself put in foster care. Probably pregnant with that guy’s baby. Thought she was better than everyone.” As she spoke, she leaned forward and her eyes began to close.

  “It’s horrifying,” Mom answered when the camera focused on her again. “Where’d you get that? It wasn’t what ran on TV.”

  “No.” The camera zoomed back to reveal the man who Frank had gone gaga over at the comic shop. His stare was cold and hard as he spoke, “Your interview was cut and pasted together so it looked like this.”

  The scene ran again, and Nora recognized it as what had been on the local news station. In this piece, her mom’s voice overlayed a series of pictures of Reid and Nora.

  “It’s not true.” Mom sighed. “I hope someday she’ll forgive me, but right now I have to get myself in order. I’m no good to anyone when I’m using.”

  Someone could have knocked her down with a feather. In all the times her mom had gotten clean, she’d never said anything like that. A shimmer of hope appeared. If this was just the beginning of what Serena had done, what did the rest of this interview look like?

  Over an hour passed in the blink of an eye. Not only did Serena—or Kenneth—interview people from her and Reid’s past, but they even interviewed Tyler’s family, and Tilly’s—the girl who’d thrown herself from the window of Converse Hall.

  “In an effort to present a balanced story, we did try to interview Dr. Daniel Murray. His lawyer let us know that, because of pending charges, he wouldn’t speak to us. However, much of what Dr. Murray has done—his career and his own schooling—is public record. We’ve spoken to former commanding officers and colleagues in order to shape a picture of the man who has only recently been vilified by the public, and this is what we’ve come to learn. Dr. Daniel Murray went to Vermont’s premier military academy and graduated as an officer. After one tour in Iraq, he returned to Vermont and got his doctorate in psychology. His employment is fuzzy after that, though his research was funded by the Department of Defense and was completed while on tour in Afghanistan. It appears some of his subjects were inmates at Guantanamo, and that after leaving there and going to Syria, he brought with him Reid Merchant, the same young man who later attacked students at Alexander Twilight High School. Lucy Merrill, the reporter who broke this story joins us to tell us more about what—on the surface—seems to be a man whose patriotism has been at the fore.”