Pained

by Vera Hollins

  The world might be black and filled with sadness, but nothing mattered when we had each other. Together we would conquer it all.

  Chapter 25

  “MR. BLACK.” THE NURSE peered into my room. “Visiting hours ended a long time ago. Please, leave the room.”

  He rolled his eyes. “Relax. I’m not going to set this place on fire.”

  I giggled, more than amused. He’d been with me the whole day, refusing to be separated from me, which helped me cope with the nightmare of the last two days. I didn’t want him to go.

  “Please,” I told her. “Let him stay just a few more minutes.”

  She sighed and looked between us, wearing an expression of reluctance on her aged face. “All right, I’ll let him stay, but only because you’re so sweet and you asked nicely. Five minutes, Mr. Black.” She cast him a stern look and closed the door behind her.

  He rolled his eyes again. “She’s bitchy. She clearly needs sex.”

  My eyes widened, and I poked his shoulder. “Hayden! Stop being so rude!”

  He grabbed my finger and nipped it. “Stop being a grandma.” He laughed one of his rare laughs.

  His laugh. I was addicted to it. I needed him to laugh and be happy. I returned his jolly smile.

  The day had passed in a blur. The ambulance arrived when we reached the cabin this morning, and my mother and I were transferred to the hospital. They took care of my arm and did some tests to determine if I’d suffered a concussion or had internal bleeding, but I didn’t have any serious injuries beside a mild concussion and the graze wound. I was astounded by my luck. If only that bullet had gone a few inches to the left, I would more than likely be dead.

  As for my mother, she had delayed internal bleeding, and she’d undergone surgery for her broken kneecaps. She was currently under observation in another room, and I had yet to see her.

  The surprise of the day came in the form of the reporters, who had heard about the kidnapping and wanted to get the scoop. They arrived soon after the cops left. I was shocked to hear they wanted to interview me, but I refused to see them because media attention was the last thing I wanted in this moment. Thankfully, Mrs. Black managed to get them out of the hospital before they barged into my room and evaded my privacy.

  “This is like a déjà vu.”

  “What exactly?” he asked.

  “I’m in the hospital with you next to me. I hope it won’t become a habit,” I said, attempting a lame joke with a smile, but the smile didn’t reach my eyes. Even though we acted casually, both of us were aware of just how close I was to dying, again.

  It was all thanks to Hayden that I was here now. He knew something was wrong when I hadn’t texted him back or answered his calls, and he tried to reach me in all ways he could after he saw I never got back home. He contacted the police, and they located my phone where Brad knocked me out.

  Brad was his first suspect, so he’d gone to look for Coach Benner. He hadn’t been home, so Hayden was only able to track him down yesterday, on Saturday, and he forced him to tell him where his brother was.

  The coach claimed he didn’t know anything, but after Hayden, Blake, and Masen threatened to send him to the hospital if he didn’t tell them the truth, he gave out the information about the cabin that the Benner family owned in the forest near Hartford. He couldn’t confirm if his brother was there, but he said Brad had mentioned going there sometime in the future.

  It was a long shot, but luckily, it paid off, and Hayden, along with Blake, Masen, and the police, managed to arrive in time.

  They got to the cabin soon after I ran off to the woods. I hadn’t imagined the sounds of car engines I heard. They belonged to them. My mother told them I’d run out with Brad chasing after me, and Hayden rushed out to search for me, cold-shouldering the cops who told him to stay put. He managed to pinpoint my direction thanks to the gunshots, miraculously reaching us before Brad could make a fatal shot.

  “Thank you for everything, Hayden. If it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t be here now.”

  He smiled and caressed my cheek. “You’ve already told me that a few times today. It’s fine, really.”

  “I still can’t believe you threatened the coach.” I shook my head. “Would you have really hurt him if he hadn’t said anything?” I asked, although I already knew the harsh truth. He would.

  He looked at me for a long time, not even blinking. “I would do anything for you, and I wouldn’t even regret it.”

  My pulse throbbed. “But Hayden, he did nothing and—”

  “If he’d covered for him, he would’ve been Brad’s accomplice, and that is hardly nothing. It doesn’t matter now, Sarah. All that matters is that you’re safe.” His eyes grew a shade darker when they focused on the bruise on my jaw. “I just regret not sending that shithead to the ER. Fuck. I wanted to tear him apart.”

  “No. Don’t say that. You did more than enough. You’ve been there for me, which was all I needed. He’s in jail, so it doesn’t matter. I’m okay.”

  His fingers found my bandaged wrist and caressed it gently, creating flutters in my stomach. I looked at my phone that was on the bedside table. Various cracks covered the whole screen. I was surprised it hadn’t broken in pieces.

  Hayden noticed me looking at it. “You should get rid of it. It’s old and completely damaged.”

  “Yeah, I know, but it’s not like I have money to buy a new one. I guess I’d have to take more money from my college savings—”

  “I’ll buy it for you,” he said, completely serious.

  I gaped at him. “What? No, you won’t.”

  “Yes, I will. I can easily afford it, so it’s nothing—”

  “Hayden.” I put my hand over his firmly. “I don’t want you to buy me a new phone, all right? It’s not okay to receive such an expensive thing from you, and I wouldn’t feel comfortable about it at all.”

  “But—”

  “Please. Don’t.” My eyes were pleading him, trying to convey to him just how much I was against it. “Please.”

  He sighed, shaking his head. “Fine. I don’t understand why, because it’s really nothing, but okay. If you don’t want it, then I won’t do it.”

  I was grateful that he respected my feelings about this. “Thank you. You know, I’m not materialistic. The poem and art supplies you gave me are the best gifts I’ve ever received. They mean more to me than anything. More than any phone in this world.”

  I couldn’t look away from his lips that quirked up in a dazzling smile. “So you want me to write you poems?”

  My heart swelled at the thought. “I would love that.” I blushed. I didn’t want him to think I expected it from him. “But of course, you don’t have to,” I blurted out.

  He chuckled and kissed my hand. “I’m not a flowers and teddy bear type of guy, Sarah. If you expect that, I’m going to disappoint you.”

  “I don’t expect anything. I love you just the way you are.”

  His smoldering eyes captured me, making breathing a difficult task. “Do you have any idea just how much I love you?”

  His lips claimed mine, capturing me in a rush of pleasure, and I dug my fingers into his waist to keep him closer. I was addicted to his kisses, craving for much more as he explored me with urgent need. He traced my neck with his fingers. His fluttery touch sent my heart into overdrive, and I leaned my head backward to allow him better access.

  His soft lips lowered to my neck, devouring me in their journey across my sensitive skin. “Your kisses are the best thing I’ve ever experienced,” he murmured. I was breathing unevenly, and my whole body was restless, coated in lust. He pulled away from me moments later, making me crave him even more. “You feel too good.”

  I brushed my hand across the hard ridges of his arm, relishing the strength of his taut muscles underneath my palm, and caught his hand. “Just like you. Whenever you kiss me I can’t think of anything but how good it feels.”

  “I feel the same. Your kiss is one of the rare moments
when I can completely relax and just feel... Blissfully happy.”

  I smiled broadly. He could always make me melt so easily.

  “I don’t want you to go,” I admitted to him.

  He kissed my palm, his lips trailing over my skin tantalizingly slowly. “I’ll stay. I don’t care what they say, though I’m sure Carmen can give that permission or whatever.”

  “No, it’s okay, Hayden. Go home. You need to rest. You didn’t even eat the whole day and you look exhausted. I wouldn’t feel okay if you couldn’t get proper rest.”

  “I don’t care about that. I need to be with you—”

  “But I care about that. I care about you. I need to be with you too, but I also need you to take care of your health. Don’t worry, we’ll see each other soon. In a less than a day.” I cracked a smile.

  “It honestly feels like an eternity for me.”

  My phone beeped with a new message, and the reply died on my lips. I saw Mel’s name on the screen.

  “I have to text Jess and Mel. They’re really worried about me.”

  After the police gave me my phone back, I found many missed calls and texts from them. They wanted to know if I was okay and why I wasn’t answering them.

  I took my phone and opened Mel’s message.

  “Sar, seriously. Are you alive? Well, if you weren’t, you wouldn’t be reading this of course, but you get the point. Unless you’re a ghost by now, PLEASE ANSWER ME.”

  I couldn’t help but smile, despite her worry.

  The door opened again, and the nurse marched inside. “Mr. Black. Out. Now.”

  He snorted and raised his eyebrow at her. “You missed your calling. You should’ve been a bouncer.” His eyes scanned her slowly. “You already have muscles for that, and you’re almost bald.”

  I wanted to slap my forehead, growing red. She certainly had burly physique, her muscled arms flexing as she put her hands on her hips and glared at him, but calling her low cut hair “almost bald” was pushing it.

  “Okay, smartass. Either you’re out, or I’ll call security.”

  He heaved a long sigh and stood up, amused with the whole situation. He grasped my hand. “I’ll come back tomorrow morning.”

  “But you have school.”

  “Fuck school. As I said, I need to be with you, and I don’t want you to be all alone here.”

  Melting once more, I smiled at him and kissed him goodbye. I felt the same. Each moment with him stole more of my heart. I was so happy, and it was a new kind of happiness that was different from everything I’d experienced before. He was my anchor, my solid piece of ground in the middle of a turbulent sea, and there was nothing better than him being happy next to me.

  I couldn’t wait to see him again. I was completely addicted to my daily dose of Hayden Black.

  “DON’T WORRY, SARAH. I won’t let those reporters disturb you anymore,” Carmen told me, listening to my lungs.

  One of them had entered my room as soon as I woke up and started bombarding me with questions, but Carmen flew in with the security and threw him out.

  “I’m repulsed by such behavior. They’re sharks with no shame or limits.”

  I shrugged, breathing in and out as she moved the chestpiece of the stethoscope across my chest. She took out the earpieces and scribbled something on her clipboard.

  “How are you feeling?”

  “A little bit tired, but I’m okay. I couldn’t sleep much last night.”

  Her eyebrows furrowed, and her worried eyes skimmed over my face. “It’s understandable. After all, you went through a lot these last few days. If you want, I can send our psychologist so you can talk with her. She can help you deal with trauma.”

  I appreciated her offer, but I hated psychologists. I didn’t feel comfortable discussing my issues with them as they scrutinized me. I always felt unnerved under their fixed stares, and opening up would bring me more stress than relief. I just needed time to cope with this.

  “Thank you, but that won’t be needed. I’ll be better soon.”

  She examined me in silence. Her expression told me she disagreed with me, but she nodded. “Okay. If you ever change your mind, don’t hesitate to tell me.”

  “Sure.”

  “Then I’ll be going. I’ll come back later to check up on you. So far you’re good, Sarah.”

  “Thank you.”

  My phone beeped on the bedside table. A goofy smile came to my face when I saw Hayden’s name. He’d already sent me a few messages, which made me feel giddy, my heart speeding up in anticipation and love each time I saw his name on the screen.

  “I’ll be there in twenty.”

  I looked at Mrs. Black, who eyed me curiously. “I’m so grateful to Hayden,” I told her. I wanted her to know just how special her son was. “If it wasn’t for him, I wouldn’t be here now.”

  Her smile increased. Her eyes shone with pride, but there was also concern. She crossed her hands in front of her. “I don’t know what to say. Of course, I’m glad you’re safe now, and what Hayden did was noble and brave, but as his mother I can’t help but feel he should’ve let the police handle the situation. He could’ve gotten himself killed.”

  I understood her feelings because I felt the same. If Hayden hadn’t had the element of surprise, which allowed him to hit Brad before he could react, maybe things would’ve been different.

  “This is all the more reason why I can’t even express in words how I feel about him.” I felt a ripple of courage as I looked her back in the eyes, ignoring the redness of my cheeks. I needed to tell her I wasn’t going anywhere. “I love Hayden. I don’t want to give up on him—on us. He’s stronger than you think, and I always want to be there for him and help him overcome his weakness and insecurities. He can achieve so much if only he had us by his side, through good and bad times.”

  Her face held many emotions as she looked at me, absorbed in her thoughts. Her lips gradually curved into a grateful smile.

  “Thank you, Sarah. I feel happy but also ashamed. I’ve misjudged you. You aren’t weak. You’re far from it, and the way you look when you talk about my son...” She pressed her hand against her chest, trying to contain her tears. “It makes me so happy. This is what he needs. He needs understanding. He needs someone who won’t run away or judge him when obstacles come.”

  My throat was clogged, relief washing over me. She accepted me. She accepted us.

  She took my hand into hers. “I apologize for saying you aren’t the person for him. It wasn’t a right thing to say. I should have believed in Hayden and you more.” She blinked away her tears. “I believe he can get much better with you next to him. You two can do it. It will be difficult, and he will regress many times, but I’ll be there for both of you. And I want you to know you’re always welcome in our house.”

  I was shocked, unsure of how to answer to this, but before I had a chance to, a loud knock came at the door.

  “Yes?”

  The door opened to reveal Mel and Jess, and I gasped with surprise.

  “Sar!” they said almost simultaneously, their worried faces lightening the moment they saw me. They rushed inside with broad smiles, both carrying cute yellow “Get well” balloons.

  My eyes darted to the wheelchair behind them... Jonathan! I grinned, joy permeating me at seeing them here. It was Monday morning, and Mel and Jess were supposed to be at school but—

  Mateo entered last, and I lost my train of thought. I couldn’t move as blush covered my cheeks, our gazes locking. I never expected to see him like this. My eyes traced the lines of his tired face, which was leaner than usual, with faint shadows beneath his eyes that testified to a sleepless night.

  My heart clenched, and I looked away, unable to endure that look in his eyes anymore. The affection in them brought my guilt back to the surface, telling me he was far from moving on with his life, but then everything came to a halt in me when I thought about Hayden. He was about to come soon, and Mateo was here. I didn’t want him to get the
wrong idea.

  “Good morning,” Carmen greeted them, already on her way out. She winked at me. “This is just what our girl needs.” Her eyes remained on Mateo a bit longer, observing him cautiously. “I’ll leave now. See you later, Sarah.”

  “Later,” I answered before the door closed behind her.

  Mel was the first to move, pulling me into a suffocating hug. “We were so worried! I can’t believe that shit happened, and we didn’t even know... That motherfucker—”

  “I’m in danger now,” I said in strained voice, gritting my teeth. She was squeezing me so hard it hurt. “You’re crushing me.”

  She skipped away from me, a crease forming between her brows. “Oops. Sorry for that. It’s no wonder Steven sometimes says I could be a sumo wrestler! My hugs can be as lethal as his silent farts!”

  Jonathan snorted as Mateo’s lips curled into a smile. A bubble of laughter rose up my throat. She always managed to cheer me up with her hilarious remarks.

  “I thought it was weird that you didn’t come to work on Friday evening, and you didn’t answer Jess’s and my messages... I’m sorry, Sar. I’ve been harsh these last few days, and I’ve said some insensitive things, which I really regret. I was upset, but I should’ve talked with you—” she babbled, which was something she did when she was nervous or excited. At this moment, I couldn’t care less about our argument. I was too close to losing my life—saved by sheer luck—and now all I cared about was being able to see people I cared about again.

  “It doesn’t matter,” I interrupted her. “It doesn’t matter now at all. I’m just so happy to see all of you.”

  I glanced at each one of them, feeling a rush of elation. These people cared for me. They came here as soon as they found out I was in the hospital, and they worried about me...

  Jess put her hand on my shoulder. “Everything is over now, Sar,” she reassured me, her eyes as gentle as her touch. “I want you to know we’re here for you.”

  “Jess told me what happened at your school on Thursday,” Melissa said. “Those bitches are unbelievable, pardon my language, Mr. J. I wish I’d been there, because I would’ve decorated their faces with bruises, and they wouldn’t have needed makeup for the rest of—”