A Walk in Wildflower Park

by Bella Osborne

  ‘O-kay. T-V.’

  As she reached the hall Hudson came out of the kitchen putting his jacket on. ‘What did Liam want?’

  ‘He wants to get back together,’ she said very matter-of-factly.

  ‘Right.’ Hudson pressed his lips together tightly.

  ‘It’s okay. You’re still my fake boyfriend.’

  ‘Phew.’ They both looked apprehensively at each other. ‘I’m going to make a move.’

  ‘Okay.’ Anna had hoped once she’d settled Arlo she’d have some adult company for what was likely to be a long night. ‘Actually, could you do me one more favour?’

  ‘Sure.’

  ‘I’ve not been home to feed Maurice and he’s going to be eating the furniture before long. Here’s my keys. His food is in the cupboard under the sink.’

  ‘No, problem. Do you need anything else? Nightwear? Toothbrush?’

  She did but she didn’t want him looking through her stuff. ‘No, just the cat feeding would be great. Thanks.’

  ‘I won’t go snooping. Cross my heart.’ He gave her a butter-wouldn’t-melt look.

  ‘Okay. Toothbrush and there’s a washbag on the windowsill in the bathroom with most of my stuff. That’d be great. Thanks.’

  Hudson was kicking himself as he left Sophie’s house. He had come with a clear mission for this evening and he had been derailed twice. Was it an omen? Was the universe trying to tell him something? He jogged round to Anna’s front door and let himself in. Maurice came to see him or more likely to point out that he hadn’t been fed.

  ‘Hey, Maurice. Sorry to hear about your balls, big guy.’ Hudson gave him a fuss and tried to encourage him to eat. Maurice sniffed the food and on deciding it wasn’t poisoned he began to eat. Hudson soon found the washbag and was double-checking the door was properly locked when he was aware someone was standing behind him.

  He swung round and came face to face with Connor. ‘Hey, buddy, you gave me a start. You looking for Anna?’

  ‘Is she okay?’ Connor nodded at the floral washbag in Hudson’s hand.

  ‘Yeah, she’s fine. Sophie has gone into labour. Anna’s babysitting and she needed some stuff.’ He held up the washbag as evidence. ‘I’m taking it back now.’ Hudson checked the door again.

  ‘I’ll walk with you,’ said Connor, falling in step.

  ‘Did you and Anna have plans tonight?’ asked Hudson.

  Connor puffed out his cheeks. ‘Look you seem like a decent bloke but just so we’re clear – me and Anna are in a relationship and things are going great. I’d be grateful if you’d respect that.’

  Hudson’s eyebrows puckered. ‘Right. Of course.’

  ‘You don’t mind me mentioning it, do you?’

  ‘No. I mean …’ He wanted to say more but this wasn’t the right time and Connor certainly wasn’t the right person. ‘I’m pleased for you both.’ Hudson gave Connor a convivial pat on the shoulder.

  ‘Thanks. She’s something else, isn’t she?’

  ‘Yeah. You’ve got one of the best there.’ Hudson was relieved when they reached Sophie’s house. ‘You know, I don’t even need to come in. Here.’ He handed Connor the washbag and keys. ‘Tell her I’ll see at work. Night.’

  ‘Will do. Bye.’ Connor waited on the steps and watched Hudson leave before knocking.

  Anna opened the door with a beaming smile, which faltered for the briefest of moments. She looked past Connor. ‘Have you seen …’

  ‘Hudson gave me this,’ he said, handing over the washbag. ‘He had to rush off somewhere.’ Connor shrugged.

  ‘Did he give you my keys?’

  ‘Oh, yeah. Here.’ He handed them over. ‘Can I come in?’

  ‘I’m actually in the middle of putting Arlo to bed and I can’t leave him for one second. Sorry. Can I call you?’

  Connor’s expression was unreadable. ‘Sure. You do what you need to.’

  ‘Thanks.’ She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and shut the door.

  ‘Anna! Anna!’ called Arlo urgently from upstairs.

  ‘Yes, Arlo?’ replied Anna already heading in his direction.

  ‘I’ve done a huge poo! Come and see.’ There was a long pause. ‘Please!’

  Anna was feeding a breakfast of mushed Weetabix to Petal whilst simultaneously discussing the career opportunities of being a Viking with Arlo when her mobile began vibrating along the worktop.

  ‘Hi, Dave,’ she said, before mouthing to Arlo. ‘It’s Daddy.’

  ‘Hello, Daddy,’ shouted Arlo.

  ‘Hi, son,’ replied Dave. Anna put him on speakerphone. ‘Any news?’

  ‘Okay. Yes, we have news. Hey, kids, you’ve got a brand-new … baby …’ there was a long pause ‘… brother.’

  ‘Yay!’ shouted Arlo.

  ‘Ay!’ shouted Petal and she backhanded her Weetabix bowl sending it flying in spectacular fashion across the kitchen, splattering both Anna and Arlo. Arlo started to laugh.

  ‘Congratulations,’ said Anna, wiping the worst of the Weetabix assault off her top.

  Arlo was frowning. ‘Do I have to share my toys?’

  Anna flopped onto the sofa at the end of the longest day of her life. She had been babysitting for twenty-four hours straight. She had no idea how Sophie did it. She was exhausted. She’d taken them both out to the soft play centre, which thankfully had taken up most of the day. Just getting out of the house with two small children needed a project plan.

  The play centre was a big eye-opener for Anna. Whilst most of the other women seemed focused on talking animatedly with friends whilst mainlining lattes, their children were running riot like crazed banshees or, as she began to realise, like children at a soft play centre. She’d planned to set herself up with Petal in the baby area while Arlo burned off some of his overflowing energy supplies, but Anna found herself scooping Petal up every other minute as high-speed sweaty children hurdled her. It was incredibly stressful.

  They had spent the remainder of the afternoon in the park kicking up the autumn leaves and looking for squirrels. Oddly enough, despite Arlo shouting ‘HERE, SQUIRRELS!’ at the top of his voice, they hadn’t even seen a whisker.

  Anna found her eyes were closing when a key in the door made her come to. She crept into the hall.

  ‘Congratulations,’ she said, meeting Dave and Sophie at the door. ‘Kids are asleep,’ she added, as they slunk inside.

  ‘Thanks,’ said Sophie. They all cooed over the tiny baby in the overly large car seat. He was sound asleep, his rosebud lips pouting gently.

  ‘He’s beautiful,’ said Anna.

  Sophie angled her head towards the baby. ‘Dave thinks he looks like Churchill.’

  Dave chuckled. ‘All babies look like Churchill – it’s a well-known fact. He’s still beautiful though.’

  Sophie mouthed, ‘At least he doesn’t look like the Kraken.’

  Anna hid her laughter by pulling her into a hug. ‘How are you?’ she asked. Sophie was pale.

  ‘Okay,’ she said, but her expression told a different story. ‘It was probably the easiest of the births, certainly the quickest. But still, no walk in the park. Unfortunately, they had to cut my rings off.’ She waved her bare left hand sadly.

  ‘Drinks machine was better this time,’ chipped in Dave and he went to get the bags from the car. Sophie rolled her eyes.

  ‘He kept turning the radio up to drown me out,’ she said, although Anna could tell she wasn’t really cross about it.

  ‘Were you being a bit shouty?’

  ‘You would too if you’d almost delivered your child in a wheelbarrow.’ They both laughed.

  Dave reappeared. ‘I’ll put this lot upstairs. You sit down,’ whispered Dave.

  ‘Not after what they’ve done to my undercarriage. I may never sit down again.’

  ‘I’ll put the kettle on,’ Anna cut in, keen not to hear about an episiotomy again.

  ‘Lovely, and you can update me on everything. Still no caffeine for me, I’m breastfeeding.’ Sophie
pulled a disgruntled face and shuffled off to the living room.

  Anna was struggling to remember anything before the babysitting. Was this what it was like for parents?

  She took the drinks through and joined Sophie and Dave in the living room. Anna scooched herself round and peered at the scrunched-up bundle who was now being cradled by his mother. ‘Does he have a name yet?’

  Sophie smiled at Dave who was eyeing the scene fondly. ‘We’re thinking of Reuben.’

  ‘I like it,’ said Anna, failing to hide her surprise at liking the name. She’d been expecting something more obscure.

  ‘Reuben David Butterworth,’ said Sophie, glancing up and giving Dave an indulgent look.

  ‘It was my great-grandad’s name,’ said Dave proudly.

  ‘It’s lovely and it suits him.’ Anna stroked the baby’s cheek and he screwed up his face and for a moment she could see what Dave meant about the Churchill resemblance.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Anna strode into the nursing home day room. ‘Hi, Bert.’ Bert didn’t respond. He had his Mickey Mouse headphones on. She tapped him on the arm and he jumped. ‘Hi, Bert,’ she repeated.

  ‘Oh, Anna. Hello,’ he said, fumbling off the headphones. ‘Let me pause this,’ he said, running his thumb over the iPod until he found the home key. ‘Sit down,’ he said.

  ‘Actually, I’ve got someone to see you. Wait a minute.’ Anna put the coffees down on the table and nipped out of the room. A puzzled-looking Bert tidied up his headphone cable and put them carefully on the floor by his feet.

  Anna came back in but before she could put the carrier down or explain, Maurice spotted Bert and let out a loud meow.

  ‘Maurice?’ said Bert, tears springing to his eyes.

  Anna put the cat carrier on the floor, opened it up and Maurice leaped straight onto Bert’s lap taking him a bit unawares.

  ‘Hello, old fellow. How are you?’ asked Bert and Maurice’s deep purr seemed to ask the same question. Maurice resembled a soldier marching on the spot, lifting up his front paws in turn. Bert was trying to stroke him and wipe away tears at the same time.

  Bert and Maurice seemed oblivious when other residents came over to see what was going on. A carer put her head around the door and gave Anna a warm smile at the sight of so many residents on their feet chattering excitedly and all trying to get a stroke of Maurice. Anna put the cat carrier out of the way – the last thing she wanted was someone tripping over it and breaking a hip.

  Bert’s face radiated happiness and it cheered her deep inside. Maurice was soon over the initial excitement and was now stretched out on Bert’s lap rhythmically kneading his corduroy trousers.

  ‘Anna,’ said Bert, without looking up.

  Anna went to his side and touched his shoulder. ‘Yes.’

  Bert’s voice cracked when he spoke. ‘This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me.’ He reached for her hand and squeezed it firmly. ‘Thank you.’

  ‘You’re welcome, Bert. Maurice is really pleased to see you too. I swear he’s grinning.’

  ‘I can imagine,’ said Bert. ‘I think I’ll have that coffee now, please.’

  Anna and Maurice didn’t stay too long. If Maurice could have curled up and gone to sleep she was sure they could have stayed longer but it seemed all the residents wanted to come and say hello and eventually Maurice jumped off Bert’s lap and started to explore. Anna had agreed the visit with the care home’s manager and the friendly carer had made sure all doors and windows and any other possible escape routes were secure before Anna had brought Maurice in but they still didn’t want a nosy moggy on the loose.

  ‘Okay, time to go,’ she said, lifting Maurice into her arms and putting him on the arm of Bert’s chair.

  Bert seemed to know he was there and gave him a good head rub. ‘Bye, Maurice. It’s been lovely to see you one last time.’

  ‘Actually,’ said Anna. ‘Because you’ve both behaved yourselves, they’ve said we can do this again.’ She leaned in conspiratorially. ‘To be honest they said it’s the first time they’ve seen some of the people in here smile for months.’

  ‘That’s marvellous. When do you think you’ll bring him again?’ Bert’s face was alight.

  Anna mentally whizzed through her calendar. ‘Probably in a couple of weeks.’

  ‘After New York?’ asked Bert.

  ‘Err,’ Anna faltered, she’d pushed it to the back of her mind although her plan was to call in sick on the morning of the flight. It seemed the easiest get-out approach.

  ‘Anna.’ His voice was earnest. ‘Sometimes you need to be braver than you think possible. This is one of those times.’

  Anna’s stomach lurched. It sounded like one of Roberta’s better quotes. ‘I guess.’

  ‘Then I’ll see you and Maurice after you’ve been to New York.’

  Sophie looked at home in Anna’s kitchen eating biscuits while Anna went through her post.

  ‘I saw my GP today. He’s given me some medication in case I want to give flying a go,’ said Anna, feeling the familiar acidic flush in her stomach at the very thought of a plane.

  ‘That’s a hugely positive step. Well done, you.’ Sophie gave her a hug.

  ‘Coffee?’ asked Anna, discarding a pile of leaflets that had been put through with her letters.

  ‘I’m not stopping long but Dave insisted on doing bath time so I thought I might as well pop here for a quick natter and a catch up on all the office gossip.’

  ‘Of course, it’s always lovely to see you,’ said Anna. ‘Not much happening in the office though. Roberta’s still spouting Minnie Mouse’s best motivational quotes and Karl’s still walking up and down while he takes his phone calls.’

  ‘Why do men do that?’

  ‘I have no idea,’ she said, opening an ordinary white envelope and pulling out an invitation. For a moment she experienced a bubble of excitement but when she saw what it said a wave of nausea came over her. Everything that haunted her about the past rushed into her mind and she found herself gripping the card tightly.

  ‘You okay?’ asked Sophie, peering closer. ‘What is it?’ She took the card from Anna’s sweating palm and read it. ‘A university reunion?’

  ‘Is someone playing games?’ Anna searched Sophie’s face for reassurance.

  ‘No, you’re overthinking this. Unis have reunions all the time. People love all the nostalgia it throws up.’ Sophie paused. ‘You know, maybe you should consider going. Lay some ghosts to rest?’

  Anna felt giddy at the thought and had to take a deep breath to control the panic rising inside her. She shook her head. ‘I … I couldn’t. The thought of being there brings it all back.’

  ‘It’s all right.’ Sophie squeezed her shoulder. ‘You don’t have to do anything. But until you face it you’ll never move on. It’s like all the things that scare us in life. You can try ignoring them but eventually they rear up and …’ Anna was blinking rapidly. ‘Forget I said that,’ said Sophie. ‘What do I know?’ She dropped the invitation in the bin and Anna watched it tumble as if in slow motion. ‘Tell me all about your New York plans instead.’

  Anna knew Sophie was right. How much longer could she go on being afraid of her past, ignoring the damage that still haunted her? She knew something had to change but for now Anna just needed to sit down.

  Anna gripped her passport tightly. ‘You need to hand it over now,’ said Hudson, his voice seeming far away.

  ‘What?’ Anna snapped back to the moment. She was standing at the check-in desk at Heathrow Airport. This was her last chance to back out. She’d failed at all the other opportunities. Somehow she felt like she’d made Bert a promise. After this, she was getting on an aeroplane. Anna swallowed hard.

  ‘Anna.’ Hudson’s voice was firmer this time. ‘You need to do this,’ he said, before lowering his voice. ‘Because if you don’t there is now a long line of customers who will merrily lynch you.’

  Anna nodded more times than was healthy in quick s
uccession. ‘Right. Yes. I can do this.’ She forcefully thrust her passport forward, taking the zoned-out check-in desk operative by surprise.

  ‘Thank you, have you read the list regarding hand luggage …’ It seemed to kick-start him off on his recited piece, which he probably repeated hundreds of times a day. Anna answered the questions as if she were in court being charged with something. When the grilling was over he held out her passport and boarding pass and said in a singsong voice, ‘Have a nice flight.’

  Anna was trying to form a reply when Hudson guided her away. ‘Next we are going through security check, then to the champagne bar.’

  ‘I’m going to need to score hard drugs before I can get on the plane. What am I doing?’ Anna spun around feeling disorientated by all the jolly people with brightly coloured cases.

  ‘You are getting on a plane to New York if it’s the last thing you do.’

  Anna stopped walking. ‘It was the last thing my sister did,’ she said, her face serious.

  ‘What?’ Hudson looked shocked.

  ‘Lynsey, my sister. I told you she had undiagnosed epilepsy and had a seizure.’

  ‘Yeah.’ He gave a sympathetic head tilt.

  ‘It happened on the flight to Tenerife.’ Anna felt wobbly as a sick sensation washed over her.

  Hudson rubbed his temple. ‘That’s why you have a fear of flying.’ It was a statement, not a question, but Anna nodded. ‘I’m sorry if I’ve pressured you into this. I didn’t realise …’

  ‘It’s okay. I have to face it one day. Why not today?’ She tried her hardest to sound positive.

  ‘Why not indeed.’ He linked arms with her and escorted her to security.

  The business lounge was like a very swish hotel reception and Hudson checked them both in. Anna was still feeling a little flustered after the security check. She was sitting with an orange juice watching Hudson sip chilled champagne.

  ‘You’ve done this loads, haven’t you?’ she asked.

  ‘Yep, I’ve no idea how many times. It’s like taking the train to me.’

  ‘That’s good,’ said Anna. ‘I’ll remember that. It’s like taking the train … apart from being thirty-nine thousand feet up in the air!’ She took a gulp from her orange juice and choked.