by Colbie Kay
“We could do anything we fucking want.” My head jerks forward, his lips crash into mine. Butterflies swarm deep in my belly at the touch of his tongue against mine. Our kiss deepens, Chayser’s hands grip my ass as he pulls me impossibly closer. My hips automatically begin to move, my pussy rubs against his growing erection. I don’t know if I’m angry or elated that our clothes are keeping us from making a decision that could potentially change everything.
My phone begins to ring beside us. Breaking from the kiss, I’m breathless as I answer, “Hello?”
“Shug, it’s Hanger.”
“Hanger.” His name sticks in my throat. Why is he calling me? Chayser sits up straighter with me still in his lap.
“I need you to get to the club now.”
“What? Why?”
“Don’t ask questions. Just get your ass here now!” He disconnects before I can get another word in.
I jump off Chayser’s lap and rush around to find my keys. “We gotta go to the club.”
“Why? What’s going on?” Chayser slowly stands. “What are you looking for?”
“My keys. I don’t know why. Hanger wouldn’t tell me, but if he’s calling, it’s something important.” Unlike when I wouldn’t answer his calls after I shot Ghost, I didn’t do anything this time. It has to be something important for him to need me there. I could tell by the tone of his voice something is wrong.
“You can ride with me.”
“No.” I shake my head. “I’m taking my car.” I finally find them stuffed into one of the cushions of the couch. Running out of the apartment, I race down the stairs and jump into my car.
I push through the door of the clubhouse and immediately stop. I’m frozen. “What are you doing here?” Anger, resentment, rage begin to surface inside of me.
“I came to see you, baby.” She steps toward me and reaches up to touch my face.
“Don’t touch me,” I seethe through my clenched teeth, jerking away from her. “Hanger!” I shout. When I see him, I demand, “Why did you call me here?”
“Because what happens is your decision.”
Tears well in my eyes, and I press my lips together.
“Don’t you want to see your mom?” she questions with a look of confusion.
Rounding on her, I clench my hands into fists. “Seven years! Seven fucking years since I’ve seen you. You left me here to fend for myself when I was fifteen!” I yell at her.
She scratches at her arms. “I knew you were in good hands.”
“Good hands?” My head rears back as if she slapped me. “You stole money from them and left me to fucking clean up the mess up! Oh yeah, I was left in good hands, alright. They took real good care of me until it was my time to pay it back.”
“Shug, the fuck you talkin’ about?” Hanger’s eyes widen as if he’s surprised.
I angrily wipe away tears rolling down my cheeks. “That was the deal, Hanger. Bulk said I could stay here, and he would put me through college, but nothing came free. He said once I turned eighteen, it would be time to pay my dues. I told him that I would pay back every dime I owed plus her fucking debt, too, but he said my money wasn’t good. He had enough money. He said I was such a pretty girl that all the men would love me…just like my own mother told me when I was a kid.”
“Fucking Christ, Shug!” Hanger runs his hand over his short dark hair. “Why didn’t you ever tell me?”
“Because, Hanger, as far as you knew, he was your father and the greatest man you ever knew.”
He shakes his head. “All this time, after I took over as president, you thought you had to keep the deal, and I thought I was doing what was right. You never had to pay back a goddamn thing, Shug. Fuck!”
My attention refocuses on my mother. “Why did you really show up?” It’s sad seeing the effects of her drug use. She’s too thin, and her cheeks are sunken in. Her teeth are completely gone, and she can’t seem to stand still.
Her head tilts to the side. “I wanted to see you.”
“Bullshit! You look like a fucking junkie, so what do you want? Money? You thought after you stole from this club, you could come back and all would be forgiven, or they wouldn’t remember?”
“Since you mentioned it…”
I laugh humorlessly. “You didn’t come to see me. You came to try and get what you could from me.”
“What’s it gonna be, Shug?” Hanger asks, and my glare cuts to him.
“I don’t want to make that decision, Hanger.” My stomach rolls with unease. Her fate can’t lie in my hands. I can’t have that on my conscience. “You decide. I can’t.” I shake my head frantically. Hanger nods as if he understands.
His eyes stare into mine, devoid of any emotion. “We’ll make it look like an accident.”
There you have it, my mother’s fate is sealed.
“Shug?” My mother’s questioning eyes beg me to do something.
“You did this to yourself.” I turn to leave and walk back outside.
“Shug!” Chayser’s voice comes from behind me.
“I can’t do this, Chayser. I’m sorry. I have to go.”
His hands grasp my arms. “Don’t do this.”
Pulling away from him, I repeat, “I’m sorry. I thought for a second maybe we could have something, but then this…” I point toward the door of the clubhouse. “I can’t, Chayser.” A new round of tears begins to fall.
His eyes narrow, and he throws his arms in the air. “You’re just going to give up that easily?”
“I’m not giving up.” I smile. “That’s what you don’t get. This is your life, Chayser, not mine. I’m going to do what I should have done a long time ago.”
“And what’s that?”
“I’m getting the hell out of this city!”
A deep rumbling laugh escapes him. “You mean you’re going after that fucking cowboy.”
“I don’t know where I’ll end up. All I know is, I’m going to have a future, and it’s away from Satan's Sinners.” Part of that's true, but he’s right, I’m heading to North Carolina. I should have fought harder for Cody, and I should have never let him leave.
“I’m not chasing after you anymore.” He shakes his head and snaps, “I hope you find whatever it is you’re searching for.”
“I’m not asking you to chase after me. I never wanted you to,” I throw back.
His nostrils flare, and he squares his shoulders. “Don’t fucking come back here when you want to run away again.” He storms into the clubhouse.
I stagger to my car, and once I have the key in the ignition, I call Pudge.
“Hey,” she answers quickly.
“Where are you?” I ask as I pull out of the gate.
“I just got home, why?”
I grin. “Pack a bag. We’re going on a road trip.” After I hang up, I call Ever.
“Cody.” Her voice trembles behind me.
Turning to face her, I ask, “What’re you doin’ here, Sonya?” I didn’t even hear her climb up the ladder or step into the loft in the barn. I’ve been up here throwing bales of hay down to the lower level. She looks exhausted but good at the same time. Really good actually in her oversized t-shirt and shorts with her hair pulled up high into a messy bun.
“I followed Jake.” She casts her gaze downward and fiddles with her fingers. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, but you can’t be mad at me for my past. I’m sure that redhead in the office wasn’t the first woman you’d ever fucked.”
I take a deep breath and slowly release it. “It wasn’t your past, though, was it?” My brows furrow, it still hurts like hell seeing her there. “I haven’t fucked anyone since I met you, and when I showed up to surprise you, I was hit with my own surprise. It ripped my fuckin’ heart out seein’ you walk out of that hallway with him and holdin’ his hand.”
“I wasn’t having sex with him. I haven’t been with anyone since I met you either. But you don’t understand my life, Cody.”
“Then explain it to me, because
I’m still tryin’ to figure out how a smart and beautiful woman would want to—”
“I didn’t want to!” Sonya’s voice rises in volume. “I had to.”
Taking the gloves off my hands, I throw them onto the loft floor. “What do you mean had to?”
She sighs heavily. “My mom was a club whore before she ever had me and got pregnant by one of the bikers. Bulk, the president at the time, let her stay there while she was pregnant with me. By the time I was fifteen, she was addicted to drugs, drank all the time, and her addiction had gotten so bad, she stole thousands of dollars from the club.” She shakes her head and continues, “I don’t know how she did it, but she took off in the middle of the night and left me there. I had nowhere to go and knew no one outside of the club. Bulk let me stay there and started putting me through college, but it was on the condition that I paid my dues when I turned eighteen. Hanger, the president now, took over when Bulk was killed and kept on paying my tuition. I would have never been able to pay off what I owed, and my mother’s debt and Bulk knew that. Even with the money I made from the clothing store, it would have never been enough.”
“Why not just give them money instead of yourself?”
“I tried, but Bulk wouldn’t take my money. I had no choice, Cody. I floated through this life I hated. Hanger never knew what Bulk told me, and I assumed Hanger would do as Bulk did, but I was wrong.”
“Why wouldn’t you kiss me? You barely touched me.”
“You were the first guy I ever felt something for. I wanted to be valued for more than my body. I wanted something real for the first time in my life. Sex with the club meant nothing, I felt nothing. It was like I could zone out and take myself to another place until it was over. I never enjoyed any of it. But when you kissed me…” Her smile beams. “My world brightened, the earth shattered beneath my feet, and my body exploded with feelings. It was breathtaking, and nothing I had ever experienced before.”
I cocked a brow at her. “I was your first kiss?” I ask in disbelief.
She nods. “You were.”
“I’m sorry for the shitty hand you’ve been dealt. I’m sorry for leavin’ and not lettin’ you explain.” I understand her a little more now that I know her story. After I had that talk with Momma and Jake, I knew I needed to re-evaluate how I felt about Sonya. Would it have really been worth losing her forever? I knew it wouldn’t, which is why I was going to leave for Kansas tomorrow, but she came to me instead.
“Can you forgive me?” Sonya’s eyes plead with me.
“I can forgive you, but what happens now?”
She shrugs. “Pudge and I will get an apartment and look for jobs.”
“Wait, you’re staying in North Carolina?” My chest tightens with hope.
She laughs. “Yeah, we packed our suitcases yesterday and just left.”
“I think you can definitely be forgiven.” I stride closer to her and snake my arm around her waist, pulling her into me. She gazes up at me as I stare down at her, and my lips descend on hers softly at first until our tongues slide together, then it’s a fight to stay in control.
We break from the kiss, and clothes fall from our bodies while our eyes remain locked. “You’re so beautiful,” I praise her as she stands before me naked and stunning. Her long dark hair flows down over her shoulders, covering her tight rosy nipples.
“You’re not so bad yourself.” Sonya smirks before wrapping her arms around my neck. Connected once again, I lower us to the floor of the barn. This will more than likely hurt like hell from the hay and splinters of wood, but at this moment, I don’t care. I’m not going to ruin this with trying to find somewhere else more comfortable. “Do you have a condom?” she mumbles against my lips.
Shit! I am entirely entranced and didn’t think about protection. Reaching around her, I pull my jeans toward us and grab my wallet. Once I have the condom in my hand, I rip the plastic open and sheath myself in the latex. She settles herself above me and slowly lowers herself onto my cock. Her eyes flutter while mine begin to close.
Sonya rolls her hips as loud cries of pleasure fall from her full, plump lips. I have to touch her. Reaching out with my hands, I move her hair behind her shoulders, sliding my fingers down to her tits. Her breasts feel heavy as I kneed the flesh and lean closer, taking one of her hardened buds into my mouth. Her head rolls back, her sounds becoming deafening.
“You feel too damn good,” I whisper, letting her nipple go.
“You too,” she moans as I suck the other into my mouth.
Her rhythm quickens, and her quick breaths match my short pants. “Cody!” she screams my name as her orgasm blasts through her body. “Oh God!”
My hands find her ass cheeks, and I take control. I move her up and down, hard and rough until my own release builds and builds inside of me. “Fuck!” I groan, jerking her close. Finding the crook of her neck, I press my lips to her skin as my cum fills the condom.
Both of us are breathless and sated, and we don’t move. Her head rests against my chest, and I run my hands through her long dark hair. After a few minutes, she leans up. “When is your show in Vegas?”
I sigh. “I was supposed to leave tomorrow.”
Her brows pull down. “Supposed to?”
“Yeah, I backed out. I haven’t been ridin’ my best this last month, and I was goin’ to be comin’ to Kansas instead.”
“You were?” she asks in awe, her eyes wide with wonder. “Why?”
I grin. “For you, but you showed up first.”
“But it’s your dream, Cody, and because of me, you aren’t going.” She stands. “I don’t want you to give up your dreams for me. God! I fuck everything up!”
I quickly take the condom off and jump up. “Hey!” I take her hands in mine and kiss the knuckles on both of them. “You didn’t fuck anythin’ up. I was ridin’ shitty, and it was my decision. I decided that you’re worth more than those eight-seconds.” I shrug, “Besides, there’s always next year.”
She gasps. “Cody.”
“I love you, Sonya, and that’s all that matters.”
Unshed tears pool in her gaze. “I love you, too. I never thought I could have this.”
“Have what?”
“A normal life.” Her gaze lowers.
I place my thumb under her chin and bring her gaze back to mine. I touch my lips to her forehead and tell her, “I’m gonna give you everythin’ except a normal life. I’m gonna give you the whole goddamn world.”
I lean against the shower wall with my eyes closed as the warm water runs down my body. The shower door opens, and a smile forms on my lips. Opening my eyes, my gaze meets a very naked, very sexy Cody Sterling. “How’s it feel to be number one in the world?” I ask while wrapping my arms around his neck.
“It feels pretty damn good.” His lips find the crook of my neck.
He peppers kisses along my flesh. “What’s next for you, Mr. Sterling?”
Cody lowers himself down my wet soaking body. He stops at my swollen belly and places his lips at my belly button. “I was thinkin’ since we’re already here in Vegas…” His gaze drifts up to mine. “We could go to one of those little chapels and make it official. You wanna be my eight-second ride for the rest of my life?”
My mouth drops open. “You want to get married while we’re in Vegas?”
His smile is gorgeous. “Why not? We’ll be meetin’ our daughter in a couple months, and I’d like her momma to have the same last name.”
“Right now? Like right now?” I’m trying to wrap my head around what he’s saying.
“Well, maybe not right at this minute, but yeah. Jake and Pudge are only a few doors down; they can go with us.”
“Yes! Let’s go!” I quickly spin my body to shut off the water, and I knock Cody to the shower floor. “I’m going to call Pudge and tell them to be ready.”
He laughs. “We could have sex before we go.”
“We can have sex after,” I yell from the bedroom and grab my phone from the
bed. I unlock my phone, and as I’m getting ready to hit Pudge’s number, Jake’s number appears on my screen. “Hey, Jake! I was just about to call—”
Jake cuts me off, “There’s somethin’ wrong with Pudge. An ambulance is takin’ us to the hospital.” His voice is frantic.
I fall down onto the mattress, and the phone drops beside me. I hear his voice screaming at me through the phone, but I’m frozen thinking about what could be wrong, my mind racing with worst case scenarios. I can’t lose my best friend. This day was perfect, and now, with one phone call, my world is shattering.
Rodeo by Garth Brooks
Cowboy Take Me Away by Dixie Chicks
Desire by Brian Farrell
Vice by Miranda Lambert
Pretty Cry by Carrie Underwood
Fancy by Reba McEntire
To my family once again thank you for giving me a reason to follow my dreams.
Maria and T.E.- Once again, we made it here! I can't thank you two ladies enough for everything you have done for me.
Gigi and Cristina- Wow! I have no words for how beautiful and talented you two are. G, you are the Queen for a reason! Cristina, I am so beyond honored to be the first author to have you on their cover! I see many more books with you on them in the future. You are gorgeous, girl!
As always, my beta ladies- thank you for everything you ladies do for me.
My readers- You know I love each and every one of you! Without you I would not be able to fulfill this passion of mine and because of you I get to do what I love every day.
All the amazing blogs- keep doing what you do for all of us authors because without you we wouldn't be able to put these books out there for our readers.
Colbie Kay always had a love for reading and wanted to pursue writing. In 2015 she made that dream come true when she published her first book. Since then she has become a stay-at-home mom, writing full-time and bringing her passion to life through the words she creates.
The most fulfilling part of being an author for Colbie is to take readers into a fantasy world between the pages of her books. Becoming an author has also given her the opportunity to fill another passion of hers, which is traveling. She loves being able to attend book signings and meeting everyone that shares her love of books.