Technically, You Started It
Page 7
I mean, you didn’t do it either.
How would you know if I did this or not???
Oh, right, strangers.
Sorry.
Not that.
Never mind. I’m being stupid.
What? You’re not stupid.
You did better than a B on your speech.
We got As and you only got a B???
What was Mrs. James thinking?
Perhaps that I should have strung more than five words together at a time?
You weren’t that bad.
Also, something about it being about stating an argument rather than a recitation of facts.
You were robbed.
I could have done better.
My visual aid was lackluster.
I got over interested in the details.
Clearly.
Are you mad at me?
…
You sound mad at me.
I’m sorry I didn’t get a better grade.
It’s not that at all.
Don’t worry about it.
Are you sure?
Weren’t you in a hurry?
Well, yeah, I gotta go eat.
But I think you’re upset.
Eat.
We can talk later.
This isn’t important.
You’re sure?
I have to come up with a new celebrity crush.
Mine’s too old.
Well, good luck with that!
Whatever.
You going to Lexi’s Friday Funday???
Not now.
You OK?
No.
Family stuff?
No.
OK.
You still awake?
Yeah
Isn’t this after plug-in?
Yeah. Well.
I kinda snuck downstairs.
To talk to me?
Couldn’t sleep.
You OK?
Yes.
No.
I don’t know.
Why are you still awake?
Doing some PvP.
Oh, yeah? Beating everyone else at capture the flag?
Of course you know what PvP is.
No, Jack and I are in a 2v2 with our Horde alts.
Of course.
I probably couldn’t take you on even if I DID have a partner, but I’d beat both of you up and down any battleground you choose.
Like you did at the spelling bee?
We both lost that.
I didn’t choke on an EASY word.
Look. Judgemental is a super-hard word to remember.
Did it again.
ARGH! Judgmental. Judgmental. Judgmental. Judgmental.
This is not very stranger-ly of you.
Sorry.
No, it’s okay. It’s kind of nice actually.
???
You know me and still want to talk to me.
Why wouldn’t I?
You’d be surprised.
Did you fight with someone?
Sorta.
Anyone I should pretend not to know?
No.
Okay, yes.
I won’t ask
It’s ridiculous.
I got into a fight with Sarah … and Chloe.
???
I guess Chloe recognized the clown’s car in the parking lot, so Sarah was giving me the third degree.
You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.
No, I mean, it’s embarrassing.
He’s been coming in all week.
It’s nice your manager just lets maniac clowns roam free like that.
Okay, maybe “maniac” is a bit strong.
Now we’re getting somewhere.
Well, right.
That’s the problem.
Sarah actually asked if I was dating him.
Can you believe that???
How’d they get that from one drive-by?
Probably from me not insulting him the second his name was mentioned.
The second?
Is that how you usually react?
That’s a lot of hate.
I screwed up.
You’re too good a friend.
Tell Chloe that.
Trust me I would
But it probably wouldn’t help.
Uh, no. Really wouldn’t.
In fact, especially act like we’re strangers when Sarah and Chloe are around.
Doing my best not to say anything to Chloe these days.
Good, because I don’t think she likes me.
She definitely doesn’t like me as much as she likes Sarah.
I guess they’ve been hanging out … a lot.
Because that makes sense.
So, yeah. That’s why I was upset.
Sorry.
What are you sorry for? It’s not your fault.
It’s a little my fault.
How? You’re a stranger that lives halfway across nowhere.
Right sorry
This Chloe sounds a bit …
Yeah I don’t know what word to use without you getting mad.
She’s a bit spoiled.
But she’s super smart.
And Sarah seems to really like her.
And if the price of keeping both of them happy is not liking someone who has nothing to do with me, so what?
So you don’t ACTUALLY hate him?
I don’t know.
I mean, before you and I started talking? A little.
Now?
I am willing to sell him burritos.
All to keep Chloe happy?
Why??? So she won’t be mean to you?
I don’t know.
It’s easier.
For you or her?
For Sarah?
Doesn’t sound like you want to.
I want to. I mean, he did break my best friend’s heart into a thousand pieces once.
If he hadn’t betrayed Chloe the same way he did Sarah, things wouldn’t be this bad.
???
You know about the other girl?
At camp?
The one he cheated on Sarah with.
HE cheated on HER?
Yeah? Didn’t you know?
I can honestly say I’ve never heard this before.
He started liking someone else, and when Sarah confronted him about it, he just stopped talking to her entirely.
No closure, nothing. Just cold shoulder.
That’s what she told you?
I mean, I get why they’re both upset.
It hurts when someone doesn’t like you back.
But does that mean you have to keep punishing someone when they don’t have anything to do with it?
How is this punishment? It’s not like he even knows I exist beyond nasty burritos.
Have YOU liked someone who didn’t like you back?
EVERYONE I’ve liked hasn’t liked me back.
I’ve never managed to like anyone who COULD like me back.
If I can like the wrong person at the wrong time, that’s the only person I’ll like.
And I can never tell anyone because it’s way too late and everything about it is wrong.
I can screw up any chance at a relationship. It kinda comes with being me.
What do you mean?
I’m a freak.
You’ve seen it.
I can make anything awkward. I like everything too much. I know more than any human should about things no one cares about.
I barely speak aloud.
Even my friends don’t want to spend time with me.
The only reason YOU talk to me is because we’re texting.
You would NEVER talk to me if it wasn’t texting.
No, you never DID talk to me before texting.
You still haven’t.
You are not a freak.
HA!
I mean it
You’re interesting
You know the coolest stuff.
Tho I’d rather not know about menopau
se.
See! I make anything awkward.
A little
But you’re not terrible.
You don’t manipulate people.
Who else am I going to talk to the next time I have to babysit clay?
Weirdo.
I’m messed up too you know.
Oh, right. The handsome, rich, famous, charming, clever guy who also happens to be smart is messed up too.
That’s not me.
Everyone disagrees.
You were so perfect the universe basically cloned you.
Ugh, no one wants to be anything like me.
You really think that way?
And cocky. Ugh, this is not about you right now!!!!
I suck at this.
What do you want me to do?
I just want you to agree with me.
Can’t … sorry.
Why not?
Nothing you’ve said is true.
MAYBE that I’m perfect …
But sorry I didn’t talk to you before.
No, you’re not.
You were quiet so I thought you were shy.
Like catatonic.
But I could tell you were paying attention to everything
Like all the time.
It’s intimidating.
Great. Even you’re afraid of me.
Not afraid of you.
Well
I was
Of course.
BUT!!!
Now I kind of like it.
Because I distract you when you’re bored.
Not anymore!
Learned that lesson the hard way.
You didn’t even want to talk to me after that.
That’s not it!
It’s been two days.
Last night was forced family time with my mother and CHUCK who can have me fired.
He took us to this ridiculously expensive sushi place
We had an entire table full of fish.
You don’t have to make excuses.
I’m not!
It’s fine. You don’t have to talk to me.
Haley
Listen to me.
I’m telling the truth.
I should probably go to bed. My dad might wake up and check on me.
Fine don’t listen.
I need to go.
Just, one thing.
What’s that?
Don’t message me after we say good night.
Why not?
Because I don’t want to miss it.
AND because my mom will hear and wake up.
She’ll hear your phone?
On vibrate.
From a dead sleep.
That’s like superhuman.
Normal moms wake up when their teenagers sneak downstairs, she wakes up at cell phones.
On VIBRATE?
Superpower.
Tell me about it.
Okay, so, night.
Good night, Haley
And Haley’s super mother.
Sorry about last night.
You didn’t need that.
At brunch
WILL TALK LATER.
Sorry … we had bonus Saturday family time today.
No, it’s fine. I said what I wanted to say.
I haven’t.
I was just tired. It wasn’t anything big.
I’m sorry you had to deal with it.
Want to tell me what really happened?
It was stupid.
Sarah overheard heard someone say your cousin has someone new. She and Chloe decided they needed to warn his latest victim first.
Then Chloe mentioned seeing his car at the gas station.
I don’t know what she thinks she saw. He was just buying a freaking burrito.
So they overreacted.
I did. You didn’t need that.
Just pretend it didn’t happen.
Would you stop saying that?
Sorry.
Stop apologizing.
You OK now?
Yeah. I’m fine.
But are you mad at me?
No. Why?
I just …
ARGH!
I’m glad you talked to me last night.
Really?
You not talking to me would worry me.
I’m sorry.
No, I mean, I won’t bother you with that stuff anymore.
That’s the opposite of what I meant.
No, it’s fine.
I’m glad you told me what happened
I wanted to know why you were upset.
You don’t have to say that just because I had a bad day.
Like I say things just to make you happy.
Good point!
You can talk to me when you feel like that.
I don’t need you to make everything better. This isn’t really about Chloe.
It’s not even about Sarah.
It’s my brain. You can’t fix that.
I can try.
No, don’t try.
I don’t want that kind of help.
???
Last night was about being in my head all the time. Every second of the day. Always. Forever.
I just couldn’t sleep.
Just don’t stop talking to me
No matter what happens.
Promise?
You say that now.
You think you have a corner on bad days?
Overly dramatic bad days? Yes. All mine. No one else can have any.
Wait until my next bad day and I guarantee you’ll be impressed.
You’re scheduling bad days in advance?
We’re traveling next week
There are plenty of bad days ahead.
Oh, that sucks.
I thought vacations were all about fun.
You have never been on vacation with my father
And his wife
Pre-divorce.
Where are you going?
Paris.
How tragic.
The nicer the place the worse it gets.
I’m taking odds on whether or not he compares her to a Rubens or Madame Defarge.
Why not both?
I like the way you think.
Sorry, that was mean.
We have to laugh or we cry
And we’re too manly to cry.
Well, I may be. I don’t know about you.