Darlings of Decay

by Chrissy Peebles

  “Hello, gentlemen, welcome to Phase One of the LDR program. In a second, the doors will open and all you have to do is head inside to begin your tour.”

  The voice came through an old intercom system. As the door opened the two men made their way inside. Ted wondered how fast John could run with the camera, he assumed not very.

  John slowly went through the doorway, filming the whole time. The floor was covered in some sort of thick ooze, and the walls had a disturbing amount of blood on them and upon closer inspection many teeth as well.

  A man in a stained lab coat came at them. Ted let out a small scream.

  “Hello, there. You two must be from the news station. We heard you were going to come down here and give some positive attention to our little organization. I’m doctor Herron, the dentist in charge of Phase One.”

  Doctor Herron stood there with some sort of permanent grin on his face. He held onto a tank of some sort, either because he enjoyed the way it felt, or he needed the support. The smile still in place he reached out to shake the hands of the two men. However the brownish fluid on the gloves he wore prevented them from cooperating.

  Ted looked at the blood stains covering the doctor’s coat, then down to the sticky floor. He had no idea the things this room had witnessed, but he knew it was a bad sign the dentist wore more protective gear than a virgin on prom night.

  “Hello, doctor Herron, it’s nice to meet you. I’m a huge fan of your work. Can you tell me exactly what it is you do?”

  Doctor Herron gave an odd smile at the comment, but didn’t say anything.

  “Of course, well as I said I’m the dentist in charge of Phase One. When the Zombies first arrive, they are at their most dangerous. As you know a bite from one of them results in immediate infection. To prevent this from happening they are brought to my office, and neutered by me.” The dentist chuckled at his joke. Ted did not change his facial expression. John moved his legs uneasily.

  “Very interesting, doctor Herron, and why would a dentist want to neuter a Zombie? Are you trying to tell me they can make baby Zombies?”

  Another odd look from doctor Herron was sent Ted’s way.

  “Umm no, what I meant is, I remove all their teeth mister Brock. After which they can no longer bite anyone, and are essentially neutered.” Ted fidgeted with his mic, avoiding thinking about the sticky floors.

  “Right of course, I just wanted you to explain for our audience.” Doctor Herron tilted his head to the side and smiled.

  “Then let’s get started with a demonstration. This is your lucky day. We just got in a shipment of fresh Zombies so you can witness the work we do here to help make Zombies safer, and easier to reintegrate back into society.”

  Ted and John watched as doctor Herron grabbed the laughing gas, placed the mask on himself inhaling deeply.

  “Right then, let’s start yanking some teeth, guys.”

  Ted looked terrified, and John got as close to the door as possible. Doctor Herron looked totally at ease as he pressed a button.

  “Bring it in.” He removed his finger from the button and smiled at the two men.

  Ted went rigid and casually put his hand inside his coat jacket so he could hold onto the gun.

  A door in the back of the room creaked open and a Zombie appeared with three men covered in protective gear. A thick collar hung around the Zombie’s neck which helped the men keep control over it with via a rabies stick. There were rusty shackles on its wrists and ankles which also aided in controlling it. Ted watched in horror as the Zombie entered, and the two now shared a room.

  Ted began to turn green, the smell of the place getting worse. He had to fight back the rising bile, it became overwhelming.

  Ted watched John get a close up with the camera, showing flesh hanging loosely, and in some places falling off of the Zombie.

  Ted swallowed the gorge rising in his throat. Then the Zombie let out a gut wrenching noise and liquid poured out of its mouth. Ted watched as John spit something onto the wall behind him. Ted knew he was not the first one based on the collection. Ted casually turned and threw up in what he hoped was a trash can. John made sure to get it all on tape.

  “Thanks. Just secure it in the chair, please.”

  The camera recorded as three men maneuvered the Zombie into the dentist’s chair, then secured its arms and legs. The collar around the neck locked into place, as well as a strap he wrapped across its forehead.

  Doctor Herron pulled over a mobile tray full of dirty tools and grabbed a metal device with crusty gore all over it.

  “See, we try to be as humane as possible. These pliers are some of the best, with a great grip. I can yank a tooth in less than three seconds.” Ted smiled uncomfortably at the mad dentist.

  Doctor Herron pulled on the forehead strap restraining the Zombie’s head. The force of the motion, causing its mouth to open. Doctor Herron then shoved a wedge inside to prevent it from closing.

  The doctor went to work immediately. The only sounds heard within the room were the exertions of doctor Herron, the groans of the Zombie, and the occasional clink of a tooth being tossed in the general direction of a metallic bowl. Ted winced in sympathy.

  “Excuse me, doctor Herron, are you sure it isn’t painful?”

  “Nah, they don’t feel any pain, so it would be a waste to use any sort of pain killer on them. Oh, and in case you were wondering, they really can’t get any sicker than they are so there’s no need to worry about clean tools.” The doctor smiled, and Ted equated it to a serial killer.

  Ted watched as the doctor kneeled on the lap of the Zombie to get into a better position to yank out a particularly stubborn tooth. When he finally got it, he admired it for several seconds before tossing it towards the bowl. He missed, and Ted saw the tooth and a portion of gum line.

  Ted wondered what doctor Herron did before he got this job, dentist enforcer for the mob? He thought there might be a story there.

  Twenty-eight long minutes later, the Zombie sat neutered. Ted removed his hand from his breast pocket, breathing for the first time since the dentist started. Finally, he felt safe.

  The doctor, sweating and covered in blood, smiled at Ted. Several teeth were scattered across the floor, along with bits and pieces of tissue.

  “So, as you see, it’s a rather easy process, and neutralizes their ability to bite and infect people. Now we send it to Phase Two. You can follow the men through the door. I have several dozen Zombie’s waiting out back.”

  Ted placed his hand back in his breast pocket. The information about dozens of Zombie’s waiting to be neutered scaring the hell out of him. His bladder felt funny, and the fact there was a Phase Two made him want to run away.

  Ted motioned John to go ahead of him, following the two men prodding the Zombie along. The hallway floor slick with dark blood and other liquids Ted didn’t want to think about. Moments later they arrived at a door with the number two written on it.

  The two men knocked, when an opening appeared they shoved the Zombie inside. They led it to a metal table forcing it to lie down. Once prone, shackles kept its wrists, ankles, and head in place. Ted noticed it was an autopsy table and began to feel a bit nauseous.

  “Come on in you two. Don’t be shy. This is an educational program as well as a rehabilitative one. I’m doctor Ken Mengles.”

  Ted shoved John into the room then followed a few feet behind. They both looked up to see dozens of eager young faces in an observation window above. Bright lights lined the ceiling. The same sticky substance from the dentist’s office could be found here. The walls were relatively clean, but the tray of tools next to the table were rusty and old.

  “I know this can look shocking at first. The look on your face speaks volumes. All I can do is assure you everything will be fine. Just relax and you’ll see all the good work we do here.” Ted cleared his throat.

  “Doctor Mengles, exactly what is Phase Two?”

  “Phase Two, is technically, an autopsy.” Ted tried
not to look appalled.

  “But isn’t it still alive, how can you do this? Autopsies on Zombies might be considered cruel and unusual by some people, not me at all, but maybe others.” Ted looked towards the observation room and smiled.

  “A common misconception held by many, which we try and change with our work here. Come over and take a listen.” The doctor held out a stethoscope to Ted.

  Ted didn’t want to take a listen. He wanted to leave this place. Then again he wanted a better job, so he slowly made his way over to the doctor. The Zombie twitched and fought against its bonds, but seemed to be secure. Ted put his ear as close as he dare to the stethoscope and listened.

  “I’m sorry, doctor, it’s broken. I don’t hear anything.” The doctor laughed as did the people in the observation room.

  “I’m sorry, mister Brock, I don’t mean to laugh. It isn’t broken. Zombies are categorized as the living dead. This means technically they’re dead, they have no heartbeat, no need to breathe, and as far as we can tell have no real thought process other than to find food.” Ted moved away positioning, himself between John and the Zombie.

  “So, why do you need to do an autopsy then?” Ted decided then and there he deserved some sort of award for doing this damn story.

  “Well, you have to understand just because a Zombie is dead, and had its teeth removed doesn’t mean it can’t infect you.”

  Ted took three more steps back and watched John reach into his pocket. Ted thought John had finally cracked ready to blow them all away. He lifted his hands to protect his face, but when he saw a bottle of anti-bacterial lotion in John’s hand he cleared his throat and looked at the doctor.

  “Really, doctor, that’s fascinating. So how exactly can we still get infected?”

  “Zombies are giant petrie dishes for all sorts of bacteria, not to mention the liquids in their system still carry the Zombie virus. We autopsy them to determine what health risks they pose, and whether or not they should be reintegrated based on that risk. For example, if we get a Zombie carrying the plague we can’t very well let it back into society.”

  “Of course not. Do a lot of them tend to carry the plague?” Ted plastered a fake smile on his face all the while wondering how one caught the plague. He debated holding his breath for the duration of his time here.

  “Not many, but enough. But there are many benefits to doing autopsies on Zombies. Firstly, we can teach medical students how to perform them, and what kind of surprises to expect. Secondly, we try to correct a lot of the damage inflicted on these poor creatures. The more holes we patch up, the less likely they are to leak.”

  Ted watched the doctor begin the autopsy on the Zombie. He cut down the center of its chest and pulled out various internal organs. The doctor pulled out the heart and held it up so the students in the observation room could see.

  “Take a look at this, it is important to note the atrophied heart muscle. This is one of the first things you need to look at in any autopsy. This heart tells us that in human life this Zombie was rather lazy, and didn’t take cardio seriously. Most likely why he got caught.” The doctor laughed as did the students. Ted did not.

  The doctor placed the heart back inside the chest cavity using staples, sutures, and super glue to help keep it in place. Then he poked around and pulled out the liver. Ted tried very hard to keep his bagel down.

  “Okay, have a look at this, see how engorged it is? Another important organ to examine when doing an autopsy. This tells us that in his human life the Zombie most likely suffered from cirrhosis, probably an alcoholic.”

  The doctor once again used sutures, staples, and ample amounts of super glue to keep the organ in place. Ted shut his eyes every time he head the staple click.

  “Doctor, isn’t in important to make sure the organs are attached correctly so that they work?”

  “Mister Brock, Zombies are dead. They don’t function, if I put an organ back in, or decide to keep it for my personal collection it’s irrelevant, the Zombie will still move around.”

  “Right of course, continue.” Ted stood rigid as he watched the doctor autopsy the Zombie.

  Everything seemed to be there as far as Ted knew, but he based his anatomy knowledge on the game Operation. The more the doctor cut into the Zombie the worse the smell got, and the more putrid liquids oozed out. Ted knew his breakfast would eventually reappear.

  “Oh this is interesting, get a close up if you can.” John reluctantly moved in.

  “Seems the original cause of death was not the Zombie virus. See all these little growths? This guy had very advanced cancer. He must have risen after he died. Class please make a note to find the primary cause of death if possible.”

  Ted breathed through his mouth to try and avoid the putrid odour coming from the Zombie. He watched in horror as the doctor took a bone saw and cut the top of the skull off to examine the brain. The doctor then placed a small metal chip in the brain. The chip, about a quarter inch in size and thinner than a paperclip, had a small green light.

  After the doctor placed the chip where he wanted it, he popped the skull cap back on, turning it left and right until in its proper position. Then he grabbed a tube of plumbing epoxy and lathered it onto the cut marks, after which he stapled it in place.

  “Excuse me, doctor Mengles what did you just do?”

  Ted had not seen anything this gruesome during the war. His therapy bill was going to sky rocket.

  “That, mister Brock, is an explosive tracking device. When we reintegrate the Zombies back into society we want to be able to keep tabs on them. Make sure they don’t go places they shouldn’t. If they do we press a button and the small bit of explosive is enough to kill them, but not a risk to humans.”

  “What kind of places are you protecting?” Ted wanted to take out a notebook and write some of this down, he felt like his life depended on it.

  “Schools, hospitals, restaurants, places of where contamination is a risk. It’s protocol, nothing to worry about.”

  Ted looked over at John when he noticed the camera light wavering. The doctor was performing a check on retinal attachment by removing the eyes. John looked pale, and Ted hoped he didn’t pass out, he couldn’t carry the damn camera and be the star. Looking back at the eyes being removed, he felt his knees get weak.

  Ted turned his head and threw up on John’s feet when the doctor removed several feet of the intestinal tract and emptied it onto a table. Several things fell out including fingers, toes, several eyes, brain matter, and partially chewed up rodents.

  “Last lesson of the day, Zombies will eat anything.”

  The doctor finished by sewing the Y incision shut, filling it with more plumbing epoxy, and then stapling it for good measure. The doctor also filled the pre-existing holes with something from a tub. The Zombie seemed to be totally unaware of what had been done to it.

  Ted regained his composure and looked into the tub, he wanted to stick his finger in it but resisted the urge.

  “Excuse me doctor, what are you using to patch up the Zombie?”

  The doctor grabbed the tub. “This is a special blend I created. It’s a mix of dry wall spackle, super glue, and plumbing epoxy. It is the best sealant so far, though it needs touching up every few months.”

  “Great thanks for explaining.” Ted plastered the fake smile on his face.

  “Well that’s all for here, you can move on to Phase Three. Class, see you tomorrow for virus cultivation and brain slicing.”

  Ted watched as men came in and got the Zombie back on its feet. The Zombie shambled ahead of them, exiting through a back door. Ted pushed John ahead of him, and they went down another gore infested hallway. The floor less sticky, but the scent significantly worse.

  Ted started to worry. He didn’t want to know what could possibly smell worse than a dissected Zombie. They got to a large door with no markings, just a latch and a small window. A bloody hand print smeared across it. Ted noted it the freshness of it. The men opened the door and
were greeted by a stern looking woman in glasses.

  “Bring it in.” The men took in the Zombie, and secured it to a chair in the middle of the room.

  As soon as they were done they quickly exited the room through a back door. John went in next, followed by Ted. Ted reached a hand out to introduce himself, but pulled it back when he saw her gloves.

  Ted tried to use his winning smile on the woman. She stood about five foot seven, gorgeous, and unnaturally skinny. She maintained the scowl on her face, and her jerky movements indicated her discomfort with the intrusion.

  The large and dirty room looked like it might have been a cafeteria at one point. Coolers with lids half on were strewn all about. Each one labeled with a different animal name.

  Then Ted spotted the table, several different coloured piles of rancid meat on it. The stench enough to make Ted vomit immediately.

  “Breathe through your mouth. It won’t help much, but there’s less chance you’ll choke on your own barf.” The woman smiled briefly, then put the scowl back in place.

  Ted and John transformed into mouth breathers in half a second, immediately realizing she had told them truth, and it didn’t make a difference. They both spent a few moments dry heaving in the corner.

  “I’m doctor Rexic, call me Anna. I’m the nutritionist in charge of Phase Three.”

  “A nutritionist? How is that really necessary? I thought Zombies ate people.”

  Ted immediately regretted the breath he had to take in order to speak. He made a mental note to stop asking questions.

  “Well, yes, but a Zombie will eat anything when it’s hungry enough. What I to do here is make sure their nutritional needs are met so when they are reintegrated back into society, they won’t eat people.” She let out an uneasy laugh. Ted and John just stared at her.

  Anna stood by the table of various meats in different stages of decomposition. Flies hovered, and maggots wiggled.

  Ted watched as John moved in with the camera to get a shot of the buffet from hell. Ted stayed put.