The Vampire's Mail-Order Bride

by Tee, Marian

  Your confused heartkeeper,

  Rhapsody

  Dear Rhapsody,

  On the contrary, there is no one in this world that I find as interesting as you, and before you dismiss these words as empty flattery, do be reminded that heartkeeping bids me to only speak the truth where you are concerned.

  That being said, let us turn our attention to one matter I confess to puzzling over for quite some time. How is it that your manner of speech is considerably more formal for one of your age?

  Yours,

  A vampire from the kingdom of Chalys

  Dear Sir,

  There is no great mystery behind my rather formal manner of speaking (or writing, as it were in this case).

  Due to the nature of Bethany's employment, I was frequently subjected to bullying in the last school I attended. They believed I would follow in her footsteps, so to speak. I was disinclined to prove them right and sought to be the opposite of their expectations by volunteering at a nearby convent.

  The first few weeks, I performed an assortment of routine household chores, helping the nuns in the kitchen and doing gardening. After a while, however, the Mother Superior asked if I would like to sit in for lessons with the novices. It is how I ended up learning Latin and, I must confess, sir - there was a time I seriously considered joining the order.

  Yours,

  Rhapsody

  Dear Rhapsody,

  And so it must bear repeating: you are, indeed, the most interesting creature I have the pleasure of meeting. The possibility of my heartkeeper being someone else's bride had naturally crossed my mind, but never did it occur to me that my rival would be none other than Jesus Christ himself.

  Yours,

  An incredulous but amused vampire from Chalys

  Dear Sir,

  Happy Easter.

  Yours,

  Rhapsody

  Dear Rhapsody,

  I apologize for not having written for weeks. I hope you enjoyed your first Easter weekend in the island. Sir Isaac assured me that it is a holiday celebrated with much fanfare by the locals.

  Moreso, thank you for the greeting. It is rare for you to write to me with neither purpose nor objective. If you would allow me to hazard a guess, mayhaps the idea of writing such a letter is not entirely your idea?

  Sincerely,

  A vampire from Chalys

  Dear Sir,

  Mr. Booth says I must practice expressing my affection. Do you reckon I succeeded?

  Yours,

  Rhapsody

  Dear Rhapsody,

  While I wish to always take your side on all matters, heartkeeping also forbids me to speak any untruth.

  Yours,

  A vampire from Chalys

  Dear Sir,

  It did not escape my notice that you did not actually answer my question.

  Yours,

  Rhapsody

  Dear Rhapsody,

  That in itself is already an answer.

  Yours,

  A vampire from Chalys

  Dear Sir,

  Point taken.

  Yours,

  Rhapsody

  DEAR RHAPSODY,

  A happy seventeenth birthday to you, milady. I hope you like the gift I have sent along with this letter. If there is anything else you wish for, you only have to let me know.

  Sincerely,

  A vampire from Chalys

  Dear Sir,

  Thank you very much for your gift. Something such as The Idiot's Guide to Manners is exactly what I was hoping for but could not make myself ask.

  Yours,

  Rhapsody

  Dear Rhapsody,

  If you were any other girl, milady, I would have thought you sarcastic.

  Yours,

  A vampire from Chalys

  Dear Sir,

  I am afraid the art of sarcasm still eludes me.

  Yours,

  Rhapsody

  Dear Sir,

  It has been sometime since your last letter. I hope all is well with you.

  Yours,

  Rhapsody

  Dear Rhapsody,

  I beg milady's forgiveness for causing you undue worry.

  Demons from Sulphur have been doing their damnedest to stir up trouble in our land, and much had to be done to remind them that their presence remains unwelcomed in Brimstone.

  I write also to let you know that I have just received your gift, which was indeed the surprise you intended it to be. I have long considered myself too old to celebrate birthdays, but if it is your wish to commemorate this occasion, then it shall be so.

  On another note, Sir Isaac informs me that you have moved on to the next phase of your studies. This means you have begun training for your duties as both my heartkeeper...and pet.

  While I'm certain the reference materials your guardian has provided are more than sufficient in explaining the rudiments of the latter, pray allow me this chance to address the matter with my own words.

  To become my pet means you will be providing me with your blood whenever I am in need of it. While you are obliged to call me Master in public, it is entirely your choice if you wish to continue doing so in our private communications.

  Some Masters are willing to share their pets with other vampires. This, however, is not something that will ever be expected of you. I shall be your only Master, and in return you alone shall be my pet. It is also very likely the only role you'll officially play in my life. While it would have been my greatest pleasure to acknowledge you as my heartkeeper, to do so shall only place a target on your head and put you in unnecessary danger.

  I know it is not an ideal arrangement, but I give you my word that I only have your best interests in mind.

  Yours to command,

  A remorseful future Master

  Dear Sir,

  You do not owe me an explanation. I trust you.

  Sincerely,

  A girl who already thinks of you as her Master

  P.S. Would you prefer I close my future letters as your pet?

  Dear Rhapsody,

  Indeed, I should have known you expected neither an apology nor an explanation.

  Yours,

  A vampire who remains impressed with your brevity

  P.S. 'Your pet' does rather have a nice ring to it. Do proceed with signing your letters as such if it pleases you.

  Dear Master,

  Is it true that you are planning to send me to a training school for pets?

  Sincerely,

  An unconvinced pet

  Dear Rhapsody,

  You are correct.

  Yours,

  A Master who always has your best interests at heart

  Dear Master,

  I am not happy about this, but I trust in your judgment.

  Sincerely,

  A resigned pet

  Dear Rhapsody,

  By the time you are reading this letter, I expect you and Sir Isaac are already en route to your school and future home for the next few years.

  I own a property not far from La Scala Legaturia, and your guardian shall move there for the duration of your schooling. Hopefully, the knowledge that Sir Isaac is within driving distance shall help put your mind at ease about this new chapter in your life.

  Yours to command,

  A Master who hopes for his pet's understanding

  Dear Rhapsody,

  I hope milday receives this letter in good health. It has been a while since you last wrote. Pray spare your Master a moment of your time and let him know how you fare.

  Sincerely,

  A Master who wonders if he still has a pet to call his own

  Dear Master,

  I shall not lie. I am still unhappy at being forced out of the island to board in this school.

  However, it also is not right that my deliberate neglect in writing you letters has made you miss me. I do apologize for that, and I shall make up for this inexcusable wrongdoing by writing to you every day.

  Pray let me know if this is s
ufficient. I may also write to you twice a day or even thrice a day if you so will.

  Sincerely,

  A pet who is once again devoted to her Master

  Dear Rhapsody,

  You are truly a pet beyond compare, and while your offer to write to me daily moves me so, I would be a selfish Master if I were to take so much of your time. All I desire is that you do not subject me to the same torment; although Sir Isaac does not neglect to keep me apprised of your activities, it is quite different when it is milady herself who sends me letters.

  Sincerely,

  A Master who is yours to command

  Dear Master,

  I apologize for disrupting our regular schedule for correspondence. I thought you should know that I have recently been accused of murder.

  Sincerely,

  Your pet

  Milady:

  While I have always found the brevity of your letters charming in its own way, it is entirely and woefully insufficient to simply write - and I quote - I thought you should know that I have recently been accused of murder.

  Pray speak more on this matter or your Master shall assume the worst.

  Sincerely,

  An extremely troubled vampire

  Dear Master,

  Consider me duly chastened, and I give you my word not to make the same mistake again. The details are as follows:

  A man has been found in the forest just outside the walls of our school. The victim had one side of his neck ripped apart, with visible markings of what appeared to be human bites.

  Sincerely,

  Your pet

  Dear Rhapsody,

  Just when I think there is nothing you can do to surprise your Master, you prove me wonderfully wrong.

  When I say that I wish for more details, it is not of the murder which I speak of. I wish to know how you, my heartkeeper, are faring.

  Sincerely,

  A still-worried vampire

  Dear Master,

  I am not troubled. I did not do it.

  Sincerely,

  Your pet

  Dear Rhapsody,

  I should have known that is all you have to say about it.

  Sincerely,

  A Master who has forgotten your talent for brevity

  Dear Master,

  I once again apologize for disrupting our regular schedule for correspondence. I write to inform you that Lady Zari has succeeded in clearing my name of murder.

  Sincerely,

  Your pet

  Dear Rhapsody,

  Do inform your friend that she only has to ask for any reward she so wishes, and if it is within my power to grant, then it shall be done.

  Sincerely,

  Your Master

  Dear Master,

  It appears that Lady Zari wishes to transfer to another school, but she is worried that her Master, Lord Alexandru Gheorgiu, might not give her permission to do so. Would you be able to do something about this?

  Sincerely,

  A pet who believes her Master is as all-powerful as he says he is

  Dear Rhapsody,

  It was originally my plan to keep my identity a secret for as long as possible and reveal it only when necessary. But to continue doing so would prohibit me from fully keeping my word to your friend, and that is something I do not believe my pet shall look kindly on.

  Enclosed with this letter are several documents for Lady Zari. One is from a school based here in Chalys, which is ready to welcome her as a student if she so wishes. The second is a note I have personally penned for your friend, and which you have my blessing to read. Indeed, by doing so you shall be consequently informed of the truth of my identity, which I hope you will not find undesirable in any way.

  Sincerely,

  Your concerned Master

  To Sir Isaac

  Knight of Sangre

  Has my heartkeeper confided to you of any troubles lately? She has been noticeably withdrawn in our last few exchanges, more so than her usual.

  Sincerely,

  Lord Mihail Gheorgiu

  Marquis of Sangre

  To His Lordship

  Marquis of Sangre

  I have reached out to milady as soon as I received his lordship's letter, and it is with the deepest regrets that I must say we have an unfortunate situation.

  Milady has apparently been harboring certain misassuptions about his lordship for some years. She appears to have been under the impression all this time that his lordship's physical countenance and, er, interests would be commensurate with what is normally expected from one who's had lived for centuries. To further elaborate, milord, her ladyship has assumed that your age would leave you disinterested in engaging in activities that are physical in nature. Instead, she believed that her primary responsibility as both pet and heartkeeper would be to provide his lordship with a healthy supply of high-quality blood through intravenous means.

  Pray command me as you will on this matter, milord, and until then I remain your humble and loyal servant,

  Sir Isaac Booth

  To Sir Isaac Booth

  Knight of Sangre

  Correct me if I am wrong with this, Booth.

  Are you saying Rhapsody believed she had been exchanging letters with a wrinkly old man all these years, and that being my heartkeeper was simply being on call for blood transfusions?

  And now that she knows none of those is true, and that she has ample reason to assume my dick is still in working order, this is what has made my heartkeeper suddenly cold towards me?

  Mihail

  To His Lordship

  Marquis of Sangre

  I'm afraid that is entirely correct, milord.

  Respectfully,

  Sir Isaac Booth

  To Sir Isaac Booth

  Knight of Sangre

  FUCK.

  Part Two

  Glossary of Terms,

  Names, and Places

  Academia Nu Exista (ANEX) – A self-governing school that officially does not exist; it is dedicated to aiding human students with special abilities to develop their full potential. Its administration is known to disapprove of relationships between humans and demons. Recent circumstances have also caused human-run management to severely minimize interaction with otherworlders of all kinds.

  Alexandru Gheorgiu – The younger brother of Mihail Gheorgiu, the Marquis of Sangre, and acknowledged as the most skilled hunter of rogue vampires and other types of otherworlders. His heartkeeper is Zari Baltimore, a soul seer.

  Asphodel – The only territory in the kingdom of Chalys that is open to non-citizens. A technology ban has been implemented in the last 200 years or so to limits its carbon footprint. This prohibits the use of the Internet and mobile phones among others as well as making any modern mode of transportation unavailable. Generally speaking, citizens of Asphodel as well as the rest of the human population are unaware that inhabitants of the other territories in the kingdom are otherworlders.

  Aquarius – An island territory located at the west of the kingdom's mainland and primarily inhabited by Ceti (singular; Cetus), a race of otherworlders that holds dominion over water. This territory is nominally ruled by The Demon Duke of Aquarius, whose son is one of the Galeré.

  Brimstone – The only territory in the kingdom that is under the absolute rule of a half-demon, Silviu Draghici. It is home to most otherworlders with mixed bloodlines.

  Chalys – A kingdom secretly inhabited by otherworlders; only one of its territories is open to human travelers. Access to other territories, namely Aquarius, Brimstone, Ciel, Lunare, Sangre, and Sulphur, is severely restricted. Both the otherworlder and human citizens making up the kingdom live and dress according to the customs and times of the Regency period.

  Charles Orpheline – A former soldier, Charles is now the Baron of Woodmere and father to three adopted daughters. All women have been saved from certain death, having been thrown away as infants because they were discovered to be ludifia.

  Ciel – The only territory th
at is permanently closed to all other territories of the kingdom. It is inhabited by a race of earth-bound angels and is under the nominal rule of the Duke of Ciel. Angels and demons are the only living races of otherworlder that are immortal. All others, however, possess longer lifespans than humans.

  Enforcers – A secret government agency of Asphodel that employs fighters to defend humans from otherworldly threats of all types. Certain missions or assignments may also require deployment of enforcers outside the kingdom.

  Galeré – The collective term used to refer to the three powerful half-demon marquises that had made a blood bond to devote their lives to protecting Silviu Draghici, the Duke of Brimstone. This consists of Mihail Gheorgiu of Sangre, Adrijan Vasilache of Aquarius, and Ilie Marcovici of Lunare.

  Georgina McCartney – The human future duchess and heartkeeper of Silviu Draghici, the Demon Duke of Brimstone. She is one of the fated potential heartkeepers for the Marquis of Lunare. The last verified sighting of Ms. McCartney was in one of the back roads leading out of Brimstone.

  Heartkeeping – A union that enables a demon or part demon to share the soul of his or her heartkeeper, thus preventing him or her from being completely chained to the demands of Hell. There may be more than one fated heartkeeper for a demon, but it is also possible for a demon to forcibly create such unions. Little is known about heartkeeping as most of the information is guarded zealously in Sulphur, one of the ducal territories making up Chalys and inhabited mainly by land-dwelling demons.

  La Scala Legaturia – A century-old and widely respected training school for pets in the mainland but which had since closed. Its former students include Zari Baltimore and Rhapsody Norwood.

  Lunare – The territory inhabited by shapeshipters of all types. It is under the nominal rule of the demon Duke of Lunare, whose son is one of the Galeré.

  Pet - Human girls who willingly enter a contract of service and forge a bond with vampire Masters. A pet's main responsibility is to feed her Master when necessary and obey his commands. Legacy pets are those whose families have been in service to vampire Masters for generations. First Mades are human girls from families whose previous generations do not have any other pets.

  Sangre – The territory inhabited by vampires and is under the nominal rule of the Duke of Sangre, whose son is one of the Galeré.