How Not to Date a Fae

by Stephanie Burke

  It pissed him off, his lack of attention in battle, so he decided to end this thing quickly.

  “Come on,” he muttered, wondering how many metal rocks the thing could shoot. “Let me just kick your arses and be done with this.”

  The man snarled and fired again, confident that he would hit him, while the second man fired as well.

  It was an easy feat for Cailte to pivot on one foot, deflecting the bullet easily with his dagger while his left arm brought up his sword like a bat and swatted the other projectile away.

  Before the men could recover, Cailte went into action. Using his legendary speed, he leapt across the room, spinning like a twister, moving so fast that he was just a reddish blur tearing through the room.

  He came to an abrupt halt before the first man, bent down so that he could shove his face right into his.

  “Hello,” Cailte breathed before the hilt of his sword crashed into the side of the other man’s head, dropping him like a rock. And then he was off again.

  The second man was now firing at the red-topped tornado that was Cailte, but the fae was unfazed. He deflected each projectile easily, sending them flinging toward the man’s head, making him drop to the ground in order to prevent his skull from being split.

  Cailte wasted no words on this one; he merely stopped on top of him. When the man lifted his head, Cailte swung his sword so that the flat of it impacted the top of his head.

  The man’s eyes widened as much as those oddly slanted eyes could and then dropped to the ground, out cold before Cailte raced from the room using all of his speed.

  Something was wrong. His gut told him, and he was never one to discount any premonitions the fates were willing to send him. He raced first to Ario’s bedroom, slinging the door open, calling for his lover. But the room was empty.

  “Not according to the plan, laddy,” Cailte hissed, his eyes narrowing as he looked around the empty room.

  But then a voice caught his attention. He tilted his head to the side and used his enhanced hearing to follow the sound back to the source. It was his lover’s grandfather. And his words sent a cold chill down Cailte’s spine.

  Turning he sped down the hall and onto the first floor, his eyes frantic as he momentarily forgot how to get to the back deck. But his lover’s strong voice led him and, with his face twisted in anger, his clan’s war cry on his lips, he raced toward the back of the house.

  The glass door was no impediment to his charge. With a swing of his sword, the glass shattered into a million tiny pieces, and Cailte raced through them as if they were as harmless as raindrops.

  “Ario!” he bellowed, and then froze, his mind not believing the images his eyes were sending to his brain.

  * * *

  Squirrels! There were squirrels everywhere.

  They raced toward Grandfather, chattering and squawking, and swarmed the man.

  Ario stared, still unable to move, as a brown wave completely rushed his grandfather. The man let out an undignified screech, a sound Ario had never heard the man make in all of his years living with him at the temple, and then he fell flat on his back.

  The men that were with Grandfather were under attack too, Ario realized when no one rushed to aid Grandfather.

  The men were hopping and swatting at a horde of bloodthirsty rabbits and sparrows. The birds were going for the men’s eyes while the rabbits tore bloody gouges out of ankles and shins. Ario winced in sympathy when one particular bunny bite caused a thug to tip over and slam his head on the deck, gripping his Achilles tendon with one hand and slapping at a persistent sparrow trying to rip his earlobe off.

  If it hadn’t been such an apocalyptic scene, Ario would have found it hilarious. As it was, Ario was still trapped, unable to move because of the strength of Grandfather’s spell.

  Grandfather screeched in Japanese as the squirrels swarmed up his robes, up his sleeves, and around his back. The old man was rolling on the roughly hewn planks, no doubt getting splinters and bruises over flesh that had never felt the touch of anything rough. His eyes were glowing, leeching from a near black brown to an eerie, glowing red, as he was continually assaulted by the furry animals.

  “Enough!” he bellowed and, for a moment, the squirrels stilled.

  “Oh, I don’t think so.”

  Ario looked frantically around and spied Merrick happily dusting Grandfather’s thugs to the point where they just lay on the deck, eyes closing sleepily as drool ran from parted lips.

  Merrick flittered over to Ario’s grandfather and placed his hands on his hips. The little pixy’s face was red with anger. “How dare you interfere?”

  “Me?” Grandfather roared, rising to his feet as if cables were pulling him, knocking squirrels left and right as he shook them from his person. “I? interfere?”

  “I don’t see anyone else tossing around foreign spells,” Merrick snarled, rising up to glare at Grandfather, right in his eyes.

  “Foreign…”

  “That is what I said!” Merrick was screaming. “How dare you?”

  Before anyone could answer, the glass door exploded into a shower of sparkling crystals and, in the midst of the chaos, a red-headed demon emerged.

  “Ario,” he snarled, and Ario felt his heart leap for joy as he recognized his lover standing there.

  He was sliced in places, bloodied by the small shards of glass that rained down on him, but there were no gunshot wounds. The man appeared whole and healthy, albeit quite angry.

  “Mine!” he roared, his chest heaving as he placed himself between Ario and those who would do him harm.

  “He belongs to me!” Grandfather bellowed, but Cailte paid him no mind, walking over to Ario as if Grandfather and his spells did not exist. He reached out and caressed his lover’s face, Ario melting at the touch as his Cailte began to speak again.

  “No one binds what is mine,” he muttered darkly, as he pressed his palm to Ario’s heart.

  Again, as he had the first time they had made love, Ario felt a rush of tingly warmth pass through his body. He felt it encircle the cold bindings that were his grandfather’s magic and press against its enslaving presence.

  His grandfather’s bindings tightened, almost painfully so, as they were assaulted by Cailte’s magic, but then Ario felt his magic begin to rise and fight against his grandfather’s spell.

  Ario trembled as the battle was fought deep within him, his grandfather’s magic lashing out to cause pain at the defiance Ario showed. But even as he twisted in pain, he felt his magic combine with Cailte’s. Together their magic grew almost unbearably hot and began to melt the cold bindings his grandfather had set into place.

  Ario could feel the spell lessening as movement returned to his fingers. He wiggled them as he struggled to open his mouth, to speak.

  “No!” Grandfather was bellowing again. “This cannot be!”

  Grandfather began to weave his fingers in a complicated pattern, and the small animals that had been ready to attack ran away from the cold that radiated from the old man’s magic.

  “You can’t…” Merrick was wide-eyed and pissed at this open defiance of pixy magic. “This will not happen!”

  “My magic is stronger than yours, tiny creature.” Grandfather was all but glowing as he spoke. “You cannot hope to best me.”

  And the animals retreated.

  “Impossible!” Merrick was almost spinning in his anger. He waved his hands, and suddenly the sound of pounding hooves filled the forest. Before Ario could even blink, there was a crashing sound, and a herd of horned deer came pounding onto his property. He watched, wanting to scream out in denial as the animals rushed his grandfather and the remaining men with him.

  But a gesture of Grandfather’s hand sent the racing deer dodging around them, leaping elegantly aside as if his grandfather had put up some magical barrier that the deer refused to touch.

  “Not enough!” Merrick was snarling. He snapped his fingers again, and this time it was foxes that came to his call. Red and br
own, the small vulpines bared their teeth and dove at the humans that threatened one of their own.

  And again, Grandfather waved his hand and the foxes, beautiful in their sleek bodies, turned away, cowering in fear.

  “There is nothing you can do, little man, to prevent me from claiming my own.” Moving almost as fast as Cailte, Grandfather moved in front of Merrick and sent the small pixy slamming to the ground with one wave of his hand.

  “No,” Ario managed from within the protective walls of Cailte’s embrace. “No!”

  He closed his eyes and concentrated, pushing as hard as he could with his untried power. The raw energy surged forward and twisted around Cailte’s, forming a glowing wave that washed over him, that finally and painfully tore at the bindings of blood and magic that Grandfather had used.

  Ario was screaming as he felt the heat of the combined magic assault the cold of his grandfather’s spell, screaming as he felt it finally give and begin to rip from his soul, tearing huge gouges and leaving him vulnerable.

  “No!” Ario was screaming, shaking his head as he felt his magic flow out of control. “Kami-sama, no!”

  All around them the animals that cowered fearfully away from the clash of magic suddenly became amorous, their pupils dilating as they rushed to seek their mates. Grunting and squealing filled the air as Ario’s magic shot out and touched them, and they began a desperate mating.

  “Ario! Control it!”

  Cailte, he realized over his pain and loss of control. It was his lover, his Cailte, calling to him. Sucking in a deep breath, Ario let out a primal scream as the last of his grandfather’s magic within him snapped, and the spell was no more.

  But its aftermath was devastating. Ario had no control. There were huge, gaping holes where his grandfather’s spell was torn free, and his soul felt rent and bleeding. He whimpered as the artificial stiffness that had compelled his body to obey his grandfather’s words gave way, and he found himself collapsing into Cailte’s arms.

  “Oh, boyo,” Cailte was muttering. “What have they done to you?”

  Unable to answer, Ario lay in his lover’s arms, body wracked with chills as he struggled to pull his soul together.

  “You did something amazingly stupid, boy.” Grandfather was looming over them, and Ario just didn’t have enough energy left to give a damn what the old man would do to him.

  But Grandfather was shaking his head and glaring at Cailte. “An honorable warrior,” his grandfather acknowledged. “But ultimately your defiance is useless.”

  “Please, Grandfather,” Ario gasped, reaching up with shaking arms as if to shield Cailte from what his grandfather was about to do.

  Cailte was now growling under his breath, one hand reaching for the sword he’d cast aside to catch Ario, his purple eyes promising death if anything else would befall Ario.

  “Foolish,” Grandfather rapped out before he raised his hands. “Foolish young ones.” He was about to begin his gestures again, building a spell that Ario could feel resonate through the yew beneath them and grow in intensity as his grandfather focused in on both of them, when suddenly a hush filled the forest. A stillness unlike any Ario had ever felt before settled over them, calming the frantically mating animals, the poor pixy struggling to rise to his feet, and his grandfather’s hands.

  There was a rush of wind and suddenly, almost as if from thin air, there appeared a huge white wolf. Grandfather’s eyes grew almost comically wide as the graceful creature padded forward.

  Eyes that shone like rainbows passed over Grandfather before focusing on Ario, eyes that he felt peered beyond the flesh and deep into his shredded soul.

  Dear child. The feminine voice spoke softly in his mind, soothing the chaos that his whole being had become. You struggle so hard. Then the huge head swiveled to stare at Cailte. And you found one of the fated ones as a mate.

  Cailte’s eyes widened, and Ario realized that his lover could also hear the words the wolf was speaking into his mind.

  “Fae no longer,” Cailte replied respectfully, though truthfully he did not appear shocked to have a wolf speaking in his head.

  Almost as if reading his confusion, Cailte looked down at the man in his arms and grinned. “I can speak to all animals, Ario, m’love. Apparently including divine ones.”

  There was the sound of lilting laughter in his head, and Ario swore he could feel sunbeams and rainbows in that trilling laughter.

  Then the wolf turned toward Grandfather, who pulled himself upright and gave her a deep bow.

  Blood of my blood, she chided softly. Is this course of action really necessary?

  “He is of my blood,” Grandfather replied as he rose to stand his full height before this great white wolf. “He must do his duty to the bloodline.”

  After a moment of silence, the great white wolf, Amaterasu, nodded softly. Not totally corrupt, then, she decided, and Grandfather winced. But this will not do.

  Walking over to Ario, she pressed a paw to his chest, right on top of his heart, on top of Cailte’s palm that still lingered protectively there.

  Strong in magic, both of you, she decreed, and suddenly Ario felt his magic surge forward, this time to envelop Cailte’s magic once more. The combined magics grew hot, almost scalding, and just as suddenly, the warm rush of the wolf’s magic joined them.

  Together the combined energies rushed over his soul, sliding over the torn bits and missing pieces, and filled them with the warmth of the sun and the joyous sensation of laughter, and a deep passion that only came from awareness of growing love.

  The wolf pulled away and Ario felt… healed. He tried to lift his head, but it flopped backwards against Cailte’s arm. Ario felt too drained to move.

  Rest, young one, Amaterasu urged before turning to the downed pixy. You belong to the Elder ones of this place, the wolf said as Merrick struggled to rise up.

  The wolf gave a small yip, and a white glow encompassed the small pixy. Then, quick as a blink, the glow was gone, leaving the pixy looking full of vigor once more, wings fluttering as he flew off of the ground.

  You do your duty well, the wolf intoned, and Merrick gave her a small bow.

  “I take my duties seriously.” He rolled his eyes toward Grandfather. “What are you going to do about that one?”

  That one, indeed. The white wolf moved toward Grandfather. Grandfather stood tall and proud, no emotion showing in his face.

  You do what you feel is best for your clan and your bloodline, said the wolf. You keep to the old ways, and for that you have been blessed. But in your dealings with my young one -- it was clear from the way she turned her head to look at Ario who she meant -- you have been lax.

  “I have done my best,” Grandfather argued calmly with his patron goddess.

  That you have, and yet you have a viper in your nest, O-Komiko.

  “I have dealt with him.” Grandfather acknowledged his mishandling of his legitimate grandson.

  Yet you deal so wrongly with this one.

  “I but follow the old ways…”

  Yet the old ways do not apply to this one, O-Komiko. The old ways will not work at all.

  “So I am at an impasse.” Grandfather sighed.

  Not really. The wolf chuckled. Know you that the young one was cursed?

  “Until recently, no,” Grandfather grumbled, acknowledging the fact that he did not indeed know everything.

  He was cursed and driven from the temple. I allowed this because he had to come here to meet his destiny. As she spoke, she nodded toward Cailte. I endowed the one whom I chose for my bloodline with the ability to break the curse this little one was under.

  “Cailte?” Ario breathed, and the massive wolf’s head shifted toward him, her eyes twinkling.

  “The foreign magics?” Grandfather looked almost appalled.

  He was due to rise and prepare the way for the fae to once more inhabit this land and right several wrongs, O-Komiko. And the young one of my blood was needed here so that I would have representa
tion in this new place when magics once more begin to rise.

  “You led him here?”

  As if there is such a thing as coincidence, the wolf chided gently.

  “But… but he is needed to perform his duties at home.”

  No. The wolf’s answer was final. He has suffered, and through his suffering gained tremendous strength. No, O-Komiko, this young one has forged himself a place right here.

  “The bloodline…”

  Will not die out, the wolf stated. You have seen to it that this young one has been protected and flourished once he was removed from your temple.

  Ario’s eyes widened as he shifted his body to stare at his grandfather. And oddly enough, there was a deep flush on the old man’s face.

  “I have not…”

  You have so, the wolf chuckled. You reared him according to your traditions, which I allowed because it tempered his strength for my purposes. But his time in the temple serving the people who still remember the O-Kami is over.

  “But Tama’s curse…”

  Because of your protection of this young one, you shall have a solution to your problem.

  “And that would be…?”

  It is time for you to take up your old mantle, O-Kami of the Tagata Jinja.

  Grandfather’s eyes widened, but then he nodded and gave the wolf a deep bow.

  I know it is not a solution to your liking, but it is one that you will use to ensure the sanctity of your shrine.

  “And Tama?”

  The duplicitous one? She chuckled. He will be released from his curse in due time, to carry on the bloodline. And then his usefulness for your temple will cease to be.

  “I am to -- to cast him out?” Grandfather stuttered over the words, but he spoke them just the same.

  And rear this new one with the strength and cunning of yourself and of this one. She nodded toward Ario. Your line will not die out, but you will have to work to purify it.

  She turned and began to walk again toward the woods of cypress and yew. I suggest you start now.