Complete Indelible Love Series

by Cee, DW

  “What Max was not happy with yesterday morning, was my wavering.”

  “I don’t recall you wavering.”

  “I didn’t tell you to go to hell, but instead I listened to all you had to offer. And if I were honest with myself, I did wonder for a brief second whether or not I could go away with you without Max finding out. Therefore, I did more than waver. To Max, I cheated on him and because of that, he decided to leave for his Mexico ‘missions’ trip today instead of next month.”

  One damn question ruined both their lives. I didn’t know how, but I had to help Jane.

  “Al mentioned an engagement ring?”

  “We don’t know what it was. Becky brought up the possibility that the Tiffany box I received as a birthday present might have been an engagement ring. It doesn’t matter since I threw it back in his face. I’m going to be completely honest with you.”

  “All right.”

  “I know I’m being unfaithful to Max again by saying this, but I am attracted to you, or so I believe.”

  I guess this conversation was necessary. “Thanks. I ditto the sentiment, especially the ‘or so I believe’ part.”

  “Since you’ve shown interest, I have wondered if a relationship would be possible with you, easier with you. But, I’ve never ever thought that a relationship would be better with you.”

  “Ditto.”

  “What do you mean, ‘ditto?’ You’re not even in a relationship right now so how could you think a relationship would not be better with me?”

  “Next...” I was sorry for my wrongdoings, but I wasn’t up for a verbal brawl. We needed to get everything on the table and decide where to go from here. “I’ll be honest with you. I regretted what I did yesterday morning. I shouldn’t have tempted you, I shouldn’t have encouraged you to cheat on your boyfriend, and I’ll be the first to admit that I was an asshole for doing what I did. You’re hurting. I’m confused. You need time to get over Max. I need time to clear out my head. I see only one solution.”

  “And what would that be?” Was I going to go there? After all the hurt and confusion, was this the best solution?

  This could’ve been another epic and stupid move on my part, but this curiosity between Jane and me would forever linger unless we did something about it. Delaney and I were done. She’d moved on. Jane and Max were technically separated, though I knew there was a chance they could reconcile. Jane and I needed absolute confirmation that we weren’t meant to be together. There was only one solution for us.

  “I’m not going to let go of this opportunity, Jane. We both need to satiate this curiosity and be done with it—let’s date. I’d like for us to go out, have a good time, and see where this may lead. No pressure—if anything, we’ll have our easy-going friendship to fall back on during this date. What do you say? Can we go on one date?”

  We agreed to my rash idea. This might very well be our worst mistake ever, but we believed it was something that needed to be done.

  A show, a dinner, and a shopping spree for the twins was what it took before we could feel comfortable with ourselves and with each other. Once we fell back on our friendship, we were golden. Knowing how much Jane loved shoes, I bought her a pair, and we walked back to the hotel as two friends who enjoyed the afternoon together.

  The awkwardness returned once we reached my room. We were in an enclosed space, Jane was nervous, and I was uncomfortable as hell. I didn’t think anything could get worse than the position we were in right now, so I went in for the kill.

  “I need to know,” was all I said before placing my lips on hers. At first we were like two teenagers, mouths closed, kissing for the first time. This kiss felt all wrong, but I pressured Jane to open her mouth and once she did, all hell broke loose and we split apart immediately. “Fuck! On a scale of 1-10, how incestuous was that kiss?”

  “Off the chart at about one million!”

  Crazy. Sick. Absofreakinlutely disgusting! That’s what our kiss was, and now I knew. We both knew, we understood, and we could move on without any more questions looming. Our date today was like a science experiment gone horribly wrong—like blowing up the laboratory kind of wrong!

  “You think Jake will be upset we were together?”

  “You’re more worried about what your brother will think when you have a boyfriend to appease?”

  “Who knows if I have a boyfriend anymore?” The white flag Jane was waving shouldn’t have happened. I was responsible for her misery. I would do my damnedest to make it right for her.

  Jake interrupted our debacle of a date with happy news of another Reid gracing our lives. He called Jane to give her the good news, and after a brief explanation as to why Jane and I were together, we hopped on a plane headed for home.

  Jane and I had a good long talk about us, Delaney, and Max and promised to aid one another in our endeavors to get our lives back on track. Jane had a longer road ahead of her since I pretty much understood my “relationship” with Delaney as dead.

  “Max loves you and once you get through this, you two will be on to your forever. I will do whatever I can to help you. Jake will also do his best to get you back in good graces with Max.”

  “Where did we go so wrong? What made us think that we were so attracted to one another, and for so long?”

  “For me, aside from the fact that you are a beautiful woman, I loved the ease of our friendship. I thought this was what a relationship should be. I hated those feelings of worry and angst. I hated even more feeling so possessive and pissed off when things didn’t go my way with Delaney. There were too many severe highs and lows whenever I was around your cousin.”

  “For me, I don’t think I ever got over my childhood crush of you. When you started showing me attention, it was flattering, and curiosity got the best of me.”

  “We were both fools.”

  “We were, Donovan. I just hope our future partners will forgive easily.” Jane spoke casually, but worry was written all over her face. “When did you realize you were in love with Laney?”

  “I don’t know that I’m in love with that blonde-haired blue-eyed beauty.”

  “You’re so full of shit! I wish I had a mirror to show you the freakin’ smile you had on your face when you called her your ‘blonde-haired, blue-eyed beauty.’ You’re pathetically in love with her!”

  “Whatever this feeling is, I believe I first noticed it when I took her up to my beach house. Then there was Ashley’s wedding, and soon after, your brother had a sit-down with me and made me open my eyes.”

  “A beach house? What? When did that happen and how come I didn’t know about this?”

  “I was driving by this area one day before we went to Hawaii and I happened to see this cool little shack of a house. The funny thing was, I didn’t think to buy it till I got to Hawaii, and I saw how much your cousin loved the water. Something about her surfing in the ocean convinced me to put in an offer on that house and it got accepted right away.”

  “So you bought this house for my cousin?”

  “I can’t say I bought it for your cousin. Somehow, I liked the thought of her there with me. Crazy, huh?”

  “That’s what love does to you. Makes you do crazy things. Have you taken Laney there?”

  “Yeah.” I probably had that same idiotic smile reminiscing about our time at the beach. “We had an ideal afternoon. I should’ve admitted my feelings to myself and to her that day. Then I wouldn’t have messed up your life and mine.”

  “We’ll figure it out, Donovan.”

  “Yeah,” I sighed. “I hope so.”

  We took a car straight to the hospital, and it was at this time I knew I had a decision to make. Everything was crystal clear with Jane. She wondered no more about us; we would stay lifelong friends. What I had to ask myself was what I was going to do about my blonde-haired blue-eyed beauty. Did I want to pursue a relationship with her? If so, how was I going to woo her away from Michael when I lived on a differe
nt continent? Would I try for a long distance relationship? Did she even like me? If so, would she give up Michael for a chance at happiness with me? How would Delaney react if she knew what had happened between me and Jane?

  “Why are you shaking your head?” Jane asked.

  “Are you going to tell Max about our kiss?” Jane didn’t answer. “Am I being a chickenshit if I ask you to keep that kiss between the two of us? We can say we went out. Can we just omit the kiss?” Jane nodded in agreement. “I mean it’s not like either of us enjoyed the kiss. It would be one thing if we did. Since we thought it was disgusting, it shouldn’t even warrant a mention, right?”

  “I agree.” I knew there was a reason why our friendship worked.

  “Good.” I changed subjects. “Jake tell you anything else about Emily?”

  “No, but I hope she’s had the baby by now. You think it’ll be a boy or a girl?”

  “I’m sure whatever it is, he or she will be much loved.”

  We arrived at the hospital in good time and hurried to meet the new Reid. Jane asked the nurse for Emily’s information, and part of my problem would’ve resolved itself seamlessly had I not had one more question for Jane.

  “What?” she asked as I pulled her into an empty room next to Emily’s.

  “Just humor me, one last time. I need to be 100% sure that this isn’t it for us before I decide what I’m about to decide.” The rest of the flight home, I’d decided it was time to change directions—literally and figuratively. I was going to fight for the girl who wouldn’t leave my thoughts, and I’d do it from London where we could be in contact with one another daily. Once we were back together, Delaney wouldn’t be able to deny the feelings we had for one another. “We were drunk on emotion when we first kissed.” This was probably another bad idea, but I didn’t think it would hurt to ask for this last favor. It wasn’t as if anyone would know. “It was like we were on the rebound. Let me try this when we are both of a clear mind and decide this is definitely not it.”

  “NO!” Jane begged and laughed simultaneously. I started laughing with her. As soon as I had Jane in my arms, I knew she wasn’t the woman for me. She didn’t fit like Delaney did, and nothing about Jane stirred by senses. Neither one of us was attracted to each other.

  I got very close to a giggling Jane and whispered, “This is a shit of an idea, huh?”

  She nodded her head in the affirmative!

  “...Miss, that’s not the right room. It’s the one next door...”

  “OK...sorry...”

  That voice! I knew it. It was my heaven. It would be my hell if I was correct. I caught the tail end of her ponytail flying out of the room and that choking, falling into an endless pit feeling lodged back into my gut. Delaney watching me holding her cousin in my arms was karma, or perhaps Max Davis, kicking my ass and laughing its ugly head. I let go of Jane in search for Delaney.

  Right, left, front, back—she was nowhere.

  Hoping she was in Emily’s room, I ran in and scared everyone with my abrupt entrance. She was still nowhere. Instead of finding the girl I desperately needed to see, I found that guy, Michael. What was going on? Why was he here at a family event? Had Delaney brought him? Was he here to be introduced to all the Reids? I wanted to kick his ass, grab him by the jugular, tell him he was with my woman, throw him out, and tell him never to lay a hand on Delaney. Jake, seeing the anger and confusion in my eyes, walked over to me and had me in a loose hold.

  “What happened? Is Delaney here with this guy?”

  “Lower your voice.” Jake warned needlessly since this guy was busy talking to Roland and another English man who was on speakerphone.

  “What the fuck is going on, and where’s Delaney?”

  “What do you mean? Last I talked to her, she was on her way here, but I haven’t seen her yet.”

  “So she didn’t come with this guy?”

  “I’m unsure but I don’t think so. He’s appears to be looking for her as well. When did you see Delaney?”

  “I don’t know for sure if it was her, but I heard her. I know she’s in the hospital somewhere.”

  Our questions were answered when she appeared in the door and this guy, Michael, ran over and confessed his undying love for her. It pissed me off to watch him fawn all over her. That should’ve been me, not him, with her.

  “Stay calm, Donovan. I don’t know what this is all about, but obviously the two of them didn’t come here together. Let’s resolve this mess without any collateral damage.” My buddy still had his grip on me. “What did you do to her when you’ve had no contact with her? She’s bawling.”

  “Shit, Jake. Help me. How do I get out of this mess? I’ve ruined everything.”

  “Let’s wait till we get Laney alone, away from Michael. You can tell her how you feel and see if she’ll accept your love.”

  “Would you be OK with leaving now?” I heard Delaney say in the course of all of our conversations.

  “Now?” I asked, though she refused to look at me.

  “But you just got here.” Emily was disappointed. Emily, please convince her to stay. Please.

  The tears came in full force as Delaney bent down to whisper something in Emily’s ears. By the look of disappointment in Emily’s eyes, I knew Delaney was talking about my supposed kiss with Jane. Though it was bad that she saw what almost happened, I was happy that she was crying over the misunderstanding. I’d pull her aside and explain everything. How could she not forgive me when she learned of the truth and I declared my love for her?

  “What the hell happened to you? You never came back after you chased after Laney, and you look like death right now.”

  After losing my blonde-haired blue-eyed beauty to that English guy, I went on a very long run to let out all the anger and frustration. When I could run no more, I ended up at Jake’s house.

  “Can you talk? When are you headed back to the hospital?”

  “I came home to give the kids a nap. Come in. Can I get you a drink?”

  “Yeah. Some water would be nice.”

  “What happened?” Jake set a bottle of water in front of me, and had me recount the entire story starting with scene at the hospital in front of the elevator.

  “...and she left,” was about all I could say.

  “And you let her leave? Did it occur to you to drag her back to the cul-de-sac and force her to listen to everything you had to say? Did I not teach you anything about chasing after your woman to the ends of the earth until she became yours?”

  Jake got the chuckle he was after. “She was crying. She didn’t want to hear what I had to say and most importantly, she was with the man she wanted to be with—and that man wasn’t me. What else could I do but let her leave?”

  “Didn’t you think it was odd that seeing you with Jane broke my cousin’s heart to a point where she cried the entire time she was in Emily’s room? I didn’t know who she thought she was kidding. The tears were rolling down her cheek every time I glanced at her. What do you think made her cry? The birth of JR? Because she had missed James? Because she was happy Michael had chased after her?”

  “The last five miles of my run was the recalling and dissecting of every scene, every word spoken while I was with her. Either she was sad to see us end, or she was crying for joy that she was done with me. Common sense tells me it’s the former, but my self-esteem tells me it’s the latter. I feel like Anderson Silva in a brutal MMA bout—KO’ed and done for good.”

  “Put away your violin and get up. You’re not done. You’re not even close to being done. You need to get over to London, declare your intentions to my cousin and win her over. I’m counting on you to join our families, and everyone on the cul-de-sac supports you. I wish I could fly out there with you, and there’s a chance I may uproot my family and help you in Europe, but for now, all I can tell you is to man up! You’ve made your mistakes. You’ll apologize to all affected parties. You’ll go after the woman who was meant
to be yours.”

  That all sounded good, but the question that begged to be asked was, “What do you mean you’ll uproot your family and fly to Europe with me?”

  That’s when our conversation turned positive.

  My thoughts on Delaney were like a seesaw in the park. One day I was up and felt as if I could touch the sky with my enthusiasm, and the next day I was alone on the seesaw, sunken into the pit, unable to dig myself out. The other night when Jane and I visited Jake and Emily, I wanted to stick my head in the sand and stay there until I suffocated an ugly death from too much sand up my nose. I tried to sound upbeat, at least for Jane’s sake, but no one was fooled. Jake and I did our best to help her get to Mexico, but in the end, it was Nick who was able to get her a pass into their camp.

  Since Jane left for Mexico and she was working hard to save her relationship, I decided to visit Delaney in London again. I wasn’t successful, but whooped for joy when I learned she wasn’t purposely avoiding me this time. Jake explained that Delaney had been in New York with Aunt Babs. Since none of the tactics I’d tried thus far had worked, I came up with a new game plan. I’d recruit allies and make this fight a little easier.

  “Hello?”

  “Hi Aunt Babs. It’s me, Donovan.”

  “Hi Donovan!” At least Aunt Babs sounded happy to hear from me. “How nice of you to call.”

  “I should’ve called earlier...I’ve been wanting to call you since you got back from New York, but I needed to think things through a little more before talking to you.”

  “How can I help you?”

  “May I take you to dinner one night this week? I have a lot to ask you and I need some advice concerning that blonde-haired blue-eyed beauty of yours.”

  Aunt Babs laughed at me.

  “Henry is working late tonight. I can do dinner tonight or in about two weeks.”

  “I’ll take tonight.” I was desperate for some answers. “There’s a great restaurant on the ground level of the firm’s building. Can I meet you there at seven?”