“I love you too. Thank you for taking care of me last night.”
“Where else would I be?” he said, and then without much effort at all, he sat up straight and, still inside of me, lifted me in his arms and carried me into the shower. He carefully placed me down as hot cum ran down my leg before the sprays of the hot water washed it away. Ben began washing my long hair as I took some body wash and began washing his chest.
We finished our shower, and I stepped out first and then handed Ben a towel. I quickly dried off and stepped out of my room to call for Leah. When I didn’t hear anything in return, I stepped back into my bedroom, closing the door behind me. Ben stood in the middle of my bedroom, looking like a male model with just a towel wrapped around his waist. He flashed me a sexy wink, and I nearly came again with another orgasm.
“You don’t have to worry about your sister. She had an early class this morning, and before you worry, she knows I stayed last night.”
“Wow! You are talking about my sister, right?”
“The one and only one you have. She loves you and was very worried about you when she couldn’t calm you down. She didn’t know how to help you, so she called me, and I came right over. You scared me, love, and if you’re up to talking, I would really like to know what upset you so much to put you in that state.”
“I will, I promise. I’ve already missed my first class, and I’m too tired to deal with the rest. Give me a few minutes to e-mail my teachers, and then I’ll get dressed, and we can go to breakfast. How does that sound?”
“Sounds like a plan. Let me get dressed, and then I’ll wait for you downstairs.” He gave me a quick kiss and then walked over to where his clothes were.
Oh, Ben, I will tell you everything about last night. I just hope you don’t think I’m totally nuts after I do.
After writing my e-mails, I quickly found a pair of jeans and a light sweater to put on. I’m sure my shoes were still wet, and thankfully I had a pair of sneakers here at the house. I took a few extra minutes to dry and style my hair and even apply a little makeup. I covered up my blotchy eyes as best as I could and did a quick glance in the mirror before walking downstairs to find Ben.
I didn’t see him in the kitchen or in the living room. I borrowed one of Leah’s jackets and gathered my stuff. I locked the door behind me, and that’s when I saw Ben with his father, of all people.
My first and only encounter with his father was awkward and a little intimidating, but after what I went through last night, I wasn’t going to feel that way again. I straightened my shoulders and walked toward Ben, who clearly was agitated with his father showing up here at my house.
I placed my hand on Ben’s back to let him know that it’s going to be okay. He placed his arm around my shoulder and then looked back to his father.
“Father, you remember my girlfriend, Hallie, right?” his tone was clipped.
“Of course, I do.” He extended his hand out to me, and I shook it in return. “How have you been? I hope all is well.” His manners were perfect, but there was a hint of coldness behind his words.
“I’m doing well, thank you for asking. Um, we were just about to leave. Can we, Ben? Or do you need a few extra minutes?” I asked, looking to Ben and ignoring his father’s glares that he was now aiming at the two of us.
“I’m ready, and my car is open. Why don’t you go and wait for me? I won’t be but a minute more.”
“You sure?” I asked.
“Yeah, everything is great,” he said and then kissed me for good measure.
I did as he asked and placed my bag and purse in the backseat and then got into the front, waiting on Ben. I couldn’t hear what he was saying to his father, but he didn’t look like the boyfriend who I love and adore. This version was stiff and curt with every word he said. His father was his equal in height, and they looked like two bulls ready to wage war on the other. Ben threw his hand in the air and began walking away from his father.
As soon as he got into the car, he slammed the shift handle into the drive position before his father could say anything more. His hands were white-knuckling the steering wheel. I’d never seen Ben so angry before.
“Ben, what was that all about? And how did your father know where I live?”
“It’s nothing you have to worry about. Forget about him. Let’s go eat, and we can talk about you and me.”
“You always say that when it comes to your father. Why don’t you want me to know him? Or your mother, for that matter? Are they so terrible?”
“It’s complicated and ugly, and I don’t ever want them to taint what we have. Please, Hallie, just trust me on this, okay?”
“Okay, I will,” I said nothing more, and we drove out of Cary and toward Chapel Hill. By the time we got back into town, it was time for lunch. We decided on Al’s Burger Shack. I don’t know where Ben puts it, but he not only finished his huge double cheeseburger, but began picking on mine. I was full after the first half and gladly shared the rest with my hungry boyfriend. He sensed my amusement and wiped his mouth with a napkin before taking a big sip of his soda.
“Sorry, baby, I didn’t eat much last night and we did skip breakfast this morning, but I’m not complaining at the treat I did get to have.”
I closed my eyes at the memory of pleasuring Ben, and I shivered in anticipation at doing that again. “You pervert. Here, eat another fry,” I said and laughed, and then he took my hand and brought it up to his mouth to kiss.
“So, should we address what happened last night? I hope you don’t think I forgot,” he said.
“Just like I haven’t forgotten about the ‘Oliver’ text I received from you? So, who wants to go first?” I asked.
“You. Now tell me what happened.” His happy banter vanished, and he leaned in forward to take my hands in his and said, “You can tell me anything. I love you, and I’m here.” He kissed me and gave me the courage I needed. He always does.
“Okay, here it goes. As you know, yesterday was my last session with Dr. Brewer. We agreed just like last time that if I need her for anything, she’s just a phone call away. I was feeling pretty good about my decision and decided to pick up some flowers and visit my mother’s grave. I haven’t been there in a while, and for weeks now, my mom has been the one and only subject discussed with my therapist. Sometimes I do talk about you, but mostly my mom. Dr. Brewer is really happy for me, and she said I have come a long way since losing both my parents.”
“I love hearing that, Hallie. There is no shame seeking help from others.”
“I know that, and I promise you that I’m really okay, Ben, but last night something happened, and it just really freaked me out.”
“Take a breath and take your time. Tell me exactly what happened.”
“I arrived at the cemetery and parked my car. I had picked up flowers for my mom and was going to sit with her for a while, but when I got there, a woman was standing in front of her grave.”
“Did you know who this person was?”
“No, I have never seen her before, and when I questioned who she was and why she was there, I swear her eyes looked right through me.”
I watched Ben stiffen as I continued to share what happened. He looked unsettled, but I just continued on.
“Did she say anything to you? Give a reason to why she was there?”
“It was very strange. Because I didn’t know who she was, I kept a little distance between us. I noticed she had placed pink carnations down in front of the headstone, but there was no note or even a card from the florist they were purchased from. She looked very sad and in deep pain. Although she was beautiful and well put-together, there was something about her I just couldn’t place. And then she said, ‘I’m the one who killed your mother. I’m sorry,’ and before I could respond, she was gone.”
“Oh my god, it’s no wonder why you were so upset. Why would this woman say such a thing?”
“Ben, don’t you see? What if this is the drunk driver? I never got to confron
t the woman responsible for killing my mother. We didn’t know her name and was told by my parents’ lawyer that the charges had been reduced, and she would serve no jail time. I told you this, Ben. Leah wanted to look into it more, but our lawyer told her not to pursue it and to just move on with our lives. Now, two years later, I may have met her! And at my mother’s grave! I can’t tell Leah any of this, not when she’s so close to having everything she’s always wanted.”
“I agree, but only for now. Your sister loves you and was very worried about you. You are going to have to tell her something about last night, and then in the meantime, maybe we can do a little digging and find out more about this woman.”
“You would do that for me?”
“I would do anything for you, Hallie, because I love you and you are mine to take care of and protect. I never want to see you in the pain I saw last night.”
“I love you,” I said, and I leaned forward to kiss my amazing boyfriend. “So, your turn. Are you going to tell me about your dad? And why you sent the text?”
“I guess you’re not the only one that had something strange happen to them. I got home from classes and was really tired. I took a shower and ordered us some dinner and then fell asleep waiting for you to arrive. I don’t know what happened, but I felt something off, and I woke up suddenly to see my father inside of the apartment, just watching me.”
“Creepy, why didn’t he just wake you?”
“Your guess is as good as mine. We began to argue. Some things never change when it comes to my volatile relationship I have with my father. Can we get out of here? It’s nice out. Let’s go for a walk,” he suggested and then extended his hand for me to take. I knew whatever Ben was going to say had to be hard, but I would listen and be there for him.
We drove to a local park and took a walk along the greenway. You had the usual joggers and cyclists, but it wasn’t too crowded for a Friday afternoon. He held my hand and once in a while would bring it up to his lips to kiss and tell me he loved me. Ben was a romantic and never stopped with his sweet gestures or words of endearments. He let out a deep sigh and then another before finally continuing with what happened with his father.
“Hallie, you have asked me about my family, and I’ve always avoided the subject, because I don’t have a good relationship with either one of my parents. I know it sounds shitty to say that, but it doesn’t make it less true. I had nannies that raised me, and when I was old enough, I was shipped off to boarding school. When I came home for the holidays, I was either alone in my room or putting on appearances at a function that I was required to be at with my father and mother.”
“How sad. I’m sorry, Ben.”
“Don’t be, I’m not. My father worked and traveled all the time. My mother played her role as she was expected to do—perfect all the time. She’s beautiful, Hallie, with flawless skin and gorgeous long, silky hair. I remember when I was really little, I used to play with it, and it would feel so soft between my fingers. It was those rare moments I felt like I had a real mum to love me, but then something would happen, and she would go away for long periods of time. My father never offered any real explanations, and it wasn’t my place to ask.”
He continued, “This was my upbringing, and then I was sent off to university and was there for two years before my father announced he was needed in the United States and would be there for an unspecified amount of time. He had me placed at UNC, Chapel Hill, and the best day of my life was the day I met you. You see, Hallie, all the bullshit my father has put me through brought me to you, and for that, I can take anything else he dishes out, because I have you. Hallie, this is going to be hard for you to hear, but I promise you, I will never honor this wish from my father. He asked me to return to London to help my mom and to break things off with you. I refused him, and then I got Leah’s call and left.”
I didn’t know if I should ask twenty questions or just hug him and beg him to never leave me. If he did, I don’t know what I would do. I wiped away a tear, and then Ben made it better.
“I love you, Hallie. I’m not going anywhere.”
15
Breakable truths
Ben…
I knew I had to reassure Hallie that no matter what my father would threaten me with, I was here to stay. She seemed better after we cleared the air but wanted to talk more about my family, and all I wanted to do was be done with it. We continued walking, and then she asked me to stop and take a seat on one of the benches that lined the lake.
“Ben, what about your mom? Don’t you miss her at all? She’s obviously very troubled, and maybe seeing you would help her.”
“I don’t really know her, and I don’t know what I could do for her at this point. When my father asked—no, told—me that I had to go back to London and break up with you was like a punch to my chest. I just stood there and thought, ‘Who is this man? Is he that miserable with his own life that he has to destroy mine?’ I’ve never asked anything of him and have been the dutiful son. If he can’t be happy for me, then fuck him. I don’t need him in my life or ours, for that matter.”
“And you will be okay with that? If you go against him and force his hand, he will just cut you off? Ben, you are so close to graduating. You just have to wait it out for a couple of more months, and then you are going to leave here with your degree. I’m just afraid that if you make your father angry enough, he’s going to hold that over your head and mess up all that you have worked for. Don’t do it, Ben, not even for me.”
“Hallie, what are you saying? Because if it’s what I’m thinking, then the answer is no. Let him come after me and do his worst. I can take it, and I was very smart with the money he has given to me. I have it safely put away. I’ll be fine.”
“But you shouldn’t have to if there is a way to compromise with your father.” She began to raise her voice, which I didn’t like and in such a public place.
Now I sound like him. Oh, fuck my life! This is what happens when I allow him the power to control me. I took a breath and then held Hallie by her shoulders so she could look at me.
“Baby, listen to me,” I quietly said. Her anger was shifting, but she still seemed upset. “I will get to the bottom of this with my father. I never finished my conversation with him last night, and I’m sure I haven’t seen the last of him. I will talk to him and find out what’s going on with my mother. I promise I will not abandon her, but you have to understand that she’s been this way my entire life. I’m not sure what I can do. I know this must sound so heartless, but it’s the truth. I can count on one hand the times I felt she was a real mother to me, and the rest was just empty voids that others tried to fill. What I needed, she was never able to give.”
Hallie lunged herself in my arms and cried on my shoulders. She felt sorry for me, and that’s one thing she didn’t have to be. I didn’t want my girl crying over something that cannot be changed. It is what it is, and not every family was the happy ones with food all of their faces. How I wish it could have been different, but it was never to come to pass, and I’m over it.
“Please, stop crying. You did enough of that last night. Listen, I’m going to drive you to your dorm, and you are going to pack a bag for the weekend and spend it with your sister. You need to re-connect with Leah, and while you are doing that, I will try my best to do the same with my father. I make no promises, but for you, I will try.”
“Thank you, Ben. I love you.”
“Same here, beautiful girl.”
I took Hallie back to the dorm, and we were happy to find it empty. We locked the door and made love before I drove her back to Cary. I had never been separated from Hallie more than a few hours between classes, so I needed to be with her again before our time apart began.
Leah waved me off from the door and stood there with her arms wide open for her sister to run into. They were so sweet together, and I blew Hallie a kiss before shifting my car into drive.
My father hadn’t been back to my apartment, and I was thankful
for that. No calls either, which raised my alarms a bit. I hit the interstate toward Charlotte and prepared for my three-hour drive. I called his office after leaving Hallie and knew he was there. My father worked long hours, and by the time I get into town, he would still be in his office. It was my turn to show up at his front door, and because my father doesn’t like any public scenes, I know he will see me. After all, I am his son.
I couldn’t believe how much traffic I was stuck in driving to Charlotte. It was Friday night after all, but for some reason, I didn’t believe it would be this bad. It was well over four hours by the time I got into town and made it to my father’s office.
I handed off my car to the valet, and after being cleared by security, I made my way up to the executive floor. I wasn’t here enough to remember the way. This floor was huge, and it housed many private offices.
I walked up to the main reception area and was directed down to where my father’s office was. His assistant, Lorena, greeted me with pleasantries and asked me to wait a moment while she called my father. I watched her mannerisms change as she listened carefully to whatever my father was saying to her, and then she placed the phone down back in its cradle and addressed me.
“I’m so sorry, Ben, but your father is going to be held up in a meeting for several more hours, and he told me to tell you that he will not be able to see you today.” She looked genuinely sorry, because I knew she was being forced to lie to me.
No, fuck that! I’ve played this game before with my father, and I am not going anywhere. I placed my hands on the desk and leaned forward for only Lorena to hear. I said, “Do me a favor, and go get a cup of coffee. If you’re not here at your desk, then you can’t prevent me from barging into my father’s office, because we both know he’s in there all on his own, right?”
She didn’t give me a verbal confirmation, but her eyes said what I needed to know. She rose from her desk, pressed a small key fob in the palm of my hand, and then walked away. I knew what this was. It unlocked my father’s office, because knowing the bastard, his door was locked. Fucker!
Before We Knew Page 11